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chrisetree
Guest
i am not happy at mass. I dont really know why, exactly. I pretty much feel like I warm a pew. Should I quit?
- Status
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Sparticus
Guest
Don’t feel left out. I have felt the same way. The church I go to has installed a video screen. They did away with any missalettes. And place the psalms and singing material on this screen. Parents allow their kids to stand on pews, back of pews, play with toys or whatever.
They clap after church. As if it is some sort of entertainment. The choir has a DRUMMER!
When you are at your lowest is when you might just be getting the most out of it and become closer to Christ. It may be God’s way “challenging” you. In trying to defeat what is making not want to attend will make you stronger. You are special and God has plan for you.
They clap after church. As if it is some sort of entertainment. The choir has a DRUMMER!
When you are at your lowest is when you might just be getting the most out of it and become closer to Christ. It may be God’s way “challenging” you. In trying to defeat what is making not want to attend will make you stronger. You are special and God has plan for you.
P
puzzleannie
Guest
sure, if you don’t feel good don’t do it. If you don’t feel happy in your marriage, leave. If you don’t feel happy in your job, leave. I am of course being facetious.
Your subjective feelings have absolutely nothing to do with either the quality of your worship, the benefit of the Mass, the effect of the sacrament of the Eucharist, or your obligation to be there. You don’t need to be happy you need to be there. If you really don’t know why you are unhappy simply ask the Lord to tell you what he wants you to know about your attitude toward thanking him for his sacrifice on your behalf.
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thomas_jd
Guest
No… Do all you can to Persevere!
J
Julian0404
Guest
This Lent, we should make a commitment to learn our faith more fully.
In 1997, at the request of Bishop William Weigand, then the bishop of the Diocese of Sacramento, California, Fr. John Corapi created and produced an audio and video series based on his live presentations to the people of the Diocese of Sacramento on the Catechism of the Catholic Church. This Lent, devote time each day, to achieve a deeper understanding of our faith. This series usually sells for $299, but will be half price (just $149) through March 31st. Click here to view the schedule we created to assist you in achieving your goal.
No, you should not quit, you should go to www.fathercorapi.com and purchase the above CD series, which is a synopsis of the CCC, and after devoting 1 hr each day to a tape, at the end of Lent, you will know the Catholic faith like you have never known it before, and you will no longer be a bench warmer, but a kneeler warmer.
Learn your faith, from Father Corapi
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choosyone
Guest
when I was exploring the faith, I went to several churches and did not have a positive expereince. Then I went to a smaller parish, not a mega one, and really felt welcome. My church was built in 1893 and has the original pews. On days when I do not feel fully present with the Mass, I am reminded of all the others that have sat in the same spot, coming to receive grace, their ups and downs, the homilies that have struck a personal chord, and those that did not. It grounds me, it helps me to grow toward the faith. I also ask the ones that have sat in that seat to pray for me as I pray for their soul in pergatory. It keeps me linked in.
If this does not work, maybe another church will work better. I toured different parishes in my diocese to find the best fit.
If this does not work, maybe another church will work better. I toured different parishes in my diocese to find the best fit.
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Di_bear
Guest
Try some other churches. Seriously. You might find a community that is a better fit. It’s amazing how one can experience spiritual dryness at one parish, and then feel enlightened at another.
While we’re on the topic, I’ve talked with a couple of priests about spiritual dryness. I just stopped getting anything from Mass and prayer. Do some research on the topic, and you’ll find it quite interesting. Apparently, it is the result of progress in prayer, but it is also a bit of a plateau that one must work through.
While we’re on the topic, I’ve talked with a couple of priests about spiritual dryness. I just stopped getting anything from Mass and prayer. Do some research on the topic, and you’ll find it quite interesting. Apparently, it is the result of progress in prayer, but it is also a bit of a plateau that one must work through.
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MaryJoanRuth
Guest
Find a different church. You need to be happy and comfortable with the church to get the most out of the mass. Just a case of different strokes for different folks. Worked for me. Good Luck and God bless.
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ConstantineTG
Guest
Try going to an Eastern Liturgy, look for Byzantine Catholic parishes or even from other Rites. The Eastern Liturgy might suit you better.
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catsrus
Guest
No. You should not quit. God will not quit you so please do not quit Him.
I too, was beginning to feel very unhappy at the couple of parishes I was attending. I prayed so much over this and one day, the answer came to me - I know by The HS.
I began going to the EF and am now, once again flooded with joy just by walking in the door.
Pray constantly for God to direct you in this matter, listen carfully and the answer you need will be given.
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Abundant
Guest
This morning, I went to Reconciliation at my parish. There was a long line in front of me so I read through a little booklet called “Making a Better Confession.” In it, there were a few questions that I think pertain to you:
-Am I faithful to Mass (CCC 1341-44, 2177-82)
Confess this attitude and instances of it.
