Top 10 reasons women should dress modestly

[Edward_H]

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Being a fiction writer and a comic book geek, I’ve seen my fair share of how fickle people can be when they define something as beautiful.

You’re talking to a man who is more drawn to internal charm and character.

You’re talking to a man who would sooner remember old ladies who showed him kindness than young girls wearing the latest trend.

I find it rather ironic that someone like you requires appearances to appreciate your lady friend’s internal character.

Yeah, we don’t get how people like you can be proud for being so shallow.

My point was that there is only God’s beauty…all beauty comes from God. So…if one is beautiful…they ought to do what they can to point back to God.

Think of beauty as some sort of divine pyramid. Nature, people, loving acts…all from God, revealing in vague outlines God’s beauty.

 

[Lost_Wanderer]

Small town. But you are not beaten up for carrying books. And you are suspended from school for fighting. Or is it different in the city? We have video cameras in the school and on all school buses. Also, outside of school, it is assault if someone beats you up. Verbal abuse happens all the time. But when it gets physical, charges are pressed.

An example, a kid threatened to beat up another kid on the bus. My son got in the middle. Said that the kid needed to go through him first. It was reported. First question, was whether or not my son touch the bully. If my kid had physically touch the kid, he would have been suspended.

That sounds like something I wish my school had years ago.

Sadly that wasn’t the case. And yes, even my own parents pointed out that the reason why people picked on me was because I looked like a smart-aleck. It’s too bad that was only what little support they gave me throughout all that.

People here associate big books with intelligence. They also associate skill with the English language as another sign. Throw that in with glasses and the fact that they always see me in the library and you’ve just entered the mind of my country’s version of the dumb jock.

I admit it was more verbal than physical. However, would you consider it physical that they goaded me into chasing them because I finally lost my temper? I also got into a fair number of fights.

The point is though, people thought I was something that I was not just because I appeared to ‘look’ the part to them. It’s the same way guys from both the Party of Modesty and the Party of Sex see “immodest” women as hookers because they obnoxiously assume that they look the part.

 

[Lost_Wanderer]

My point was that there is only God’s beauty…all beauty comes from God. So…if one is beautiful…they ought to do what they can to point back to God.

This does not address man’s fickle understanding of physical beauty. The existence of the concept of beauty does not make for proof of that concepts absolute form.

In fact, were one to consider that God is the ultimate creator of the soul, one would think that true beauty lies within and not upon the container in which it is held.

Think of beauty as some sort of divine pyramid. Nature, people, loving acts…all from God, revealing in vague outlines God’s beauty.

When I look at people, I see only one thing and that is their actions. Hence my disinterest in what they look like. God said so Himself than only fallible man sees the appearances but He chooses to see into the heart.

 

[severus68]

You don’t think how we dress is part of guiding our life? I am trying to give all my life to God.

I think a bikini is immodest. She thinks a bikini is modest. But she said that she knows God thinks it is fine. How would you feel if I said I know that God thinks it is wrong? Neither of us knows how God feels.

I have no issues with prayer. Maybe you do but I for one do not pray for guidance on all my actions 24/7. I will not be able to do much else. I would pray on matters I have doubts on or when I need Divine help on making decisions. I would not pray on eating a chocolate. If she does not think a bikini is immodest, why would she not think God would be ok with? She is not speaking for anyone else but for herself.

 

[Edward_H]

This does not address man’s fickle understanding of physical beauty. The existence of the concept of beauty does not make for proof of that concepts absolute form.

In fact, were one to consider that God is the ultimate creator of the soul, one would think that true beauty lies within and not upon the container in which it is held.

When I look at people, I see only one thing and that is their actions. Hence my disinterest in what they look like. God said so Himself than only fallible man sees the appearances but He chooses to see into the heart.

Some good points here.

 

[Debora123]

*]Do these clothes show the beauty that God gave me?

