Rudeness in Adoration

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The priest did the right thing. Often people are afraid to say something and end up leaving Adoration out of frustration. Probably the best thing to do is put up a notice with guidelines about quiet and then all one has to do is get the person’s attention and point to the notice.
 
What can be the right thing if executed in an ugly manner?

I can’t imagine that anyone is comfortable being “bawled out,” reprimanded, set straight, corrected, or whatever you want to call it.

Especially not in Church

Especially not during Adoration.

Especially by a priest.

Especially while praying.

Maybe the priest could benefit by putting himself into the shoes and pews of others.
 
Bawled out? lol He whispered loudly.

Be quiet…

Especially in Church

Especially during Adoration

Maybe those who pray loudly can benefit by thinking of those around them.
 
You were not present 🙂 Or were you?

There are various types of whispers. The three of us jumped, he took it over the top. But he is human and prone to sin as well. If I am in the back and they are in the front, that whisper was not friendly. That’s not to say she shouldn’t be redirected… if he could in fact hear her.
You seem to be passionate on this topic for this situation.
 
OP said that she could not hear the woman with whom the priest was annoyed, but she could hear what he was saying to the woman. An unexpected berating in the presence of others, especially while praying—and by a priest—is equivalent to a “bawling out.”

If her eyes were closed, or if she was so concentrating on prayer that she was oblivious to her surroundings, he could’ve touched her gently or waved his hand within her field of vision, put a finger to his lips and smiled, even if ruefully. She’d have been embarrassed, but not mortified, the situation would’ve been solved, and probably everyone would’ve forgotten it within a few hours.
 
I use a rosary app. No offense but it’s not about whether you or others like my electronics or not. …it’s a personal devotion. I find I can keep track of the mysteries better using the app. I suffer from an autoimmune disease and the app helps me with the resulting brain fog that causes me to lose track. It’s no more distracting than someone clicking beads

I also pray and keep track of novenas using my phone. I keep it on silent so it doesn’t bother others.

It is just a tool…no moreso than a prayer book.

I am with you on the other gripes. On a different thread I complained about a woman who came in to play “Jesus Loves Me” on flute with some loud, badly behaved kids mocking the song while yelling it, uncorrected. It was SO loud. I finished praying in my car, which was very cold, which was distracting. I found it disruptive and irreverent.
 
Passionate? Lol Nah it’s just common curtesy to think about those around you and how disruptive you might be. It’s really not a big deal. The priest corrected a situation as he should have. I’ve seen many a priest address the loudness situation before Mass with many people talking while others are trying to pray and they did it pretty forcibly. Sometimes you have to make a point.
 
Jen95 said:
Is there a set of guidelines or rules for adoration? Like how exactly are you supposed to genuflect?
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AlruwhAlquds said:
Bow on both knees, get on your right knee then your left (right knee first). Bow down and do the sign of the cross and get up. I have visited other parishes before and no everyone is traditional and will either not bow or not use both knees.
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While kneeling before the Blessed Sacrament is a good, pious practice, it is not a rule. Genuflection is fine, as is bowing from a standing position if one cannot genuflect.
 
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It’s also common curtesy and compassionate to possible be patient with those who are elderly and not realize their tone and correct them compassionately, especially in an intimate setting. Life is not that black and white, telling someone is wrong when they are wrong can be done with love or with anger. More people can see that on this thread, except you. I find it odd it’s not even considered when people like you read of this situation without actually being there.
 
I use my phone too, although I always turn the screen brightness right down and hold the phone close to myself with the cover flap like a book so I don’t think anyone can see it at all. I do find it distracting when someone used a phone and the screen is really bright, especially in a dimmly lit church. I think the light is bad mangers and distracting but using a phone per se not at all. I have many prayers or devotions, as well as of course the Bible etc on my phone. I don’t even have paper copies of many of them so the phone is kind of necessary.
 
In such situations, I ask myself: Have I ever done that? And, of course the answer is yes. We do not have the entire story. This might have been a repeat situation, or he had complaints from others about her.

Since it did not directly involve you, simply offer a pray for both - which it appears you have done. It is far too easy to judge, and particularly if we lack the entire story.
 
