Should I forgive someone for something they did to hurt me even if they aren’t sorry for it?

[StudentMI]

I would say yes you should. Forgiveness really does help personally speaking. Also remember that God lets the sun shine on the just and unjust alike.

 

[Zaccheus]

Zaccheus:

Not all accept His forgivenes

No. Not all ask for it.

I’m not sure what distinction you’re making.

 

[goout]

Zaccheus:

If I forgive, I give up the grudge. I give up the right to be angry or to hate the offender.

We are commanded not to hate. And anger in itself is not a sin.

You’re imposing psychology onto theology.

Psychology and theology can work together properly.

 

[Julius_Caesar]

Psychology and theology can work together properly.

That’s like saying you can fit a square peg in a round hole.

 

[goout]

goout:

Psychology and theology can work together properly.

That’s like saying you can fit a square peg in a round hole.

What do you mean? Is psychology not a legitimate discipline?
What about Catholic counselors? What about spiritual direction? What about advice in the confessional?

 

[Julius_Caesar]

Is psychology not a legitimate discipline?

Yes. But it’s separate from theology.

 

[Randolph]

Yes. Forgive this person even if they are not sorry.

That is different from saying that your relationship with this person can and/or should go back to the way it was. That may or may not be possible or advisable.

Yes. Wisdom throughout the ages often echoes this sentiment.

 

[Zaccheus]

goout:

Is psychology not a legitimate discipline?

Yes. But it’s separate from theology.

Of course it’s separate. That doesn’t mean they can’t work together.

 

[mary15]

“Father forgive them, for they know not what they do”

Put your eyes on the cross, always and for all things.

Follow Jesus, mediate on the sorrowful mysteries to draw you closer to Him and what He had to endure from others who weren’t sorry either!

Its simple, yet often hard to see life this way. It takes practice and lots of prayer and requests for being given the graces and virtues necessary for your overcoming your particular situation. Pray for Mary to intercede for you, pray to your Guardian Angel, and Patron Saint as well for fortitude, increased charity, love and hope for example.

Pray to the Holy spirit also, to help you be able to discern what it is that you should do.

Praying, reading scripture and spiritual readings often open up the truth for one who is seeking to find.

 

[Julius_Caesar]

Father forgive them, for they know not what they do”

Praying for forgiveness is not forgiving.

 

[Julius_Caesar]

That doesn’t mean they can’t work together.

Not when God’s clear teaching is violated.

 

[Zaccheus]

mary15:

Father forgive them, for they know not what they do”

Praying for forgiveness is not forgiving.

Praying for God to forogive me is not the same as forgiving. But how can I honestly pray asking God to forgive someone else who hurt me, if I refuse to forgive them myself?

…Or at least try honestly and hard to forgive, because of course emotion can get in the way.

 

[Zaccheus]

Zaccheus:

That doesn’t mean they can’t work together.

Not when God’s clear teaching is violated.

To violate God’s teaching is bad theology. But that doesn’t change the fact that something can be good theology and also good psychology.

 

[Julius_Caesar]

But how can I honestly pray asking God to forgive someone else who hurt me, if I refuse to forgive them myself?

Forgiveness is for those who ask. Even God operates like this.

 

[Julius_Caesar]

But that doesn’t change the fact that something can be good theology and also good psychology.

Well this ain’t it.

 

[Zaccheus]

Zaccheus:

But that doesn’t change the fact that something can be good theology and also good psychology.

Well this ain’t it.

Clearly we are not in agreement. I suspect misunderstanding.
I will drop the subject. May God bless and keep you.

 

[AnaCarolina7]

I would let them know you were offended. Then if the person still was not sorry i would forgive with my heart but from a distance.