Struggling

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gr8full

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Hello all,
I am not sure this is the best place to post, but you’ve been so helpful and encouraging about my RCIA attendance I thought I’d post here.
Although my husband is supportive of my attending RCIA, and even has no issue with my attendance of Mass, I am feeling awkward about it all.
It may sound like a no brainer to some of you who’ve been Catholic your whole life, or at least your entire adult life, but it’s a struggle for me to let go of my current church. They are wonderful people who truly love God and love the community. They reach out and they encourage and exhort the membership to walk a close walk with Christ, to be conformed to Him, to put off sin and live a life that honors Him. I’ve definately heard the pastor say things that aren’t in agreement with the Catholic church, but he never slams the Church or insinuates that Catholics aren’t “real” Christians, as I have heard some people say pastors say.
I think if my husband or children were joining me in Mass I would have no issue. I feel somewhat seperated from my family now and it’s hard because we’ve always been so close.
I am so new to RCIA I don’t even have a sponsor yet, so I feel like there is no one I can talk to about this.
Thanks for your prayers.
 
Dear Struggling,

Perhaps you might visualize that you are walking into your present church arm in arm with Jesus and Mary. This sounds like a wonderful Christian community where you can be with your family and Jesus is a special and familial way. Why not bring their Mother with you. They might not realize the “fullness of Truth” of our Catholic Church but they already have Jesus. You are with God when you are there. Focus on the things that ARE true in this community where you can worship with your family. Watch EWTN’s The Journey Home if you get a chance. You sound like you are missing the presence of the Eucharist in this community. Pray that your family sees the love you have for Jesus and you may eventually lead them into the fullness of faith. Enjoy the journey. And just know that some of us “cradle Catholics” who have our family at mass still realize that we do not have thie same belief in the Church. Some go out of duty but not necessarily out of love and knowledge of Truth in Jesus Christ. You may be ahead of the game here if your family already loves Jesus!!! Love in Christ.
 
gr8full said:
It may sound like a no brainer to some of you who’ve been Catholic your whole life, or at least your entire adult life, but it’s a struggle for me to let go of my current church. They are wonderful people who truly love God and love the community.
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Thanks for your prayers.
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Gr8full,

I understand.
I left my evangelical community AND my Christian home schooling community of friends who I had been close to for 20 years. My Catholic conversion cost me a very full life and many close friends from my former church.

Being Catholic, to them, is tantamount to losing my salvation. They haven’t approached me about it, I wish they would. But I know how they feel, because I was just like them. I didn’t understand.

I’m a very loyal friend. I’ve learned that about myself in the four years I’ve been Catholic. As an evangelical home school mom, when I’d get together with my friends, we talked about home school philosophy, and Bible study, raising Christian kids or having a Christian marriage. Now that I’m Catholic, “religion” is an off-limits topic for them. I could do it, but they can’t.
I understand my conversion. They don’t.

I haven’t been able to re establish what I lost, in terms of close friends. I just haven’t. That is the cost of being Catholic.
Sometimes I get lonely and I think, what if I went to protestant worship service today? Would I be able to reconnect with old friends? And I realize that if they saw me in the building, they would think, that I have come back to my senses. Just by attending, I would be speaking a lie by my presence. So I quickly come to my senses, and realize that I couldn’t go back. I just can’t. I’m Catholic today, and I will always be Catholic.

I do connect with many Catholics now throughout the world through the internet. I attend Catholic conferences in many states and meet new friends that way. I attend retreats and sometimes Rosary groups. Those are good avenues for meeting new people who are serious about their faith.

Please pick up some books like the Surprised by Truth series by Patrick Madrid.amazon.com/Surprised-Truth-Converts-Biblical-Historical/dp/0964261081/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1226854641&sr=8-2
It is a compilation of several Catholic converts, and tells their stories that are not unlike yours, many of them had to leave beloved friends and churches behind, but the glory set before them was too good to look back.

Catholic Mystique is another good book, testimonies of women converts. amazon.com/Catholic-Mystique-Fourteen-Fulfillment-Church/dp/1931709912/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1226854724&sr=1-1

Reading these conversion stories from other Christians have given me much comfort, especially when my conversion was new, knowing that I wasn’t alone in my feelings of being alone.

May the Lord bless you and keep you and send you a perfect RCIA Sponsor.
 
I am also walking the path of conversion alone. My husband has no interest in joining the Catholic Church, though he does not object to my attendance at Mass or at RCIA.

