Nursing Mothers

[asquared]

My daughters I am proud to say are nursing mothers, when they were babies it was only us hippie earth mother types who did it. Now they have lactation consultants, who have been invaluable help to new mothers. God came up with the original design, and it has never been improved upon. This very peculiar culture we live in, with its breast fetish, is the only one that has this hang-up about women nursing in public. Every mall in America prominently displays women’s underwear, frontal nudity has become routine in all but G-rated movies, but what is okay to sell a product is somehow wrong to feed a baby.

I would suggest that someone who is offended by the sight of a nursing mother put your tongue back in your mouth and look elsewhere. Why aren’t you concentrating on the sermon and the ritual, why are you looking around at everybody else? Would you rather hear the baby scream, or force the mom to stay away from Mass for a year? Of course, a truly hospitable parish, one fully committed to pro-life, pro-babies, anti-contraception would of course have a cry room with space set aside for just this purpose.

With a little practice, and the newly designed clothing as mentioned above, any mother can nurse discreetly and comfortably in public. If God had wanted babies to drink from bottles women would have two of them attached to their collar bones. The suggestion that we repair to the bathroom to feed the baby is ludicrous, as the previous post suggested, we do not eat in a bathroom. We do, however, change diapers there, not in the pew. Where would you suggest mama sit while baby is nursing, on the toilet?

 

[WhiteDove]

http://www.breastfeeding.co.uk/postcards/images/card3.jpg

 

[Catholic4aReasn]

I was surprised to see that several here DID nurse at Mass. I guess I just always nursed my kids right before we left the house and then they wouldn’t be hungry during Mass. To be honest, it’s nothing I’ve ever even considered doing and have never seen anyone do it. Maybe they’re just being discrete.

In Christ,
Nancy

 

[Catholic4aReasn]

Melissa:

leaving Mass to feed one’s baby means that the mother will fail to fulfill her Sunday obligation .

I’m not so sure this is true.

In Christ,
Nancy

 

[Spatulate]

I am not only a nursing mother, I am a board certified lacation consultant and I say go ahead and nurse! Our family sits in the front pew, I have nursed all our babies in Mass at various times and ages.
If people are giving her grief, perhaps she could plainly tell them her child is hungry and she is giving him/her the best food possible.

 

[hydrochief]

Toni:

My daughter is a nursing mother and wanted to know what people on the forum had to say about mothers nursing their babies at Mass. Since she is a nursing mother and has received negative comments.

Without wading through everyone else’s opinion…

Is there a cry room she can go to? If so, then I would say no big deal…

I don’t have a problem with breastfeeding, it’s the natural form! But sitting in the pews and breastfeeding during the Mass, I think it would be both disconcerting and distracting. But that’s just me.

 

[jeanine]

Catholic4aReasn:

I was surprised to see that several here DID nurse at Mass. I guess I just always nursed my kids right before we left the house and then they wouldn’t be hungry during Mass. To be honest, it’s nothing I’ve ever even considered doing and have never seen anyone do it. Maybe they’re just being discrete.

In Christ,
Nancy

this is one of the first responses i agree with…i nursed all of my kids too…i would always ‘top them off’ before i had to go somewhere that would be inconvenient for me or them to nurse.

i just wish everyone would not get so upset over this! it is really up to the discretion of the mom… a 3 month old baby is usually sleeping during mass anyway but the 6-8 month old can be topped off or given a cup during mass…and it is absolutely inappropriate for a child that can speak nurse during mass…i just is not nutritionally neccessary…it just seems like some of these responses are so extreme…i think our society really does except BF…every single mom i know has BF her baby…but there is a time and a place! take care!

 

[jess7396]

As you can see from this thread, having 95% of the people at Mass be loving and supportive of babies eating the way God made them to eat (and, for that matter to be comforted- it is supported by scripture that BFing is not just for relieving hunger, it is meant to comfort as well), does not do it when a small, vocal percentage make the mom feel badly—it is so sad.

My Church is luckily very family friendly (no cry rooms), and I do sometimes nurse in Mass, and I bet you that if people didn’t see me burping him on my shoulder afterwards or see a bit of spit up on his little lips, they would never know that I had nursed him. I am VERY discreet, and b/c there is no exposure of my breast, there is NO VALID ARGUMENT against me nursing my babe in Mass. ITA with Daniellet that people are upset by the idea of BFing for some reason, this has nothing to do with modesty.

Your daughter should do what she is comfortable with, and yes, she can nurse discreetly at Mass and if people give her grief she can pray for those people.

