NFP Pregnancy Prevention Survey:

[jilly4ski]

Okay, your not getting it.

I’m done.

I think the problem is that 3 days is not recommended in any method (even symptom based) in order to achieve any sort of statistical success rate close to the 90% rate. Since sperm can live up to 5 days in fertile mucus before ovulation, it is not “safe” up to 5 days before ovulation. All symptom based methods also instruct those who are trying to abstain that they must wait peak day plus 4 (evening of the 4th day is safe). To watch for double or late ovulation. So that is 9 days right there.

I have a very regular cycle when not postpartum, and I got pregnant dtd 5 days before I ovulated and I ovulated a few days early. We knew we were fertile however, so it was not a failure of method, we decided to be open to a baby both times we got pregnant.

 

[CrimsonCatholic]

No, you’re not getting it. I’d put my money on your wife being pregnant within a year. I’m done too. The only reason that I have pursued this conversation is so that anybody looking for information on NFP, with serious reason to avoid, doesn’t mistakenly believe that they can effectively use NFP with only three days of abstaining. This can be a life and death matter for some people.

A year so far, and nadda, and year later and I bet nadda.

This can be life or death, so you need to use the best method for you and your wife with NFP.

3 days is on the low side, it can be greater as I have mentioned, it really depends on a lot of factors… as again I have mentioned.

So remember that, when you are sharing YOUR opinion and misinformation.

Thank you!

 

[Inthemountains]

A year so far, and nadda, and year later and I bet nadda.

This can be life or death, so you need to use the best method for you and your wife with NFP.

3 days is on the low side, it can be greater as I have mentioned, it really depends on a lot of factors… as again I have mentioned.

So remember that, when you are sharing YOUR opinion and misinformation.

Thank you!

HOLY COW!!! I am not giving my opinion or misinformation. It doesn’t depend on “a lot of factors”. NFP is actually quite scientific. A couple can achieve a 95%-98% efficacy rate with NFP, depending on method, but not with only three days of abstaining.

 

[cecilia97]

HOLY COW!!! I am not giving my opinion or misinformation. It doesn’t depend on “a lot of factors”. NFP is actually quite scientific. A couple can achieve a 95%-98% efficacy rate with NFP, depending on method, but not with only three days of abstaining.

The efficacy rates are in the aggregate, though. For this particular couple, it might be working. In any clinical study, there are likely to be outliers on each end of the average range. I never heard Crimson say it would work that way for everyone.

 

[CrimsonCatholic]

The efficacy rates are in the aggregate, though. For this particular couple, it might be working. In any clinical study, there are likely to be outliers on each end of the average range. I never heard Crimson say it would work that way for everyone.

Thank you!!!

That is what I have been trying to say. I have shared our expereice and methods, but again… Couples need to do there own methods as well that may not be what we are practicing. Couples really have to do homework on this, its different for every couple.

I hope it works out for them though!

Thank you.

 

[kristleful]

Thank you!!!

That is what I have been trying to say. I have shared our expereice and methods, but again… Couples need to do there own methods as well that may not be what we are practicing. Couples really have to do homework on this, its different for every couple.

I hope it works out for them though!

Thank you.

I totally get what you’ve been trying to say, too. I think that it is hard for some people to accept that NFP is easy for some, if it is difficult for them. It’s a tough situation for a lot of people, but for many others, it is helpful and relatively easy. I think the thing to keep in mind is that if you are determined to prevent a baby, the effectiveness of NFP is kind of irrelevant, unless you want to completely abstain. As faithful Catholics, we don’t have the option of anything other than NFP or completely abstaining, so if you feel you must prevent a baby, find the method of NFP that works best for you! Then stop worrying and leave the rest up to God. If He allows your NFP to “fail,” then He wants you to receive a baby and see what a precious gift He has for you.

My concern for the OP is that he suggests a “failure” in preventing pregnancy would mean a failure of the “livelihood of his relationship.” This indicates to me an unreadiness for marriage. We are called to enter marriage with an openness to life, and this sounds like anything but that. If a baby would mess up or ruin your marriage, then it seems there should not be a marriage yet. In my opinion, it would be prudent for a couple to find the financial means to be able to provide for a possible child, before getting married and moving in together. Then there wouldn’t be such a fear of having a child one can’t support! We can’t forget the true meaning of marriage:

“The matrimonial covenant, by which a man and a woman establish between themselves a partnership of the whole of life, is by its nature ordered toward the good of the spouses AND the procreation and education of offspring…” CC, 1601.

 

[agapewolf]

Even with women who have the exact clockwork regular cycles WILL DEFINITELY have either early ovulation or delayed due to stress or illness at some point. That is God designed— to delay ovulation so that conception doesn’t happen while stressed. A simple thing like diet can change a cycle.

