School bans 9-year-old boy's My Little Pony backpack

[signit]

But why isn’t it the responsibility of the kid to remove the problem? Get rid of the backpack. Get rid of the problem. Haven’t you heard about picking your battles? He’s not making a political or religious stances. It’s just a backpack. He.IS.A.BOY. He is inviting trouble.

I saw sooooo many people here say they were bullied while in school. Were you bullied, or were you teased? There is a big difference. This kid is being teased because he is carrying a backpack designed for little girls. Stop carrying the girls backpack and the problem is solved. Why is that so hard?

We seem to have two issues here.

Maybe the boy “should” stop carrying the backpack because that would stop the bullying/teasing. That’s probably what I would do.

But he didn’t stop carrying the backpack,the school had three options: (1) do nothing; (2) take the opportunity to speak to the bullies and maybe teach a life lesson; (3) require him to stop carrying the backpack. That’s the part I don’t agree with.

 

[Dulcinea2721]

And did anyone ever answer their opinions on this issue if it concerned a kids desire to wear a scapular or multiple medals.

If the wearing of the scapular, or a medal or a cross or a crucifix or speaking out against something or a MLP lunchbag etc is very important to you then you have to not care about the bullying.

If the bullying matters to you then you are more discreet about your marginalising thoughts or behaviours.

This is not to say that the bullying should not be addressed. It should. The fact remains that there will always be bullies. Barring incarceration and removal from society some kids take a long time to change if ever.

Adults too for that matter.

 

[J_Peterson]

Used to be that a bully beat you up or physically hurt you in some way.

But now the two words are interchangeable.

What ever happened to, “sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me?”

That little bit of “wisdom” is a lie. Verbal AND physical abuse leave a mark that does not go away.

 

[maryjk]

That little bit of “wisdom” is a lie. Verbal AND physical abuse leave a mark that does not go away.

Abuse? I thought we were talking about teasing. Teasing only leaves a mark if you allow it.

We have gone from teasing to bullying to abuse.

The boys said some mean things to him. That is teasing.

 

[Cat]

Who’s to say what’s a “girl’s backpack” or a “feminine object”?

That’s a label put on it by the little boys.

If the backpack had pictures of figure skating, would it still be a girl’s backpack, because after all that’s a women’s sport and of course little boys should like manly sports?

And even so, does that justify the bullying?

I agree; I’d say the kid who would make a comment like that is more in need of correction than the kid wearing the backpack.

Well, of course we all agree that this sort of childhood bullying is not nearly as bad as rape, which is a crime and one of the worst acts imaginable.

But the principle is the same, that is, not trying to correct the perpetrator.

FIGURE SKATING is NOT a woman’s sport!

HIstorically, the sport was a man’s sport. usfsa.org/About.asp?id=101

Every figure skating fan knows that the modern sport of figure skating was created and popularized by Jackson Haines, a man, back in the 19th Century.

Currently, there are five disciplines recognized by the International Skating Union (ISU):

Mens’ Singles
Ladies Singles
Pairs
Ice Dance
Synchronized

The only event in the list above that does not admit men is “Ladies Singles.”

All of the other four events include men, and indeed, Pairs and Dance REQUIRE a man.

(Same-sex couples may compete in the Ice Skating Institute competitions–this organization is the international RECREATIONAL figure skating organization. Same-sex couples may also compete in the Gay Games, which will be held in Cleveland this summer.)

My husband, an ice dancer, proudly wears figure skating apparel (t-shirts, sweat shirts, warm-ups, jackets). Many other MEN do the same.

Boys who figure skate do get made fun of by peers and by GROWN MEN. I think it’s obvious that children learn to make fun of male figure skaters from these grown men, many of which are fathers who should know better. This seems to be mainly an issue in the United States, as many other countries, including Canada, honor their boys and men who figure skate. Perhaps one reason why men make fun of male figure skating is that some people apparently harbor the incorrect idea that figure skating is a “woman’s sport.”

 

[J_Peterson]

Abuse? I thought we were talking about teasing. Teasing only leaves a mark if you allow it.

We have gone from teasing to bullying to abuse.

The boys said some mean things to him. That is teasing.

I’m sorry but you are wrong. You can roll your eyes all you want. We are talking about bullying. Teasing is done to make the person being teased laugh. I tease my fiance and she teases me, the end result is that we laugh a lot. Bullying is abuse plain and simple. Only one side is laughing when bullying is involved. Maybe if you were bullied you’d have a different opinion on the matter.

 

[Cat]

Wow. 7 pages for this “news”

What a story!

Meanwhile the world continues to turn and we are one moment closer to Jesus’ return.

Yes, indeed, we are.

Do you have children?

This is real-life for many families! Bullying is a painful experience that many children endure, and parents are often at their wits’ end to help their children. Teachers are fed a plethora of the latest psychobabble “theories” about bullying, and are forbidden to do any kind of strong-arm discipline that would possibly take away a bully’s power.

