Thread for Women Discerning Religious Life

[Bebekoualy]

I’m so glad to have found this thread!

I’m converting to the Catholic Church… and for a while now, for several months, I’ve been thinking about religious vocations and I can’t get it out of my head!! Everything seems to be happening so quickly, only last winter I was a Protestant lol! I’m 22 right now… I can’t really do any serious discerning yet cause I’m still in university, I have financial obligations (debt), I’m not even Catholic yet, lol. But hopefully some day in the future I will begin to discern, hopefully by the time I am 25…

there are so many problems, I still have to get a baptism certificate from the Orthodox church where I was baptized as a child, …I’m really trying to follow God’s leading in my conversion and have faith that eventually everything will work out.

I used to really want a relationship and eventually marriage…and now I’m really not sure…if it is God’s will for me to marry, I will marry. But at the present moment, if I had a relationship it would almost be like a distraction for me… I think about God all the time, I want to live for Him and - it seems that I can best do this by giving myself to Him entirely? I’ve been reading about the Saints and I’m so amazed at their lives and really feel a calling to …not live for myself, but be dedicated to prayer and service… and when I think about being a nun, I feel so much joy, and yet it’s really scary - on a natural level - and I know the life can be very difficult - but I feel so ‘out of place’ having a secular career…
I LOVE the idea of being a ‘bride of Christ’, that is such a beautiful and holy life.

I’ve told very few people about my thoughts, my family has no idea. I think they would be very sad if they knew (and I’m an only child and they’re not Catholics)… this breaks my heart… I love my family very much and if I were to look into an order, it would be one where I’m able to still see them…
these thoughts really scare me, I dont want to disappoint my family, I trust that God will take care of this situation, and maybe prepare them. I just don’t want to hurt my family in any way, they care for me very much.
But…God’s will be done! I know I just have to surrender to Him and put Him first in my life…

anyway it would still be several years until I’m able to really discern properly.

As to the type of orders I’d be drawn to… I am not sure… I love the traditional ones… I used to not be like this but I think God changed my heart.

For now, I’m going to Mass and I love Catholic prayers and Adoration, and I have devotions to Mary, Divine Mercy, and the Sacred Heart. So those are the things that I’m drawn to…

sorry for rambling lol

it’s been very inspiring reading your stories
may God bless each of you in your search.

monica

Hi Monica! You aren’t rambling!
I find your spiritual journey so interesting! So you’re a convert, and don’t worry about certificate and so on. God will deal with that all. You just have to learn about patience.
You don’t know about your order. To chose an order, you need to be well rooted. You’ll see you’ll have spiritual difficulties, you’ll think about Protestantism with regret, and have doubts, be in the darkness, forget about vocation, etc. I know because I just went through, and the best way is to PRAY as well as possible, the Rosary does protect you, indeed (even if I’ve got great difficulty to pray it when in trial).
I’ve the same problem with my family, they’re atheistic. Don’t worry about that. It might be hard, but God’ll help you.

It reminds me of Abbess Thaisia (very well known by the Orthodox) who was very close to her mother. She had such hardship when her mother didn’t let her in! She had to struggle to convince her to let her become a nun. Wow! But at the end, her mother’s heart changed!.. Amazing!
The name of the book is The Autobiography of a Spiritual Daughter of St. John of Kronstadt. It helps me very much in my spiritual journey. What a blessing!

Good luck!! Carry on, and never give up. The Almighty is with you and shall always be so.

 

[Carmelite_to_be]

Wow, so many women on here and each with their own journey!

For those experiencing difficulties and temptations in relation to their vocation, I would say, don’t be disheartened. Pursue your vocation if you believe God is asking that of you. It’s not easy - I know this myself, but He WILL deliver.

I spent 2 weeks in Carmel during October and it felt right. On my return, I felt in darkness and had doubts and temptations. How I got through this was remembering the graces God had so generously given me; those moments of consolation and peace that had led me to be convinced that Carmel was for me. Sure enough, the doubts and temptations passed and I am now looking forward to entering in January.

My family don’t understand at the moment; it’s hard for them. But something - and I believe it’s the Holy Spirit - makes me persevere. Maybe for others who have difficulties and yet still desire giving their lives to God can rest a little, knowing that their desire comes from Jesus, who, if only we would trust in Him, would give us the grace to make it possible. Be faced with the reality that yes, He really may be calling YOU.