I think I dress in a way that makes me look pretty, but that’s my opinion. Not everyone will agree. Some people might think my clothes make me look really ugly. It’s all a matter of opinion.

*]Am I dressing in this way to please God?

Weird question… I don’t think God cares what I wear or what I look like, as long as it’s not done with any ill intent or disrespect to myself.

*]Am I dressing in this way to please my husband?

No, my style has been the same since I was in high school and before I even met Brian.

*]Am I dressing in this way to “fit in”?

You mean to fit in like wearing something I don’t like just because everyone else is? No. If I don’t like something, I won’t wear it.

*]Do I look for security/dignity/esteem in how others see me?

I try to be a good person and treat everyone with respect. I think this makes people see me in a positive light. Of course, I can’t always please everyone and I’m sure there will be ppl who don’t like me, but I try to do my best and treat others well.

*]Am I showing off? Am I trying to draw attention to myself?

Depends on what you mean by showing off and drawing attention to myself. I try to look pretty wherever I go and I always appreciate a nice compliment just as much as the next person. But it’s not like my goal is to try to get ppl to look at me or anything. I don’t do anything shocking to my appearance that screams out to others to look at me. My style is pretty standard and ordinary… not attention seeking.

*]Will this outfit reveal my endowment publicly?

No

*]If my husband likes me to dress sexily in public, do I know why?

My husband thinks I look sexy and beautiful no matter what I do. He likes all my clothes and thinks I always look attractive.

*]What true good can come out of me dressily sexily in public?

Depends on what you mean by “sexily.” If you mean attractively, I guess the only good that will come out of it is I will feel good about my physicality, and I will feel pretty and feminine. it’s an unnecessary pleasure - like having a bite out of a chocolate cake, except without the unhealthy aspect. Nothing wrong with that.

*]Might other women feel less if I reveal more?

I have no idea. I don’t reveal more than the average women around here. if she did, it would be extremely petty and uncalled for on her part.

*]Might other men feel less of their wives, if I reveal more?

If a man’s devotion to his wife is so fickle/weak to a point where another woman walking by will make him feel less for his wife then there’s definitely a more serious problem with him or with his marriage. And he and his wife should be in marital counseling.

*]Will any children be present?

Uh… yeah? So? I don’t even own any dominatrix outfits or anything. And if I did I wouldn’t wear them out in public.

*]Do I dress in conversation with God?

No, I don’t pray while I’m getting dressed every morning. Do YOU?

Am I trying to please only Him?

Please refer to question #2.

Do you ask yourself all these questions before getting dressed in the morning Edward? (with substituting husband for wife and men for women)

Do you ask similar questions (regarding pleasing God) in reference to other things you do in daily life? Like before you eat desert, watch a movie, read a book, go to the park, etc etc?

 

[Debora123]

You don’t think how we dress is part of guiding our life? I am trying to give all my life to God.

I think a bikini is immodest. She thinks a bikini is modest. But she said that she knows God thinks it is fine. How would you feel if I said I know that God thinks it is wrong? Neither of us knows how God feels.

Do you know that God thinks wearing pants is fine?

 

[Debora123]

Small town. But you are not beaten up for carrying books. And you are suspended from school for fighting. Or is it different in the city? We have video cameras in the school and on all school buses. Also, outside of school, it is assault if someone beats you up. Verbal abuse happens all the time. But when it gets physical, charges are pressed.

An example, a kid threatened to beat up another kid on the bus. My son got in the middle. Said that the kid needed to go through him first. It was reported. First question, was whether or not my son touch the bully. If my kid had physically touch the kid, he would have been suspended.

Bullying doesn’t always refer to physical abuse. Many MANY young children in this country commit suicide bc of being bullied in school. It’s been a hot topic recently. I’m surprised you are downplaying bullying, considering everything that’s been going on with young children.

 

[Edward_H]

Do you ask yourself all these questions before getting dressed in the morning Edward? (with substituting husband for wife and men for women)

Do you ask similar questions (regarding pleasing God) in reference to other things you do in daily life? Like before you eat desert, watch a movie, read a book, go to the park, etc etc?

