There seems to be no shortage of writers in the world at large, nor of thinkers here on the forums, nor of holy-rollers in the pews and on the parish councils who talk and talk about feeling God’s presence (in the Eucharist, in the sunrise, in the silence, you name it).
Yet, there are so few saints walking among us. I have seen how people change their driving when they honestly believe a policeman is watching them. IT IS REMARKABLE. They suddenly remember where to find the lever for their turn signals, their driving speed magically drops into conformity with posted limits, on and on.
Sure, we are weak. So? Drivers are horrible drivers and make all sorts of lazy or careless decisions most of the time, but if they see a police car nearby and think someone is watching them who can fine them, they somehow get a lot less weak. I do not have enough fingers and toes to count all the people I have talked to who claim to feel Christ, but I can count on less than one pinky finger the number I have ever met - even with two degrees of separation - who sold everything they owned and left to go help the poor.
What is the piece of the puzzle that I’m missing?
Perhaps that you are judging by appearances?
In fact, that you are judging others at all.
Jesus went on to say, “To what, then, can I compare the people of this generation? What are they like? They are like children sitting in the marketplace and calling out to each other:
“‘We played the pipe for you,
and you did not dance;
we sang a dirge,
and you did not cry.’
For John the Baptist came neither eating bread nor drinking wine, and you say, ‘He has a demon.’ The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and you say, ‘Here is a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners.’ But wisdom is proved right by all her children.” (Luke 7:31-35)
Are you, like John, called to eat locusts and wild honey or, like Jesus, to eat and drink with sinners? How would you know?
Suppose that rich man strolling the street in front of you was Jesus, himself, incognito about to surprise someone in desperate need? Do you feel qualified to tell him he shouldn’t be living so high on the hog?
Suppose the poor pan handler was Jesus looking you in the eye? He can’t sell what he doesn’t have, but do you expect him to give it away, too, when he gets it?
It isn’t about what we do, but our freedom in Christ to do whatever we are called to do.
Now, that you are asking others means you are lacking that oneness with Christ that empowers the freedom you seem to feel is missing from your life. That freedom comes from Christ himself, not from imagining what Christ would do, but the real presence of Christ freeing us to do whatever is needed at the moment.
Remember, also Paul’s words:
If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing. (1 Cor 13:3)
A young mother, who out of love, clothes, feeds and cares for and gives herself completely to the poor, naked and helpless young child in front of her out of love is living the love of God far more ‘gainfully’ than someone who out of some idealized sense of the “demands of the Gospel” sells everything just to claim or, in Paul’s words, to “boast” they have done so.
Why do you feel a need to prove anything to anyone, in particular to God? If God is moving you, you will know. If he isn’t, knocking yourself around trying to prove you deserve his love by selling everything isn’t going to earn more stars.
Do the little things out of love for God and others. Be faithful in those and leave the rest to God.
