Rude comments on Catholic faith

[melonhead]

On the flip side, would disparaging comments about any other group be written off as a reaction is what the person wants? Honestly, I think not.

I still say don’t tell him off, but tell him politely, in a calm tone, that you find his comments offensive, and ask him to cease saying them in your presence. If he doesn’t, go to HR.

This way he’s not getting a big scene, but you’re letting him know to stop. Win-win!

 

[Divine3]

Welcome to CAF – I would buy ear plugs and every time he spoke about our faith, I would put them in my ears and start singing a song and when people started to complain about my singing – I would say, “I am being harassed about my religion and this psychology abuse is stopping me from performing my work to my best capacity.”. And pick a song that is well known that fits the occasion. Also… Will pray for you and that persecutor…

 

[Tis_Bearself]

OP, I agree with redbetta. You need to report this to your boss and also to human resources.

This goes beyond somebody just having a problem with the Church - it’s creating a hostile work environment for you. As 1ke said, it is bullying and harassment.
It’s unacceptable and in many countries would be a violation of law or grounds for a lawsuit.

 

[blackforest]

‘I hate the Catholic religion’ and ‘I hate the Mass because it is too long’ etc. are not personal attacks based on your religion. They are expressions of opinion about your religion.

You’re entitled to your personal opinion on the matter, but I’m afraid that U.S. law disagrees with you. Fact Sheet: Religious Discrimination | U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission

Title VII also prohibits religious harassment of employees, such as offensive remarks about a person’s religious beliefs or practices. Although the law doesn’t prohibit simple teasing, offhand comments, or isolated incidents that aren’t very serious, harassment can be unlawful when it is so frequent or severe that it creates a hostile or offensive work environment or when it results in an adverse employment decision (such as the victim being fired or demoted).

If you had a co-worker create a hostile work environment with continual stabs about how atheists are going to hell, I’d hope that you, too, would report it to HR.

Am I right to feel so offended?

Of course you are. Only confront this person first if you feel safe doing so, or if you know that you have a chance for a positive and productive outcome. The you could move up to HR if doing so is ineffective. Otherwise, head directly to HR.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

‘I hate the Catholic religion’ and ‘I hate the Mass because it is too long’ etc. are not personal attacks based on your religion. They are expressions of opinion about your religion.

From a legal standpoint in USA, someone repeatedly making such remarks about any particular religion (Catholic, Jewish, Muslim etc) in the workplace, and especially around a known practitioner of such religion, is unacceptable. As I said, it can be a violation of law or grounds for a lawsuit. I have seen many such lawsuits (I once had a job involving a lot of government employee discipline cases and lawsuits, and this type of situation is one that came up regularly). It is considered creating a hostile work environment and harassment.

I am less familiar with the law in UK but I suspect it would also be a problem there.

 

[neophyte]

Thank you for reading, any comments would be much appreciated.

This is a classic case of someone creating a hostile work environment. It’s a serious violation of the law, and you need to report it to your manager and your HR rep.

 

[neophyte]

I attend a public school, so reporting it may not have done very much unfortunately. It’s just a shame that I’ve been driven out because of him.

This is exactly why you should report it to the administration, the school board, and the District Attorney. It’s a serious violation of the law, and letting it go just allows the perp to keep doing it to other people.

 

[amazingcatholic]

I am sorry this is bothering you so much. I completely understand situation, I have been called prejudice by my parents before. Please report them to HR or mention this to your boss. People should be respectful. Here is one of my favorite quotes by St. Clare.
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[FiveLinden]

From a legal standpoint in USA, someone repeatedly making such remarks about any particular religion (Catholic, Jewish, Muslim etc) in the workplace, and especially around a known practitioner of such religion, is unacceptable. As I said, it can be a violation of law or grounds for a lawsuit. I have seen many such lawsuits (I once had a job involving a lot of government employee discipline cases and lawsuits, and this type of situation is one that came up regularly). It is considered creating a hostile work environment and harassment.