UpUpAndAway said:
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Jen95:
Is there a set of guidelines or rules for adoration? Like how exactly are you supposed to genuflect?
Click to expand...
AlruwhAlquds said:
Bow on both knees, get on your right knee then your left (right knee first). Bow down and do the sign of the cross and get up. I have visited other parishes before and no everyone is traditional and will either not bow or not use both knees.
Click to expand...
While kneeling before the Blessed Sacrament is a good, pious practice, it is not a rule. Genuflection is fine, as is bowing from a standing position if one cannot genuflect.
Click to expand...
Yes, this is correct. The custom of going down on both knees was removed back in the 70s I believe (certainly it was several decades ago). If you think about it, it didn’t make any sense to distinguish between reverence shown to Jesus in the Monstrance to that shown before the Tabernacle. He is still the same Jesus, the same Real Presence. So the sign of reverence should be the same - in other words, both knees for both, or a single knee genuflection for both. And Rome decided on the latter.

And there’s certainly never been any complicated rules about which knee comes first when getting up, nor following it with a bow and a Sign of the Cross .
 
I use my phone or tab at adoration. Sometimes i pray the prayers i have saved in these gadgets. But i dont make sounds. Hope it doesnt annoy ordisturb anybody. After all, i am the only one reading off the screen.
 
Camehome4john6 said:
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AlruwhAlquds:
Bow on both knees, get on your right knee then your left (right knee first).
Click to expand...
If I had to get down on both knees adoration would be very much disturbed when people would have to try to get me back up.
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Sometimes it’s all I can do to half genuflect let alone kneel for long periods or go down on both knees. I sure hope people aren’t judging me for it.
 
AlruwhAlquds said:
I was just in adoration and noticed a priest being rude to an older woman. This is a small adoration room, the priest is a visiting priest and not part of our church. Sometimes he celebrates mass at our parish when he visits. Anyway, me and another two others witnessed it. He was in the front of adoration and the older woman was in a pew behind him and adjacent to him. I had my eyes closed but suddenly he whispers loudly, “Excuse me, EXCUSE ME!” to her, since she was into praying and probably had her eyes closed. Then he whispered loudly again, “I can HEAR everything you’re saying!” And motions to his ear very abruptly in frustration. Me and the other two in adoration sort of jumped, and glanced at each-other when he basically chewed her out. He was loud enough for me to snap out praying of for a moment and I was in the back. I couldn’t help but feel sorry for the older woman, she didn’t seem like she would be loud. Me and the other two didn’t hear her. I only say this because, moments before entering adoration she complimented my coat and tried to hold the door for me. She didn’t’ strike me as someone who would be annoying.

And don’t get me wrong, people can be loud in adoration and they should be redirected. If this woman was praying loud enough for him to hear, he should redirect her but in not such a angry manner. I’ve seen priests approach others and ask them to try praying in their minds and etc or “please keep your voice down” privately to the person, that would be more appropriate.

This priest looks considerably younger than her and annoyed by her. All I did was pray for both of them. I ended up leaving shortly after, but wished I stayed back to see if she was ok. I get it… priests are human, I’m not expecting them to actually be Jesus himself. But this was out of line. Has anyone else experienced that?
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people have bad days.
We all have moments like that.
I’m not sure what you want out of this post? I don’t think it warrants any action
 
mrsdizzyd said:
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Camehome4john6:
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AlruwhAlquds:
Bow on both knees, get on your right knee then your left (right knee first).
Click to expand...
If I had to get down on both knees adoration would be very much disturbed when people would have to try to get me back up.
Click to expand...
Sometimes it’s all I can do to half genuflect let alone kneel for long periods or go down on both knees. I sure hope people aren’t judging me for it.
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Same here. Some of these things are taught as rules but are nothing of the kind, just what good Sister taught. like that even worse one about not chewing the Host…
 
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TK421 said:
I use my kindle and phone for reading or looking up prayers.
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I use my phone in most Adoration chapels. There is one with poor Internet access, but I have some prayers saved in my Android Notes so I don’t need the Internet to pull them up. Quite a few other people use phones or iPads also with various prayer apps. Nothing wrong with that.

Most people put their phone on silent but occasionally someone forgets. Like I said above, the chapels I visit most frequently often have outside noise anyway. One is attached to the main church and separated by only a glass wall so we get everything from the music ministry practicing to people having conversations in the hall outside, and the other has windows looking out on some areas where people are often cutting through on their way to the school or the parking lot or the street so we get to hear conversations, school kids yelling like kids do, etc. It’s just part of living.
 
Conversation, ideas and to see what comes of it. So far someone who is a convert asked about adoration etiquette (which looks likes that was helpful) and I got some support in my thought process. Life isn’t that black and white. If we operated like robots 24/7 it might not be easy for good to come out of tough situations.

If you are not sure what I want, read the last question. Don’t like that I don’t think like you and posted something like this? Well, I can’t help what you like or don’t like.
 
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