Many parents end up removing their children from schools and either home-schooling or sacrificing to send their children to a private school. The family life is upended, and children end up carrying the scars of bullying into their adult lives. I know I do!

I personally believe that the mother in this situation exacerbated the situation to fulfill some kind of “equality of the sexes/sexual orientations” agenda that she is harboring. I agree with many posters that at the first incident of bullying, the parents should have given the child a different backpack. I also agree that giving him a different backpack probably wouldn’t have helped, because once a kid becomes a bully target, it won’t stop, and probably the parents should have removed the child from the school and given him a fresh start in another school or at home.

Yes, we should joyfully anticipate Jesus’s return, but in the meantime, we all live on Planet Earth in bodies of flesh, and we have to learn to deal with the situations of THIS world.

 

[maryjk]

I’m sorry but you are wrong. You can roll your eyes all you want. We are talking about bullying. Teasing is done to make the person being teased laugh. I tease my fiance and she teases me, the end result is that we laugh a lot. Bullying is abuse plain and simple. Only one side is laughing when bullying is involved. Maybe if you were bullied you’d have a different opinion on the matter.

As I said, we called it teasing, back in the day.

Yep, I received reduced or free lunches, wore what are now called “Wal-Mart” clothes, also wore glasses. Got teased endlessly about it. I had one friend in middle school.

Grew up a little, stopped “buying” lunch, babysat for money to buy clothes and contacts. Teasing stopped.

Nowadays we are raising our children to believe that everyone must be nice to them. Everyone must play with them. Everyone is their friend. If one person says one negative thing to them, the world ends.

We need to stop creating victims.

This child is old enough to have been told, “NO, you are not taking a My Little Pony bag to school.”

 

[signit]

FIGURE SKATING is NOT a woman’s sport!

…

Boys who figure skate do get made fun of by peers and by GROWN MEN. I think it’s obvious that children learn to make fun of male figure skaters from these grown men, many of which are fathers who should know better. This seems to be mainly an issue in the United States, as many other countries, including Canada, honor their boys and men who figure skate. Perhaps one reason why men make fun of male figure skating is that some people apparently harbor the incorrect idea that figure skating is a “woman’s sport.”

Of course I’m in total agreement with you.

I wasn’t expressing my personal opinion, just trying to think of a quick example of something else some boys might think of as not masculine. I was being a little sarcastic saying peers “after all” know it’s a woman’s sport.

 

[savedbygrace71]

I’m torn on this issue. I have two boys, both of whom enjoy my little pony, the show. I like it too. But once my younger son, aged four, desperately wanted a rainbow dash stuffed animal and I just couldn’t do it. I felt stuck. Hypocritical, but I just felt like I couldn’t do it. My older son is already “anti-pink” from the influence of his friends at school. But it just seems wrong. Girls can like superheroes and ninjago with no problem, why can’t boys like MLP? I hate the idea of either the school or the mom forcing him one way or another. As much as my ideals say, let him keep his bag, in my heart, I doubt my husband or I would have bought it in the first place which kind of makes me feel bad for some reason. I want my kids’ interests to be their own, not fully directed by me. But at the same time, a little self preservation is useful too.

There is a meme I love, which I have, but don’t know how to share here lol.

One dad says to another, you can’t give your son a doll! It’s a girls toy!! He might grow up to be a…a…
The other dad says, a DAD?

 

[ringil]

Abuse? I thought we were talking about teasing. Teasing only leaves a mark if you allow it.

We have gone from teasing to bullying to abuse.

The boys said some mean things to him. That is teasing.

That is not correct.

After about age 7 parents stop being the main psychological influence on kids and their peers become the focus. This is child development and is essential to the development of a social self.

Children do not have the ability to “allow or not allow” verbal or physical abuse to hurt them. They simply do not have the cognitive structures for this. They come with development and brain growth.

What you call teasing can have life-long psychological effects on an individual.

 

[J_Peterson]

As I said, we called it teasing, back in the day.

Yep, I received reduced or free lunches, wore what are now called “Wal-Mart” clothes, also wore glasses. Got teased endlessly about it. I had one friend in middle school.

Grew up a little, stopped “buying” lunch, babysat for money to buy clothes and contacts. Teasing stopped.

Nowadays we are raising our children to believe that everyone must be nice to them. Everyone must play with them. Everyone is their friend. If one person says one negative thing to them, the world ends.

We need to stop creating victims.

This child is old enough to have been told, “NO, you are not taking a My Little Pony bag to school.”

I was not raised today, I’m 40. My mom knew nothing about the bullying as I was too ashamed to say anything about it and the school probably saw it as “teasing” and not enough of a big deal to tell my parents about it. So don’t lay it on my parents. I was taught to not make fun of others and was corrected when I got caught.

