Single People: What Qualities Do You Look For?

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austenbosten said:
Yeah that’s my point, I know you prefer a guy who’s taller that’s okay. I prefer a woman who’s “bigger” in other ways. However I’m just saying don’t let that be the deal-breaker cause you ladies could be losing out big time. Nothing wrong with preferences. 🙂

As for the tats…I don’t know why in the life of me ppl want tats? Your skin gets old and wrinkles and that “hot” Madonna tattoo you got 20 years ago looks like…well Madonna today (runs for toilet…wish there was a green sick emoticon). I guess it was the way my Father raised me and he had a tattoo and he regretted it everyday of his life (though he really didn’t have a choice in the matter when he got it) and I made a vow to him I’d never get a tattoo ever.
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Amen.
Nobody can really get away with anything come old age, whether that be tattoos, plastic surgery, wearing certain fashion trends, etc. I’m not a huge fan of tattoos, I can handle 1 or 2 but I** wouldn’t **dismiss a potential mate because of it, especially if its not in a noticeable area. A tattoo doesn’t change their personality. As for regrets? Oh yes, people have them. You either love the tattoo for life, or regret it for life. :doh2:
 
I haven’t been single since I was 20, but there were three things that would attract me to a guy:
  1. Looks ( tall, dark and handsome)
  2. Charm/ confidence - if he lacked somewhat in the first department he could compensate with this
  3. Intelligence - if he had 100% of 1&2 but lacked 3 he was written-off, immediately.
Now, what would make me stay is TONS of add-ons to 1,2&3.
Being a practicing Catholic would naturally follow from #3, or, would with time and some persuasion.

Aside from every virtue, I was also looking for humor, athleticism and older by at least 2 years.

I wish I still had my list but either way, one thing I know I didn’t include but wish I had: Godly upbringing and parents…
I won’t deny it, I’m picky.
 
runwaymodel said:
Amen.
Nobody can really get away with anything come old age, whether that be tattoos, plastic surgery, wearing certain fashion trends, etc. I’m not a huge fan of tattoos, I can handle 1 or 2 but I** wouldn’t **dismiss a potential mate because of it, especially if its not in a noticeable area. A tattoo doesn’t change their personality. As for regrets? Oh yes, people have them. You either love the tattoo for life, or regret it for life. :doh2:
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Well…just have to chime in. I have a couple tattoos in non-visible places that I got during healing from past abuse…they are very personally spiritual to me and mean a LOT about my relationship with Jesus, and they did change my personality for a number of reasons, first of all being that I was taking ownership of my body and not feeling like it still belonged to an abuser. So… 🙂 people sometimes have good reasons for getting them as you said. I do agree with everyone here who said tons of visible tattoos are a totally different matter.
 
When I was single I was looking mostly for a pious person, but I found out that doesn’t necessarily make that person a good or loving person. I think you guys should check out this link that I got from Debora123’s signature elizabethfoss.com/reallea…l-world-1.html . It really explains well what you should be looking for in a spouse.
 
JoArtist said:
When I was single I was looking mostly for a pious person, but I found out that doesn’t necessarily make that person a good or loving person. I think you guys should check out this link that I got from Debora123’s signature elizabethfoss.com/reallea…l-world-1.html . It really explains well what you should be looking for in a spouse.
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Well I don’t think y’all gonna find a man on here who disagrees with that. That article reminds me of how my Jewish friend told me that it is very praiseworthy in the eyes of God for a devout Jewish man to marry a prostitute if she began to repent and follow God, because that man is helping her lead a righteous life. Kinda puts a cool radical perspective to “Don’t look to Mrs. Beaver” for the typical wife.
 
these attract me: honesty, generosity, maturity, good scent, happy disposition, good body.

Turn offs: bad mouthing others (particularly their parents), insensitivity to others’ pains, selfishness,
 
Well, there’s been a bit of talking about being fair and I’d like to point out that while giving someone a chance to show more of himself is one thing, it would probably not be a great idea to go further on the competition/fairness/prize road. People need compatibility, not just a win or a fair win.
 
chevalier said:
Well, there’s been a bit of talking about being fair and I’d like to point out that while giving someone a chance to show more of himself is one thing, it would probably not be a great idea to go further on the competition/fairness/prize road. People need compatibility, not just a win or a fair win.
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Yes this is true, you can’t give everyone a chance just to be nice if you seriously do not see them as a potential mate for you/they already are not compatible with your ‘non-negotiables’.
What am I doing here anyway, I am not single. 😃 But I do like to talk about topics like this. Very interesting to hear what other Catholics look for.
 
