ValPal, I want to say before my reply to this post that I understand you’re a bit outnumbered here and I hope it doesn’t seem as though the replies are attacking you or your personal opinion. As another poster said, I don’t think this thread is meant to become some a sort of competition over who has the higher sex drive (I don’t think a definitive answer can be reached as long as double standards are in place), but it simply seeks to combat a certain stereotype and assure the many women who don’t fit into it that there is nothing abnormal about their natures.
I read this link you provided,
carlsonschool.umn.edu/Assets/71520.pdf
and I what I noticed was that the entire premise of the authors’ conclusions mostly glossed over the psycho-social aspects of female desire as if they were of little significance. It appeared to take a very superficial view of current sexual activity to make its case and yet neglected to delve much into opposing perspectives which are not quite as noticeable. It also did not even touch upon the cause-and-effect of external stimulation that factors into the frequency of male vs female sexual thought.
In the second link, the conclusion was also based upon the same model asking men and women for a direct admission regarding their sexual desire without taking into consideration the psycho-social barriers that may impede an honest answer. It’s not to say that
all women who participate in these questionnaires are lying, but it’s quite possible that many of them are voicing programmed answers. Meaning, women may attempt to predict what their answers will say about them as moral women, and answer according to how they think they are
supposed to answer, based upon what they feel is a more proper or expected response. Even among my closest friends (who, although they are more cultural rather than devout Cathoilics, are still what society would deem to be “ladies”) the most revealing questions/concerns regarding sexuality have come about when we were enjoying a few glasses of wine. In other words, women are often more honest during these types of conversations when their inhibitions are down.
And as far as the question “Actual number of sexual partners: Men, six to eight. Women, four [source: Kinsey Institute].” goes. . . . .there’s a popular phrase with regards to number of partners that says “Men lie up, women lie down”. This phrase addresses the idea that the telling of a lie must include a motive for personal gain, which in this case would be lack of condmenation or increased perceived value to the opposite sex. These intangible motives are created by a society that assigns worth to individuals, and not by any biological occurrence. I would stand by my original thought that almost everything goes back to societal nurture, rather than nature.
Please folks, no need to argue!
And Blue Horizon: I was just wondering about resources with practical advice rather than philosophy. Of course I realize that traditional theology is very true, but it is mostly philosophy and “orders” rather than simple practical advice on how to obey and stay chaste.
OP, I think that regardless of whether or not the philosophy equally addresses the sexual nature of both men and women, the advice given is good and can be applied to both. Attempting to view the opposite gender as a child of God, as opposed to viewing them as a tool for sexual release, respecting the sexual act within the context of a marriage in which both parties sacrifice for the other, thinking of intimacy as a unitive act rathern than as a sole opportunity for pleasure, distracting oneself toward more productive tasks when the urge presents itself, etc. - this is the same kind of thinking women can follow as well.
Is that what you’re looking for? I’m not sure - it seems as though you’re asking for something more specific, but I don’t know what that is. Could you elaborate with examples?
).
Women’s sex drive is closer to the amount of men’s sex drive than what people think or what tradition says. People can argue for ever which one has the stronger sex drive, but I say generally for sure women’s sex drive is a lot closer to, if not equal to, men’s sex drive than society has taught in the past and some individual women’s sex drive can be stronger than some individual men’s sex drive, and a lot of women have equal drive as men. 