C
Cricket2
Guest
Over the last few weeks it has become apparent that my sister is losing ground in her battle with multiple medical issues. We almost lost her in August of 2012, and she has struggled daily since that time. Now there are signs that there is increased loss of good heart and lung function, as well as another severe Crohn’s attack.
She has suffered for decades with this illness and others. I have taken care of many dying family members over the last 15 years, but caring for my sister has been the hardest. It is hard to see the signs I see, and know what they mean. It is also hard to think that a good part of my life has been spent caring for sick and dying family members, and that even when my sister is gone, that role for me will continue.
The only one’s left in my immediate family are my father, brother and sister. None of us married or had children. So, one by one we have said our good-byes. My gut is telling me that my sister may not survive the summer. Even she has told me she has her doubts.
What I sometimes wonder, is why? Why were we all so ill that we could not marry or have children, have steady careers, had to go on disability or become so poor due to medical expenses? Why does it seem that I am the one who will be the care giver for everyone else, and who will take care of me when I am the only one left?
Today is just one of those days, that it all seems so sad and unfair. So I would ask everyone, please remember what a gift your health is, your family, your job, your ability to do the things you like. Because it is so easy to lose it all, or to never really have any of it. And when you think you hate your job, don’t. Disability checks barely cover expenses and not being able to do things is so depressing. If you are angry with a family member, make up. They can be gone in an instant. Don’t do things that damage your health, your liver, your lungs, your heart, because some of us never have good health to start with, and we would give everything to know what that is.
Be grateful for the time you have, your family, your friends and your jobs; because they can be gone so fast, and you can stand alone, very alone.
She has suffered for decades with this illness and others. I have taken care of many dying family members over the last 15 years, but caring for my sister has been the hardest. It is hard to see the signs I see, and know what they mean. It is also hard to think that a good part of my life has been spent caring for sick and dying family members, and that even when my sister is gone, that role for me will continue.
The only one’s left in my immediate family are my father, brother and sister. None of us married or had children. So, one by one we have said our good-byes. My gut is telling me that my sister may not survive the summer. Even she has told me she has her doubts.
What I sometimes wonder, is why? Why were we all so ill that we could not marry or have children, have steady careers, had to go on disability or become so poor due to medical expenses? Why does it seem that I am the one who will be the care giver for everyone else, and who will take care of me when I am the only one left?
Today is just one of those days, that it all seems so sad and unfair. So I would ask everyone, please remember what a gift your health is, your family, your job, your ability to do the things you like. Because it is so easy to lose it all, or to never really have any of it. And when you think you hate your job, don’t. Disability checks barely cover expenses and not being able to do things is so depressing. If you are angry with a family member, make up. They can be gone in an instant. Don’t do things that damage your health, your liver, your lungs, your heart, because some of us never have good health to start with, and we would give everything to know what that is.
Be grateful for the time you have, your family, your friends and your jobs; because they can be gone so fast, and you can stand alone, very alone.
