Never dated in my High school career

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I didn’t date until I was out of high school. I could’ve it I wanted to, but was preoccupied with other activities that took up several hours of my day. In my senior year I did occasionally hang out with a few girls, but they weren’t dates; just friends. Go to a party together, go get some ice cream, etc., but that was it.

Don’t worry about it. Fact is, high school kids are extremely immature when it comes to relationships. In my experience, the real maturity comes in post-college. It’s when people start focusing on who they would really like to spend their life with, rather than who’s the cutest, most popular, etc.
 
Don’t do the same mistake that I did. Why? I dated in high school and I ended up as an idiot.
 
But thats just it, I dont want to date. I want to be celibate. I want to be a Priest (Which I feel is my calling)
 
I ask all of you, my Catholic brethren to pray for me, As I will be beginning to pursue Holy Priesthood, though with whom, not exactly sure yet…FSSP, Diocescan, ICKSP, Canons of St. John Cantius, Knights of the EUCHARIST, MFVA, Friars Immaculate

So, please pray for me!! pray that I may remain strong in my commitment to chastity etc.
 
I am a girl, never dated until jun. year of university, and married the guy. This was in 2008! I was never interested in men/finding “a man”, being in a relationship, etc. I had too much to do!

Many of the people I know in stable, happy relationships waited until they were older to date (ready to truly date, seeing if someone is a potential mate). This ranges from 5yrs of marriage to 15. Older than that, and it was more of a norm to marry just out of HS.
 
mymamamary said:
Its not that im too busy, I just dont feel anything there…
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But you do feel something for God…so dedicate your life to Him. Nothing wrong with that. Go where your heart leads you. Forget the rest. 🙂
 
mymamamary said:
Its not that im too busy, I just dont feel anything there…
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That’s OK. Some people don’t, men and women alike. If you’re going to be a priest or even just remain single, the important thing is that you can interact with other people as human beings, both men and women. You know, you have to be able to talk to anyone, work with anyone, extend empathy to anyone. You don’t have to be a frustrated romantic, though.

Do realize that many people who thought they didn’t have any particular interest in romance find that one particular person changes their minds. This is why the Church requires young men to wait until 25 or so before they promise a life of celibacy.
 
mymamamary said:
Well, I am social, Im not a recluse or hermit by any means…:)😃
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Continue to be social…continue to have friendships. Just dont let your friends dictate what kind of relationships you should have. And follow your own heart…if you are meant to love only God, you will know. If you are meant to have a relationship, it will happen. And you wont have to push yourself and constantly wonder if you are meant to meet a woman and fall in love. Love will just hit you over the head like a ton of bricks and you will be powerless to stop it.

You are too young for all this worry and angst! Be patient and let your life just happen. Try not to be anxious about what is coming or what will be. Try to live only in the moment a little, and not worry about things so much. 🙂
 
For the OP: I didn’t date in high school. I just didn’t see the value of it. . . why get all whooped up over some girl, when in just a few months, you’ll be moving on, out of town, to college?

What’s the point? I never saw it. The whole thing looks like an emotional roller coaster to be avoided.
 
Captain_America said:
For the OP: I didn’t date in high school. I just didn’t see the value of it. . . why get all whooped up over some girl, when in just a few months, you’ll be moving on, out of town, to college?

What’s the point? I never saw it. The whole thing looks like an emotional roller coaster to be avoided.
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I hope to be moving off to seminary, so please pray for me! 🙂
 
I am 20 years old and have never had a girlfriend either, although I firmly know that I am asexual (have known kind of since puberty when I failed to be attracted to either sex). I am (as far as I can tell) attractive looking and have been flirted with and pursued by woman and even (nearly) had a sexual encounter when I was drunk at 18 and a girl made an advance on me and put her arm around me and ah various other things. Instead of sleeping with her, I made sure she got a safe cab home because she was seriously in a bad way. I have never regretted this as most “ordinary” guys probably would (I mean non-religious ordinary, heterosexual blokes out there).

At first I thought that I would be a “late bloomer”. Then I thought, “Heck, I must be really fussy”. I just never got attracted to anyone. Didn’t matter whether they were the most physically beautiful woman, I had no attraction and no desire for her or for anybody.

