The reason why young men are leaving the church

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Good post/points. I guess if I had to list things that I would classify as part of the feminization I would list these
  • Absent/milquetoast fathers
  • Effeminate priests
  • Priests who don’t frequently mention the need to work on virtues, the struggle against comfort, vanity, or pride
  • Priests who tell young men ‘don’t worry about pornography/masturbation/impurity’
  • Men who attend Mass lukewarmly…page through their iPhone doing texting or emails before/during Mass.
  • Mass focused around feelings…feel good hymns all the time.
  • Lack of formation activities around improving the human virtues.
  • Fathers who leave the disciplining/quieting/removing of their misbehaving children to their wives.
  • No teaching / focus on Confessing well and regularly.
 
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I agree that fathers leaving mothers to take the kids to mass is definitely a problem, a mother only has so much influence over a son as he grows older. However it still leaves the question of what caused these absent men to drift away from church themselves.
 
The answers in this thread are mostly speculative. We would need to first study if more young men than women leave the church in their youth. And ask them why they don’t go to church anymore.
 
Fundamentally the people who go to church probably are not sure why they are going the church.
They just go. May not even socialize with anyone too. Whether they are right or wrong is not the question. But rather , are they sure of what purpose they are going to church. If they have that in their mind, SOONER they will refine their purpose of going to the church.
Church is the assembly of the faithful. Holy Spirit moves a person to come for the Eucharistic celebration. The heavenly banquet. Jesus RE-PRESENTS his life over the altar, the invited TODAY. Deeply mystical. Then the breaking of the word, the bread take place. He comes to our heart.
That is his wish. We simply have to cooperate. The motive behind his call will grip us, that one will soon find that no other important thing one can do or participate than the participation of the Eucharist.
Muslims die for their religion. We do not have to. Our Lord died for us. We need to live for him.
People go to gym. Sure they are mindful of their bodies. Good.
Sadly, they are not aware of their OWN SOUL WITHIN. The paining body and the PINING SOUL.
We need to the sympathise with them. We are the privileged people who can be a reason for them to have a glimpse of their own poor souls. Once they the PRESENT YOUNG PEOPLE get a glance of their SOULS and are aware of the SOULS RESIDING in other young fellows around them, they will quiver.
Halleluia.
 
Arkansan said:
You’re right about the feminization of the Church.
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I disagree. The Church has not been feminized. The male Church simply made some room for women where there was none previously… This change is an acknowledgement of a mistake and a corrective action.
 
I have said it before and am saying it again, I do not go to church because I get my kids every weekend and she does not want the kids in Catholic mass. I cannot go against her as it is in the divorce decree that she is the one that makes that decision.

If she doesn’t want them going, I cannot bring them. So, we don’t go.
 
I actually go to 5 different churches/parishes, guess what?! I am the only single young male regularly going to mass there. 👍
 
Yes, I admit I struggle with having sympathy for this line of thought. I spent alot of time getting angry at the church for this, that, and the other thing. But in the end it was personal laziness. To paraphrase Kennedy I was asking what the Church could do for me…

… the reality is that I am part of the body of Christ and it’s MY responsibility to step up and do my part. Until I got some humility ( and I’m still working on that) it didn’t matter what the Church did. I’d find another reason to not go.

For the OP: Don’t like your parish? Volunteer. Become a youth minister to young men. Become a sacristan. See if you can work your way up to the Parish council. Best yet, invite some guys to Church or maybe start a mens group of guys your age to reinforce each other in the faith and study the bible. Maybe collectively read ‘Be a Man!’. Men in my experience need to have that community to reinforce each other. Maybe joint a CRHP group.

Don’t just say ‘I wish X would happen then all the bros would come back’.

Maybe you’re doing these things. Maybe not. But we all have to step up.
 
Dude I am so sorry. That is horrible. Do you go on the weekdays at least?

I’d be over the moon crazy if I couldn’t catechize my kids.
 
I do not go on the weekdays as I start work very early and the only weekday mass is at 8 something in the morning.

I was given dispensation not to attend mass by my priest because of my situation.
 
When most people talk about the feminization of the Church today they are usually talking about how there often seem to be more women then men with liturgical funtions at mass. For example, Eucharistic ministers seem to often be dominated by women. With the introduction of female altar servers, it seems a similar thing is going on there. The end result is this kind of image of the lone male priest at the altar surrounded by women.

This is a real issue: something in us reacts when liturgical function, which naturally belongs to men alone, is handed to women as well. If this is what you are referring to, then all of these issues are resolved by the Traditional Latin Mass. If you have not attended one, I highly recommend it.

However, if you think women outnumbering men in the pews means the feminization of the Church…you are misunderstanding something. You might be associating some kind of action at mass with your own masculinity…as in, if there are no men at mass, therefore all the “work” is being done by the women who are in attendance.

When we the faithful attend mass, we are there to receive the Body of Our Lord: we are being served and receiving something…we are not doing work. It is the priest, deacons, and altar servers, who are doing the work. If you attend the Traditional Latin Mass, you will find that all the work, by mandate, is performed by males alone, even if there are only women in the pews.

(Not that this at all diminishes the importance of those women being there, and the benefit they are gaining for themselves thereby…they are doing better than anyone who is absent.)
 
Lara said:
The answers in this thread are mostly speculative. We would need to first study if more young men than women leave the church in their youth. And ask them why they don’t go to church anymore.
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No they are not!!! I have hundreds of friends and interviewed them all at length about their faith and their relationship with the church…The church has made all necessary inquiries…So, it’s no secret why folks quit church.
 
The Church has been feminized. No talk of justice, hardly any men serving the altar anymore, it’s all cuddly, fuzzy, talk of love and how merciful God is, as if He isn’t just too.

He is just as just as He is merciful.

It’s funny because when I attend a Latin mass, I see so many men there (compared to my hometown parish where mainly women attend and are readers and extraordinary ministers) I went to the TLM a few Friday’s ago and right as I sat in the pew, like five or six men filed in line for confession. Not one woman. It was the strangest thing to see. Not only that, but there were 11 male altar servers that night, along with the three priests celebrating it. It was so lovely to see such faithful and devout men.
 
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Yes you are right. Many people do not recognize Christ in the communion Eucharist service.
But why should they?
When to many . nothing actually happens . they are not influenced . there is just disappointment.
 
No, we don’t. Even counting daily. I know that is a popular saying to bandy about, but it’s just not mathematically true.
 
How much of the Scripture do we go through, then, in a three year cycle, for you to say it is not near most?
 
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