Vatican announces desire for more restrained sign of peace at Mass

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janeway529 said:
Best of luck to any priest or bishop that tries to enforce it. It’s like trying to ban the holding of hands during the Our Father. It is what it is. 🤷
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Our pastor was ahead of the curve, evidently. For months, he has been prefacing the “now offer each other the Sign of Peace” with an admonition that this be done quietly and reverently. There are some who don’t comply but most do and the general tone is very reserved.

As for the Our Father, the school where my kids attended got a new pastor a few years ago. One of his first instructions was to stop holding hands during the Our Father and almost everyone did what he asked.

It can certainly succeed if our pastors are not afraid of being clear, calm and consistent.
 
Tarpeian_Rock said:
“Sweaty pensioners?” Actually, the elderly people I know actually long for a bit of human touch, human contact, alone as they after are, with family long distances away.

But that aside, I’m all for restraint and have never been a fan of the aisle-crossing congregation-churning form of the Sign of Peace. But neither is bowing a traditional gesture of peace in the West, and a church full of heads bobbing in all directions doesn’t strike me as restrained either. I think a handshake is both traditional and restrained, so long as it isn’t part of a liturgical conga-line. Actually, I love how Peace is exchanged in the Maronite Rite - you can look that up.
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You don’t live in Australia, everyone is sweaty. I agree that pensioners miss the love of the human touch and my wife volunteers at nursing homes giving help and hand massages for just such a need, so I understand your rebuke. However the Mass is not the place for therapeutic kindness, it is for the adoration of our God. I feel this part of the Mass has gone overboard.
 
I find this thread very informative on the reception of the Mass. I also feel lucky to meet in a parish where most of the mass attendees will quickly ask about what is in the GIRM when any matter about liturgy is raised. Catechesis and the raising of consciousness appears to be needed in many places.

I am still wondering under what circumstance it may be inappropriate to exchange a kiss of peace? Would we approach this exchange differently if we were truly aware of the host of heaven present at the moment we are affirming our union in discipleship where Christ has crossed the threshold and spoken His word, “Peace be with you.”

Christ be our light.
 
Thorns said:
I have to ask, does God really care how us mere tiny humans exchange peace at Mass? It all sounds kind of legalistic and unimportant to me.
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It momentarily changes the focus of the liturgy from adoration of Christ to man - for me personally, the timing of it disrupts the prayer and sacrificial nature of the liturgy.
 
Della said:
I too would like to see the sign of peace eliminated or seriously cut back to a simple bow to each other. As for “making peace” before receiving communion, wouldn’t that be better done before Mass begins? And what if you aren’t anywhere near the person you need to make peace with or that person isn’t at the same Mass?

Frankly, if people have issues with each other they aren’t going to solve their differences at the sign of peace. The Mass is sacrifice and worship more than a mere communal gathering, after all. Everyone who has serious sins should have gone to confession and resolved such issues first.

We are at Mass primarily to worship God in spirit and in truth, to hear the word of God proclaimed, and to receive the body and blood, soul and divinity of Christ in community with our brethren. Any making peace with each other ought to take place beforehand, IMHO. The sign of peace ought to a sign that we are already united in purpose–to be at Mass with the right disposition with God and others. Or am I wrong about that?
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Wonderful post!!
 
Tigg said:
Wonderful post!!
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Thank you. Another thing that’s a problem for many is people is having their hands gripped too hard. A firm handshake shouldn’t hurt, but I’m 65 with arthritis in my hands plus FMS. I’ve had others grab my hand and squeeze it so hard it nearly brought tears to my eyes because it hurt. Afterwards I’ve had to rub my hand to try to mitigate the pain. Or they’ve not let go and yanked my arm up at the second part of the Our Father. I don’t hold hands for the Our Father except with my husband, now. And, I’ve learned to extend my hand palm down at the sign of peace because people tend to take my hand more gently and not squeeze the life out of it. As our population ages these are becoming real issues that others need to be aware of.

