Vasectomy question - help

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You are willing to live as brother and sister, but your wife isn’t? Odd considering she would be the one with the heath dangers.
 
FishyPete said:
Update:

Last night my wife and I had a brief but frank discussion about this. We opened up some dialogue which is really good.

We then prayed together, and asked for guidance.

It was a positive thing that led us away from this rash decision.

I wanted to let everyone know because I believe prayers assisted with this (If anyone prayed).
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I’m so happy to hear you were able to open the line of communication up with your wife and ask God for guidance. It’s always a good first step .

I did pray for you and I will continue to do so. ’

Blessings,

Mary.
 
My mother had tubal ligation and always went to mass communion etc. I agree. You need a priest. I hope compassion would dictate at the lesser of the two evils
 
FishyPete said:
Update:

Last night my wife and I had a brief but frank discussion about this. We opened up some dialogue which is really good.

We then prayed together, and asked for guidance.

It was a positive thing that led us away from this rash decision.

I wanted to let everyone know because I believe prayers assisted with this (If anyone prayed).
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Forget any of the negative responses you received here. This^^^^ is what will help you both to a resolution. Like the other have said talk to your priest.
 
What negative responses? I think everyone said go see the priest and a counselor.
 
pianistclare said:
I think you’re reading quite a bit into people’s responses.
Unsubscribing.
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pianistclare - I believe we are all entitled to post an opinion regarding the thread as long as we are not uncharitable. I don’t think it is your place to chastise one poster because you personally disagree with that posters comments.
 
Hoosier_Daddy said:
Could you specifically point these posts out?
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In all charity, I think it’s time to end this discussion. The OP and his wife have come to a good place and we will continue to pray for them.
The trouble with these threads is they go on long after they are profitable for the person posting.
May God bless and keep them in his care.

.
 
Viki63 said:
In all charity, I think it’s time to end this discussion. The OP and his wife have come to a good place and we will continue to pray for them.
The trouble with these threads is they go on long after they are profitable for the person posting.
May God bless and keep them in his care.

.
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The topic of vasectomy and forgiveness is a popular one. Many many people have ideas about it. Sometimes false ones. These threads and forums are not just to serve the OP. CAF is not equipped to function as a one on one discussion forum. The topic is here for us to discuss.

I hope “charitable” is not being used as a virtue above truth and authentic Catholic teaching.
 
Hoosier_Daddy said:
The topic of vasectomy and forgiveness is a popular one. Many many people have ideas about it. Sometimes false ones. These threads and forums are not just to serve the OP. CAF is not equipped to function as a one on one discussion forum. The topic is here for us to discuss.

I hope “charitable” is not being used as a virtue above truth and authentic Catholic teaching.
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Actually if the latter does not express the former is it truly authentic or valid in any way , or ?truth ?

And if we speak only in generalities does not the same apply?
 
Hoosier_Daddy said:
Sure. I’m currious what you find uncharitable.
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Rather than getting into an argument with you, I suggest you go back and re-read some of your posts. That being said, I’m out.

OP I pray that you and your wife find consolation in the resolution of this matter. You, your wife, and your priest can work through this with God’s grace. Peace.
 
Hoosier_Daddy said:
She sounds wonderful…

Look, you posted on a public board about how your wife wants you to mutilate yourself.

Despite the inevitable abortion that would follow an accidental pregnancy after the vastectomy you really need to clear your head

If a woman posted on here how her husband was going to force her to mutilate herself, sin, and jeapordize her soul to hell, and she felt as if she had no choice we would almost all identify her as abused and controlled and we would advise talking to a priest, a counselor, and perhaps the authorities. Even more so if after posts about the problem she told us how he was a really nice guy who just doesn’t understand and is misunderstood but she looooooves hiiiiim…

Please seek help. See a counselor immediately and seek a safe environment.
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This may not be what you intended, but it comes off as uncharitable to me to imply that his wife would have an abortion. Unless I missed a post where he stated that.
 
LittleWay92 said:
This may not be what you intended, but it comes off as uncharitable to me to imply that his wife would have an abortion. Unless I missed a post where he stated that.
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In the first post he describes his wife as mentally and physically ill, she is making demands of her spouse that includes mutilation and sterilization as a form of birth control. The culture of death goes beyond abortion. Birth control is very much a part of it. Perhaps the wrong word was inevitable. A better word would have been “likely”
A woman who bites into the apple of the culture of death, passes that apple to her husband in the form of mutilation and sterilization has turned her back on the culture of life. And if that form of birth control fails, and believe me they can fail, the likely candidates for abortion are those who are mentally stressed, pressured and do not have the guidance of the Church.

A woman who would be faced with a surprise pregnancy, forced her husband to harm himself with the threat of the marriage behind it. (Shouting disregard to life, and the Church, and the Sacrament, facing medical issues, facing mental issues,
Would certainly be a candidate for abortion.

I am glad you pointed this out though because in going back and rereading the thread, the op, dismisses NFP as an option because of cycles. HOWEVER, that is almost never the case. There are many methods of NFP and they can be practiced conservatively. Also note the 13! Years of separation between the kids. Whatever method artificial or not they were using May have failed. If the baby was unplanned, Her reaction was one that is anti marriage and anti life.
I don’t think the abortion scenario is so out of line that it would be “uncharitable”. However, at least this gave us the opportunity to discuss NFP! So that’s good.
 
Viki63 said:
…
The trouble with these threads is they go on long after they are profitable for the person [initially] posting.
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That may be true, but the OP has no “ownership” of the thread or the course it follows. This is the nature of internet discussion forums.
 
Hoosier_Daddy said:
You have a wife that wishes to condemn your soul for her own sake. Don’t do it. Seek spiritual help and also counseling immediately.
If your wife has no problem with birth control or sterilization she can take that up with her own conscience. Yours however must remain faithful. And no, the choice is not mutilate yourself or lose your family. That’s just ridiculous.
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This is pretty much spot on. Although I am sure that, as you mentioned, your wife is not herself due to her conditions - I’m not judging her, but I am agreeing that it is not (or should not be) a case of vasectomy or divorce.

I really think you HAVE to talk to a priest about this ASAP.

ETA: Didn’t read the rest of the thread before posting, glad you two are in a better place now OP.
 
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