Sexism goes both ways

[october_baby]

Not so much the article itself…I’m fed up with the way men are portrayed in the media as well.
This whole chilling on the couch with a beer watching the game or playing endless hours of COD on the XBox…while wifey is being super mom is ridiculous.

It’s this little gem from a Women’s Studies professor at the end that just screams progressive liberalism…

Yeah, okay.

She’s probably in the same camp of women who thinks that a SAHM is not a real job and we should break free from the chains of oppression that our husbands keep us locked up in so we can go out into the real world and find careers of our own.

I think the quote from the women’s studies professor sums up the crux of the problem
of contemporary America.

 

[jmcrae]

Thanks for this post, I know and understand that to be true, it just doesn’t make it any less frustrating. My brother doesn’t dress “gangsta” at all. He says it is worst in the winter because he is wearing a hat and or hoodie because its cold not because he has an interest in robbing or beating up anybody. My heart breaks for what he goes through sometimes. Even though I’m also in my 20’s I think young women in some cases have it easier, I’m not identified as the same type of threat my brother is or my boyfriend’s son.

The good news is that he will age out of it, and things will get easier once he gets a bit of gray in his hair. Meanwhile, he has to work harder than everyone else, be more polite than necessary, and dress better than expected - and it’s totally not fair, but it’s how he will stay employed long enough to get a track record that can speak for itself.

 

[Kamaduck]

The reaction of people around your brother may well be due to his gender and age, more than due to his race.

As a Youth Worker, I am well aware of the prejudice against young men of every race. They pay a premium on car insurance because society assumes that they can’t or won’t drive safely.

Young men of every race are generally seen in society as “dangerous” and possibly “out of control.” How he dresses may unfortunately be part of the equation, as well - if he is dressed “gangsta” style, he will get a more negative reaction than if he’s dressed “business casual.”

This… I think it gets tricky when racial and gender power structures intersect. Women are told over and over that men can hurt them if they’re not careful, that they can be assaulted/raped/murdered by men if they don’t take precautions. That goes double for young men and POC. I know if I were alone in an elevator with a man I didn’t know, I’d be a little on edge regardless of race or manner of dress. It’s not fair to guys, no- but it’s what our society teaches us.

I think that’s part of why negative ideas about members of oppressive groups can also be harmful- just because someone is male doesn’t mean they aren’t unjustly discriminated against. We want to protect ourselves, so we don’t stop to consider what affect our actions may have on them. It’s very sad.

 

[Miss_Felicity]

This… I think it gets tricky when racial and gender power structures intersect. Women are told over and over that men can hurt them if they’re not careful, that they can be assaulted/raped/murdered by men if they don’t take precautions. That goes double for young men and POC. I know if I were alone in an elevator with a man I didn’t know, I’d be a little on edge regardless of race or manner of dress. It’s not fair to guys, no- but it’s what our society teaches us.

I think that’s part of why negative ideas about members of oppressive groups can also be harmful- just because someone is male doesn’t mean they aren’t unjustly discriminated against. We want to protect ourselves, so we don’t stop to consider what affect our actions may have on them. It’s very sad.

Thank You. I really appreciate your honesty. It is difficult when power structures intersect, I’ve been uncomfortable in certain spaces with men that I didn’t know as well and it is sad because on one hand your safety and self preservation is concern number one but on the other hand you have to always keep in the back of your mind that fear politics have taught “safety” for a long time. Its easier to instill too much fear, especially into women than to train us to follow our gut closely and to avoid potentially dangerous situations.

 

[Kelfa28]

This… I think it gets tricky when racial and gender power structures intersect. Women are told over and over that men can hurt them if they’re not careful, that they can be assaulted/raped/murdered by men if they don’t take precautions. That goes double for young men and POC. I know if I were alone in an elevator with a man I didn’t know, I’d be a little on edge regardless of race or manner of dress. It’s not fair to guys, no- but it’s what our society teaches us.

I think that’s part of why negative ideas about members of oppressive groups can also be harmful- just because someone is male doesn’t mean they aren’t unjustly discriminated against. We want to protect ourselves, so we don’t stop to consider what affect our actions may have on them. It’s very sad.

A big thing that has been coming to light recently is rape in the military. We hear the stories of women being raped seemingly left and right, especially during deployments, and this is very true but one thing that hasn’t been brought up is the fact that 56% of all rape victims in the military…are men but we never hear about it.
Talk about oppression and shame against men.

A vast majority of them do not get reported. The ones that do get reported are rarely even brought to trial…let alone convicted.
Many of the victims that do report the crime end up discharged from the military for erroneous reasons that make it difficult to obtain proper medical treatment and care.
The rapists themselves are rarely punished and usually promoted and remain in the military…likely serving a “distinguished” career and allotted all the benefits a retired vet is granted.

