Sunday Best? Church Leaders Blush at "Casual Catholic" Dress

[catharina]

I was trying to be kind.

I know!

 

[rlg94086]

This has nothing to do with the devotion or faith of those who dress down for Mass. It has simply to do with what is appropriate attire for Mass–nothing more needs to be assumed with this discussion.

The litmus test is simple (imo): What would people wear if they were invited to dinner with the Pope?

If a person would wear a dress or suit to have dinner with the Pope, but they think it is fine to wear jean shorts and a t-shirt to Mass, then perhaps that person’s priorities are bit off (just a thought).

Exactly.

Have you noticed that people dress up for a funeral Mass, wedding or Baptism? Dress like that.

 

[Tantum_ergo]

Right.
Notice that nobody is saying “dress in tiara and pearls for weekday Mass.”

If your normal work attire is jeans and a flannel shirt, and you attend weekday Mass in the same right after (or before) work, no problem.

But if you have a pair of slacks (if male) or a skirt and blouse (if female) that hang in the closet for when you go out for your anniversary, or get asked to a dinner or wedding reception, why not wear them for Mass on Sunday, provided you aren’t working Sunday (hey, cows need to be milked every day of the week, and hospital personnel need to work weekends too so coming in scrubs when you’ve just pulled an 18 hour shift is fine too!)?

And if you normally wear slacks and a long-sleeved oxford shirt to work, why not wear the same for an hour at Sunday Mass, instead of choosing MASS to wear the sweat pants and sports jersey?

Priorities and common sense. Where have they gone?

Nobody is asking the person who normally wears jeans 24/7 to scrap the jeans for Mass. . .UNLESS that very same person has an outfit (non jeans) that he or she would wear for an ‘event’ like going out to dinner or receiving an award. Because if the person has a ‘less casual’ outfit available, then that person is acknowledging that there are times and places where jeans are not ‘enough’. And Mass should be one of those times and places.

Jeans are modest and can be appropriate for the person who has jeans alone, who is working. . .even for a person who might normally wear a dressier outfit but it is 20 below zero that day, the ‘good pants’ accidentally got ripped when she was putting them on that morning and there is simply no TIME to fix them! So even if a person has a dressier outfit, there can be unexpected events (the baby threw up, somebody slipped and fell in the mud on the way to the car, you name it) where the jeans do become the only, and appropriate, things to wear.

Really, it is only the person who dresses more casually for the Mass than he or she does for work. . .who wears ripped, filthy, immodest clothing to Mass when he or she has clean, untorn, modest clothing in the closet available to wear instead, who we are calling on to consider that the particular point of view in dressing as though the Mass were LESS important in their life than their work or leisure activities MIGHT be (and IMO is) a misunderstanding on their part which they should rectify.

The average person who dresses in modest casual clothing -slacks not suit or skirt, but does so for all activities --while it might be nice if they at some point did consider that a dressier Sunday attire would be way to show respect and love to God–is NOT sinning or wrong in wearing modest casual clothing for all their activities and we aren’t harranging them or saying they are wrong or lazy for the clothing choice. While a dressier option might be a better choice if they were able to afford it, the modest casual clothing is still a GOOD choice.

You see it isn’t a question of ‘casual modest’ being BAD and dressier ‘good’.

It’s a question of casual or even ‘expensive’ but ripped, filthy, vulgar or immodest clothing being bad. Casual modest (including jeans) worn 24/7 is GOOD. Dressier (if affordable) worn for special occasions, and by dressy I mean a modest price suit, dress or skirt, not something worn for the prom) would be BETTER/BEST for Mass, but only for those who can afford it.

See the difference? Nobody is calling modest casual clothing like jeans ‘bad’ for Mass; modest is GOOD but there can be (if affordable) something which is better. . . A comparison of two good things; one might be better but the other is still good.

 

[irishpatrick]

Exactly.

Have you noticed that people dress up for a funeral Mass, wedding or Baptism? Dress like that.

Yes, good point. Or, at least a higher level of dress.

 

[Annabelle_Marie]

Giving your best in every way means exactly that. Of course, Jesus reads our hearts and can see if we love him, yet how we choose to dress is a statement. It is also a point of witness to those around us to make every attempt to dress well when we go to Mass. Like it or not, perception is reality for many people, and when some people see lesser clothes being worn to Mass, then they will get the idea that Mass is nothing special (this especially applies to children). It is also clear that when a young person sees we will wear nice clothes to work, but we wear shorts and t-shirt to Mass, then we are showing them we think Mass is less important than Mass.

Jesus does not need us to dress well–we need to do that for the sake of our own souls, and we need to do that for those around us. Personal discipline, even in what we wear, is a very holy thing and it helps us remain steadfast in the Lord.