Calendar method might work for awhile, but at some point, it won’t match the cycle.

 

[Augusta_Sans]

I am a young Christian who has recently become engaged and who wishes to enjoy the sensual blessings of marriage **WITH OUT **jeapordizing the livelihood of our relationship due to an unwanted pregnancy that we can neither support or afford, so honesty in the survey is apreciated. Political or religious agendas or biases are not worth the livelihood of our relationship. Thank you.

Oh I was once like you, and oh how my marriage suffered during the first couple years (including separation, and affair, and a divorce before we eventually reconciled and embraced the fullness of our sacramental marriage). Honestly, living in constant fear of an “unwanted pregnancy” (a fear which is just as real whether on birth control or practicing NFP!) jeopardizes a marriage more than abstaining from sex a few days each month.

I encourage you to wait to get married until you are ready to honestly answer YES! when asked if you will lovingly accept children from God.

 

[rmartensjr]

…but still practice sexual intercourse in the** ABSENSE **of artificial contraception and/or pulling out before ejaculation.

I have read the entire post and am truly suprised that no one noted that “coitus interuptus” is not allowed by the Church.

 

[Syri]

Okay, your not getting it.

I’m done.

Sperm can live up to five days in good conditions.

Method, disproven

 

[dulcissima]

I can’t participate in your poll, because there are no options there for me.

I was married and am now divorced. Four children, all conceived while using artificial birth control.

Don’t think that it works any better than NFP at avoiding pregnancy. In fact, I think NFP might be better than ABC because it takes into consideration each and every unique cycle.

Contraception does bring about the wrong mindset in a marriage though. It’s kind of like a stepping stone to more and more marital problems. I would advise you to not enter into marriage with that mindset.

 

[mexilad]

Just wanted to point out that God helps those who helps themselves is not in the BIBLE anywhere.

You may discern that from your reading, but I personally believe God helps those who love and follow His word, the Church and what it teaches.

I believe it comes out of Aesop’s fables.

 

[twoangels]

Not true. As West puts it… he can go be “spontaneous” on the piano never having had a lesson and just bang on it, or someone who has trained and practiced for years can be spontaneous and play beautiful music.

3/4 of the month are infertile,…so when avoiding pregnancy, you have 3/4 of the month to be spontaneous.

Not true? I was speaking from my own experience. Most women’s cycles are shorter than 30 days. A woman can still be experiencing a healthy cycle even when her cycle is only 25 days apart. All medium and heavy flow days as well as irregular bleeding are considered fertile. Then there is how common place it is for women to deal with cycle irregularities that can give the woman premenstrual spotting, tail end spotting, crazy mucus patterns. And this doesn’t at all go into the woman having a decreased libido when she’s infertile.

I’m completely pro-NFP and anti-contraceptive, but NFP is not glamourous and in my experience abstaining is far easier than looking at your chart, seeing that you’re infertile and feeling the pressure to have sex now. In my experience, the libido is linked to fertility. Men want sex all the time because their fertile all the time. A woman’s libido follows her fertility swings. So when she’s most fertile, she’s interested. When she’s infertile, it takes work to get her interested and when you’re new to it, that isn’t easy to do. Moreover the pressure to have sex works completely against you. It can be done, but its harder to do than it is to abstain.

 

[twoangels]

None of that addresses their “myth”, that people who do not practice NFP have sex more often.

Also, to the poster who says they only abstain for 3 days per cycle - you’re doing it wrong. I’m glad it’s working out for you, but there is no NFP-to-avoid method that can be reliable with two healthy individuals abstaining only 3 days per month.

In my training with NFP, I’d agree with this. According to Creighton, all days of moderate to heavy flow are considered fertile (the woman’s cycle). Granted, I don’t know who would want to have sex during moderate to heavy days. If the woman only has one fertile mucus day, the next three days are all considered fertile even without peak mucus. The couple than can be intimate at the end of the 4th day where peak mucus has not shown up.

 

[midori]

It won’t let me vote, but my two cents…

I did a very mild form of NFP— primarily observation of CM and paying attention to my own hormonal cycles, but no temping or charting— for the first nine and a half years of marriage. Then we finally decided that if we were going to have children, we really needed to get on the ball. I used the same knowledge I’d previously used to avoid— and a healthy dose of prayer— and we conceived DS#1 two months later.

It requires discipline, but it also forces you to pay attention and be in tune with your body’s own personal rhythms and cycles. And I think those are both very positive things.

 

[PaulBennett24]

God would not allow you to have more children then you can support or afford so i dont see the point in using nfp for that reason. Just because you wont have enough money to spend on materialistic things isnt a good reason to use nfp. God would not allow you to concieve children that he knew would cause serious problems that you could not get through.

But then God does not kill what He creates. What He creates is created. He dies not say, “Woops”, and snuff it out if He “knew you weren’t supposed to concieve that child”.

