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C
Catholic90
Guest
I have a brilliant pair of bright yellow speedo’s in my bottom drawer my brother bought for a joke, would it be fair for me to force others to restrain themselves should I fancy a “breezy” walk to get some tea bags? Bus, sleepover or not! I’m not responsible for them, simply doing them a favour.
You must be somewhat attached to this yellow speedo. Why would anyone wear a yellow speedo? Gift or not, get rid of it! No one, and I mean no one, ever wants to see anyone wear a speedo, much less a bright yellow one. Just pick it up, throw it in the garbage, and get rid of it. You will feel so much better.It is indeed. Just don’t get into a habit of argueing for the sake of argueing. Or I’ll mention my yellow speedo again.
Unless you secretly like wearing it…
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Darran
Guest
You must be somewhat attached to this yellow speedo. Why would anyone wear a yellow speedo? Gift or not, get rid of it! No one, and I mean no one, ever wants to see anyone wear a speedo, much less a bright yellow one. Just pick it up, throw it in the garbage, and get rid of it. You will feel so much better.
Unless you secretly like wearing it…
J
jilly4ski
Guest
I don’t understand this new fad of having teenagers and 20 years olds planing sleepovers. Vacations away, bad weather, other unforeseen difficulties are fine. But planning a party specifically for the sleepover aspect? And this is coming from someone who is in their mid twenties. OP, as someone his is relatively young, my mother did not allow coed sleepovers when I was 8, I don’t really see the point of avoiding coed sleepovers when you are 8 but going to them when you are 20. 
T
TheWatcher
Guest
Yes, I am an atheist. I wasn’t always an atheist and I don’t lack exposure to various Christian faiths, including the Catholic faith. No need to dismiss me as ignorant.
At some point, responsibility doesn’t need to be solely on the person who is being objectified. Dressing modest and being modest is charitable. I don’t consider sleeping in the same house any more immodest than sleeping in a hotel. Knowing someone is sleeping a room away isn’t a normal lust-inducing thing. If it is so for someone, perhaps they ought to remove themselves. They can’t expect the object of their desires to remove herself so as if not to tempt them.
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DexUK
Guest
I am just astonished and depressed at the lack of trust some people here seem to be showing in young people, as though being young and grouped together in one location at a certain time of day should have anything to do with whether any of these young people are likely to have sex with each other.
Surely projecting the expectation of sin upon someone is, itself, a sin?
Surely projecting the expectation of sin upon someone is, itself, a sin?
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Bookcat
Guest
I would note that I did not… (apologies if that was the impression)
I stand by what I posted and I wish you a very wonderful day!
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Bookcat
Guest
No…the person is seeking advice. And advice given.
Advice was given taking into account the details noted.
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Baelor
Guest
I am confused as to why a need must be present in this situation. Surely I can eat with my friends in my own home, but why not enjoy a meal out together? I need not go to the movies, but I certainly may enjoy doing so.
The real problem here lies with the oversexualization not on the part of young people, but of people who perceive others as nymphomaniacs without cause. In my friendship group, the number of times that sex has come up is precisely zero. I see no reason why others cannot have the same experience.
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Darran
Guest
You made me google that, now I need to clear my internet history :tsktsk:
In all fairness, speaking from inside - out as a 19 y/o I’ll be the first one to say that it would really be a mistake to underestimate this. Not so much from young women as opposed to young men. The way the world is currently is a hellish miasma, testosterome makes this much, much worse to break from.
Not to say that it must apply to this situation, just as a side-note.
A
andrewstx
Guest
A few years ago I was invited to a “retreat” hosted by a liberal Protestant church, and I went.
I put retreat in quotes because it wasn’t a retreat in the Catholic sense, just people getting togther on a lake far from a city.
I was shocked wheh I learned the sleeping arrangements. This was a large campground with one big cabin. Men and women slept together in the same rooms, no segregation at all by gender.
Husbands and wives shared beds, but so did unmaried boyfriends and girlfreinds. And it was accepted as perfectly normal every day thing. I don’t know if there was any hanky-panky going on, I got in my bed alone and just slept.
While the others were playing cards and fishing I made my own retreat with prayer, meditation and reflection.
By the reaction you would have thought I came from another planet.
No more Liberal Protestant retreats for this boy!
I put retreat in quotes because it wasn’t a retreat in the Catholic sense, just people getting togther on a lake far from a city.
I was shocked wheh I learned the sleeping arrangements. This was a large campground with one big cabin. Men and women slept together in the same rooms, no segregation at all by gender.
