Using most of the MGTOW Philosophy in choosing the right women?

[Sarcelle]

Someone with such an image will only attract people who want to use and dominate.

Narcissistic sociopaths tend to be attracted to vulnerable people.

 

[Xantippe]

Then you don’t like men to be leaders?

Married lady here. I’ve had the same exact husband for the last 21 years and I’m a pretty good wife and a pretty good mom to three kids (two teens and a little kid). Took a while to get there, though.

Speaking from my own experience in leadership in my family and my experience with my husband’s leadership:

–Leadership is great, when it’s responsive to (name removed by moderator)ut, when it’s in the right direction and when it’s accompanied by the person working side by side with you at least part of the time and having some sort of hands-on knowledge of what they want you to do. (Don’t we all loooove (name removed by moderator)ut from bosses who have never done our job?)
–Micromanagement is unpleasant and inefficient.
–The more involved and responsible one is, the bigger a leadership role is possible
–Motherhood involves a lot of leadership.
–Speaking as a mom, I give my teens (who are very good kids and work very hard) a fair amount of slack. I expect a similar amount of slack from my husband. I also give the kids a lot of respect and expect (and give) a lot of respect to my husband. Respect is good! Everybody needs respect!
–People should get more and more responsibility and trust the more they demonstrate that they are responsible and trustworthy.
–A home with 2+ school age kids is a very complex mechanism. It’s really not possible for a guy to know everything that’s going on at home if he’s away 40-80 hours a week (or is deployed!). Hence, he really has to be able to trust his wife’s judgment much of the time. Also, he is going to be largely dependent on the flow of information that his wife shares with him, which again means that he is largely dependent on her judgment.
–My husband has been overseas for the last 4 weeks (returning today). We’ve been in daily touch by text and email. I have consulted him about this and that, but given the practicalities (6 time zones away), I’ve made a lot of decisions. I’m waiting for him to come back to make a decision about choice of contractors for a project, but day-to-day, it’s been me.
–In my experience, my husband doesn’t actually have a lot of patience for dealing with the little stuff. A lot of husbands are like that. They just want the executive summary rather than the 400-page report version.
–Married couples have to be flexible and able to take on each other’s responsibilities when the situation calls for it. Being rigid about roles makes for a less functional and less productive family unit.

 

[niceatheist]

–Married couples have to be flexible and able to take on each other’s responsibilities when the situation calls for it. Being rigid about roles makes for a less functional and less productive family unit.

This! So much this! I’ve never had a desire to have a wife who is basically rendered comatose if I’m not around to give instructions or advice. Sure, that means my wife might muck it up on occasion, but then again, I muck it up on occasion as well. Sometimes decisions have to be made, and a wife has to be as willing to take on the duty and responsibility as a husband. It’s a partnership.

It takes effort, and it takes trust, and sometimes one partner is just simply going to be better at some aspects of running a family than the other. Leadership isn’t just about giving commands, and those that fail the most spectacularly, whether it’s in running a family or a business, are those who seem to think they sit on some sort of throne and dictate from on high.