(btw, this is really not about you personally, it is about what people should do in general)

I don’t live in the Vatican, but I sure don’t get the sense there are a lot of people working there who wear shorts and t-shirts each day while being around or with the Pope.

It is obvious that “if” all a given person has is shorts and a t-shirt, then they are giving their best even though outwardly it looks like less.

It also strikes me that, as Catholics, we should be praying for the conversion of our fallen away brothers and sisters in Protestant faiths. It seems that one of the most amazing gifts the Lord gives is His Real Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity, in the form of the Eucharistic species. However, if I were a Protestant walking into most Catholic Churches, I would be utterly unconvinced that the people there think they are receiving anything special at all. We are called to make the faith attractive to those around us, so that they feel compelled to enter the Church. We should look, act and live, in a way that sets us apart from the world. It should be obvious to those around us–not for showman’s type sake, but for the sake of truly being “set apart.”

I wear the same thing to Mass that I wear to work:shrug: It’s just not as fancy as what other people wear. I think it also depends on location. Wearing a suit/tie in our parish would be distracting because nobody else wears them. To do so would be calling undue attention to yourself.

Some people say…“wear what you wear to funerals, baptisms, and weddings”. To me…those are special events and I don’t have those special clothes to pull out everyday to Mass. I will wear or try to dress up extra nice for Easter/Christmas and the like to Mass. I don’t know about the others because I haven’t attended to many of those.

You might not be utterly convinced as a Protestant…but I spent 20 years as a Protestant…and came back to Catholism in large part due to the reverence around communion. And it had NOTHING to do with clothing. You can be truly set apart…just in your attitude and contenance. Just saying.

 

[Annabelle_Marie]

Right.
Notice that nobody is saying “dress in tiara and pearls for weekday Mass.”

If your normal work attire is jeans and a flannel shirt, and you attend weekday Mass in the same right after (or before) work, no problem.

But if you have a pair of slacks (if male) or a skirt and blouse (if female) that hang in the closet for when you go out for your anniversary, or get asked to a dinner or wedding reception, why not wear them for Mass on Sunday, provided you aren’t working Sunday (hey, cows need to be milked every day of the week, and hospital personnel need to work weekends too so coming in scrubs when you’ve just pulled an 18 hour shift is fine too!)?

And if you normally wear slacks and a long-sleeved oxford shirt to work, why not wear the same for an hour at Sunday Mass, instead of choosing MASS to wear the sweat pants and sports jersey?

Priorities and common sense. Where have they gone?

Nobody is asking the person who normally wears jeans 24/7 to scrap the jeans for Mass. . .UNLESS that very same person has an outfit (non jeans) that he or she would wear for an ‘event’ like going out to dinner or receiving an award. Because if the person has a ‘less casual’ outfit available, then that person is acknowledging that there are times and places where jeans are not ‘enough’. And Mass should be one of those times and places.

Jeans are modest and can be appropriate for the person who has jeans alone, who is working. . .even for a person who might normally wear a dressier outfit but it is 20 below zero that day, the ‘good pants’ accidentally got ripped when she was putting them on that morning and there is simply no TIME to fix them! So even if a person has a dressier outfit, there can be unexpected events (the baby threw up, somebody slipped and fell in the mud on the way to the car, you name it) where the jeans do become the only, and appropriate, things to wear.

Really, it is only the person who dresses more casually for the Mass than he or she does for work. . .who wears ripped, filthy, immodest clothing to Mass when he or she has clean, untorn, modest clothing in the closet available to wear instead, who we are calling on to consider that the particular point of view in dressing as though the Mass were LESS important in their life than their work or leisure activities MIGHT be (and IMO is) a misunderstanding on their part which they should rectify.

The average person who dresses in modest casual clothing -slacks not suit or skirt, but does so for all activities --while it might be nice if they at some point did consider that a dressier Sunday attire would be way to show respect and love to God–is NOT sinning or wrong in wearing modest casual clothing for all their activities and we aren’t harranging them or saying they are wrong or lazy for the clothing choice. While a dressier option might be a better choice if they were able to afford it, the modest casual clothing is still a GOOD choice.

You see it isn’t a question of ‘casual modest’ being BAD and dressier ‘good’.

It’s a question of casual or even ‘expensive’ but ripped, filthy, vulgar or immodest clothing being bad. Casual modest (including jeans) worn 24/7 is GOOD. Dressier (if affordable) worn for special occasions, and by dressy I mean a modest price suit, dress or skirt, not something worn for the prom) would be BETTER/BEST for Mass, but only for those who can afford it.

See the difference? Nobody is calling modest casual clothing like jeans ‘bad’ for Mass; modest is GOOD but there can be (if affordable) something which is better. . . A comparison of two good things; one might be better but the other is still good.

I like this…but you should realize that there are some that are asking for more. For example, early on a college student here got taken to task for attending daily Mass in what he was wearing and not bring a duffle bag with a change of clothes. I think that is where some consternation is coming from.

