Modest exercise clothing?

[wbrisc92]

Thank you rose for your response. I do believe men should take more control of themselves as far as lust goes, and do their best to look away if they see something drool worthy. My goal in dressing more modestly is to prevent the occasion of sin and the initial lustful thought. If i dress in a way that causes a stir in the deep brain of a man then he has to control himself and look away, however if i dress modestly he will not have to undergo that inward battle. I’d rather not put the cake in front of him at all, than put it there and expect him not to want to taste it.

 

[wbrisc92]

I strongly disagree with this advice. Dressing immodestly can certainly be a grave matter sufficient for mortal sin.

I would consider looking at the kind of clothes that women wear in organized sports such as soccer and basketball. I, personally, find that these women dress respectably and what they wear looks to be comfortable yet stylish.

Excellent idea! Thank you!

 

[severus68]

Since men can’t seem to control their thoughts,
just wear a burqa and be done with it…

 

[severus68]

I don’t think your boyfriend sounds controlling. Men do think differently than women. If her boyfriend thinks other men might be lusting after her and putting other men in danger of sinning, it would probably be best to not wear a tank top and maybe a t-shirt. Do you work out with your boyfriend? Maybe your choice of clothing is causing him to sin and lust after you. We have to think of others when we dress! I once heard a sermon that women should never show their shoulders, wear a top no lower than two fingertips from her collarbone, and wear something long enough to cover your knees when you sit down. This could be dressing guidelines for mass, but I’d advise to at least cover your shoulders and not wear a tight fitting top! Definitely stay away from tight fitting yoga pants. I wear a t shirt and loose capri sweat pants to the gym.

I disagree, he does seem controlling. If her bf and any men who are so easily prone to lust should stay out of gyms.

 

[severus68]

If you are a good looking female you can wear trash bags held together with duct tape, guys at the gym are still going to look.

above the knee , below the knee, tank tops, shirts, men shorts, sweat shirts, sweat pants, capri pants, regular shirts, shirts that expose clevage to a degree, what ever

doesn’t matter; if someone finds you attractive at the gym, you will get noticed.

plus think about this, some women work really hard to get to where they are at, so the gym is a place among many to show off, and why not, they earned it. if one can not show off at the gym, men or women, then everyone needs to cover up at the beach as well, men need to put on shirts and women wear one piece suits or the outfits before say 1955.

I go to the gym enough to spot the show boats, gym rats, juice heads, people that are there to really lose weight or are in some kind of athletic training and everything in between.

it boils down to insecurity if ones boyfriend is requesting his girlfriend to cover up or wear something that doesnt accent her assets.

now if one is dressing to get a reaction out of the boyfriend, because she knows it upsets him or she knows he has some insecurities then that is a different story i suppose.

Good post. Some men will lust at the sight of a woman in burqas.

 

[severus68]

Oh say it isn’t so! Just when you thought it was safe to read the forums again!

“Show me the way back home. I am tired …”

 

[severus68]

knightsofdivinemercy.com/2011/06/11/top-10-reasons-women-should-dress-modestly/

10 – Modesty reflects an understanding of who a woman truly is.
Modesty starts inside a person’s heart and mind. Who am I? Why do I exist? If a woman answers she is a beautiful daughter of God, then modesty will naturally follow.
9 – Modesty isn’t about dressing in unattractive clothes as some think it is.
There are too many options in clothing to not give modesty a try. Yes, it might not be the first thing on the rack you go shopping for, but it is worth finding clothing that brings out a woman’s beauty without revealing too much.
8 – Modesty attracts the kind of guys you ought to want to attract.
If a woman is afraid that she must turn a man’s eye by dressing immodestly, then she should ask herself just what kind of guy does she want to attract?
7 – Mary dressed modestly.
Truly there is no more beautiful woman who ever lived than Mary. Why wouldn’t any woman want to be more like her?
6 – It helps protect women.
A woman can still dress to be beautiful, but the mystery of a woman’s body is protected from being used. Modesty provides a needed defense against usage.
5 – It sets a good example for others.
Young girls and teens need good examples of beautiful women who are modest. The attacks of immodest are Legion and we need a good counter-example.
4 – Women are worthy of respect.
Respect can be easily lost when a woman tries to promote herself by being immodest.
3 -** It helps your brothers to avoid lust.
Women would be shocked if they were to enter the head of the average modern young man in a crowded room of immodest women. This isn’t to blame an immodestly dressed woman for a man’s sin of lust. But, men today need all the help they can get to fight lust and sin. Won’t you help them?**
2 – It shows true beauty.
A woman’t true beauty comes from her dignity of being made in God’s image. If any woman wants to truly reflect God’s beauty, it starts with modesty.
1 – It is a virtue.
Modesty is a virtue that helps control behavior so we do not excite the sexuality of another. It is also a fruit of the Holy Spirit. All of us could use more virtue in our lives.