Thank you. Debora…Excellent…many thanks for you efforts for me and others.

We can please God. Isn’t that marvelous? We have the power to please God, by desiring to please Him before we please others, or ourselves.

I wake every morning with a morning offering to God, and then I proceed to the bathroom where I continue my prayer and change over for the day, while my beautiful wife sleeps.

Yes…I bring God into many many aspects of my daily life. I pray when I start work…pray the Angelus at noon…say aspirations often during the day…pray the Rosary on the way home…etc.

It’s brought me much serenity and resiliency. And it helped me when I was Iraq. Praying always and rejoicing always. Our Father is ready to accompany us and help us whenever we call to Him.

 

[Debora123]

My point was that there is only God’s beauty…all beauty comes from God. So…if one is beautiful…they ought to do what they can to point back to God.

Think of beauty as some sort of divine pyramid. Nature, people, loving acts…all from God, revealing in vague outlines God’s beauty.

Someone can be beautiful to your taste but ugly to someone else. Beautify is too subjective to be putting so much into it as you are.

 

[Debora123]

When I look at people, I see only one thing and that is their actions. Hence my disinterest in what they look like. God said so Himself than only fallible man sees the appearances but He chooses to see into the heart.

I applaud you. More men should strive to be like you.

 

[Edward_H]

Someone can be beautiful to your taste but ugly to someone else. Beautify is too subjective to be putting so much into it as you are.

This is a popular belief…but that would mean God’s beauty is also subjective.

No. All truth, all light, all goodness, and all beauty converge toward the Truth, Light, Goodness, and Beauty.

A woman who is only beautiful on the outside eventually turns ugly. Music and lyrics that don’t speak the truth, eventually lose their appeal.

This is why I pointed to that woman I met who seems to have a depth of beauty…and her way is to point to God. Truly remarkable.

 

[Debora123]

This is a popular belief…but that would mean God’s beauty is also subjective.

No. All truth, all light, all goodness, and all beauty converge toward the Truth, Light, Goodness, and Beauty.

A woman who is only beautiful on the outside eventually turns ugly. Music and lyrics that don’t speak the truth, eventually lose their appeal.

This is why I pointed to that woman I met who seems to have a depth of beauty…and her way is to point to God. Truly remarkable.

Mmmm no. We are talking here about the physical beauty of a woman. That can be very subjective.

For example - Angelina Jolie is the most physically beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. I’ve had guys out there tell me they think she’s extremely ugly.

 

[Edward_H]

Mmmm no. We are talking here about the physical beauty of a woman. That can be very subjective.

For example - Angelina Jolie is the most physically beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. I’ve had guys out there tell me they think she’s extremely ugly.

No…beauty comes in forms…all of these reflect a beauty that comes from God. A woman can be beautiful externally, and ugly inside.

An act of charity can be beautiful on the outside, but ugly inside (a man stops to help a woman only to take advantage of her).

Beauty can have depth…only some beauty is superficial.

Jolie is widely rated as beautiful…there is some truth in this based on these numbers…how much truth and how much depth there is to her beauty only God knows.

She’s adopting children…beautiful. Some evidence of depth to her physical beauty.

When she’s close to death we’ll have a better view of her full beauty.

Did she give herself unstintingly to God, to her husband, and her growing family? Did she self-sacrifice, self-donate?

Don’t know yet. As I don’t know with even myself.

 

[Debora123]

No…beauty comes in forms…all of these reflect a beauty that comes from God. A woman can be beautiful externally, and ugly inside.

An act of charity can be beautiful on the outside, but ugly inside (a man stops to help a woman only to take advantage of her).

Beauty can have depth…only some beauty is superficial.

Jolie is widely rated as beautiful…there is some truth in this based on these numbers…how much truth and how much depth there is to her beauty only God knows.

She’s adopting children…beautiful. Some evidence of depth to her physical beauty.

