Need dating advice please

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Thanks for all your replies. šŸ™‚

We met again this weekend for coffe and talked for 1hr45minutes! She is great company, and it was brilliant to talk with her. We could have talked for a lot longer, we certainly did not exhaust all the topics for conversation.

I care for her very much. She is very special to me and we have so much in common.

Interestingly, we both told each other our birthday dates and she mentioned she would have to make sure she remembers mine (which is in May), which seems to auger well for our friendship/relationship.

We have gone out 5 times over a 2 month period, on average we have seen each other once ever 2 weeks. Although, I have seen her twice in the past two weeks.

But, certainly the foundation of our ā€œrelationshipā€ is a strong friendship which deepens every time I see her. We both talked about our personal lives in relation to God and it felt that we are becoming much more close.

In order to remove the confusion that arose this week because of emails/texting I asked her if she would be happy to talk from now on mostly on the phone and she agreed.

She has a very important work-event on Monday and I thought of ringing her Monday evening to ask her how it went. Plus I will send her a text message Monday morning to wish her good luck for what is an important day in work for her.

Do you think this is important to women?

How often should I ring her during the week? Iā€™m thinking twice?

The only minus point is that she is not free the next 2 weekends, but weā€™ve agreed that our next date will be a walk together by the sea.

I also gave her a wrapped box of chocolates at the end which she very happily accepted.

Iā€™m really not sure how all this Relationship-stuff is supposed to work. We both have never had a relationship before, and we are taking things very slowly.

I suppose I thought that after 2 months, things would have developed quicker, but it does feel that something special has developed and is developing between us.

Your thoughts please?

I really have no idea about relationships, so I would appreciate any specific advice you might have. šŸ™‚
 
I can see you really like her and are thinking about this a lot. But I think you might be overanalyzing it. It might be better to be friends at first. xoxo is good. Give her an xoxo right back at her. Do lunch or coffee, movies or walking, parties, parades, concerts. Donā€™t do romantic dinners, just do fun stuff. Keep it light. Let it evolve. Donā€™t stalk her. You sound like you are obsessing. De-obsess. Relax. Smile. Be the Nice Guy you are. She may have issues she is dealing with right now or might be really focused on school or work. Everything will come round right.
 
Iā€™ll add to the chorus and sayā€“relax! She likes you and apparently enjoys getting to know you. Continue to build your friendship and get to know one another, that is the greatest foundation for any relationship, but definitely begin **talking **more (text messages donā€™t count!)

And donā€™t try to read into the meaning of every little thing. They probably mean what you think they meanā€¦ listen to your gut, you know this girl better than we do ;).

I think the remedy to that is, quite honestly, spending more time with one another so you figure out each otherā€™s mannerisms and such. I guess at the beginning of my friendship with my current bf, we did go out on group dates and things for a couple of months, but we honestly didnā€™t go out on ā€˜one on oneā€™ dates for too long before he asked me to be his ā€˜officialā€™ girlfriend. Continue to build your friendship, and when the time is right think about asking her to make your relationship an exclusive (I guess the word some might use is ā€˜courtingā€™) relationship.

She is waiting for you to make the first move, (itā€™s so exciting for us girls that way, and takes loads of the pressure off!) so as other male posters on the thread have said, try holding her hand, hugging, guide her through a doorway or to the car (the hand in the small of the back makes every girlā€™s heart melt :D). Our first kiss was one month after beginning to date exclusively, seeing each other mostly on weekends like you have, but allow your relationship to progress naturally. Youā€™ll know when the time is right :).

That said, if your friend-who-is-a-girl is anything like me, chocolate is always a fantastic ideaā€¦ well, most of the time.

Funny anecdote: My bf arrived at my house the evening of our one month anniversary, bearing a gift he loved and was sure I would tooā€“chocolate covered cherries. I was giddy with excitement to see him and the chocolateā€“so giddy that I didnā€™t notice that they were cherries, and set them on the table. An hour or so later, we were at the grocery store shopping for ingredients for dinner (that evening was spent cooking together for my family), and in the produce section he pointed out the cherries and asked if I liked them. My response ā€œoh, no! I hate cherries! Especially in candy! Give me pure chocolate any day!ā€ He turned red, got very quiet, and I didnā€™t know why. Only on the drive home did he work up the courage to ask if I realized that he had gotten me chocolate-covered cherries as a gift! šŸ˜› Quite the relationship faux pas on my part, but I did try them. Not too shabby, but I havenā€™t received a box since ;).

Moral of the story: Make sure you know her tastes. Pay attention to what she orders at that coffee shop. But no harm done hereā€¦ weā€™re still happily together after two years, and I still happily tease him about the cherries šŸ˜‰
 
FanofB16, youā€™re so cute. ^^ It sounds like you have a better idea of how to go about a relationship than most people who have had several. Youā€™re doing perfectly. All your ideas sounds great. ^^
Iā€™ll be praying for the two of you.
Relax and enjoy yourselves! ^^
 
Hi. šŸ™‚

Iā€™ve been really grateful to hear your thoughts on dating.

So, instead of emailing and texting, I talked to my lady friend on the phone today. We talked for 30mins about what we had been doing this week, and it was good to talk with her. šŸ˜ƒ We didnā€™t really talk about serious things, we just talked about how our week had been going.

She seemed really happy to talk with me and again the conversation flowed.

In the texts that I have been receiving from her during the week, they have again ended with ā€œxoā€.

Any thoughts on what I should be doing next?

When should I call her next?
 
Take it from a single womenā€¦RELAXā€¦if she feels pressure than it can ruin the realtionship. Donā€™t rush things. They will happen on their own.

Take this time to learn who she is. Sometimes in relationship you fall in love with the ā€œimageā€ of who you think the person is instead of who they really are. Thats why you should take your time.

Donā€™t worry about when you should call. If you want to talk to her then call her. I know as a girl that i want to know if a guy likes me. I donā€™t like the guessing. It drives me crazy.

OH Text messaging. It can be a very dangerous thing. Emotions are hard to see and just because you send it does not mean someone got it. i have had it happen many times were friends have sent messages that i have not received and vice verse.

Just Relax and enjoy this time. Learn about yourself and deepen your realtionship with God.

Beckers
 
if she is putting XO in her messages to youā€¦it means she is interested in romance (unless in the unlikely event she is under 21, and she ā€˜mightā€™ be just acting cute; and yeah, that would be her mistakeā€¦it may help knowing how old she is)ā€¦trouble is you canā€™t tell HOW interested just yet, so take it one day at a timeā€¦she was probably fickle at first and now sees what a great guy you are, and is starting to think there might be more to itā€¦however donā€™t get too excited just yet. ask her out on a date, and see how it goesā€¦just make sure you both know itā€™s a date and if she agrees then the future is wide open! good luckā€¦
 
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