Things weren’t always so clear to me, but I feel all my life has built up to this. Even during the times when I distanced myself from God, I felt that one day I would return to Him. Thankfully for me, He received me back, or I would be lost forever.

I got the job of my dreams recently, which is due to start in January, the same month I intend to go to Carmel. What a sacrifice, since I’ve had many jobs where I’ve not been happy, but how I’m thankful the He gave me the chance to offer this up to Him! To make amends for the time I turned my back on Him.

There has also been a leap of faith on my part; I could have taken a career break from waiting 3 more months to enter, which would secured my job for up to 5 years if things didn’t work out. However, I felt that this would perhaps keep me tied to the world, make it too easy to walk away if things got tough. How nice to leave all behind and follow Him, placing all trust in Him! It’s a risk, but as I write this, I believe He won’t let me down. He is so faithful.

Whatever suffering there is in relation to a vocation, rest assured that Jesus sees it, understands and will unite Himself to you all the more for your loving acts. We don’t see Him smile in Heaven when we do these things, but I believe He does.

There’ a little more about my recent journey at: carmelaspirant.blogspot.com/ if you would like to have a look.

For all my sisters, God bless and I hope you discover your vocations and once found, that you have the courage and grace to follow them

 

[srmarymichael]

I hope you don’t mind me saying hi.

I’m still trying to figure out how to use this forum. I’m having a little trouble finding my way around!

I want to encourage all of you! Hang in there – TRUST God with your whole heart! God has a way of showing you exactly where He wants you to go when He’s ready and when you’re ready.

 

[GilChrist77]

I feel like maybe there is someone reading this who is trying to discern but is struggling with the fact that they really have a gift of motherly love and have what it takes to be a wife and mother. I understand this, I struggled with this for a long time. I learned that it is very important to know that God can use that gift in the religious life and he would never give you a gift that you won’t use. Don’t worry that you won’t get a chance to use this gift because you will get a chance to use it and even if you don’t know when that might be God does and you just have to trust in him.

JMJ+
~Betsy

 

[iamMyBeloveds]

I feel like maybe there is someone reading this who is trying to discern but is struggling with the fact that they really have a gift of motherly love and have what it takes to be a wife and mother. I understand this, I struggled with this for a long time. I learned that it is very important to know that God can use that gift in the religious life and he would never give you a gift that you won’t use. Don’t worry that you won’t get a chance to use this gift because you will get a chance to use it and even if you don’t know when that might be God does and you just have to trust in him.

JMJ+
~Betsy

J.M.+J.T.
My dear sister in Christ,
How good it was to hear your words. I was in need of such encouragement in this regard! Although I have finally come to the understanding that God can use me as a mother of souls and I will most assuredly be His bride in religious life, there are times it gets hard and I doubt, especially when I am with little children and my heart just melts around them!
Thank you for your sweet reminder that God can make all things good and will never let us down!

God bless you!
In Christ,
Elizabeth

 

[iamMyBeloveds]

I felt that this would perhaps keep me tied to the world, make it too easy to walk away if things got tough. How nice to leave all behind and follow Him, placing all trust in Him! It’s a risk, but as I write this, I believe He won’t let me down. He is so faithful. Whatever suffering there is in relation to a vocation, rest assured that Jesus sees it, understands and will unite Himself to you all the more for your loving acts. We don’t see Him smile in Heaven when we do these things, but I believe He does.

J.M.+J.T.

Dear Carmelite to be,
From one future Carmelite to another, what words of wisdom you have! I have experienced this myself in discernment, and it can be very difficult when amazing options, especially for your career are laid out in front of you. As I graduate college, I experience the same difficulty in regards to an amazing Pastoral Ministry program which sounds like such a great opportunity. I love your statement above, because you have put everything into words that I have wanted to say for so long. Yes, God is soo incredibly good and loves us so much that He gives us our choices, our free will. He puts beautiful opportunities in front of us to help us remember that Our God is a gentleman :flowers: …He will never force us to this way of life. He wants us to choose Him as He chooses us. How nice it is, though, like you said, to “leave all behind and follow Him, placing all trust in Him!” It is a risk, a leap of faith, and that trust is what brings us closer to Him. Our suffering, even with family, which I totally understand as well, is a gift to Him, a way to console His heart.
So, as future Carmelite Sisters in Christ, let’s agree to make it harder to walk away so that we can learn greater trust and dependence upon Him whom we love above all things!
I am praying for you!!
Please pray for me as I have about 9 and a half more months to go before I enter. Are you joining a cloistered Carmelite order?

