palmas85:
If the reason for his conversion was the love shown by the community and not the devotion and love HE felt for God, was the conversion real and sincere or was he simply looking for a comfortable place to be? Many people join religions for reasons other than to praise and worship God. Many do it as an attempt to find something lacking in their lives, for acceptance, to impress someone or for any variety of reasons. And to go a bit further, if someone leaves a Parish or a Church for that matter, because he doesn’t feel the “love” of the community, maybe he was looking for something other than the glorification and worship of God in the first place.
The Catholic Church actually has rules that need to be followed and adhered to. And as far as I know, Catholics are not excused from that even if they think that they move as the Spirit moves them.
You have tried to be gentle and charitable here in your concerns for Mom of 5 and her husband, and I am going to try to do the same, although much here concerns me. Like you, I mean no offense.
First, as to following the Spirit or the rules, IMHO, our primary responsibility in life is to discern the workings of the Spirit and follow them faithfully. Rules, no matter how well intentioned, or how much thought and prayer was given to them, are still man-made and cannot overrule what our consciences tell us, as our conscience is considered to be God talking to us through the Spirit. In a perfect world there would be no conflict between rules and “movement of the Spirit” as the rules would be perfectly thought out and our discernment of the Spirit would never be in errror. Unfortunately, we were not created with perfect knowledge and can only do our best to discern the Spirit. While we are to give great weight to the “rules” in our discernment, we are still obligated at the end to act within the dictates of our conscience, always aware that it can be improperly formed and that we must be ready to repent if we find it in error. Slavishness to the rules without concern for the forming of the heart is also dangerous, as both Jesus and Paul made clear in numerous places, as we are saved by our love, not by the rules and “works of the law.”
As to Mom of 5’s husband and his reasons for converting, I agree that some may intellectually come to a conclusion of where they believe God is truly to be found. I believe though that many or most come to a change of faith tradition (or the stirrings of a call to faith) based on what they see in a faith community. I would tend to disagree about that necessarily being a bad thing. I recently left our home parish because it has been totally transformed by the priest, who is part of the new breed of young priests coming out of the seminary glorifying the “old Church” and totally rejecting Vatican 2. We now travel 45 minutes over the mountains to another parish where the call to gospel life as a result of prayer and discernment of God’s will is abundantly reflected in the community.
The highest praise we can give God is to love Him through His creation. The “final exam” is the parable of the sheep and goats, where Jesus makes clear that it is not those who are praying “Lord, Lord” who will enter the kingdom, but those who are feeding the hungry, housing the homeless, etc. In other words, we will enter the kingdom if we praise him by tending to his presence in each other. It is seeing his presence in a loving and welcoming community that will draw people to the Catholic faith. Without that loving community, I would suggest that the Catholic faith is not truly present.
While I agree that joining, or changing parishes, for the “warm, fuzzy” boost to our self-esteem cannot be the goal or the purpose, nor can doing so for coercive reasons such as a future spouse’s demands, God works slowly and patiently however in bringing us to Himself. I know I was a “pew potato” for years after coming back to the Church as God slowly put people in my path to model the life I was being called to. You have to get them to the table before you can feed them, and if the table isn’t attractive, who is going to come? It’s God’s work to “set the hook” when it’s time. It’s our job to “throw out the bait” by being the loving, welcoming people He made us to be. As John said, “you cannot claim to love the God you cannot see if you don’t love the neighbor you can see.” James makes it even clearer that it isn’t faith unless it’s taking action. People are converted and transformed by the loving example of God’s people, so it is only natural that they will be drawn to those who display that. Over time, transformation deepens as we learn to live that love ourselves.
As OTM commented, I think there is a long and still devloping story here and we can safely leave these two people in God’s loving hands.
Peace,
John