 

[aloe]

NFP has been working for us over the years. We typically observe the signs of temp, charting, CM, cervical position. For a bit we didn’t observe all the signs together as strictly but my cycles are regular enough we were still able to avoid using NFP based on our past data, cycle awareness, and CM. NFP is also much healthier for our relationship and my body long term vs being on artificial hormones for years on end. NFP has worked for us over a long period of time but one person doesn’t hold all of the information; both of us learned about charting and what certain weeks meant what and make decisions based on the data.

 

[ryecroft]

By the time I got to this one, the poll was closed - not sure why but glad that I can answer anyway. Had I been able to answer, I would have answered that no it didn’t really work for my husband and I as far as trying to prevent getting pregnant (nor for my best friend who just finished with her 2nd oops pregnancy - no the child is not an oops - rather, finding out that she was pregnant was definitely the oops part).
Our “oopses” were not from not following the method - we went to more than one class, and would ask questions and even had them checked by authoritative people (yes, the institute on more than one occaision)- trying to understand. With all of this experience, this is what I would tell you - if you have any health concerns or problems like I do (kidney disease and problems since I was very young with my menses)- then prior to ‘practicing’ the method, seriously check with the Pope Paul Institute and make sure you have a doctor familiar with NFP practices. We were told the ‘reasons’ we followed all the rules and still got pregnant while trying not to conceive was that I must have had a 2nd ovulation during the month or that “God must have just wanted you to be pregnant…” - (or my personal favourite, ‘you must have not charted correctly…’ this is the one thing that really got me was that after taking all precautions, and even coming on here to try to understand what had happened, I would be told over and over that I must have done something to mess up - missed something not charted correctly, or given into my partner when we shouldn’t have been together - (according to our charting, we didn’t ever do this - if anything I was overly protective)-
No so I don’t sound like I’m on just a rant, I will say one thing that did help us and a friend of mine (before we wound up back on the pill for health reasons)- is using one of the fertility monitors - but I would highly reccomend one that checks your vaginal fluid as well as your saliva - it may be 2-300 but if you really need to put off having a child and want to use NFP, I would say that it’s a bargain compared with getting pregnant when you’re trying to keep from getting pregnant)
I really hope this works out for you. There are a good deal of people on here that this works for - but IMHO, NFP does NOT work for EVERYONE - regardless of how many classes you take or how well you chart. Make sure your spouse realizes that while you may see numbers touted that say it works 99.7% of the time, realize that this number is used with conditions - ‘when used correctly’ or ‘typical use’- (personally, I wish it said ‘when used perfectly’) - otherwise you have at least a 20-25% failure rate (depending on which study you look at - the Catholic one’s will generally say a lower number the others a higher number -
Please also understand that NFP is not easy (not that I’m implying anyone said it was) - and that the time around when you ovulate is often the time you will most want to be ‘active’ with your spouse. When we were trying to avoid conception, I must say that thinking about ‘if we have sex now, this time next year it’s very likely I’ll be changing diapers’ was enough to help squelch my desire. Other couples use other methods to get them through that time.
Please understand, I am not saying that NFP doesn’t work - I’m just trying to give you an idea of our experiences while attempting to use NFP.
God Bless you and Good luck - above all, pray about this -
Rye

just a thought - remember the only way you find out if NFP ‘didn’t work’ or ‘failed’ for you is if your wife winds up pregnant.

 

[PaulBennett24]

By the time I got to this one, the poll was closed - not sure why but glad that I can answer anyway. Had I been able to answer, I would have answered that no it didn’t really work for my husband and I as far as trying to prevent getting pregnant (nor for my best friend who just finished with her 2nd oops pregnancy - no the child is not an oops - rather, finding out that she was pregnant was definitely the oops part).
Our “oopses” were not from not following the method - we went to more than one class, and would ask questions and even had them checked by authoritative people (yes, the institute on more than one occaision)- trying to understand. With all of this experience, this is what I would tell you - if you have any health concerns or problems like I do (kidney disease and problems since I was very young with my menses)- then prior to ‘practicing’ the method, seriously check with the Pope Paul Institute and make sure you have a doctor familiar with NFP practices. We were told the ‘reasons’ we followed all the rules and still got pregnant while trying not to conceive was that I must have had a 2nd ovulation during the month or that “God must have just wanted you to be pregnant…” - (or my personal favourite, ‘you must have not charted correctly…’ this is the one thing that really got me was that after taking all precautions, and even coming on here to try to understand what had happened, I would be told over and over that I must have done something to mess up - missed something not charted correctly, or given into my partner when we shouldn’t have been together - (according to our charting, we didn’t ever do this - if anything I was overly protective)-
No so I don’t sound like I’m on just a rant, I will say one thing that did help us and a friend of mine (before we wound up back on the pill for health reasons)- is using one of the fertility monitors - but I would highly reccomend one that checks your vaginal fluid as well as your saliva - it may be 2-300 but if you really need to put off having a child and want to use NFP, I would say that it’s a bargain compared with getting pregnant when you’re trying to keep from getting pregnant)
I really hope this works out for you. There are a good deal of people on here that this works for - but IMHO, NFP does NOT work for EVERYONE - regardless of how many classes you take or how well you chart. Make sure your spouse realizes that while you may see numbers touted that say it works 99.7% of the time, realize that this number is used with conditions - ‘when used correctly’ or ‘typical use’- (personally, I wish it said ‘when used perfectly’) - otherwise you have at least a 20-25% failure rate (depending on which study you look at - the Catholic one’s will generally say a lower number the others a higher number -
Please also understand that NFP is not easy (not that I’m implying anyone said it was) - and that the time around when you ovulate is often the time you will most want to be ‘active’ with your spouse. When we were trying to avoid conception, I must say that thinking about ‘if we have sex now, this time next year it’s very likely I’ll be changing diapers’ was enough to help squelch my desire. Other couples use other methods to get them through that time.
Please understand, I am not saying that NFP doesn’t work - I’m just trying to give you an idea of our experiences while attempting to use NFP.
God Bless you and Good luck - above all, pray about this -
Rye

