The Death of 'Me-Church'

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I find that if you go regularly, wait in the narthex after Mass, then nod at people when they leave, you can eventually work up to a conversation. Or you could be braver than me and be ‘hail fellow well met’. We’re social creatures and people like to be acknowledged. And modern life, with all its stimuli, can be very lonely.

In my opinion, however, Catholics don’t really do fellowship the way I’ve heard Protestants do. And that might be a good thing. My mother used to disparage going to Mass just for the social aspect; meeting your neighbours and seeing who was there.

If the Mass is primarily a way of placating God by re-enacting the Sacrifice of His Son and begging Him for santicification, then the communal aspect should not be emphasised at its expense. Having a chummy time while He is suffering on the Cross doesn’t seem right.

In my opinion, get in a right relation with God and you will be in a right relation with your fellow man, regardless.
 
Layman said:
I find that if you go regularly, wait in the narthex after Mass, then nod at people when they leave, you can eventually work up to a conversation. Or you could be braver than me and be ‘hail fellow well met’. We’re social creatures and people like to be acknowledged. And modern life, with all its stimuli, can be very lonely.

In my opinion, however, Catholics don’t really do fellowship the way I’ve heard Protestants do. And that might be a good thing. My mother used to disparage going to Mass just for the social aspect; meeting your neighbours and seeing who was there.

If the Mass is primarily a way of placating God by re-enacting the Sacrifice of His Son and begging Him for santicification, then the communal aspect should not be emphasised at its expense. Having a chummy time while He is suffering on the Cross doesn’t seem right.

In my opinion, get in a right relation with God and you will be in a right relation with your fellow man, regardless.
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Being Catholic is more than just going to Mass. That’s the central component of our faith, but certainly not the only aspect. We are called to be part of a community of the faithful. If all someone does is go to Mass for an hour a week then they are missing out on a significant aspect of our Faith. Does wanting that sense of community constitute the “Me-Church?” I don’t think so.
 
yeah well seeing how so many people come to church dressed like slobs and so immodestly make you wanna say things like this. Especially when you see altar servers wearing shorts, flip flops and cracking gum going up to the altar. And parents are proud of this???

I do think it is a shame when I hear parents brag about how their boys NEVER have worn a suit and tie like wearing them is like wearing a straight jacket.
Mrs_Sally said:
Oh MY! That was rude! So there is nothing between wearing a suit and being a slob or immodest?

Many boys will have had no reason to wear a suit–slacks and a dress shirt are acceptable for any Mass. And probably any resturant for a boy. :rolleyes:

A woman can be perfectly modest and even well dressed without being “dressed to the nines” as she described. I’m sure there are plenty of women at the EF Mass you attend who are not wearing a dress suit, high heels, and stockings which is what I’m sure she was thinking of.

Ailina,
What you wear to work will probably be very appropriate for an EF Mass. And bring your sons in khakis and polos and they’ll be fine also! :hug3:
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Eric_Olsen said:
Your sons have never worn a suit? What a shame. Let me ask you this, would you dress like a slob at a high priced posh restaurant? And so what is the people in Christs time did not wear suits. Ever hear of dressing modestly?
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Hmmmm, I thought it was possible for men to dress up without wearing a suit and tie, as my brothers all do. None of them have white collar desk jobs, but work with their hands in the trades. They are not uneducated, but prefer that life.

A clean collared shirt and a neat pressed pair of pants are fine. What’s the obseesion with suits and ties? Why would my boys wear such things, when we never go to high end restaurants or out for anything requiring suit and tie? That isn’t an option in my single parent lifestyle. We rarely ever eat at ANY restaurant.

And what does wearing a suit and tie have to do with dressing modestly? If the occasion calls for it, I will wear a dress, not a suit and tie. Your post is very insulting.
 
Ailina said:
I have been to several different churches in my diocese, and kneeling is not required at all, especially the parishes where seating is so tight that there is NO room to kneel. It depends on the parish. Perhaps these women come from such a parish, and didn’t know the protocol of the TLM, especially if they have never gone to one before.
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I’ve been to various Eastern Rite Catholic Churches, the customs and liturgies far different from what I am used to at the Latin Mass. I usually try and follow the missal that is usually either passed out or in the pew. I also watch those around me to know when to stand, sit, and in the case of those Eastern Catholics who kneel, when to kneel.

I would imagine that these two stood as a protest, as most people follow the customs they observe the people around them practicing. I can’t say that I can judge the interior motives, but in the light of the entire piece, I can have a good inkling.