-Am I going to Mass or saying my prayers as a duty and no more? Why do I give God the bare minimum?
Confess this attitude.
-When I am distracted at Mass is it because I am making other things more important to me than God?
If so, confess–not just the distractions, but the cause.
When there is something standing between you and God…it is more than likely sin! Go to adoration, take some time to examine your conscience, go to mass really early when not many people are there. Ask God to show you where you are failing and reveal Himself to you. Just be prepared – it’s a powerful prayer!!
-Am I faithful to Mass (CCC 1341-44, 2177-82)
Confess this attitude and instances of it.
-Am I going to Mass or saying my prayers as a duty and no more? Why do I give God the bare minimum?
Confess this attitude.
-When I am distracted at Mass is it because I am making other things more important to me than God?
If so, confess–not just the distractions, but the cause.
When there is something standing between you and God…it is more than likely sin! Go to adoration, take some time to examine your conscience, go to mass really early when not many people are there. Ask God to show you where you are failing and reveal Himself to you. Just be prepared – it’s a powerful prayer!!
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laszlo
Guest
The name of your feeling is spiritual dryness. St Teresa of Avila had it for years, and many others too. You are not alone. One attend the mass not for feel God, but to participate in the sacrifice of Christ.
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dad_o_six
Guest
Don’t know your complete reasons for posting, but I could have written what you wrote a year ago. I may get banned for saying this, but almost a year ago I left the post-conciliar church and started attending SSPX.
About a month ago, while walking the dog, I ran into one of the lay leaders of my old parish and the head of the steering committee that was charged with a recent parish re-structuring (they made 5 churches into 1 as the religious vocations are dwindling). This lady asked where my family had been.
I told her we were attending SSPX about an hour away.
She didn’t react, but commented, “Yeah, attendance is way down,” then she asked, “What do we have to do to get people to come back to [name of church omitted]?”
She asked and I tried to be brief. Basically, I said that the mainline Protestant churches are down to 8% of their peak attendance in the 1950s. Since the modern Catholic church is becoming increasingly like the Protestant church (to my great pleasure she nodded in agreement), it follows logically that our numbers would also be experiencing a similar decline. My conclusion is that Catholic Church should focus on Her distinctively Catholic elements. A rise in attendance would logically follow.
To further clarify, this lady’s question was basically a marketing question. This may sound crude to some, but the truth is the truth. More or less, she asked something like, "How to we get more customers back to fly Brand X airlines? And my response was that a marketing scheme like, “Come fly Brand X. We’re just like everybody else,” would be ineffective.
P.S. I’m not necessarily suggesting you go to SSPX, and I hope I didn’t hijack your post. We had simply exhausted all of our options and took a leap. I suspect you probably haven’t exhausted all your options, yet.
About a month ago, while walking the dog, I ran into one of the lay leaders of my old parish and the head of the steering committee that was charged with a recent parish re-structuring (they made 5 churches into 1 as the religious vocations are dwindling). This lady asked where my family had been.
I told her we were attending SSPX about an hour away.
She didn’t react, but commented, “Yeah, attendance is way down,” then she asked, “What do we have to do to get people to come back to [name of church omitted]?”
She asked and I tried to be brief. Basically, I said that the mainline Protestant churches are down to 8% of their peak attendance in the 1950s. Since the modern Catholic church is becoming increasingly like the Protestant church (to my great pleasure she nodded in agreement), it follows logically that our numbers would also be experiencing a similar decline. My conclusion is that Catholic Church should focus on Her distinctively Catholic elements. A rise in attendance would logically follow.
To further clarify, this lady’s question was basically a marketing question. This may sound crude to some, but the truth is the truth. More or less, she asked something like, "How to we get more customers back to fly Brand X airlines? And my response was that a marketing scheme like, “Come fly Brand X. We’re just like everybody else,” would be ineffective.
P.S. I’m not necessarily suggesting you go to SSPX, and I hope I didn’t hijack your post. We had simply exhausted all of our options and took a leap. I suspect you probably haven’t exhausted all your options, yet.
D
dad_o_six
Guest
It occurs to me that my marketing analogy was flawed, or perhaps more telling. What if the Catholic church was the only “airline” that could get you to your intended destination, heaven? What if all the other “airlines,” i.e. churches, were just a bunch of hype? Sound radical? Sound not politically correct? Well, that’s just what the church taught for 2000 years. I’ve read and re-read the new Catechism on this, and I think the church still teaches this, sort of. It’s all hidden under that fuzzy new math.
Anyhow, if you were clearly taught that the Catholic church were your only means to salvation and if your priest actually acted like it, then would you still feel like you were warming the pew? Or does everyone just go to heaven anyway, so what’s the point?
Anyhow, if you were clearly taught that the Catholic church were your only means to salvation and if your priest actually acted like it, then would you still feel like you were warming the pew? Or does everyone just go to heaven anyway, so what’s the point?