1inICXC said:
I haven’t been single since I was 20, but there were three things that would attract me to a guy:
  1. Looks ( tall, dark and handsome)
  2. Charm/ confidence - if he lacked somewhat in the first department he could compensate with this
  3. Intelligence - if he had 100% of 1&2 but lacked 3 he was written-off, immediately.
Now, what would make me stay is TONS of add-ons to 1,2&3.
Being a practicing Catholic would naturally follow from #3, or, would with time and some persuasion.

Aside from every virtue, I was also looking for humor, athleticism and older by at least 2 years.

I wish I still had my list but either way, one thing I know I didn’t include but wish I had: Godly upbringing and parents…
I won’t deny it, I’m picky.
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Oops, I forgot to add: European. I wasn’t keen on marrying my own nationality necessarily but knew I was looking for southern European or Latin American.
 
Qualities I look for in a man:
  1. Practicing Catholic
  2. Average height or taller (I’m short, but I’m terrified of having a short son!)
  3. Attractive (Not a male model or anything just someone who dresses nicely, well-groomed, straight teeth, clear face … things like that).
  4. Intelligent (I would strongly prefer someone with at least a Bachelor’s degree).
  5. Good communication skills
  6. Fun to be around
  7. Good with finances
  8. A man not afraid to be “the man” in the relationship, but will respect my opinions (Someone who I can trust will take care of me and our future family, someone who makes me feel safe, etc).
  9. Treats everyone kindly and with respect
  10. Respects and gets along well with my family
 
runwaymodel said:
Yes this is true, you can’t give everyone a chance just to be nice if you seriously do not see them as a potential mate for you/they already are not compatible with your ‘non-negotiables’.
What am I doing here anyway, I am not single. 😃 But I do like to talk about topics like this. Very interesting to hear what other Catholics look for.
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It does look a bit like the “fair chance” is something supposed to knock down a couple of the non-negotiables just so that this or that group of people can have a fair chance… but this is not sport. It’s like the highschool peer pressure like it’s not nice to refuse a date to a boy from an ethnic minority, even if he’s obnoxious. Sigh.
 
Chev when we say be fair, we of course mean in moderation. We mean if you find someone attractive, don’t blow them off cause of one puny thing…chances are you might not find someone who 100% perfectly fits into your little box of the perfect husband

I’m not saying ladies have to date this guy to be faaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiirrr

http://www.geek.com/gearlog/images/tron-guy-remake.jpg

Ladies…you do not have to date this guy 👍
 
I forgot one, and a bit ONE:
  • HUMBLE!!!
I hate prideful people, and especially dating prideful girls. Being humble is the absolute root to being a good and understanding person. I need a lady that is willing to humble herself to others.
 
Rutabaga said:
  1. Average height or taller (I’m short, but I’m terrified of having a short son!)
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Haha! I have this exact fear, myself! I’m 5 feet and the only short member of my family. I’ve witnessed men my height or a little taller get so much flack, while it seems I’m allowed to date a guy even as tall as 6ft- seems unfair. I wouldn’t wish it on my kid!

But who knows, perhaps he’ll be a future World leader like someone suggested! 😃 Or perhaps God will send me a 6ft tall guy and my Sons may be lucky enough to take my “tall” genes that skipped me and combine with my husband’s and be as tall as the men in my family ;).
 
joshvanrad said:
I forgot one, and a bit ONE:
  • HUMBLE!!!
I hate prideful people, and especially dating prideful girls. Being humble is the absolute root to being a good and understanding person. I need a lady that is willing to humble herself to others.
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Elaborate, please. I’ve been accused on these forums of having an off-putting attitude in debates. I’ve often wondered if it’s because of Pride 😊. People mean different things when they say “Proud” or “Humble”. In the context you describe, could you give some examples? You could help a girl! 🙂
 
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