I still don’t know anyone at Mass, so I find a seat near the Tabernacle and sit with Jesus 🙂 😃

Do PM me if you’d like to chat with someone in a similar situation, okay? 🙂

*Stella
 
Thanks so much for your encouragement. I will look into the Catholic Mystic, I’ve read some of the other book suggested, but it was a long while back.
Graceandglory, it seems like you and I have very similar situations(or should I say had). Although my kids are in school now, one a senior in a private (protestant) school, the other in public high school I still have some of the same friends from before. I am not in touch like I was before with them due to my situation now, work, a move, etc. But now I wonder what it will be like, just how long will the awkward silence be there when I announce what I’m doing. I can already see the shock on their faces and the saddness in thinking I’ve lost my mind and that I must be going through a mid life crisis of some sorts.
It’s good to know there are people here who understand what I’m going through.
I appreciate any further advice and please keep in touch!👍
 
gr8full said:
But now I wonder what it will be like, just how long will the awkward silence be there when I announce what I’m doing. I can already see the shock on their faces and the saddness in thinking I’ve lost my mind and that I must be going through a mid life crisis of some sorts.

It’s good to know there are people here who understand what I’m going through.
I appreciate any further advice and please keep in touch!👍
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My best friend found out at my Dad’s Funeral Mass. She didn’t quite know what to say about it, and there has been a deafening silence between us for two years now.

Of my handful of best friends, two are former Catholics who are now faithful bible believing protestant Christians. They are okay with me. The two friends who were born fundamentalists and are still fundamentalists, are the ones who don’t know what to do.

You can PM me anytime.

God bless you on your journey.
 
Those who are persecuted in the name of Christ are blessed. I understand your predicament since I work with many Southern Baptist. The Baptist have the same fundamental beliefs and we get along well but I also I have heard comments as to “I now how you Catholics are” etc. What do they mean by that? I just take it as a compliment. My persecution reaffirms my faith. Nothing in this world matters as much as your relationship with God. We have to take the losses with the gains. I will pray for your “old” friends and of course you. Just be a good Catholic witness as you never know what will change their Spirit. Maybe God is working His ways through you. By the Grace of God all things are good even if it may not seem so. God bless you my friend.
 
I really feel your pain. None of my family or friends were Catholic when I converted. There is likely someone in RCIA that you could meet for Mass to be your “pew partner”. It really helps.

You might also read (if you haven’t) “When Only One Converts” and also another by one whose spouse wasn’t Catholic at the time of his conversion, “Rome, Sweet Home”. I would especially recommend the latter since Scott Hahn, the author, used to be a Presbyterian pastor and so deals very plainly (and without his usual scholarly style) with things that many protestants have a bit of trouble understanding. Also, every other chapter is written by his wife, Kimberly - the daughter of a Presbyterian minister along with being the wife of one, and she elucidates from a **feminine **perspective his conversion (and her feelings during that) and then her own conversion.
 
gr8full, you have been called by the Holy Spirit, not only to have a fuller relationship with Christ, but to take Him to others. You have been selected, and blessed you are, for you have been found worthy. You need not give up old friends, unless they give you up.

The Catholic Church does not have the “friendly” reputation that many other churches have. However, it has Christ in the Flesh! It has more Sacraments, more devotions, more types of prayer.You can attend mass in virtually every nation on earth and feel at home.

It also has adoration (“Holy hour”), where you spend time in the presence of Christ Himself. No other Church has anything close. Once ther bread has been consecrated, it becomes the Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity of our Lord! I cannot recommend adoration highly enough to you. Many conversions have been brought about merely by sitting in Christ’s presence.

I am called to prayer before Christ in the Blessed Sacrament, and I have seen and experienced minor miracles before Him. It is an hour that is priceless. Sit and ask Him to speak to your heart about calling you. You will have your answer, and you will be at peace.
 
Your message is so full of hope, and yet a little heartbreaking… why don’t you have a sponsor? that can make a big difference in how you begin to connnect with your new Christian community, as we all are part of the Body of Christ, your former church community that you feel very connected with and your new church community. Try to look for ways to remain involved with your former church – Our St. Vincent de Paul store is “manned” by folks of many different Christian communities. If there are activities that benefit others and you can be involved with, you are doing Jesus’ work. You do not have to be cut off from these people, who sound like very people very devoted to Jesus. Who knows, maybe after you make this current transition, you will help to merge groups from both churches in efforts to reach out to those who need help!

