There are a lot of things that have happened in our relationship that may or may not be of an interest to people. I just didn’t want to bore people or make it look like a put an emphasis on past negativity.
I agree, her boyfriend does not sound to be on the absolute side of asexuality, but perhaps on the asexual spectrum, the spectrum of orientations between asexual and allosexual (also known as gray asexuality). For example, there is one orientation which involves being sexually attracted only to strangers, losing sexual attraction when one gets into a committed relationship. This sounds like a possibility. The name escapes me, but I will look for it.
As I said in my previous post, I strongly recommended you seek a professional third opinion. Since you state here that you have a traumatic past that makes communication difficult, I wish to reemphasize this point.
As a whole, the marriage may be on a path to a loving and healthy relationship, even if sexual intimacy is limited. However, seeking help in developing communication skills and addressing a major marriage issue like sex before exchanging vows will only help the marriage take a positive path!
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