It reminds me of the Women’s Ordination protesters at the first ordinations at the SSPX Seminary in Ridgefield. It seemed odd that they would picket Abp. Lefebvre, and the Traditional Ordination when it was a small affair not affiliated with the Diocese or anyone who had any say in the matter.
 
There’s a difference between “short” hair as in butch [grrrrrr… RUFF!] - and short hair as in femininely short. I thought it obvious that the author was speaking of butch - like a short mullet.
 
There’s an awful lot of protestation and assumptions of rash judgement - could be. But I wouldn’t be so rash to judge the poster either and I’d give him the benefit of the doubt as well.

When I was a young lad (not that I’m really that old - 34) I witnessed an elderly gentleman, at a latin novus ordo, stand for the consecration. I was tempted to rash judgement that he was making a stand for something (pun somewhat intended) but later realized he probably had bad knees and felt standing would be more reverent than sitting.

The author could be judgemental - then again, maybe not. The chances of two butch [assumedly] women having bad knees is unlikely. But then again, they could be the only Catholics in the area belonging to the “bad knees” YAHOO group who decided to meet for breakfast after first meeting for Mass.
 
Hope this gives you ladies and gentlemen a laugh. It’s a short song by two British comedians, It is centered around the Church of England, but applies to more traditional Christians everywhere. Very cleverly done I might add.

For the record, I’m with Mrs Beamish…bring her on!!! 🙂

youtube.com/watch?v=Uc80G6Yzu04
 
Ailina said:
Hmmmm, I thought it was possible for men to dress up without wearing a suit and tie, as my brothers all do. None of them have white collar desk jobs, but work with their hands in the trades. They are not uneducated, but prefer that life.

A clean collared shirt and a neat pressed pair of pants are fine. What’s the obseesion with suits and ties? Why would my boys wear such things, when we never go to high end restaurants or out for anything requiring suit and tie? That isn’t an option in my single parent lifestyle. We rarely ever eat at ANY restaurant.

And what does wearing a suit and tie have to do with dressing modestly? If the occasion calls for it, I will wear a dress, not a suit and tie. Your post is very insulting.
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I was made to wear a suit and tie to church when I was real young.
I dont care if you find it insulting. I find it insulting when people go to church dressed like they are going to the beach, picnic or worse.

I guess wearing a suit and tie is so…last century. Heck the protestants dress better for church than us Catholics. Guess they have more respect for Christ.
 
Eric_Olsen said:
I was made to wear a suit and tie to church when I was real young.
I dont care if you find it insulting. I find it insulting when people go to church dressed like they are going to the beach, picnic or worse.

I guess wearing a suit and tie is so…last century. Heck the protestants dress better for church than us Catholics. Guess they have more respect for Christ.
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I agree with Ailina - your post was insulting. Can’t you see that there is a middle ground between suit and beachwear? Why should not wearing a suit necessarily mean that someone is going to wear the latter? At the risk of hammering the point made so often, clean, pressed and modest clothes are acceptable. Why are you so hung up on artificial formality?

Why should someone on a restricted income buy suits for her sons which are only going to be worn for once a week (and grown out of in a few months, most likely) ? If someone did, there would soon be crticisms about wasting money!

And as for the implication that people who don’t dress formally for church don’t have enough respect for Jesus Christ, words fail me.
 
paperwight said:
And as for the implication that people who don’t dress formally for church don’t have enough respect for Jesus Christ, words fail me.
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A person doesn’t have to dress “formally” to show respect for Jesus. A frightening amount of people at my OF parish routinely show up in tank tops, jogging shorts and flip-flops. Now THAT is disresepectful.
 
ibkc said:
A person doesn’t have to dress “formally” to show respect for Jesus. A frightening amount of people at my OF parish routinely show up in tank tops, jogging shorts and flip-flops. Now THAT is disresepectful.
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I live in Central Florida and attend a parish that is pretty close to all the theme parks. It’s not uncommon for folks to come to Mass in “theme park wear” and I’m usually not all that fond of it. However, this past weekend I think Jesus was trying to tell me something.

A mother and 2 teenage girls came in and sat in front of me. They were all wearing very nice dresses, clean and modest. Across the aisle, a family of four came in clearly dressed in what they had worn to Universal Studios or Disney all day-shorts, flip flops and t-shirts. Guess which family actually participated and paid attention at Mass? The mother and girls in front of me carried on conversations with each other, the girls flirted with a teenage boy across the sanctuary using sign language and one of them chewed gum through the entire Mass. In contrast, the “theme park family” sat quietly, paid close attention to the readings, sang the hymns and said all the responses-even the youngest child.