In Christ, through Mary,
iamMyBeloveds

 

[ClareTherese]

**It is so beautiful to read about 2 Carmelite Sisters in Christ, almost ready to give thier all to Our Lord. I to received a wonderful email from the Capuchin Poor Clares in Amarillo, Texas. I wrote or rather went to their website, and emailed a letter to their Federation Abess. I told her of the two communities, but at the time was interested in the one in Amarillo. I told them my age, as just last week I had a birthday, and they said everything would be fine. They want me to come and do a live in as an Aspirant, possibly for a month or two. Oh, how my Lord is hearing my prayers !!! I am so overwhelmed with so much JOY, because I too feel called to the contemplative life, especially the cloistered way. Also, I am definitely Franciscan, my two best friends see it when I pray. They wear the full, dark, brown habit, with the scapular; white cord with 3 knots, rosary, white whipple around chest/neck; head and neck covering, and a black veil. They are like the Poor Clares, they do walk barefoot. The Order of Discalced Carmelites also go barefoot.They sometimes wear sandels too. My friend is a Carmel Nun in Georgetown, Ca. Her name and religious title are: Sr. Victoria Maria of the Infant King Jesus. They wear the full habit of the spanish order. The Capuchin Poor Clares came from Mexico, and have established 3 houses here. Praise Be To God. I wish everyone who is discerning and possibly going to enter, or do a live in, to share your stories with others. May the Love of Our/My Groom, be with Everyone:thumbsup: Pax Christi:nun1:

 

[iamMyBeloveds]

**It is so beautiful to read about 2 Carmelite Sisters in Christ, almost ready to give thier all to Our Lord. I to received a wonderful email from the Capuchin Poor Clares in Amarillo, Texas. I wrote or rather went to their website, and emailed a letter to their Federation Abess. I told her of the two communities, but at the time was interested in the one in Amarillo. I told them my age, as just last week I had a birthday, and they said everything would be fine. They want me to come and do a live in as an Aspirant, possibly for a month or two. Oh, how my Lord is hearing my prayers !!! I am so overwhelmed with so much JOY, because I too feel called to the contemplative life, especially the cloistered way. Also, I am definitely Franciscan, my two best friends see it when I pray. Praise Be To God. I wish everyone who is discerning and possibly going to enter, or do a live in, to share your stories with others. May the Love of Our/My Groom, be with Everyone:thumbsup: Pax Christi:nun1:

J.M.+ J.T.
Dear Clare Therese,
Praised be our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ who is so good to His future brides!
I am SO incredibly happy for you that you get to go to a live-in as an aspirant! What a wonderful opportunity to see the way of life up close, to “Come and see”. Be assured of my prayers for you as you discern the beautiful calling of giving up everything for love of Him.
I admire you and others on this forum who have been called to the beautiful and austere cloistered way of life. There are times I yearn for that way of life, so be able to have the courage and step out in faith and really detach myself, but Our Lord has not called me to be cloistered. I am entering a semi-active, semi-contemplative Carmelite order, the Carmelite Sisters of the Divine Heart of Jesus. How I love the Carmelite spirituality, probably like you love the Franciscan spirituality!
I am honored to ‘meet’ you on this forum!
Many prayers for you!

Love in Christ,
iamMyBeloveds

 

[Poor_Clare_tobe]

I hope you don’t mind me saying hi.

I’m still trying to figure out how to use this forum. I’m having a little trouble finding my way around!

I want to encourage all of you! Hang in there – TRUST God with your whole heart! God has a way of showing you exactly where He wants you to go when He’s ready and when you’re ready.