This is coming from what some folks call a “cradle Catholic”. But I had to move from the parish where I belonged from my own baptism thru the baptisms of my two children, it was really a tough transition to a new community where I knew no one, and even though I was still in the same faith…“One Church”…I was having trouble feeling like I belonged. The woman who ran the CCD program was so great at welcoming me, after I introduced myself to her, that might be a resource for you even though you do not have children in their program. I think the CCD director is usually outgoing and so welcoming and supportive of both children and adults. (They usually know most of the people in the parish, as well) I really hope and pray that you find someone in your parish to help you feel more connected. Look for people who are involved in church activities and organizations. They may not approach you, but these folks are involved for a reason, and would be so supportive of you. Don’t be afraid to ask.
As you go to church yourself, perhaps you should view this as “you” time with Jesus. I do not know the ages of your children but I had 2 children close in age. When they became young adults and for the first time did not go to Thanksgiving mass with me, I found a new experience…I was able to be totally focused on the Mass, and private prayer and meditation. I felt so full of peace, and strengthened to face the week. I love to go to Mass with my family, but have been trying to get there once a week around my work schedule by myself, it is a different experience. Let yourself feel this, and come home to your family more ready to deal with all that a family brings…with the inner strength that Jesus gives us!
Talk to your priest as well!
Do not be disheartened.
 
gr8full said:
Hello all,
.
Although my husband is supportive of my attending RCIA, and even has no issue with my attendance of Mass, I am feeling awkward about it all.
It may sound like a no brainer to some of you who’ve been Catholic your whole life, or at least your entire adult life, but it’s a struggle for me to let go of my current church. They are wonderful people who truly love God and love the community. s.
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I think part of your discomfort comes from the fact that your current church is so different from the Catholic one… and also because society in general has funny ideas about Catholicism… (we worship Mary, we think the pope can’t sin, etc etc…).

All change is uncomfortable… When i came back to the Cahtolic Church years ago, i was extremely uncomfortable… at Masss. I looked around and saw nothing but “respectable” people who had not done the things i had done… I felt like running out of there… I felt that they were too holy for me. Now i have learned that the holiness i felt was NOT coming from the people but from the Blessed Sacrament (the Real Presence of Christ)… I didn’t know that at the time, even though i was raised Catholic (but not catechized worth a sorry &^%$)… 😦 Anyway… have you prayed a rosary (or two…) for the fact that your family isn’t following you into the Church? People don’t listen to preaching much (sometimes… esp family) but the rosary is powerful… I have seen people i pray for come to the Church…

God bless…
 
gr8full said:
Hello all,
I am not sure this is the best place to post, but you’ve been so helpful and encouraging about my RCIA attendance I thought I’d post here.
Although my husband is supportive of my attending RCIA, and even has no issue with my attendance of Mass, I am feeling awkward about it all.
It may sound like a no brainer to some of you who’ve been Catholic your whole life, or at least your entire adult life, but it’s a struggle for me to let go of my current church. They are wonderful people who truly love God and love the community. They reach out and they encourage and exhort the membership to walk a close walk with Christ, to be conformed to Him, to put off sin and live a life that honors Him. I’ve definately heard the pastor say things that aren’t in agreement with the Catholic church, but he never slams the Church or insinuates that Catholics aren’t “real” Christians, as I have heard some people say pastors say.
I think if my husband or children were joining me in Mass I would have no issue. I feel somewhat seperated from my family now and it’s hard because we’ve always been so close.
I am so new to RCIA I don’t even have a sponsor yet, so I feel like there is no one I can talk to about this.
Thanks for your prayers.
Click to expand...
I was in your same boat when I decided to come home. My husband is not Catholic, my father is a Methodist minister, and I didn’t even know anyone that was Catholic. I didn’t have a sponsor either so I know what that’s like. But I just kept telling myself, God has called me here and He’ll make it all ok. And he did. I would never consider myself anything else except Catholic now. My husband does come to Mass occasionally, but he’s still not Catholic. So many times I go to Mass alone, but it finally didn’t bother me. I was blessed with a wonderful sponsor about 2 months into RCIA and we are still very close. I still attend Mass by myself a lot but I’m there to be with God, not anyone else. Yes it would be nice for DH to become Catholic but I’m not pushing him. That’s his decision. I do understand your struggle and I will most definitely pray for you. Please, if there is anything I can do, or if you want to talk, let me know! You’re in my prayers!
 
AngelRose81 said:
I was in your same boat when I decided to come home. My husband is not Catholic, my father is a Methodist minister, and I didn’t even know anyone that was Catholic. !
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so what caused your interest in Catholicism? Did a Catholic teach you about the faith?? What religion did you know/practice before?
 