Husbands and wives shared beds, but so did unmaried boyfriends and girlfreinds. And it was accepted as perfectly normal every day thing. I don’t know if there was any hanky-panky going on, I got in my bed alone and just slept.
While the others were playing cards and fishing I made my own retreat with prayer, meditation and reflection.
By the reaction you would have thought I came from another planet.
No more Liberal Protestant retreats for this boy!
B
BettyBoop416
Guest
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Darran
Guest
Ah…that explains it.
No but seriously. Unless it’s a different situation in my neck of the woods compared to elsewhere, the majority of young lads scarcely understand lust as a bad thing. Most simply think they should act like animals. The only exceptions I know to this are my seminarian buddies and my more “unsuccessful” friends. Though ofcourse there are other exceptions, they are a minority.
If you think I am speaking with a bias, well, I can only speak from my personal experience in this country. I would be suspicious before doubting that this isn’t a modern universal mindset.
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DexUK
Guest
I am now despairing of the people who think the worst of young people and also the young people who, having been thought the worst of feel they might as well live up (or rather down) to the expectations placed in them by the older generations.
Chicken and egg situation I know, but surely the world can’t be going to hell in a handcart quite so quickly? Surely?
Chicken and egg situation I know, but surely the world can’t be going to hell in a handcart quite so quickly? Surely?
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LemonAndLime
Guest
I’m in my early twenties. The last time I had a sleepover was when I was 18, there was a big group of us who all went to someone’s house, had a few drinks (legal drinking age here in the UK is 18) watched some scary films and then all slept in sleeping bags around the house, and this was for new years eve. We were a close group of friends and I trusted every single male there as they had been friends for years. Nothing sexual happened and we all had a good time.
Now, in my twenties I have been out drinking with female friends and some of them have slept over due to them living too far away. I wouldn’t describe it as a sleepover. It seems very immature for someone your age. I wouldn’t dream of explicitly inviting a group of people my age to come over with sleepingbags and stay up late watching films. But then, the drinking age is different in the UK compared with the US so perhaps the idea of a night out for people in their early twenties is thus different.
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Darran
Guest
Unfortunately it is Dex. You should be able to see this first hand in the UK. It would be naive to think that I am telling lies.
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DexUK
Guest
I’m afraid I simply don’t recognise that image of the world.
Of course we read a lot about criminal behaviour amongst youths, the incidence of teenage pregnancy, etc… but the actual percentage of young people engaging in such behaviour is tiny. Placed in wider perspective, I really don’t think young people are as bad as they are painted. Furthermore, I worry that if we persist in painting young people as being as bad as this then those that aren’t won’t see the point in keeping to the right path as they won’t see it being worth the effort if they are to be condemned anyway.
Of course we read a lot about criminal behaviour amongst youths, the incidence of teenage pregnancy, etc… but the actual percentage of young people engaging in such behaviour is tiny. Placed in wider perspective, I really don’t think young people are as bad as they are painted. Furthermore, I worry that if we persist in painting young people as being as bad as this then those that aren’t won’t see the point in keeping to the right path as they won’t see it being worth the effort if they are to be condemned anyway.
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Darran
Guest
Since you can’t believe me for whatever reason, I would encourage you to read what the bishops have to say about the matter. I’ve never seen anybody condenmed or even hinted at being condemned for what they do in this way. The only time I was ever told it was wrong was from 1 RE class in first year or so. Apart from that, God forbid, I could have gotten into the same mess as the rest of them. That is a shocking reality.
If I have to be excused because I say it as it is from the perspective of a young person who belongs to this generation, then I don’t see how you would believe anyone else.
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bmullins
Guest
The problem is we tend to be using terms such as “Kids these day’s really aren’t all that bad” in a measurement of how the world sees bad. When we really have to look at it from God’s point of view, not ours. By not so bad, do we mean they aren’t out killing people? Or do we mean they aren’t out doing drugs? Some of them are. Or do we mean they aren’t out having unprotected sex? Some of them are. Or do we mean they aren’t lying to someone about where they are? Some of them are.
When we judge it on the standards of the world, I’m not such a bad guy… and really never have been. When we judge it on God’s standards… I’ve failed miserably. I’ve been a pretty rotten creature.
When we judge it on the standards of the world, I’m not such a bad guy… and really never have been. When we judge it on God’s standards… I’ve failed miserably. I’ve been a pretty rotten creature.
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Dakota_Roberts
Guest
Children these days are no worse than Gen X or Boomers*
*course that ain’t sayin’ much
*course that ain’t sayin’ much
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