Let me remind you…that while females are frequently the victims of these awful crimes…men are just as likely, if not more likely to be the victims of rape in the military and just as likely, if not more likely that they very rarely see justice served.
If that isn’t Sexism against men and oppression against men, I don’t know what is.

 

[jmcrae]

Let me remind you…that while females are frequently the victims of these awful crimes…men are just as likely, if not more likely to be the victims of rape in the military and just as likely, if not more likely that they very rarely see justice served.
If that isn’t Sexism against men and oppression against men, I don’t know what is.

This is absolutely true. Men are also victims of domestic violence, and often don’t report it out of shame and embarrassment - a man getting beaten up by his wife is a lot less likely to be taken seriously than a woman being beaten up by her husband.

And it’s an obvious fact that men are far more likely to be attacked by strangers than women - bar fights, road rage, drug deals gone bad, etc. - stranger violence is typically man against man.

 

[Kelfa28]

This is absolutely true. Men are also victims of domestic violence, and often don’t report it out of shame and embarrassment - a man getting beaten up by his wife is a lot less likely to be taken seriously than a woman being beaten up by her husband.

And it’s an obvious fact that men are far more likely to be attacked by strangers than women - bar fights, road rage, drug deals gone bad, etc. - stranger violence is typically man against man.

Exactly.

It’s a huge stigma against men because it’s incredibly hard for some to understand that it is actually possible for a man to be a victim of both sexual and physical abuse by a woman or another man.

It’s seems to be such a taboo subject across the board and that is so unfortunate.

You don’t hear about men’s shelters like you do about women’s shelters.

In the same respect. A single male cannot get the same benefits that a single female can get in terms of assistance. The chances of a single male getting free housing and a chance to go to college for free in order to better himself…is just not very likely.

 

[Kamaduck]

A big thing that has been coming to light recently is rape in the military. We hear the stories of women being raped seemingly left and right, especially during deployments, and this is very true but one thing that hasn’t been brought up is the fact that 56% of all rape victims in the military…are men but we never hear about it.
Talk about oppression and shame against men.

A vast majority of them do not get reported. The ones that do get reported are rarely even brought to trial…let alone convicted.
Many of the victims that do report the crime end up discharged from the military for erroneous reasons that make it difficult to obtain proper medical treatment and care.
The rapists themselves are rarely punished and usually promoted and remain in the military…likely serving a “distinguished” career and allotted all the benefits a retired vet is granted.

Let me remind you…that while females are frequently the victims of these awful crimes…men are just as likely, if not more likely to be the victims of rape in the military and just as likely, if not more likely that they very rarely see justice served.
If that isn’t Sexism against men and oppression against men, I don’t know what is.

And this is why I think the whole “oppressor/oppressed” dynamic has gotten more complex lately. Each gender has different societal forces working against them.

But I do think that, on a daily basis, women are more afraid of being violated, because they have heard many stories about that happening to other women. Men may be just as much at risk, but they are not expecting it on a daily basis precisely because the many incidents of it go unreported.

I know I saw an infographic about rape once that claimed only 1% of rapists actually went to prison. The vast majority were not even reported, and of those reported, relatively few faced trial.

 

[Mimi20]

There have been plenty of commercials making men look like idiots for years, but that’s the most downright obvious one I’ve ever seen.
This is an old clip from a tv segment that no longer airs but it made fun of the fact how husbands are portrayed in commercials.
youtube.com/watch?v=a7vtyheqPVU

 

[Baelor]

It’s an ad. A bad ad, but still merely an ad.

I do not like sexism, but someone who is 40 is less likely to change perspective than someone who is 14. Perhaps mental energy and effort would be better spent on educating young’uns?

 

[Kamaduck]

It’s an ad. A bad ad, but still merely an ad.

I do not like sexism, but someone who is 40 is less likely to change perspective than someone who is 14. Perhaps mental energy and effort would be better spent on educating young’uns?

I’m 16, does that mean I can complain about it?

In all seriousness, I don’t think we should ignore sexism in any form. Media like this does shape our beliefs about the world. We remember it and add it to our observations of how men and women behave.

Earlier this year, my religion teacher made a habit of telling sexist (and racist, although that was less common) jokes. Standard stuff, but it made the class both offensive and uncomfortable for me. I wasn’t going to call him on it because they were “just” jokes and didn’t want to look too sensitive. But he didn’t stop, so I eventually confronted him outside of class. After that, he stopped. It was actually really easy.

I don’t think we can expect advertisers to do better in the future unless we complain when they do a poor job. Like my religion teacher, they’re not going to stop unless we alert them that they are losing customers by offending them.