I say to your daughter, “Good for you for using your breasts to give your baby nourishment and comfort, I am sure God is happy to see that happening, I highly doubt he’d be happier to see a bottle in your babe’s mouth ”

 

[jess7396]

OK, I just have to ask, do people here really believe that nursing is only about food intake? Do those here disagreeing with nursing during Mass think that nursing a baby for comfort (as mentioned a few times in the Bible) is wrong? Would it be better for me to stick a pacifier in his mouth? Better to walk around the back of the Church trying to keep him quiet? Better to give him a bottle? Seriously? What is the best way to quiet a babe during Mass (in your opinion, of course, we all know I think that BFing him would be the best way )

 

[renee1258]

As some people stated even done discreetly, peaple are wierded out that it is actually happening discreetly. they realize it when they want to take a peak at the baby, or the realized the baby isn’t being held over my shoulder but underneath my shirt. I grew up where no one breast fed, so it just feels odd to someone who only knew the bottle.

Anywhere a baby is allowed, so is breastfeeding. Just as no one would deny a baby a bottle in a public place. I fed my son, at the 4th of July fair and even in a court of law. Bottle fed my first, and breast feed my second. Babies got to eat either way.

 

[mercygate]

mass4life:

Mary nursed Christ our Lord. Discreet and unoffending nursing is highly do-able. God gave her baby to her, not to the parishioners. Tell her to tend to her baby in the tender way she has done and don’t give a hoot what the others think. I have and will nurse during Mass when my child needs to, period. He’s more important that what someone may think of me.

I’m with Daniellet: I fed the baby before heading for Church. As she observed, it’s only an hour: what’s the big deal? I didn’t miss Mass and the baby didn’t fuss during the service.

On those rare occasions when this was not possible, I stepped into the reconciliation room.

And this DEFINITELY does not qualify as failing to fulfill one’s obligation. For mothers who have the knack of nursing unobtrusively, more power to 'em. I never figured out how to do it without practically getting undressed. I guess they didn’t have nursing shirts back then!

 

[mercygate]

jess7396:

OK, I just have to ask, do people here really believe that nursing is only about food intake? Do those here disagreeing with nursing during Mass think that nursing a baby for comfort (as mentioned a few times in the Bible) is wrong? Would it be better for me to stick a pacifier in his mouth? Better to walk around the back of the Church trying to keep him quiet? Better to give him a bottle? Seriously? What is the best way to quiet a babe during Mass (in your opinion, of course, we all know I think that BFing him would be the best way )

My babies used to be content with my pinkie finger until after Mass. Then they got the real thing.

 

[darcee]

As long as there is no breach of modesty who cares if the baby is sucking on a finger or nipple? What difference does it make?

If my baby is laying in my arms under a blanket how is anyone to know if he is sleeping or nursing?

This seems like such a non issue.

-D

 

[Friar_David_O.Carm]

After reading this thread I guess its ok for me to bring in my lunch from McDonalds and sit down and eat it?

I think there is a time and a place for this, as there is for everything else, and in this case, as in most others, the Liturgy is not the place for it.

 

[jess7396]

darcee:

As long as there is no breach of modesty who cares if the baby is sucking on a finger or nipple? What difference does it make?

If my baby is laying in my arms under a blanket how is anyone to know if he is sleeping or nursing?

This seems like such a non issue.

-D

I am right there with you on this one, I really fail to see why my son sucking my finger is more acceptable than him nursing discreetly I truly just don’t get it. And the comparison to an adult eating Mc D’s, not even close!

Why is a baby discreetly being comforted and fed at his mother’s breast somehow less acceptable to people than him sucking a bottle or a finger?

IMO- this shows how strangely our priorities are placed–better to put plastic in a child’s mouth than to feed/comfort him as God designed us?

Luckily, it seems obvious that although everyone has a right to their opinion on this, no one should be checking under blankets to ensure that the babies are simply sleeping, instead of—gasp—eating or being comforted-so, it really should be a complete non-issue so long as mom is modest about it.

I am so sad that BFing is viewed so negatively in our society as to be compared to things like fast food and tampon changing. I wonder if God thinks He designed something dirty when he created milk-giving breasts.

Patty

 

[kmktexas]

David,

Especially if that cheeseburger is comfort food.

Seriously, I do not have a problem with mothers nursing their babies discretely in church or anywhere else, for that matter. I do have a problem with the “in your face” attitude that some women take about it. If you have a baby that isn’t likely to last the length of Mass between feedings, why would you sit front and center? When my babies were little, I knew all the “good” places for nursing them: ladies rooms with a lounge area, baby stores and toy stores with nursing areas, even park benches that were somewhat sheltered. The same should go for Mass. There is probably a good place to sit in church where nursing can be private and not distracting to others.