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Amiciel
Guest
Chrisetree, Many of us can identify with your experience. Note though that participating in the Sunday Mass is an obligation we have. It cannot be an optional activity because the Eucharist is our source of eternal life. Staying away from the Eucharist will starve your spiritual life.
Perhaps what you are going through is ‘spiritual dryness’, in which case, there is all the more reason for you to keep coming to Holy Mass, where you will receive the graces necessary to carry you through this trying time.
Or you may be experiencing a temptation that is trying to pull you away from the Eucharist. If this is the case, it would help to remember that the Eucharist is a precious and indispensable gift which the Lord Jesus gave us at the price of going through a horrific death for us. Just unite your discomfort to the sufferings of Jesus - and trust Him to take care of you.
Sometimes, too, one’s understanding of the Eucharist may be incomplete. As a result, one’s participation is confined to the dialogue and external movements of the Holy Mass. In this case, one’s encounter with the Lord may remain on the superficial level, or perhaps, no encounter at all may occur.
To truly encounter the Lord during the Mass, one needs to enter into the very nature of the mysteries that the Mass brings us. This can only happen if we are acquainted with the various mysteries that are re-presented to us by the Mass and therefore we find meaning in the Mass.
If the 3rd scenario is your case, reading and familiarizing yourself with the nature of the Mass will enable you to find solace, peace and a different kind of joy as you encounter the Lord in the mysteries embedded in the Mass.
Whatever your case is, pray to the Holy Spirit for guidance AND keep going to Holy Mass.
Perhaps what you are going through is ‘spiritual dryness’, in which case, there is all the more reason for you to keep coming to Holy Mass, where you will receive the graces necessary to carry you through this trying time.
Or you may be experiencing a temptation that is trying to pull you away from the Eucharist. If this is the case, it would help to remember that the Eucharist is a precious and indispensable gift which the Lord Jesus gave us at the price of going through a horrific death for us. Just unite your discomfort to the sufferings of Jesus - and trust Him to take care of you.
Sometimes, too, one’s understanding of the Eucharist may be incomplete. As a result, one’s participation is confined to the dialogue and external movements of the Holy Mass. In this case, one’s encounter with the Lord may remain on the superficial level, or perhaps, no encounter at all may occur.
To truly encounter the Lord during the Mass, one needs to enter into the very nature of the mysteries that the Mass brings us. This can only happen if we are acquainted with the various mysteries that are re-presented to us by the Mass and therefore we find meaning in the Mass.
If the 3rd scenario is your case, reading and familiarizing yourself with the nature of the Mass will enable you to find solace, peace and a different kind of joy as you encounter the Lord in the mysteries embedded in the Mass.
Whatever your case is, pray to the Holy Spirit for guidance AND keep going to Holy Mass.
D
dad_o_six
Guest
It occurs to me that the words of the original post presuppose the answer you were looking for. By choosing the phrase, “warming the pew,” you slightly transformed a sports or baseball metaphor, “warming the bench.” In sports, I’ve sat on the bench plenty, and to me nothing is more miserable.
But you used the analogy in referring to your attendance at the Catholic church. When it comes to the modern Catholic church, the only person holding you back from actually participating is you. You need only to raise your hand to become a lector, extraordinary minister (okay, I’m holding my nose saying it), or usher. Better yet, you could volunteer to make coffee (always the best job) or to wash dishes or to organize the food or clothing pantries. And so forth. The possibilities are endless.
Of course, many of these positions in the traditional liturgies are actually the priest’s job. But the point remains that you could be of some service to others.
Okay, I can’t resist a little jab, mostly because it’s kind of funny, I think. The modern Catholic Church seems a little like T-ball. Everyone gets to play. No matter how short or far you hit the ball, you only take one base. Everyone gets to run all the bases. You can use your own pink bat and glove, even if you are a boy. It doesn’t really matter if you wear your glove on the wrong hand. And at the end of the season, everyone gets a trophy.
I do hope you find your way.
But you used the analogy in referring to your attendance at the Catholic church. When it comes to the modern Catholic church, the only person holding you back from actually participating is you. You need only to raise your hand to become a lector, extraordinary minister (okay, I’m holding my nose saying it), or usher. Better yet, you could volunteer to make coffee (always the best job) or to wash dishes or to organize the food or clothing pantries. And so forth. The possibilities are endless.
Of course, many of these positions in the traditional liturgies are actually the priest’s job. But the point remains that you could be of some service to others.
Okay, I can’t resist a little jab, mostly because it’s kind of funny, I think. The modern Catholic Church seems a little like T-ball. Everyone gets to play. No matter how short or far you hit the ball, you only take one base. Everyone gets to run all the bases. You can use your own pink bat and glove, even if you are a boy. It doesn’t really matter if you wear your glove on the wrong hand. And at the end of the season, everyone gets a trophy.
