Thomas, I was waiting for you to get to your real point: Your opinion that marriage tribunals don’t have a clue as to the actual circumstances.
Well, the only point was that it did not have a clue in mine, and I know it. Also please don’t be offended, but it is not really correct to come to a general conclusion from what I said about marriage tribunals other than they are not always right and that they are not is no trivial matter.
My friend, please don’t be offended, but did it ever cross your mind that you could be wrong and that your first marriage was in fact invalid–that the tribunal knew more than you did about your wife’s original state of mind when she said “I do”?
Of course I’m not offended and it surely did cross my mind. I had a long period to consider this question and concluded I could not be a party to it even if it meant no second marriage for me, even though I was still young. It is a complex question for another to answer, what goes on in the recesses of another’s mind, but as it was I was one of only two persons who participated in the marriage ceremony and also one of the only two persons who experienced every moment of the marriage and knew its dynamic almost infinitely better than any other person possibly could have, let alone strangers. I did not participate in the marriage case, as canon law allows, but I knew much the marriage tribunal never knew, such as the nonsense that was provided for me to review before it was submitted to the tribunal, as well as the reservations that later kept either of us from remarrying. And there were of course the discussions between the two of us when we reconcilled.
The tribunal was presented only what was thought they would want to hear–simple as that, and I know it. This was shown to me before it was submitted to the tribunal. I did not object, taking no position at all, but beyond what it was thought the tribunal would want to hear it was nonsense. We were both lifelong Catholics, college graduates in our mid-twenties, and had been a couple even before our college days. We knew very well what we were doing when we married, there was never a question in my mind that the marriage was valid and I did not need strangers fifteen-hundred miles away to judge this for me. Suffice it to say, the person who presented the petition to the tribunal certainly does not disagree and really never did. It was a difficult time and should be understood in that context.
You know your own state of mind but, because of your field of study, you would be the first to admit that it’s often impossible for one spouse to know a brand new spouse’s state of mind. Your wife may very well have had an uncertainty/reservation about the “Until death do us part” thing or something else; children, the Faith, etc., which came to light during the annulment process. Trust me, Thomas, it happens.
I know it happens but also that it did not happen in this instance. Could I be wrong in believing the marriage was valid? There is the possibility, but I am also persuaded the tribunal would not have found the marriage null and void had it known what I knew. Beyond that, there was also a technically under canon law where the distant marriage tribunal did not have jurisdiction to hear the case anyway. Only I could have known why, but again I said nothing. But in fact, I knew it was the Decree of Nullity that was null and void.
KSU=13346896:
So, I must respectfully disagree with you about the value and competence of marriage tribunals. I have seen their work up close and personal, and I believe they act conservatively and get it right far more often than they act too liberally and get it wrong. There are many, many happy couples today because of marriage tribunals.
Yes, I understand and am certainly not offended. I was addressing but one case, the one I do know. From a personal standpoint, it is ancient history. I am only trying to provide another perspective from what I do know. A marriage annullment is no simple process The tribunals may get it right, but as you say they also get it wrong. This is my only point. What are the consequences for it? It opens the process to serious questions.
I would note that the Latin version of the 1983 code of Canon Law is the only authorized text. How many members of marriage tribunals have even read and comprehended the technicalities of the complex law they are applying? I will say this concerns what one might know about the intricacies of canon law and the difficulty of translation from Latin to English which is often awkward.