If only Gregory from my 9th grade art class knew they were only teasing him. Perhaps he wouldn’t have shot himself.

 

[ringil]

I was not raised today, I’m 40. My mom knew nothing about the bullying as I was too ashamed to say anything about it and the school probably saw it as “teasing” and not enough of a big deal to tell my parents about it. So don’t lay it on my parents. I was taught to not make fun of others and was corrected when I got caught.

If only Gregory from my 9th grade art class knew they were only teasing him. Perhaps he wouldn’t have shot himself.

Indeed, I pray for Gregory.

I am legally blind and my eyes have an irregular appearance. I was teased mercilessly in middle school.

It took me until early adulthood, with my education and general maturity, to be able to resolve the psychological damage done.

Another important point is that bullies create bullies.

 

[St_Francis]

As I said, we called it teasing, back in the day.

Yep, I received reduced or free lunches, wore what are now called “Wal-Mart” clothes, also wore glasses. Got teased endlessly about it. I had one friend in middle school.

Grew up a little, stopped “buying” lunch, babysat for money to buy clothes and contacts. Teasing stopped.

**Nowadays we are raising our children to believe that everyone must be nice to them. Everyone must play with them. Everyone is their friend. If one person says one negative thing to them, the world ends.

We need to stop creating victims.**

This child is old enough to have been told, “NO, you are not taking a My Little Pony bag to school.”

While I do think that children and adults need to learn that not everyone is nice, and learn to deal with people who are not nice, imo schools have a responsibility to protect students and to require good behavior. Children do not go to school because they wantto, they go to school because they are required to. If they are required to go, the powers that be need to provide a safe and secure environment.

 

[maryjk]

That is not correct.

After about age 7 parents stop being the main psychological influence on kids and their peers become the focus. This is child development and is essential to the development of a social self.

Children do not have the ability to “allow or not allow” verbal or physical abuse to hurt them. They simply do not have the cognitive structures for this. They come with development and brain growth.

What you call teasing can have life-long psychological effects on an individual.

What I call teasing has been part of growing up, pretty much forever. Fat, thin, rich, poor, glasses, braces, or ever wearing the wrong clothes. Chances are you will be teased about one of these things while you are in school.

Talk to any adult and they will have been teased, known someone that was teased or teased someone.

Cognitive structures or not, most kids can deal with teasing then they are 9. Although, most move on from whatever they are being teased about, if they can. (Hey, kid, dump the bag.)

 

[Phemie]

Abuse? I thought we were talking about teasing. Teasing only leaves a mark if you allow it.

We have gone from teasing to bullying to abuse.

The boys said some mean things to him. That is teasing.

A lot of abuse has occurred over the years under the ‘teasing’ banner. If it hurts it’s not teasing, it’s bullying. The only ones who promote this idea are the ones doing it, not the ones subject to it.

 

[maryjk]

A lot of abuse has occurred over the years under the ‘teasing’ banner. If it hurts it’s not teasing, it’s bullying. The only ones who promote this idea are the ones doing it, not the ones subject to it.

So I am a bully?

Teasing is different from bullying and that is different from abuse. If you had ever been abused, you would know the difference.

 

[Faith1960]

USA Today:

Ai, ai, ai!
I know anti-bullying programs seem to ficus on certain kinds of victims but children are vicious and will bully anyone for any reason; being fat, short, too dumb, too smart or in this case being a brony.

What’s a “brony?” Boys who are into My Little Pony?

 

[Faith1960]

I’m getting the sense that the boy’s mom wouldn’t let him have a new backpack even if he asked her for one. I mean, let’s be honest here: the article states the boy didn’t even want to get out of the car because the other kids were too mean (aka, he was too scared to go to school). I can’t think of anyone, let alone a nine year old child, who would not be trying to get rid of the article of the bullies’ ridicule by that point. I can only assume he asked his mom for a new backpack and she forced him to “stand his ground.”

That’s just my gut feeling on the issue. Poor kid. She’s right about the bullying, but she’s wrong to force her child to endure a crusade like that. I speculate, of course, but I don’t think I’m off target here.

Even if he gets a new backpack, the kids are going to keep picking on him because he HAD it in the first place. His parents never should have let him bring it to school.

 

[Mary_Gail_36]

While I do think that children and adults need to learn that not everyone is nice, and learn to deal with people who are not nice, imo schools have a responsibility to protect students and to require good behavior. Children do not go to school because they wantto, they go to school because they are required to. If they are required to go, the powers that be need to provide a safe and secure environment.

I agree.

The poor boy had a backpack that others didn’t like. So they called him names, pushed him, and told him to kill himself.

I would think punishing the kids who were mean would be obvious.

This is the offensive backpack. It seems pretty innocuous to me:shrug:, perhaps a bit juvenile for a 9 year old, http://assets.nydailynews.com/polop...n/derivatives/landscape_635/pony20n-3-web.jpg