I don’t see myself as abnormal. I didn’t choose not to be sexually attracted. And I’m not sexually active at all so surely there is nothing wrong in my tranquil chastity and celibacy. I used to think that my utter disinterest in sex and either genders would change and I would happily start dating. That day never came. Girls started to wonder whether I was gay because I rejected their advances. They probably still think I am, since I have never told anyone about my asexuality (apart from my father who told me not to label myself and wait longer to see if attraction starts to seep in) - although the absence of “boyfriends” has been noted as well, such that many are perplexed. Apparently they think I’m “saving myself”. They’ll have to wait a long time! lol 😃

For the record I am perfectly happy the way I am and am at peace with my sexuality (Or ah lack thereof).

I do hate the rumours about my lack of sexual activity, which is obvious to everyone but I’m just carrying my cross and being the way God wants me to be.

I didn’t know about asexuality until I checked it up. It was a relief. I just screamed, “Thank God - I’m not a freak!!!”
 
mymamamary said:
Dear Forum

I’m in grade 12, in High School, and I do not have a girl-friend. I did not have one for the past 3 years either. Im still a bachelor and I dont know why. Its odd, I like girls, like any other guy, but not to date :confused::confused: . I was also asked (its a public high school), for the past few days in sarcastic tones “You wheeling any girls recently” “are you saving yourself for marriage” or the more graphic ones “Any kills yet?” etc. I said nope. Thats the weird thing though, I feel like a “queer” for saying these things. I’m not attracted to dating girls and marriage? whats wrong with me? I enjoy being a virgin and proud of that pure white robe that I try to mantain via Confession. Like friends will ask me about getting married and having kids, But I’m not excited in the least. I feel weird, can someone explain to me??

Anyone else like this??
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Don’t worry! I never had a girlfriend in highschool, had a couple of crush fails but didn’t really date, and nobody gets to shove it in my face now that I’m getting on 30 and have no girlfriend either (let alone wife). For some people it comes naturally, for others it’s a pain. What’s not worth it is settling or getting into meaningless relationships that end in failure sooner or later (and hurt more when later). You need a wife when you’re prepared to have a house full of kids, having a girlfriend throughout your unmarried time is not necessary. And got to be tougher than kills and conquests. Prove yourself in other fields! And you aren’t queer just because you haven’t found a compatible person yet and are refusing to settle for one night stands and the like.
 
Me and my girlfriend never really dated in High School either and we found each other 👍

Just because you’re not interested in dating or haven’t “killed” the entire cheerleading squad doesn’t make you a homosexual. I never had the confidence to speak to women when I was in HS and sometimes I had doubts that maybe I was gay, because “I didn’t have a gf” Well I’m glad I never gave into such doubts because I have met someone very special.

Don’t let High School get to you man, it’s prison and you only have a year left to go, just countdown till you get released and then go about your life. You won’t have to deal with insecure guys who measure their success in life by how many notches in their bedpost that they have.

Just live your life dude and if you want to, search for that right girl and God will do all the rest 👍
 
I’m probably just echoing the other posters but please do not worry about not dating/having a girlfriend or what other people think! It’s none of their business.

But I know how difficult it can be. I graduated from college this spring and have yet to date. I also have a significant disability and live in a tiny town. I think guys are scared off by my disability because I went to a university where guys outnumbered women 3 to 1 and I had tons of guy friends. But no one took it a step further.

Relatives love to ask about my relationship status and at times it is maddening because they don’t understand. But the majority of the time I am content and know God has a plan for me whether or not I ever have a dating relationship that leads to marriage.
 
Don’t worry about it. My sister never dated until she was about 30, and my brother-in-law is about 35 and has never dated. My best friend from childhood has never dated anyone and she’s nearly 40, and almost all of my college friends had never dated until they were over 18. And, this was not a conservative, religious crowd either… quite the opposite in fact. They are also quite normal people. Yes, a lot of people date in high school, and the media protrays that as the normal thing. But, a lot of people don’t date until they are older, and this is also quite normal. Actually, I think dating is easier after high school anyway, becasue you are often exposed to a much larger group of people (like in college, for example) instead of being divided into small high school cliques. So, it is easier to find people who are more like you.
 
I never dated in school either. At the time I didn’t know why, but a few years later I remember looking at a crowd of teen boys and thinking, “Oh, that’s why I never dated in high school.” Now I see that on some level, even back then, I recognized that the only satisfying relationship for me would be one that at least had the potential to end in Marriage, and high school boys weren’t marriage material. Perhaps you feel the same way. Perhaps you want a mature relationship and not a high school relationship.
 
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