 

[CMatt25]

Wearing a suit/tie in our parish would be distracting because nobody else wears them. To do so would be calling undue attention to yourself.

Some people say…“wear what you wear to funerals, baptisms, and weddings”. To me…those are special events and I don’t have those special clothes to pull out everyday to Mass. I will wear or try to dress up extra nice for Easter/Christmas and the like to Mass. I don’t know about the others because I haven’t attended to many of those.

You might not be utterly convinced as a Protestant…but I spent 20 years as a Protestant…and came back to Catholism in large part due to the reverence around communion. And it had NOTHING to do with clothing. You can be truly set apart…just in your attitude and contenance. Just saying.

Annabelle Marie, I take it your priest or local church leaders weren’t quoted in the OP link?

 

[CMatt25]

This has nothing to do with the devotion or faith of those who dress down for Mass. It has simply to do with what is appropriate attire for Mass–nothing more needs to be assumed with this discussion.

The litmus test is simple (imo): What would people wear if they were invited to dinner with the Pope?

If a person would wear a dress or suit to have dinner with the Pope, but they think it is fine to wear jean shorts and a t-shirt to Mass, then perhaps that person’s priorities are bit off (just a thought).

And that’s absolutely fine if that is your litmus test for you. But emphasis on IMO in your statement. And emphasis on “perhaps” in your last sentence. Since you don’t know I wouldn’t spend too much time dwelling on it. Just a thought so as to be sure to keep your priorities straight too.

 

[ChiRho]

Some people say…“wear what you wear to funerals, baptisms, and weddings”. ** To me…those are special events** and I don’t have those special clothes to pull out everyday to Mass. I will wear or try to dress up extra nice for Easter/Christmas and the like to Mass. I don’t know about the others because I haven’t attended to many of those.
.

The essential point of many here is: why shouldn’t Mass be considered a special event worthy of nice dress as well?

Do you really not have a two or three nice dresses, or a pair of dress pants and a shirt? People might not want to wear these clothes, and that’s a separate issue, but I find the lack of access argument a hard one to buy. Everyone has a few nice clothes, and they’re not expensive at all. Thrift stores are in vogue now and someone can dress very well for cheap

 

[CMatt25]

The essential point of many here is: why shouldn’t Mass be considered a special event worthy of nice dress as well?

Do you really not have a two or three nice dresses, or a pair of dress pants and a shirt? People might not want to wear these clothes, and that’s a separate issue, but I find the lack of access argument a hard one to buy. Everyone has a few nice clothes, and they’re not expensive at all. Thrift stores are in vogue now and someone can dress very well for cheap

Not certain what you mean by thrift store. But if you mean like a Goodwill store, in vogue or not, one of my priorities is to tend to leave the thrift stores for those even less fortunate than me. Of course I strive to and have a tendency to prioritize for instance the poor, the sick without adequate health care coverage, the homeless, the hungry, the naked, world peace, far over what others are wearing to church.

 

[ChiRho]

In vogue or not, one of my priorities is to tend to leave the thrift stores for those even less fortunate than me. Of course I strive to and have a tendency to prioritize for instance the poor, the sick without adequate health care coverage, the homeless, the hungry, the naked, world peace, far over what others are wearing to church.

Looks like you are better than everyone else yet again, CMatt. I mentioned thrift stores for anyone who wasn’t able to afford nice but expensive clothes, obviously.

 

[irishpatrick]

I wear the same thing to Mass that I wear to work:shrug: It’s just not as fancy as what other people wear. I think it also depends on location. Wearing a suit/tie in our parish would be distracting because nobody else wears them. To do so would be calling undue attention to yourself.

Some people say…“wear what you wear to funerals, baptisms, and weddings”. To me…those are special events and I don’t have those special clothes to pull out everyday to Mass. I will wear or try to dress up extra nice for Easter/Christmas and the like to Mass. I don’t know about the others because I haven’t attended to many of those.

You might not be utterly convinced as a Protestant…but I spent 20 years as a Protestant…and came back to Catholism in large part due to the reverence around communion. And it had NOTHING to do with clothing. You can be truly set apart…just in your attitude and contenance. Just saying.

Mass is one of the msot special events a person can attend. It does not get much bigger.

 

[irishpatrick]

And that’s absolutely fine if that is your litmus test for you. But emphasis on IMO in your statement. And emphasis on “perhaps” in your last sentence. Since you don’t know I wouldn’t spend too much time dwelling on it. Just a thought so as to be sure to keep your priorities straight too.

I will, and thank you.

However, as Christians, we are called to embolden each other and to correct when needed. While I cannot judge any one person, I certainly can look at the overall picture and make some accurate general conclusions–which I have done.