I do hope you find your way.
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chrisetree
Guest
Dad o six…we are all God’s children. If he is going to condemn protestants into hell for not being catholic, then I don’t need to go to heaven and be with a God like that.
And here is an FYI for you…SSPX is classified as a SCHISM church. ie…NOT approved.
Guess who is playing with fire?
And here is an FYI for you…SSPX is classified as a SCHISM church. ie…NOT approved.
Guess who is playing with fire?
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dad_o_six
Guest
SSPX is not in schism, but is considered in irregular status. The ex-communications of the bishops have been lifted. I researched the history and I’m comfortable with the decision. Frankly, I just reached the point where I asked, “Where else could I go?” Tried some of the traditional fair that the diocese and neighboring diocese were offering. Serious concerns. I am sure that others disagree. But I have yet to hear anyone argue against SSPX on any grounds other than an authoritative argument, the lowest form of rhetoric.
As far as Protestants and going to hell, well that may be an issue for deduction, but ultimately not my job to decide. But I did base my previous statement on Catholic dogma, which by the way, cannot be changed. I do know this: If you believe something, you also don’t believe the alternative views. If I believe that 2+4=6, then I don’t believe it’s equal to 7. Or, if I say the shirt I’m wearing is green, I’m also saying it’s not red. To be a Catholic is also not to be a Protestant. The first thing the Protestants did was to eliminate the sacraments, starting with confession. This has led to an erosion of the Faith that was prevalent in, for example, in Nietzche’s time and place. Today, the sluffing away of the sacramental belief, for example marriage, is ubiquitous and has led to the anything goes culture in which we live.
For me, the final straw with the modern church was when one of our elders laughed at me because I made our 6 year old daughter genuflect before the tabernacle. (This occupant of an honored seat at the synagogue allows her own grandchildren to play on the alter and ring the bells. Not only is this irreverent, but it makes it quite difficult to pray after Mass). Perhaps these people do believe in the real presence of Christ, but I could not in good conscience continue going to a Mass where I had serious doubts the clergy or the servers had anything like a belief in the real presence.
I suspect that you are only capable of hearing my anger, but there is so much more that has come in the wake of this decision. I am really quite grateful for the hypocrisy and fuzzy-headed thinking, the bad music and the irreverence. It led me to something better, much better. Today, I have a passion for the Faith. And that’s a whole lot better than apathy.
As far as Protestants and going to hell, well that may be an issue for deduction, but ultimately not my job to decide. But I did base my previous statement on Catholic dogma, which by the way, cannot be changed. I do know this: If you believe something, you also don’t believe the alternative views. If I believe that 2+4=6, then I don’t believe it’s equal to 7. Or, if I say the shirt I’m wearing is green, I’m also saying it’s not red. To be a Catholic is also not to be a Protestant. The first thing the Protestants did was to eliminate the sacraments, starting with confession. This has led to an erosion of the Faith that was prevalent in, for example, in Nietzche’s time and place. Today, the sluffing away of the sacramental belief, for example marriage, is ubiquitous and has led to the anything goes culture in which we live.
For me, the final straw with the modern church was when one of our elders laughed at me because I made our 6 year old daughter genuflect before the tabernacle. (This occupant of an honored seat at the synagogue allows her own grandchildren to play on the alter and ring the bells. Not only is this irreverent, but it makes it quite difficult to pray after Mass). Perhaps these people do believe in the real presence of Christ, but I could not in good conscience continue going to a Mass where I had serious doubts the clergy or the servers had anything like a belief in the real presence.
I suspect that you are only capable of hearing my anger, but there is so much more that has come in the wake of this decision. I am really quite grateful for the hypocrisy and fuzzy-headed thinking, the bad music and the irreverence. It led me to something better, much better. Today, I have a passion for the Faith. And that’s a whole lot better than apathy.
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chrisetree
Guest
Bottom line …YOU are not in full communion with the church that christ started.
SSPX are not in full communion with the RCC. Apparently that does not bother you.
And in case you did not know, the RCC recognizes a protestant baptism. So apparently they must count just a little. NOT going straight to hell because they happen to not be catholic.
I can empahthize with not being happy at church. I recently attended an Assembly of God service. I enjoyed it very much!
Have a nice day!
SSPX are not in full communion with the RCC. Apparently that does not bother you.
And in case you did not know, the RCC recognizes a protestant baptism. So apparently they must count just a little. NOT going straight to hell because they happen to not be catholic.
I can empahthize with not being happy at church. I recently attended an Assembly of God service. I enjoyed it very much!
Have a nice day!
V
vsedriver
Guest
Jesus was not happy at his crucifixion. He didn’t leave. Offer up your sadness for Christ’s suffering.
the more you give of yourself to God the more you will get back.
- Status