My relationship with my former parish priest

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I’m just curious, why did the Confessor say that this sometimes happens? I would like to gain some insight into this in case I ever need to help someone down the road
Well I gave him background on my childhood and how much tragedy I have had in my life and he said women look to priest because they have all these great qualities that we would look for in a mate but also Priest look at women who are vulnerable and by nature want to protect them, that is why they became priest to protect, guide and serve. He said the we both took that care and need to protect each other and formed it into something it should not have been which i do understand now, those feelings could have been expressed in another way!
 
Well I gave him background on my childhood and how much tragedy I have had in my life and he said women look to priest because they have all these great qualities that we would look for in a mate but also Priest look at women who are vulnerable and by nature want to protect them, that is why they became priest to protect, guide and serve. He said the we both took that care and need to protect each other and formed it into something it should not have been which i do understand now, those feelings could have been expressed in another way!
You know what; I can totally understand this and you are only human. We are all sinners! It’s wonderful when we turn things around and become the Prodigal Son before God during our Confessions.

I turned to a priest last year b/c my tragic past decided to re-visit me when I had my baby daughter and the priest became very protective of me too. He also became cautious and began avoiding me for about a month - until he realized that I wasn’t going to be a problem for him. He even avoided eye contact with me when giving me the Eucharist. I was really surprised by it, but now I understand that he was just protecting himself and now I respect him greatly for that.

Now this priest and I are very close friends b/c we’ve never crossed that boundary. I’m also very close to his best woman friend…funny how things ended up working out 🙂

Well now you will know better in the future if you ever find yourself connected emotionally to a priest. It’s ok to be connected emotionally as long as your feelings and intentions are holy and are for the good of eachother’s vocations. You can still love and befriend a priest without it being inappropriate. In fact it’s very healthy to be close friends with a priest as long as it’s based on the betterment of your souls.

As you come closer to God, you may begin to feel more and more guilty for what happened…don’t…you have confessed and repented. As far as God is concerned, it never happened. He has forgiven you. If you find yourself feeling guilty…it’s just the devil trying to hurt you by putting thoughts into your head. Just pray and understand that God loves you and you HAVE been forgiven.

Good luck repairing your marriage. Your husband sounds like a very good man.

God bless.
 
You know what; I can totally understand this and you are only human. We are all sinners! It’s wonderful when we turn things around and become the Prodigal Son before God during our Confessions.

I turned to a priest last year b/c my tragic past decided to re-visit me when I had my baby daughter and the priest became very protective of me too. He also became cautious and began avoiding me for about a month - until he realized that I wasn’t going to be a problem for him. He even avoided eye contact with me when giving me the Eucharist. I was really surprised by it, but now I understand that he was just protecting himself and now I respect him greatly for that.

Now this priest and I are very close friends b/c we’ve never crossed that boundary. I’m also very close to his best woman friend…funny how things ended up working out 🙂

Well now you will know better in the future if you ever find yourself connected emotionally to a priest. It’s ok to be connected emotionally as long as your feelings and intentions are holy and are for the good of eachother’s vocations. You can still love and befriend a priest without it being inappropriate. In fact it’s very healthy to be close friends with a priest as long as it’s based on the betterment of your souls.

As you come closer to God, you may begin to feel more and more guilty for what happened…don’t…you have confessed and repented. As far as God is concerned, it never happened. He has forgiven you. If you find yourself feeling guilty…it’s just the devil trying to hurt you by putting thoughts into your head. Just pray and understand that God loves you and you HAVE been forgiven.

Good luck repairing your marriage. Your husband sounds like a very good man.