Mass is one of the most special events any person can ever attend in this life. If Mass is not worth an extra effort, than I am not sure what is. The very fact that so many Catholics do not see it that way is a very real problem. God comes to us in the Mass, His Real Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity. I just can’t think of anything (other than other Sacraments) that even comes close to that!

 

[Annabelle_Marie]

Mass is one of the msot special events a person can attend. It does not get much bigger.

I do not have money to dress for the most special event that I attend EVERYDAY! Why does that seem foreign to you. With cut backs at work and pay decreases with the price of everything going up…yes it does squeeze my budget.

People go on and on about thrift stores and such…I’ve never been able to find much on them…certainly not in bottoms nor do I have time to comb through them all the time. My spare time is taken up with work, Mass, adoration, scripture study, helping out for Ministry fairs, etc. Right now it’s planning with DH for coordination of Thanksgiving dinners for our parish where we feed over 1,600 meals to poor people.

Do you have a problem with that?

 

[irishpatrick]

Do you have a problem with that?

Nope, not at all. It is for you to know and decide. I never once directed this at any one person. My comments are general statements. If you are doing your best, well then you are doing your best.

 

[Elizabeth502]

If Mass is not worth an extra effort, than I am not sure what is. The very fact that so many Catholics do not see it that way is a very real problem. God comes to us in the Mass, His Real Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity. I just can’t think of anything (other than other Sacraments) that even comes close to that!

Amen, brother. Those of us who are officially unemployed and underemployed still manage to wear our bland “church uniform” whenever we attend Mass, no matter how frequent that attendance is. Even the “starving students” who attend weekday and weekend Masses with me put on their best attire on their limited budgets, which I really respect.

A lot of excuses continue here…

Thanks to ChiRo, irishpatrick, Rich O, Tigg, and catharina for keeping the faith, and keeping the message clear and simple. God Bless You.

 

[catharina]

Amen, brother. Those of us who are officially unemployed and underemployed still manage to wear our bland “church uniform” whenever we attend Mass, no matter how frequent that attendance is. Even the “starving students” who attend weekday and weekend Masses with me put on their best attire on their limited budgets, which I really respect.

A lot of excuses continue here…

Thanks to ChiRo, irishpatrick, Rich O, Tigg, and catharina for keeping the faith, and keeping the message clear and simple. God Bless You.

You’re welcome - and I’ll add that the “uniform” idea is excellent.

I do have some clothes that are for more formal outings - and that includes
attendance at Mass. Nothing fancy at all, but proper and modest. The idea
of “simple uniform dressing” is really good.

God bless you too, Elizabeth.

 

[Sarabande]

You’re welcome - and I’ll add that the “uniform” idea is excellent.

I do have some clothes that are for more formal outings - and that includes
attendance at Mass. Nothing fancy at all, but proper and modest. The idea
of “simple uniform dressing” is really good.

God bless you too, Elizabeth.

It’s funny… I’ve always called my church outfit and my wedding cantor outfit as my “uniform”. You only need between one to three outfits as I pointed out in my first post because, really, who has the money to purchase a ton of outfits? In fact, now that I’m pregnant again, I’ll be wearing my one wedding cantor dress, once I get too big to wear my normal clothes and then my one maternity skirt that I can mix with my maternity tops to wear for my Sunday mass cantor outfit.

 

[Annabelle_Marie]

Amen, brother. Those of us who are officially unemployed and underemployed still manage to wear our bland “church uniform” whenever we attend Mass, no matter how frequent that attendance is. Even the “starving students” who attend weekday and weekend Masses with me put on their best attire on their limited budgets, which I really respect.

A** lot of excuses continue here…**
Thanks to ChiRo, irishpatrick, Rich O, Tigg, and catharina for keeping the faith, and keeping the message clear and simple. God Bless You.

You know that is not very charitable and sounds awful judgmental from your statement. You stated before that you just want us to search our hearts and when we say we have done that then you say “a lot of excuses continue here”. So no I don’t think your message is clear and simple…

Oh…and are you saying that the rest of us do not have faith? I would surely hope not.

 

[Annabelle_Marie]

It’s funny… I’ve always called my church outfit and my wedding cantor outfit as my “uniform”. You only need between one to three outfits as I pointed out in my first post because, really, who has the money to purchase a ton of outfits? In fact, now that I’m pregnant again, I’ll be wearing my one wedding cantor dress, once I get too big to wear my normal clothes and then my one maternity skirt that I can mix with my maternity tops to wear for my Sunday mass cantor outfit.

Congrats on the pregnancy.

Do you go to Mass during your lunch hour? Someone who does then would have to wear one-three outfits all week… My “uniform” is what I wear to work mostly…I don’t dress down for Mass. But apparently that is not good enough for some people on this thread.

If they are really all that distracted by the sight of dockers then maybe they should be concentrating more on Mass