When she’s close to death we’ll have a better view of her full beauty.

Did she give herself unstintingly to God, to her husband, and her growing family? Did she self-sacrifice, self-donate?

Don’t know yet. As I don’t know with even myself.

I thought you were talking about physical beauty, because you said this:

A woman who is beautiful can draw many people to God. Were she to dress modestly, she retains a powerful biological attractive force for men and women.

…sounds like physical appearances to me, but if you say you are talking about inner beauty, then fine. Fair enough.

 

[Edward_H]

I thought you were talking about physical beauty, but you are talking about inner beauty. Fair enough.

Talking about all beauty.

My personal belief is the goal is to harness all beauty to God’s glory.

The woman I mentioned above…wish you could meet her. I think there’s something beautiful about her beauty. She brings many people closer to God through her deep beauty…which continues with even more refinement and naturalness beyond her external beauty.

 

[Debora123]

Talking about all beauty.

My personal belief is the goal is to harness all beauty to God’s glory.

The woman I mentioned above…wish you could meet her. I think there’s something beautiful about her beauty. She brings many people closer to God through her deep beauty…which continues with even more refinement and naturalness beyond her external beauty.

I see.

I’d be awfully jealous if my husband was speaking this way about another woman, quite honestly.

 

[Debora123]

Haha, wow, I was just reading a thread on the spirituality section called “Is a Catholic seller allowed to sell womans shorts?”

I’m sorry, but my point exactly - these ridiculous, imaginary “Catholic modesty standards” are getting wayyy out of hand.

People on the “moral theology” section seem to be a lot more conservative/old school than some other sections on CAF.

 

[Me1234]

We shouldn’t be dressing to excite the eye, that much is obvious. If we’re not even supposed to wear jewelry people shouldn’t be surprised that catholics shouldn’t show much of the parts of the external body like so many people in the pop culture do.

1 Peter Chapter 3:1-6 NAB
1 Likewise, you wives should be subordinate to your husbands so that, even if some disobey the word, they may be won over without a word by their wives’ conduct
2 when they observe your reverent and chaste behavior.
3 Your adornment should not be an external one: braiding the hair, wearing gold jewelry, or dressing in fine clothes,
4 but rather the hidden character of the heart, expressed in the imperishable beauty of a gentle and calm disposition, which is precious in the sight of God.
5 For this is also how the holy women who hoped in God once used to adorn themselves and were subordinate to their husbands;
6 thus Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him “lord.” You are her children when you do what is good and fear no intimidation.

and

Compendium OF THE CATECHISM OF THE CATHOLIC CHURCH

1. What are the other requirements for purity?

2521-2527
2533

Purity requires modesty which, while protecting the intimate center of the person, expresses the sensitivity of chastity. It guides how one looks at others and behaves toward them in conformity with the dignity of persons and their communion. Purity frees one from wide-spread eroticism and avoids those things which foster morbid curiosity. Purity also requires a purification of the social climate by means of a constant struggle against moral permissiveness which is founded on an erroneous conception of human freedom.

and

1 Timothy Chapter 2:9-11 NAB
9 Similarly, (too,) women should adorn themselves with proper conduct, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hairstyles and gold ornaments, or pearls, or expensive clothes,
10 but rather, as befits women who profess reverence for God, with good deeds.
11 A woman must receive instruction silently and under complete control.

It’s pretty obvious today that many people are dressing off of the mark of modesty’s standards.

 

[severus68]

This does not address man’s fickle understanding of physical beauty. The existence of the concept of beauty does not make for proof of that concepts absolute form.

In fact, were one to consider that God is the ultimate creator of the soul, one would think that true beauty lies within and not upon the container in which it is held.

When I look at people, I see only one thing and that is their actions. Hence my disinterest in what they look like. God said so Himself than only fallible man sees the appearances but He chooses to see into the heart.

Excellent post. To me a preoccupation with modesty is a preoccupation with outward appearance.