just a thought - remember the only way you find out if NFP ‘didn’t work’ or ‘failed’ for you is if your wife winds up pregnant.

What happened to couples just NOT having sex and practicing abstinence rather than just having sex to “show love” and out of fertility to “avoid pregnancy”? This idea to have sex out of fertility to avoid pregnancy is the exact same thinking behind the pro abort crowd.

 

[PaulBennett24]

By the time I got to this one, the poll was closed - not sure why but glad that I can answer anyway. Had I been able to answer, I would have answered that no it didn’t really work for my husband and I as far as trying to prevent getting pregnant (nor for my best friend who just finished with her 2nd oops pregnancy - no the child is not an oops - rather, finding out that she was pregnant was definitely the oops part).
Our “oopses” were not from not following the method - we went to more than one class, and would ask questions and even had them checked by authoritative people (yes, the institute on more than one occaision)- trying to understand. With all of this experience, this is what I would tell you - if you have any health concerns or problems like I do (kidney disease and problems since I was very young with my menses)- then prior to ‘practicing’ the method, seriously check with the Pope Paul Institute and make sure you have a doctor familiar with NFP practices. We were told the ‘reasons’ we followed all the rules and still got pregnant while trying not to conceive was that I must have had a 2nd ovulation during the month or that “God must have just wanted you to be pregnant…” - (or my personal favourite, ‘you must have not charted correctly…’ this is the one thing that really got me was that after taking all precautions, and even coming on here to try to understand what had happened, I would be told over and over that I must have done something to mess up - missed something not charted correctly, or given into my partner when we shouldn’t have been together - (according to our charting, we didn’t ever do this - if anything I was overly protective)-
No so I don’t sound like I’m on just a rant, I will say one thing that did help us and a friend of mine (before we wound up back on the pill for health reasons)- is using one of the fertility monitors - but I would highly reccomend one that checks your vaginal fluid as well as your saliva - it may be 2-300 but if you really need to put off having a child and want to use NFP, I would say that it’s a bargain compared with getting pregnant when you’re trying to keep from getting pregnant)
I really hope this works out for you. There are a good deal of people on here that this works for - but IMHO, NFP does NOT work for EVERYONE - regardless of how many classes you take or how well you chart. Make sure your spouse realizes that while you may see numbers touted that say it works 99.7% of the time, realize that this number is used with conditions - ‘when used correctly’ or ‘typical use’- (personally, I wish it said ‘when used perfectly’) - otherwise you have at least a 20-25% failure rate (depending on which study you look at - the Catholic one’s will generally say a lower number the others a higher number -
Please also understand that NFP is not easy (not that I’m implying anyone said it was) - and that the time around when you ovulate is often the time you will most want to be ‘active’ with your spouse. When we were trying to avoid conception, I must say that thinking about ‘if we have sex now, this time next year it’s very likely I’ll be changing diapers’ was enough to help squelch my desire. Other couples use other methods to get them through that time.
Please understand, I am not saying that NFP doesn’t work - I’m just trying to give you an idea of our experiences while attempting to use NFP.
God Bless you and Good luck - above all, pray about this -
Rye

just a thought - remember the only way you find out if NFP ‘didn’t work’ or ‘failed’ for you is if your wife winds up pregnant.

if your wife “winds up pregnant”, you need to change your thinking and see the child conceived in the pregnancy as a gift from God. All human life is a gift, not a curse and DEFINITELY NOT a “cancer” as planned murderhood would have you believe.