Are modern young men different from young men in say 1960? Those men you describe need to help themselves, pray hard and perhaps stay away from women until they mature and have self control.

 

[Walking_Home]

It’s not hard to imagine a man would have a problem in this immodest culture so if he is struggling with his thougths, he can only do so much until the next scantily clad woman walks by him. Everyone has that attitude “It’s all about me. I don’t care how my actions affect you.” We are told to not be “stumbling blocks” for other people and we will all be held responsible for our actions.

Back to OP, I wear capri workout pants and a t-shirt mostly.

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The man doing the leching – is responsible for his own thoughts/actions. Each one of us – with God’s help— has the ability to overcome our weaknesses – but we need to make ourselves accountable – and not pass the responsibility and make another a scapegoat…

 

[SouthCatholic]

oh boy this thread is quickly devolving into one of those threads again.

 

[PaulinVA]

Piece of Advice Number One: Run from boys/men who want to control you - what you eat, what you wear, who you talk to.

Piece of Advice Number Two: Some women do not need to worry about this. Some do, and, as one poster said, they could wear trash bags and get noticed.

Piece of Advice Number Three: Men - don’t stare. Women - don’t dress so men will stare.

 

[austenbosten]

Piece of Advice Number One: Run from boys/men who want to control you - what you eat, what you wear, who you talk to.

Piece of Advice Number Two: Some women do not need to worry about this. Some do, and, as one poster said, they could wear trash bags and get noticed.

Piece of Advice Number Three: Men - don’t stare. Women - don’t dress so men will stare.

That’s says it all.

 

[Sarabande]

What do you suggest for modest as well as practical exercise clothing?

I usually where mid-thigh length shorts and t-shirts or tank tops, but my boyfriend insists that my shorts are too short and when I wear yoga or running pants he says they are too tight. He suggested I wear men’s basketball shorts, but they are heavy and, to be honest, make feel a bit masculine. Any suggestions?

I think what you are currently wearing sounds fine. I tend to wear large t-shirts and gym shorts and sometimes yoga pants/capris. Unfortunately, being well-endowed (even more so since I am currently nursing - I went from a C cup to an E) there is nothing that will keep my girls from bouncing all over the place. The sports bra and a large t-shirt can only do so much to control/cover them up.

 

[severus68]

It sounds to me that you are already dressed modestly and appropriately for the gym.

Why does this forum constantly fixate on ‘near occasion of sin’ and suggesting other people may be responsible for our own lustful thoughts? Why does nobody ever make the point that we have Free Will?

If I see a fit young man in Speedos, my brain will register him as a good specimen of manhood I can appreciate his fine physique…

I may (attraction is a funny old thing) entertain momentarily lustful thoughts …but…it would then be my choice and my responsibilty as to whether I indulged in those thoughts and started to fantasize about said lovely specimen. My choice - my responsibility!

Yes, men are primarily visual creatures and many will find it initially more of a task to focus their minds off a well-honed female physique - but the responsiblity is still with them. If you have a particular weakness for such things, it is your responsibility to work on it. Just like building up muscle tome and stamina, learning to focus the mind is something that comes with practice and effort: some have to make more effort than others, but that’s just life!

Wearing the most appropriate sports equipment for sports is sensible - not provocative.

Suggesting men are ‘incapable’ of controlling their lustful thoughts is patronising and silly! It’s like saying women are incapable of rational thought several days a month and ergo, if they choose to scream, cry, sulk and possibly resprt to physical violence - it must be the man’s fault for pushing her over the top

Yes, there are women who genuinely have an enormous struggle holding things together, but it’s still their responsibility to seek help and manage their responses. They still have a choice!

I think the boyfriend in this case sounds controlling. Why is lust seen as the ‘wasn’t my fault’ sin?

If you put a plate of cream cakes under his nose and he scoffed the lot - would you be responsible for his gluttony?
If his mum bought him a new set of super-snuggly bedding - would it be her fault if he couldn’t get up in the morning?
If he was the most amazing specimen of manhood in the world and you bought him a mirror - would it be your fault if he spent all day gazing at himself?