Given the choice-I’d rather sit near “theme park family” any day. I made sure to greet them afterward and compliment their children on their fine behavior. I couldn’t say anything to the nicely dressed family, they blew out of the pew as soon as the final hymn started.
 
jakobsprenger said:
Hope this gives you ladies and gentlemen a laugh. It’s a short song by two British comedians, It is centered around the Church of England, but applies to more traditional Christians everywhere. Very cleverly done I might add.

For the record, I’m with Mrs Beamish…bring her on!!! 🙂

youtube.com/watch?v=Uc80G6Yzu04
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That was funny! 😛 😃

The Brits have such a sense of humor!

I recognized Hyacinth Bouquet [pronounced ‘bucket’] from “Keeping Up Appearances” and the ‘Church Lady’ from SNL!

Yeah, jakob-bring on Mrs. Beamish!
 
Sober dress is part of a spectrum of things that help create a reverential atmosphere in a Mass. Also, I find putting on a tie gets me in a more serious frame of mind; like I’m going for a job interview.

One or two people dressed casually or formally won’t change much by themselves but if most people dress formally and you’re at a TLM and you have chant the odds of more people being disposed to receving graces attendant on the rite are increased, I’d say; there are more reminders of Heaven and less mundane distractions.

If, as a man, you find yourself trying to block out the crack in the buttocks showing above the hipster(?) jeans of the young lady in the pew in front of you, well, … maintaining a pious frame of mind is harder.
 
mkingdomlvr said:
Given the choice-I’d rather sit near “theme park family” any day. I made sure to greet them afterward and compliment their children on their fine behavior. I couldn’t say anything to the nicely dressed family, they blew out of the pew as soon as the final hymn started.
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Churches in such locations should expect this stuff from time to time. I’m thinking it is good that a family understands the “obligation” part of Sunday obligation.
 
pnewton said:
Churches in such locations should expect this stuff from time to time. I’m thinking it is good that a family understands the “obligation” part of Sunday obligation.
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I’m impressed at the number of “theme park” Catholics I see, especially during the summer. It’s 101 in the shade down here and I’m sure all these vacationers would much rather be at the water park or the hotel pool, but they come to Mass anyway. I’m sure the kids would rather be riding rides than going to Mass, but they were there, and they weren’t pouting.

My experience this past weekend reminded me that judging those folks by the clothing they wear is not how Jesus wants me to see them.
 
Layman said:
Sober dress is part of a spectrum of things that help create a reverential atmosphere in a Mass. Also, I find putting on a tie gets me in a more serious frame of mind; like I’m going for a job interview.
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Going to Mass is more important than a job interview.
One or two people dressed casually or formally won’t change much by themselves but if most people dress formally and you’re at a TLM and you have chant the odds of more people being disposed to receving graces attendant on the rite are increased, I’d say; there are more reminders of Heaven and less mundane distractions.
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Our disposition is interior and has nothing tp do with what we are wearing. Or really what those around us are wearing.
If, as a man, you find yourself trying to block out the crack in the buttocks showing above the hipster(?) jeans of the young lady in the pew in front of you, well, … maintaining a pious frame of mind is harder.
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Again, there is quite a few wardrobe choices between a suit and butt-crack showing jeans. Sitting in the very first pew would avoid having any dress issues to look at.
 
Where is that church, I’ll be sure to show up in a bikers jacket and t-shirt, see what they have to say about “my” attire. lol. I have done that in the past with churches, Catholic and Protestant alike, also take note when they shun what I tend to drive up into their parking lot since it’s not all nice and new. This status quo just has got to go away, there are way too many references in scripture that point out that it’s a sin to shun the poor and welcome those that are well to do over them, this is exactly what’s going on here and it’s shameful. If someone doesn’t perform perfectly in line with what’s going on during services, do not look down on them, just the opposite, praise his name that they are there and do your best to welcome them and make them feel at home, and this doesn’t matter what religious base you are from.
 
Errr … but the Mass is all about symbolism. It affects your interior disposition. Otherwise, why have kneeling, standing, crossing yourself, vestments, statues etc?

I actually like dressing casually; comfortable shoes, tee-shirt. Just can’t do it any more, at the TLM I sing at. You can make of that what you like.

I think of it like going to an audience with a king. It honours Him and lets my sub-conscious know that this is Serious Business.
 
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