There isn’t anything wrong with nursing - in private or in public. But nursing isn’t a political cause. There are lots of ways to nurse a baby that do not involve being a distraction or bringing attention to yourself at Mass where the attention should be on the altar.

 

[mom2boyz]

I nursed my son at a Mass presided over by the Pope. As far as I could tell, he’s pro-nursing so why shouldn’t the rest of us be. I do think being discreet is the best for everyone. The idea is not to be distracting so that everyone can focus on what is happening at Mass. I usually covered us with a blanket and wore shirts that buttoned down the front for easy access and less of me showing. We also sat in an area where mostly families with young children were. At Christmas Mass, I did use a bottle just because it was so crowded.

 

[Marys_daughter]

I’ve noticed that at the last 2, very large parishes I attended, not many women breastfed at Mass.

Recently I have attended Latin Mass and a whole bunch of women are nursing their babies and toddlers. Church here is not that crowded so you really do notice it…I mean a baby or toddler is hollering and the next moment they are in Mom’s lap as quiet as can be, so you know they’re nursing.

Now here is my little observation. At the large parishes-where I went- you often saw all kinds of immodest dressing. Belly shirts, belly piercings showing, short shorts, low rise tight jeans, halter tops, that kind of thing. At the Latin Mass all the women are as modest as can be. All in long dresses, buttoned high, nothing flashy or tight.

I’m probably not doing a good job making my point but I’ll try. Breastfeeding in church has nothing at all to do with “modesty.” If it were an immodest practice, you would see it more at the parishes where dressing is “anything goes” and not at all at the parish where everyone dresses very, oh, prim and proper.

I think the more nursing babies at Mass, the better! What a beautiful way to share the Pro-life, Pro-family message.

Stephanie

PS I would also suggest that anyone who has a problem with nursing Moms at Mass, try a study on JPII’s Theology of the Body. If you don’t change your mind at least you will probably start to understand why so many find this not only acceptable but actually a sign of God and Christian love.

 

[loyola_rambler]

daniellet:

Women in many Muslim societies, hardly bra burning poster women, breastfeed their babies in public.

%between%

Sorry to break it to you, but Mary wasn’t Muslim–she was Jewish. The Jewish culture never permitted women to breastfeed in public. The Muslim faith wasn’t even founded for several hundred years after Mary, so you’re analogy is out of date, out of place and out of culture.

daniellet:

As for the art coming from the 1400’s, one of the earliest pieces of Marian art (well before 1400) portrays Mary nursing Jesus.

How wonderful…but it still doesn’t show her doing it in a room full of people during mass.

daniellet:

My discreetly breastfeeding my baby is not disgusting. Your comparing breastfeeding to changing a tampon* is*, however, disgusting.

Sorry, but to many of us, watching a woman fiddling with her breast during mass is completely inappropriate. If you want to do it in a restaurant, hey that’s up to you. But mass is different and your lack of reverence is in bad taste.

daniellet:

I do think societies norms wrt breastfeeding are wrong.

Good for you. Go to it. But if you do it during mass, then you’re acts are as inappropriate as reading a Barney book or listening to the radio or eating your lunch. There’s a time and a place for everything and mass isn’t the place to breastfeed your child. There ARE places you can go…and you’re not failing to fulfill your obligation to attend mass just because you go to the back of the church or sit in the cry room.

 

[daniellet]

loyola rambler:
Sorry to break it to you, but Mary wasn’t Muslim–she was Jewish. The Jewish culture never permitted women to breastfeed in public. The Muslim faith wasn’t even founded for several hundred years after Mary, so you’re analogy is out of date, out of place and out of culture.

How wonderful…but it still doesn’t show her doing it in a room full of people during mass.

Sorry, but to many of us, watching a woman fiddling with her breast during mass is completely inappropriate. If you want to do it in a restaurant, hey that’s up to you. But mass is different and your lack of reverence is in bad taste.

Good for you. Go to it. But if you do it during mass, then you’re acts are as inappropriate as reading a Barney book or listening to the radio or eating your lunch. There’s a time and a place for everything and mass isn’t the place to breastfeed your child. There ARE places you can go…and you’re not failing to fulfill your obligation to attend mass just because you go to the back of the church or sit in the cry room.
I am not going to argue with you any further. I find your attitude to be venemous and highly uncharitable. I am discreet when I breastfeed and I am sure that it is ok with my Lord if I nurse my baby whom he has entrusted me with at His mass. I don’t need you to determine whether or not I am doing something in bad taste.