Tell an Outrageous Lie About the Previous Poster

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mVitus, the notorious hoarder, lost his vast collection of both teddy bears and newspapers in a huge fire in his apartment…“Beer cans…beer cans won’t burn!”, thought mVitus…he immediately started saving all his Old Mil Light cans…it didn’t take long for him to realize that crushed beer cans take up less space than intact beer cans, so he crushed them…and now, he’s finding uses for them…his dining room table is made of beer cans…his motorcycle has beer can fenders…and he’s working feverishly on a sports car made entirely of beer cans…
 
…turns out, there was some method to mVitus’s madness…he’s listed all his beer can creations on ebay, expecting to make a fortune…so far, no takers…
 
Boldlygo is personally in charge of making people’s toes itch. He finds it relaxing.
 
mVitus’s sports car isn’t all that sporty it can only go ten beer per mile.
 
For those of you who didn’t know, ‘TheLegend’ is an 8-foot tall, 450 lb sasquatch with superhuman strength…he recently joined a motorcycle ‘club’, and they had a weekend get-together at the ‘club’s’ hideout - er - cabin, located halfway up a mountain, on a little-traveled logging trail in the woods.
Needless to say, the beer flowed freely…late Friday night, the ‘club’ president decided that for his initiation, ‘TheLegend’ would receive a whole-body haircut…the gang - er - ‘club’ jumped him, and got the sheep shears out…big mistake…‘TheLegend’ decorated the walls with them, and tacked the president to the rafters with the sheep shears…he then drank all their beer [two pony kegs of his favorite, ‘Caribou Slobber’], picked up their Harleys, two at a time, threw them into a pile, and jumped up and down on them until they looked like something that mVitus would collect…then down the mountain in search of a real party…after all, the weekend was still young…
 
Though Boldlygo would never admit it, he enjoys the songs of Justin Bieber.
 
I do enjoy the songs of Justin Bieber, but only when mVitus sings them in his Tiny Tim falsetto…mVitus has been a Tiny Tim fan for many years, and when he has difficulty falling asleep, he sings ‘Tiptoe Through the Tulips’ until he nods off…[fortunately, he lives alone]…
 
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