Well, I feel I must update everyone.
I have a wonderful sponsor now. It has been so great having someone to talk to and ask questions of.

Now, to answer what brought me to the church:
I think that the only answer is the Holy Spirit.
I have no other logical answer or any other answer for that matter.
I met a while back who is Catholic. I asked her some quesitons about the church and that was pretty much it for about three years. Then when my husband was in Iraq I guess you could say I was looking for things to keep me busy. She recommended I read a book, Surprised By The Truth. I read it and that just intrigued me.
Well for several months I read a lot of books and then my husband came home. He is very much a Protestant, we are both committed Christians who love our Lord Jesus. I was raised Southern Baptist. We are in a Southern Baptist church now. I am It just wasn’t the right time for me to move forward.
Well, a couple of months ago I started feeling nearly the overwhelming need to start attending RCIA. My husband is still supportive. It’s been a challenge, but I’m ok with that. I still attend church with my husband, and children and go to Mass and meet my sponsor there.
I have found so many here on CA forums that are supportive and encouraging. It’s been a great experience.
Thanks for asking!
 
gr8full said:
Hello all,
I am not sure this is the best place to post, but you’ve been so helpful and encouraging about my RCIA attendance I thought I’d post here.
Although my husband is supportive of my attending RCIA, and even has no issue with my attendance of Mass, I am feeling awkward about it all.
It may sound like a no brainer to some of you who’ve been Catholic your whole life, or at least your entire adult life, but it’s a struggle for me to let go of my current church. They are wonderful people who truly love God and love the community. They reach out and they encourage and exhort the membership to walk a close walk with Christ, to be conformed to Him, to put off sin and live a life that honors Him. I’ve definately heard the pastor say things that aren’t in agreement with the Catholic church, but he never slams the Church or insinuates that Catholics aren’t “real” Christians, as I have heard some people say pastors say.
I think if my husband or children were joining me in Mass I would have no issue. I feel somewhat seperated from my family now and it’s hard because we’ve always been so close.
I am so new to RCIA I don’t even have a sponsor yet, so I feel like there is no one I can talk to about this.
Thanks for your prayers.
Click to expand...
Maybe you shouldn’t convert. Truthfully, I think you shouldn’t.
 
gr8full said:
Well, I feel I must update everyone.
I have a wonderful sponsor now. It has been so great having someone to talk to and ask questions of.

Now, to answer what brought me to the church:
I think that the only answer is the Holy Spirit.
I have no other logical answer or any other answer for that matter.
I met a while back who is Catholic. I asked her some quesitons about the church and that was pretty much it for about three years. Then when my husband was in Iraq I guess you could say I was looking for things to keep me busy. She recommended I read a book, Surprised By The Truth. I read it and that just intrigued me.
Well for several months I read a lot of books and then my husband came home. He is very much a Protestant, we are both committed Christians who love our Lord Jesus. I was raised Southern Baptist. We are in a Southern Baptist church now. I am It just wasn’t the right time for me to move forward.
Well, a couple of months ago I started feeling nearly the overwhelming need to start attending RCIA. My husband is still supportive. It’s been a challenge, but I’m ok with that. I still attend church with my husband, and children and go to Mass and meet my sponsor there.
I have found so many here on CA forums that are supportive and encouraging. It’s been a great experience.
Thanks for asking!
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Praise God for his love and faithfulness! Know that I married my Catholic wife and went from zero religion to Catholic in less than seven years. The point is not that your are leaving anything, or losing anything, but that you are gaining. You are moving to a greater good and calling those you love along. This is exactly how the Holy Spirit works.

Have you visited:

www.catholicscomehome.org/

This is a wonderful site that has a section just for you. It will answer many of your questions, provide guidance and reassure you that the Holy Spirit is indeed, calling you. God bless you on your journey.
 
Angel,
Do you still attend the Methodist church with your husband? I was wondering how that works for others.

KingAlfred,
Why would you say that I shouldn’t convert? Is it because I still have questions I’m seeking answers to or because you don’t think anyone should convert?

And Po, thank you for the link to the website. I will check it out for sure.
 
KingAlfred said:
Maybe you shouldn’t convert. Truthfully, I think you shouldn’t.
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i totally don’t get this response… :eek: :confused:

Everyone should convert… If everyone knew about Catholicism… everyone (of good will) WOULD convert…

but God wants ALL in His Church…

:confused:
 
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