My priest yelled at a parishioner in front of others

  • Thread starter Thread starter SacredHeartBassist
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
Idk I just think there’s a way to say something to little old church ladies and a way you shouldn’t
 
And every one of us sometimes say or do something rude to other people. Be forgiving, be kind, and speak to the “other priest” then let it go trusting he has handled it.

Oh, and most women would get offended if you called them a “little old church lady”, so, perhaps just say " a parishioner " 😉 Advice from a little old church lady.
 
Last edited:
That woman has probably been a loyal faithful Catholic most of her life and she has been treated dreadfully. She may well have children and grandchildren who are disconnected from the Catholic Church and hearing about her poor treatment could be a huge setback for their faith.
 
Probably could have been handled better.

Maybe he was having a bad day. I’d move on.
 
Just wondering…did he need to yell at her about this? He couldn’t calmly ask her not to adjust it?
 
Exactly!! I feel the same way. It’s not like we can strip to our bikinis in church.

And wearing layers is really fashionable, so they should thank us! 😆
 
Hmmm… reminds me a little bit of my former Parish Priest.

We used to have caretakers for the property many years ago. The family originally lived on the grounds but then moved into a nearby neighborhood. Anyways, BINGO was short on volunteers one Friday so Father marched over to their house and angrily demanded that the entire family volunteer!

Our Priest had a habit of regularly being abrasive if not verbally abusive. Thankfully, he was reassigned.
 
Last edited:
Maybe she’s a repeat offender at blurting stuff out and disturbing others. Many older folks think they own the churches they attend so start adjusting thermostats, turning lights on and off, staking out pews and parking spaces, etc. It may have been more efficient for the priest to publicly reprimand her and hope that the other interrupters also learned a lesson. God knows that if a priest had to privately counsel every old folk in the parish about their complaints and eccentricities, he’d never get a wink of sleep.
 
Last edited:
What the priest did was wrong, and there is no way around it. I think I’d talk to any deacons and the priest. If that didn’t work I’d go to the bishop. Since he humiliated and verbally abused the poor old lady in public, he needs to apologize to her in public.
 
The priest lost control and it was unfortunate because this kind of thing does not happen in the church. And when it does, it is unfortunate for everybody.

Everybody should take a deep breath but more so the priest and perhaps the old woman as well, that could trigger such an inappropriate reaction from the priest. There probably be much more that we do not know but except for the account from the OP.

Perhaps the priest could take time out for a few months for a personal solitude to compose himself and to examine his role as a minister of God. When we do something that is indefensible that goes against our good nature, it probably is a manifestation of something deep within.

It may be good to gently speak to the priest, at least to let him know that what he did get the attention of some people.
 
Last edited:
While I think this could have been handled more calmly and privately, I can’t help but wonder if the elderly lady has a habit of blurting stuff out at Adoration, or if there is a general issue with people making noise at Adoration, and the priest has received multiple complaints about it from people who feel their prayer is being disrupted. I also wonder if this is the first time the priest has spoken to this lady about this type of issue. Oftentimes when people lose patience it is because there’s been multiple incidents and the person is just at the end of their rope. The onlookers who did not see the past 6 times this already happened and just walked in on the last act are not going to know the backstory.
Just pray for all involved. If that elderly lady is a regular Mass goer, I’m guessing she won’t scare off that easily.
 
bobperk said:
Maybe she’s a repeat offender at blurting stuff out and disturbing others. Many older folks think they own the churches they attend so start adjusting thermostats, turning lights on and off, staking out pews and parking spaces, etc. It may have been more efficient for the priest to publicly reprimand her and hope that the other interrupters also learned a lesson. God knows that if a priest had to privately counsel every old folk in the parish about their complaints and eccentricities, he’d never get a wink of sleep.
Click to expand...
I think this is a good point. We have no idea what this priest’s relationship with this parishioner is like. If she, or others, have been getting on his nerves, it makes it more understandable that he would explode. He was still way out of line, but we are all human.

Priests have to deal with constant stress, complaints, nagging, etc, and they have to handle it with much more grace and tact than the average layperson. Pray for your priest!
 
True story: a priest I know said a woman came to him and said, “Father, I have this person I just cannot get along with, and I don’t know what to do about it. Is that a sin?” He told her that feelings aren’t wrong, but it is wrong to hold a grudge or to rehearse bad thoughts about someone. She didn’t know what she could do to stop thinking badly about this person. He asked her to try doing something nice for the person, because often it is easier to like someone after you do nice things for them and they appreciate it. She thought about it for a minute and said that might work. Then she said, “So, Father, um…what kind of cookies do you like?”
 
Last edited:
On a similar note, I know people who have confessed to making fun of the priest that was hearing their confession.
 
CTBcin said:
On a similar note, I know people who have confessed to making fun of the priest that was hearing their confession.
Click to expand...
There is a good reason the faithful sometimes find a regular confessor who is not their pastor, LOL. Seriously, though, I knew a pastor who positively told the staff who worked for the parish to find a confessor other than him, since there were many parishes nearby.
 
I think you need to speak to the lady herself and ask if she wants you to come to her defence. If so, you both go to the priest together and discuss the situation.
 
I have noticed - there are - some older wealthy people -
that must be planning to leave some of their money - to the church - in a legal “Will “
After - they pass on.
What a terrible fix for all Priests to be in.
Imagine the various scenarios !

They are 5 years away from dying…let’s say.
They act like stockholders would.

I think of the movie “ Thorn birds “
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top