 

[chevalier]

There have been plenty of commercials making men look like idiots for years, but that’s the most downright obvious one I’ve ever seen.
This is an old clip from a tv segment that no longer airs but it made fun of the fact how husbands are portrayed in commercials.
youtube.com/watch?v=a7vtyheqPVU

Even though the commercial under that link was intended to berate and deride men, in fact, it did manage to convey a message about the speaker’s proverbial picker. ‘Serving beer to babes,’ was one of the reasons she thought he was cool. Then she spent several years trying to ‘land’ a ‘single guy who was driving his lovely car’.

Stupidity leads to getting hurt.

 

[jmcrae]

Even though the commercial under that link was intended to berate and deride men, in fact, it did manage to convey a message about the speaker’s proverbial picker. ‘Serving beer to babes,’ was one of the reasons she thought he was cool. Then she spent several years trying to ‘land’ a ‘single guy who was driving his lovely car’.

Stupidity leads to getting hurt.

I hope you recognized that the whole thing was intended to be a satire about advertising (single men are portrayed as “cool” but married men are portrayed as “klutzes”) and not an actual testimony about her own marriage.

 

[Mimi20]

Even though the commercial under that link was intended to berate and deride men, in fact, it did manage to convey a message about the speaker’s proverbial picker. ‘Serving beer to babes,’ was one of the reasons she thought he was cool. Then she spent several years trying to ‘land’ a ‘single guy who was driving his lovely car’.

Stupidity leads to getting hurt.

Jmcrae explains the clip but, yes, stupidity does have that effect.

I hope you recognized that the whole thing was intended to be a satire about advertising (single men are portrayed as “cool” but married men are portrayed as “klutzes”) and not an actual testimony about her own marriage.

Exactly.
“Then he met you and got married. Now he’s slightly dumber than a duck.”

 

[Sarcelle]

I know you don’t agree with this mindset…and, yes, I recognize that I was being a bit facetious with my verbiage. I don’t know this women from adam…but I know she is making wildly inaccurate statements based on her ideas on what “fact” is.

The problem I have with your reasoning is that the Left (nor the Right) can make up their own language and pawn it off as the correct meaning to general society.

This is not what Racism and Sexism actually is. It’s just their convoluted idea of what it should be.
You cannot honestly say that Sexism and Racism just don’t apply to certain “oppressed” classes just because, according to some people, they are oppressed.

I don’t think the general numbers of society’s reality back this claim up. The fact is more women are graduating from college then men now. The fact is more and more women are working then ever before and more and more men are being laid off and losing their jobs.

The fact is there are more and more cases of minorities attacking and harming white people and other minority groups due to racism now too. They just don’t get reported very often.

So when does it end? When will the left be satisfied with the need to bring down the all mighty white male class? When will they quit saying that white men are actually the oppressors and not the oppressed?
When these white men are wiped off the face of the planet? A final sacrifice that they deserve…to get what has always been coming to them?

Source? More and more cases huh?

How do you define minority? Is it the doctor from India going to work or the migrant laborer from Guatemala?

How did this thread go from sexism against men to the minorities attacking white people?

 

[Sarcelle]

Not buying that for a dollar, I told you that the statements you were making are very hurtful and dangerous but you have the right to believe what you want to believe. You are entitled to your opinions. Even if those opinions perpetuate ugly things and are some of the reason my younger brother can’t get on the elevator in the building of some of his work sites without white women clutching their purse,he can’t pull up in his car at at gas station without certain people locking their doors. I think they agree with you that minority youth have an axe to grind with white people.

I will agree with you power structure isn’t based completely on race or gender and that is an over simplification but lets not pretend it doesn’t play a role because it does.

I have been looked at with suspicion because my ethnicity screams Muslim. Christianity is not just a religion for white people.

I think the one factor that affects people more than race or ethnicity is class, social class.

So a doctor from India who is making good money as a cardiologist certainly cannot be lumped with a migrant worker from Mexico although they are both classified as “minorities”.

Now don’t get me wrong. All people regardless of education, sex, age, ethnic or racial background deserve to be treated with respect. This is why I call bigotry an equal opportunity employer. Anyone, young, old, educated, uneducated, male or female, white or otherwise can be bigot.

 

[Kamaduck]

How did this thread go from sexism against men to the minorities attacking white people?

I guess it was around post 4 that racism entered the discussion…

You make a good point about social class. I always assumed that crime was linked to poverty, and that poverty was, unfortunately, still more common among certain racial groups.

I bet the correlation between poverty and crime is higher than the correlation between any entire racial group and crime, but I have nothing to back that up.

 

[jmcrae]

I bet the correlation between poverty and crime is higher than the correlation between any entire racial group and crime, but I have nothing to back that up.

Rich people have better lawyers.

 

[Kamaduck]

Rich people have better lawyers.

This is true. Darn real-world facts, being affected by everything.

Maybe rich people are just better at hiding their crimes?

 

[jmcrae]

This is true. Darn real-world facts, being affected by everything.

Maybe rich people are just better at hiding their crimes?

In the sense that they can avoid the media spotlight, certainly.