Welcome!
I know you will be a great addition to our many forum posters.
[And I don’t know about anyone else but I also got lost on site a few times at the beginning…Eventually it gets easier ]
Blessings of Peace and Good

 

[GilChrist77]

J.M.+ J.T.
Dear Clare Therese,
Praised be our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ who is so good to His future brides!
I am SO incredibly happy for you that you get to go to a live-in as an aspirant! What a wonderful opportunity to see the way of life up close, to “Come and see”. Be assured of my prayers for you as you discern the beautiful calling of giving up everything for love of Him.
I admire you and others on this forum who have been called to the beautiful and austere cloistered way of life. There are times I yearn for that way of life, so be able to have the courage and step out in faith and really detach myself, but Our Lord has not called me to be cloistered. I am entering a semi-active, semi-contemplative Carmelite order, the Carmelite Sisters of the Divine Heart of Jesus. How I love the Carmelite spirituality, probably like you love the Franciscan spirituality!
I am honored to ‘meet’ you on this forum!
Many prayers for you!

Love in Christ,
iamMyBeloveds

I agree whole heartedly with what you are saying about the cloidstered life. I also am going to enter a semi-active, semi-contemplative order in New York City. I am so glad there is someone else out there who feels the same as I do.

JMJ+
~Betsy

 

[iamMyBeloveds]

I agree whole heartedly with what you are saying about the cloidstered life. I also am going to enter a semi-active, semi-contemplative order in New York City. I am so glad there is someone else out there who feels the same as I do.

JMJ+
~Betsy

J.M.+J.T
Praised be Jesus Christ!
I’m soo glad you feel the same way! It’s nice to know we’re not alone in this! :grouphug: Are you by any chance interested in the Sisters of Life or the Franciscan Sisters of the Renewal? They are great orders.
I am praying for you!

P.S. I love your quote from the Chris Rice song: Smell the Color Nine. One of my favorite sayings is from that song too: “And I’m wondering why I’ve never, seen the signs they claim they see. A lot of special revelations, meant for everybody but me. Maybe I don’t truly know You, or maybe I just simply believe…”

 

[GilChrist77]

J.M.+J.T
Praised be Jesus Christ!
I’m soo glad you feel the same way! It’s nice to know we’re not alone in this! :grouphug: Are you by any chance interested in the Sisters of Life or the Franciscan Sisters of the Renewal? They are great orders.
I am praying for you!

P.S. I love your quote from the Chris Rice song: Smell the Color Nine. One of my favorite sayings is from that song too: “And I’m wondering why I’ve never, seen the signs they claim they see. A lot of special revelations, meant for everybody but me. Maybe I don’t truly know You, or maybe I just simply believe…”

The Sisters of Life.

JMJ+
~Betsy

 

[Bebekoualy]

I dunno why, but I feel too young to join a community now. Not 20 yet, still at University.
I’d love to finish my degree, in a couple of weeks I’ll be free. I’d love to go abroad… all over the world, to teach people in need as a voluntary. Before… joining a cloistered community, never to go out again (unless God wants so).

I’m still in love with the same cistercian community in France, but I don’t know if they would let me in… Not till I’m 25 I bet.

 

[CarmeliteGirl25]

The Sisters of Life.

JMJ+
~Betsy

I may meet you in person one day as I am seriously re-discovering my interest in the Franciscan Sisters of the Renewal. I love the Sisters of Life, but I don’t feel called to them. Their habit is beautiful, though! I love the title at the end of their name. S.V. as in “Sorrores Vitae” (Latin for “Sisters of Life”) I’ll be a CFR if God wills it.

 

[GilChrist77]

I may meet you in person one day as I am seriously re-discovering my interest in the Franciscan Sisters of the Renewal. I love the Sisters of Life, but I don’t feel called to them. Their habit is beautiful, though! I love the title at the end of their name. S.V. as in “Sorrores Vitae” (Latin for “Sisters of Life”) I’ll be a CFR if God wills it.

That is so cool! I hope we do get to meet sometime!

JMJ+
~Betsy

 

[CarmeliteGirl25]

That is so cool! I hope we do get to meet sometime!

JMJ+
~Betsy

I think I need to change my screename, LOL.

 

[Poor_Clare_tobe]

I think I need to change my screename, LOL.

Carmelite Girl

happy thanksgiving and how is your discernment going? Weren’t you going to do a live in soon?? do update us all on your journey and may you have many blessings!
Peace and All That Is Good!

 

[CarmeliteGirl25]

Carmelite Girl

happy thanksgiving and how is your discernment going? Weren’t you going to do a live in soon?? do update us all on your journey and may you have many blessings!
Peace and All That Is Good!