I am less familiar with the law in UK but I suspect it would also be a problem there

I didn’t say the activity was lawful. Resort to anti-harassment provisions are always an option but often not successful. I was pointing out that the statements were not personal, and that this allowed a range of possible effective responses.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

The statements are indeed personal. It’s disingenuous to contend otherwise. And there is no need to share such opinions at work, unless perhaps this is a comparative religions think tank. The places I have worked would consider such statements a violation of corporate policy and the offender would likely be sent to a training and told to stop.

 

[Jimbo]

Amen. That person is just being completely unprofessional.

Imagine, for a moment, that you had a Wiccan working the cube over. You obviously would have major theological differences. Would you sit there and just snipe at them from afar? It’s rude, cowardly, and destructive of any business team.

 

[Jimbo]

Seriously. Report the guy. Explain to him he’s creating a hostile learning environment. Then report him.

 

[vz71]

Would this be within the US?

Knowing what country this is in would help people know what laws are applicable.

If this is in the US, report them to HR.

It sounds to me like a Catholic that is actively rebelling against their Church.

 

[Poet]

The statements are indeed personal. It’s disingenuous to contend otherwise. And there is no need to share such opinions at work, unless perhaps this is a comparative religions think tank. The places I have worked would consider such statements a violation of corporate policy and the offender would likely be sent to a training and told to stop.

Agreed. Completely disingenuous particularly when we all know full well that someone who went to work daily saying

“I hate Islam, I hate prayer rugs, imams are terrible people” to their Muslim co-worker would be fired.

“I hate homosexuality, I hate the thought of two men together,” to a gay co-worker would be fired.

Even to state every day how much you hate tattoos and piercings to your tattooed and pierced co-worker would be rude and out of line.

We could without doubt add to the list. But the above would be creating a hostile work environment, it is bullying, it is not adult behavior, and it makes it difficult to do the job for which all employees are there. It is just as out of line to do it to a Catholic as to a Muslim or a gay person.

One thought I haven’t seen yet is, yes, report to HR, but also pray for this co-worker every time she does this. Offer it up but also report.

 

[Kindnessmatters]

Just so you know, his Southern Baptist Church wouldn’t stand for his behaviours and attitudes either. I would think gay pride flags at school would be inappropriate as well… if some political and religious (or anti-religious) promotion is permitted, so should yours.

 

[catholic-heart]

Thank you.
I suppose I was feeling uncertain on whether I was overreacting or not; I didn’t want to bring it up to my boss before, but after this last incident I felt pretty angry and think I should probably bring it up somehow.

For those of you inquiring, it is in the US and the person is a different christian denomination.

I tend to forgive & forget once the person starts acting decently again, but yes I will pray for them. I usually just ignore the rude comments as by replying I feel like it makes her dislike for catholics grow (she doesn’t take seriously what I say in defense of the church anyway.)

 

[vz71]

I usually just ignore the rude comments as by replying I feel like it makes her dislike for catholics grow (she doesn’t take seriously what I say in defense of the church anyway.)

Good idea.
Keep it all one sided.
When HR brings the hammer down, you want to be above reproach.

 

[Michael16]

I agree that the hostile coworker should be reported and so should the hostile choir director.

Here’s my problem with these two offenders:

1: The anti Catholic at work, assuming she’s some form of Protestant; isn’t showing the fruits of faith in Our Lord Jesus Christ by showing such obvious hatred. That’s the devil’s work; not God’s. She needs to sincerely practice her faith rather than bash ours. Hypocrisy. Makes me angry when I see it.

2: The gay Southern Baptist choir director. I agree that he needs to be reported and stopped. People like him will continue such bad behavior unless they’re made to stop. As for his homosexuality: He’s a hypocrite and not really being a Christian of any form as his lifestyle is a direct violation of God’s Law and Scripture. Seriously. He calls himself a Christian while he acts with such malice and living the gay lifestyle?

 

[anon91549587]

Yesterday i had to see a catholic counselling centre , one of the chief issues i had was being bullied from a protestant in my late teen years in the army . I do encourage you to report and put an end to this , doing so will also set an example to the rest who might feel the urge to do so.

 

[Dan_Defender]

Have you tried ignoring this person? usually when the bigot sees his/her words have no effect then they stop.