B
bitterhope
Guest
Well, some people may agree with you, but as a mom of many close in age little ones I never despised my husband. I never blamed him for keeping me pregnant or viewed raising the kids as my job but instead as OUR job. Maybe a lot of women do feel that way. Enough here seem to post the disappointment in having so many unplanned kids and I’m reminded that it is a big problem. People say that all couples should be well versed in NFP to prevent feeling as you describe this wife feeling. I’ve been told that I’m the exception and not the rule in feeling that God’s plans are more important than mine so I just accept what He hands me. I find joy in living this life instead of allowing myself to give into the temptation to despair. No, it’s not always easy but what else can I do? Not one person here or in real life has been able to answer me when I ask: “What about those of us that NFP does not work for? What do you suggest we do?” My answer to myself has been that I just become thankful to God for the little lives He has entrusted to my husband and me, and now that it’s not possible to have more at the moment we will abstain. Life sucks, but I have hope that when this world is gone I will be in paradise with my loved ones. Hope brings about joy. People look at the Cross instead of the Reward and that is why so many become depressed. But still I would like someone to answer what a couple is supposed to do when NFP does not work for a couple and abstinence isn’t an option they are willing to embrace for one reason or another. And honestly even though it appears we as a couple will need to do just that, part of the vocation of marriage is intimacy between the spouses. We already are used to not having sex because we spend a lot of time apart, but a couple that is not used to that may experience huge problems.A woman who has had too many children and has had no success with NFP is always exhausted in this selfish world. She begins to subconsciously despise her husband and decides to keep away from him as she realises that she is left with the big problem of raising children. She abstains from sex and if this couple never had a solid foundation their marriage will fall apart, they will get lonely and cracks will appear. The husband also tired by the children and lack of support from society and the church and work also willingly abstains by then. He to May resent her. They are both continually tired and arguments begin. Both of them revert to masturbation and the whole downward spiral begins. It ends up tragically and lonely, hardly what God wanted.
The Church promotes the ideal sexual act which is just that , an Ideal. The act ideally is a prayer and union with God where the man and the women deeply in love after the sacrament of marriage caress each other lovingly, in an unhurried manner and relaxed totally in freedom, until penetration occurs whereby the man especially must put in all the effort as an extra act of love to ensure for the woman to experience a massive transcendental multiple long lasting full body orgasm at the exact time as he does experience the same and ejaculation into the vagina occurs as both couples experience pleasure, love joy and relaxation as an expression of Gods gift to his creatures and the precious semen fertilises the egg and a holy baby is conceived in utter love.
Yes that is beautiful. Does it happen to everybody ? No. Does it happen every time ? No, it takes years of learning and loving to experience such love.
Sometimes the couple just needs a break from the stresses of daily life and worrying about NFP and want to pray together and make love for the evening without having to fear that children will result. When we were people living in a natural world thousands of years ago with natural diets and children were always required and the tribe looked after everybody and everyone lived like an extended family you just made love basically whenever with your wife or used breast feeding not to fall pregnant and infant mortality was high. Sure people were more in tune with their bodies and felt ovulation onset and perhaps avoided that time if they were still tired by life. Today children are placed in a high stress very demanding foreign world to produce workers and consumers of goods and to move progress along so that more wealth can be created for the rich hidden rulers of this world. There are too many unloved people being born and uncared for. The Church offers little support and pretends it doesn’t involve itself in state matters as it watches the family get decimated.
The church needs to support the marriage by supporting the sexual, communicative and child raising life as well as the spiritual life.