Happy Thanksgiving to you, Poor Clare tobe! My discernment is going well, although, it has taken an unexpected path! I think my heart is in the Franciscans, specifically the Franciscan Sisters of the Renewal in NYC. I am no where near doing a live-in, just yet. I was thinking about visiting the Brooklyn Carmel in this next year, but I think I may also make a visit to either the CFR convent in NYC or the Bronx, whichever allows me. I am still discerning Carmel, but it’s hard to ignore my possible calling to the CFRs.

I was on retreat with them again this year (went last year, too; CFRs–both friars and sisters–and Sisters of Life were there; Sister Servants of the Home of the Mother joined us too), and there was a pleading in my heart from Jesus to consider them again. My heart would be so gladdened in either order, but the Franciscans are dear to me since they are so austere (the Carmelites are as well, but St. Francis really makes me smile). I think St. Francis may have adopted me early on because my middle name is Frances and I have always loved animals. I can really relate to him in a lot of things.

I smile whenever I think of the CFRs and I can’t wait to meet them on their turf I hope that, if and when I visit, they put me to work so I can really get into the daily grind of their life. I want to see what they are all about. If they allow me to, and I find this is the order for me after 1 or 2 visits, I will start the candidacy process if I feel it’s time.

How is your discernment going, Poor Clare tobe? Just think! You may be my future Franciscan sister in Christ!

 

[Poor_Clare_tobe]

Happy Thanksgiving to you, Poor Clare tobe! My discernment is going well, although, it has taken an unexpected path! I think my heart is in the Franciscans, specifically the Franciscan Sisters of the Renewal in NYC. I am no where near doing a live-in, just yet. I was thinking about visiting the Brooklyn Carmel in this next year, but I think I may also make a visit to either the CFR convent in NYC or the Bronx, whichever allows me. I am still discerning Carmel, but it’s hard to ignore my possible calling to the CFRs.

I was on retreat with them again this year (went last year, too; CFRs–both friars and sisters–and Sisters of Life were there; Sister Servants of the Home of the Mother joined us too), and there was a pleading in my heart from Jesus to consider them again. My heart would be so gladdened in either order, but the Franciscans are dear to me since they are so austere (the Carmelites are as well, but St. Francis really makes me smile). I think St. Francis may have adopted me early on because my middle name is Frances and I have always loved animals. I can really relate to him in a lot of things.

I smile whenever I think of the CFRs and I can’t wait to meet them on their turf I hope that, if and when I visit, they put me to work so I can really get into the daily grind of their life. I want to see what they are all about. If they allow me to, and I find this is the order for me after 1 or 2 visits, I will start the candidacy process if I feel it’s time.

How is your discernment going, Poor Clare tobe? Just think! You may be my future Franciscan sister in Christ!

How wonderful that you seem to be narrowing your search to specific communities. Hopefully as you visit them you will get a clearer picture of what community you might fit in. I will continue to pray for you and all those on this wonderful journey.

As to my discernment? It seems to be on track… I have found a community that I would fit into and that would accept me… the sticking point now is just paying off those student loans which take a while and there are so few people available to help women who are discerning these days. So I continue to do my part knowing that God is doing His.
Keep us all informed… I am sure many who are just starting their discernment process post here and hopefully find inspiration from the many people on the vocational journey… yours is one of them!!
Blessings of Peace and All Good!

 

[CarmeliteGirl25]

How wonderful that you seem to be narrowing your search to specific communities. Hopefully as you visit them you will get a clearer picture of what community you might fit in. I will continue to pray for you and all those on this wonderful journey.

As to my discernment? It seems to be on track… I have found a community that I would fit into and that would accept me… the sticking point now is just paying off those student loans which take a while and there are so few people available to help women who are discerning these days. So I continue to do my part knowing that God is doing His.
Keep us all informed… I am sure many who are just starting their discernment process post here and hopefully find inspiration from the many people on the vocational journey… yours is one of them!!
Blessings of Peace and All Good!

I will keep you posted of my discernment! I have really contemplated my vocation since I have gotten home and my attraction to the order of CFR’s that was at the retreat is still there, so I am looking up plane tickets. I will probably have to wait until I get a job, but I want to be prepared!