Whatever happened to taking responsibility for one’s own actions and responses?

Very well said.

 

[severus68]

It’s not hard to imagine a man would have a problem in this immodest culture so if he is struggling with his thougths, he can only do so much until the next scantily clad woman walks by him. Everyone has that attitude “It’s all about me. I don’t care how my actions affect you.” We are told to not be “stumbling blocks” for other people and we will all be held responsible for our actions.

Back to OP, I wear capri workout pants and a t-shirt mostly.

Surely it is not a matter of all fully covered men working out in a gym surrounded by scantily clad women all out to incite those ‘poor’ men to lust. Firstly, which man fully covers up to work out in a gym. Many wear shorts, tanks, whatever. Secondly, I am sure that not all women go to gyms just to strut around. I believe they are there to work out too.

 

[i_am_a_Catholic]

Thank you rose for your response. I do believe men should take more control of themselves as far as lust goes, and do their best to look away if they see something drool worthy. My goal in dressing more modestly is to prevent the occasion of sin and the initial lustful thought. If i dress in a way that causes a stir in the deep brain of a man then he has to control himself and look away, however if i dress modestly he will not have to undergo that inward battle. I’d rather not put the cake in front of him at all, than put it there and expect him not to want to taste it.

Appreciate it. Wish many women thought the way you do

We are all here to make it to heaven. Glad you are willing to dress modestly for the sake of helping a fellow brother who might be having an inward battle.

 

[i_am_a_Catholic]

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You need to work more on overcoming your weakness – instead of turning women into scapegoats.

This sort of reply is a bit offensive.

Is that what you will tell the priest who is giving that sermon?

 

[i_am_a_Catholic]

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Again:

And again, a man might be poor. He has to work to get out of the situation but we are also called to give him a helping hand.

Same goes for struggling with impurity. You seem to want to just blame others and not do your part. That is not a very Catholic thing to do.

 

[avemaria154]

I couldn’t agree more. I guess the OP found the advice and wisdom she was looking for.

Thanks for sharing i_am_a_Catholic!

Appreciate it. Wish many women thought the way you do

We are all here to make it to heaven. Glad you are willing to dress modestly for the sake of helping a fellow brother who might be having an inward battle.

 

[avemaria154]

Agreed!

And again, a man might be poor. He has to work to get out of the situation but we are also called to give him a helping hand.

Same goes for struggling with impurity. You seem to want to just blame others and not do your part. That is not a very Catholic thing to do.

 

[Walking_Home]

It sounds to me that you are already dressed modestly and appropriately for the gym.

Why does this forum constantly fixate on ‘near occasion of sin’ and suggesting other people may be responsible for our own lustful thoughts? Why does nobody ever make the point that we have Free Will?

If I see a fit young man in Speedos, my brain will register him as a good specimen of manhood I can appreciate his fine physique…

I may (attraction is a funny old thing) entertain momentarily lustful thoughts …but…it would then be my choice and my responsibilty as to whether I indulged in those thoughts and started to fantasize about said lovely specimen. My choice - my responsibility!

Yes, men are primarily visual creatures and many will find it initially more of a task to focus their minds off a well-honed female physique - but the responsiblity is still with them. If you have a particular weakness for such things, it is your responsibility to work on it. Just like building up muscle tome and stamina, learning to focus the mind is something that comes with practice and effort: some have to make more effort than others, but that’s just life!

Wearing the most appropriate sports equipment for sports is sensible - not provocative.

Suggesting men are ‘incapable’ of controlling their lustful thoughts is patronising and silly! It’s like saying women are incapable of rational thought several days a month and ergo, if they choose to scream, cry, sulk and possibly resprt to physical violence - it must be the man’s fault for pushing her over the top

Yes, there are women who genuinely have an enormous struggle holding things together, but it’s still their responsibility to seek help and manage their responses. They still have a choice!

I think the boyfriend in this case sounds controlling. Why is lust seen as the ‘wasn’t my fault’ sin?

If you put a plate of cream cakes under his nose and he scoffed the lot - would you be responsible for his gluttony?
If his mum bought him a new set of super-snuggly bedding - would it be her fault if he couldn’t get up in the morning?
If he was the most amazing specimen of manhood in the world and you bought him a mirror - would it be your fault if he spent all day gazing at himself?

Whatever happened to taking responsibility for one’s own actions and responses?

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