Thanks very much for that excellent (name removed by moderator)ut, pensmama. I’ve actually been suspecting some narcissism in my husband for several months now. Did some research on the typical characteristics, and he has many of them, though not usually all. I’m thinking he may be somewhat narcissistic, although thankfully not completely. Hopefully that means there’s hope for the future. I pray.
Very good points, Hoosier Daddy. Thanks for contributing it. Honor and moral values seem to have flown out the window in much, if not most, of society today. I’m just amazed that God has the patience to keep giving chance, after chance, after chance instead of coming here and now in the final judgement, but He is true MERCY, and His plan and hopes can be far different than ours - but always the best.
Thank you so much for that very wise (name removed by moderator)ut, Walking Home. May Our Lord bless your always.
So the “blame” really lies in the way a woman dresses?this is a very frightening example of blaming and shaming the victim. In Rio you have beautiful women on the beach topless, not to titilate, no pun intended, but because it’s their culture and it’s, you know, 100 degrees at the beach. There’s nothing wrong with noticing or glancing at an attractive beautiful person, male or female, but to try and blame the way they’re dressed on causing lust is definitely wrong and dangerous in my opinion.
Thank you so much, pensmama. It’s very distressing that there are still so many men in this world who condone or minimize lustful actions, but unfortunately there are, even on these forums.
Very good points, BlueEyedLady. I didn’t think my husband’s behavior was normal, even for a guy. Maybe just for a hormone-crazed teenager. Perhaps he’s never gotten past that stage of his life as far as this issue is concerned and/or doesn’t wish to. In most other areas he’s very sensible and mature. I’m still trying to figure him out and remain kind and caring at the same time. Thanks for sharing, and God bless.
Thanks very much for that, kptrs. It’s much appreciated. I’m relieved to say that finally after five days the cold shoulder treatment by my husband has ended. Still no apology or acknowledgement of any wrong done, but fortunately it’s a step in the right direction - or at least a better direction than this difficult past week has been, anyway. God’s blessings to you.
Oh yes, men never looked at women lustfully back in the 1950’s. It’s all the woman’s fault now for how they dress. Poor man, he can’t help himself, it not his fault. And his wife? It’s her fault for being so sensitive.
Exactly. If this is what the husband is doing, it’s creepy.
First, we don’t know the truth of the matter. People come on forums and post all kinds of one-sided, exaggerated stories. Maybe he did act inappropriately, and perhaps he did not. Maybe the stare wasn’t even a stare. Perhaps he was looking at something else altogether that caught his attention.
Why are you so adamant to disbelieve what the OP is saying? She describes it as “a long, fixated stare - so much so that their eyes often follow the (usually young) woman or girl as they walk until they’re out of sight,and they sometimes even adjust their stance or seat so they can ogle better and longer.”
Why would you take her at her word? Women make false accusations against men all the time. There is no proof or evidence that what she is describing is even remotely accurate.
If the post is true - which is an enormous leap of faith, no doubt - then I would advise the poster to seek counseling with a competent priest, preferably with her husband in attendance. If the husband refuses, she should still seek counseling for herself personally, because there are even more deep-seated issues of trust if the husband refuses to accept the need for counseling.
She is slandering her husband. You cannot take her at her word because we have no witnesses, and no evidence. We are only hearing one side of the story.
If you haven’t got anything to say other than “women make false statements against men all the time”, I can’t see your posts being any help. Like IrishMom said, this is a forum. We take people at their word unless it is glaringly obvious that someone is making it up.
Why would you take ANYONE at their word then on this site? Why should anyone listen to ANY of your advice then?
Perhaps the original poster should avoid making highly derogatory comments about her husband on a public forum. Comments that defame his character and could ruin his reputation and cause great personal embarrassment.