God bless.
👍
 
An update: Thank you to all who have posted! I receive and read all of your posts. After posting this that week I did go to confession and spoje to a priest about this situation who gave me great guidance and explained to me why this sometimes happens, on both ends women to priest and priest to women. I thank you all for your prayers. I just woke up one day and it smacked me. It must of smacked him too because he told me that he needs help!! I was so happy that he said that and told him that he should get it and I cant be the one to help him or be in his life because his calling is higher than me and he belongs to all of us not just me!! He finally agreed with me that contact isnt the best thing maybe years down the road but not in the near future!! He was shocked by my understanding but what I was is very happy for two reasons: Happy to know that he is devoted enough to his vocation that he could NEVER let anything physical happen and happy that he wanted to let go as much as I did. Our care for each other should have never taken this path. To answer some’s question, I would never ask a priest if he wanted to marry me, that wasnt what this was about, It was a deep care that we mistoke for something sexual when it could have been a brother sister love. Also yes my husband found out and it has not destroyed my marriage. He said he understood where I was coming from because he was negelecting that aspect in my life and has vowed to make me happy again no matter what it takes!! I again thank you for your prayers and please continue to pray for the priest, my husband, my family and me!!
That is the most wonderful news I’ve heard in a while… Praise God in His Mercy!!!

As one or two already mentioned, the power of prayer is awesome. It’s much more sublime yet also more powerful than anyone can imagine. Just look where it brought you. That mutual “smack” you both got I’m sure was not a coincidence.

I’m going to continue to pray for you and the priest, not only because you both need it, but because God wants us to pray for others always.

(Oh - and don’t forget those in Purgatory who’ve had similar experiences during their lives and may have no one else to pray for them.)

God Bless!!! 👍
Snert
 
Well done Always Catholic! I am so happy to hear your husband understands that you need to work on your marriage together, I really pray that you both have a renewing of your love and commitment to each other and a new dawn in your marriage. This really is an answer to prayer and you can look to your future with hope.
God bless you.
 
Praise God! God bless you as go forward and heal. It gives me great hope.

jb
 
I think that young woman didn’t have anybody to confide in with her problem with her relationship with that priest. This is why she kept us updated. We were the only ones she trusted with her problem. Since she is so young she didn’t understand or have the wisdom to do the right thing right away.

I believe that it was everybody who prayed for her to stop seeing this priest that finally one day it came to her head to stop seeing him. I think that is the day that God’s light returned to save that young woman from the devil.

This is why when I have a problem I always come here because I do believe in the power of prayer.

That young gal had a lot of guts to come here and read what everybody had to say about her relationship with that priest. Then… one day… she saw the truth on how wrong she was on what she was doing. Her need for that priest just left her and her feelings became nutralized towards him. He nolonger had that strong hold on her anymore because I am guessing that God hit that priest on the head to cut the cord that kept that girl tied to him emotionally. I think a spiritual exorcism took place all of a sudden because of all the prayers to God to help this young woman. She was obssed sp by him and his needs and wasn’t looking at her needs. Then one day God freed her from that priest.
 
I really needed to see that sometimes prayers are answered. Always Catholic, that confessor sounds like a wise man and a keeper. Good luck with your husband and family. You were brave and honest and didn’t let us dispirit you with our comments. Keep up the good work!

This is the best post of the day.
👍
 
I am happy for the OP- it can be tough to ask for help when the problem your asking help for can cause such scandal. Just look at some of the harsh reactions she got here as well as some of the loving ones - and you can probably understand the fear. But God granted her a good confessor when she was ready. When the student ready the teacher will appear.
 
I think that young woman didn’t have anybody to confide in with her problem with her relationship with that priest. This is why she kept us updated. We were the only ones she trusted with her problem. Since she is so young she didn’t understand or have the wisdom to do the right thing right away.

I believe that it was everybody who prayed for her to stop seeing this priest that finally one day it came to her head to stop seeing him. I think that is the day that God’s light returned to save that young woman from the devil.

This is why when I have a problem I always come here because I do believe in the power of prayer.

That young gal had a lot of guts to come here and read what everybody had to say about her relationship with that priest. Then… one day… she saw the truth on how wrong she was on what she was doing. Her need for that priest just left her and her feelings became nutralized towards him. He nolonger had that strong hold on her anymore because I am guessing that God hit that priest on the head to cut the cord that kept that girl tied to him emotionally. I think a spiritual exorcism took place all of a sudden because of all the prayers to God to help this young woman. She was obssed sp by him and his needs and wasn’t looking at her needs. Then one day God freed her from that priest.
👍
 
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