As for hand sanitizer, if someone with a cold thoughtlessly shakes hands with me I have no problem getting out the hand santitizer and using it. If I get a any flu/cold virus it becomes bronchitis which lasts for weeks. I don’t care what others think when it comes to taking care of my health. 😉
 
Sorry, not to be too touchy/feely, but my honest opinion is that if Christ was reading this thread, he’d be crying. The extent of love and mercy you are capable of showing (genuinely and spontaneously) to your fellow human beings is the same amount you’ll get from him. If you can’t do this at Mass before Christ, you can’t do it anywhere.
 
FollowChrist34 said:
Sorry, not to be too touchy/feely, but my honest opinion is that if Christ was reading this thread, he’d be crying. The extent of love and mercy you are capable of showing (genuinely and spontaneously) to your fellow human beings is the same amount you’ll get from him. If you can’t do this at Mass before Christ, you can’t do it anywhere.
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Ah no, Christ would not be “crying.” :rolleyes: People are merely sharing their concerns about how the Mass is conducted and about personal boundaries. No one has the right to grab and yank other’s hands and arms. Or to walk all over the nave greeting people like they were at a picnic during Mass. The liturgies of the Church are to be conducted with due reverence and respect in a communal setting. No one has a license to do whatever they want. No ones rights are being violated nor has anyone shown a lack of charity merely by discussing what is and isn’t proper for the Mass. It’s why we have the GIRM and other guidelines for such things from the Vatican.
 
mkoopman said:
I find this thread very informative on the reception of the Mass. I also feel lucky to meet in a parish where most of the mass attendees will quickly ask about what is in the GIRM when any matter about liturgy is raised. Catechesis and the raising of consciousness appears to be needed in many places.

I am still wondering under what circumstance it may be inappropriate to exchange a kiss of peace? Would we approach this exchange differently if we were truly aware of the host of heaven present at the moment we are affirming our union in discipleship where Christ has crossed the threshold and spoken His word, “Peace be with you.”

Christ be our light.
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Well stated. Welcome to CAF!
Peace to you, friend.
 
Della said:
Ah no, Christ would not be “crying.” :rolleyes: People are merely sharing their concerns about how the Mass is conducted and about personal boundaries. No one has the right to grab and yank other’s hands and arms. Or to walk all over the nave greeting people like they were at a picnic during Mass. The liturgies of the Church are to be conducted with due reverence and respect in a communal setting. No one has a license to do whatever they want. No ones rights are being violated nor has anyone shown a lack of charity merely by discussing what is and isn’t proper for the Mass. It’s why we have the GIRM and other guidelines for such things from the Vatican.
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Agreed, I want an ordered, deeply reverential Mass. And I have left parishes where I thought Mass was too chaotic and touchy/feely (the passion presented as an interpretive dance).

It’s like the crying baby. I see people turning and glaring at the parents who are just dying of embarrassment and stress already. (I want them to remove the kid too, but I don’t glare at them.) It’s a lack of basic human fellow feeling. I am the last person to dispense with decorum. At my parish we don’t hold hands during the Lord’s Prayer. I am fine with that. If we held hands, I would be fine with that. Bottom line is I would just never express myself with this kind of negative commentary about interacting with my fellow parishioners. In my opinion, it’s trivial and sanctimonious.
 
Peace and All Good!!
LongingSoul said:
I hope this measure can be adopted with seriousness and understanding of how important it is to be ready to approach Communion with reverence and quiet.
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:amen:

Absolutely, with the Sign of Peace occurring when it currently does with in the Mass, this is one of my concerns-at a point when we’re so close to receiving Our Divine Lord, I think this is where our focus needs to be.

If it is to be kept, I would certainly be in favour of the Sign of Peace happening at another time of the Mass, so that attention can be given more easily & fully to due preparation at such an important time in the Mass
 
At my parish, during the sign of peace, people who know one another hug and kiss within their own group. The rest of us offer brief handshakes or nods, depending upon the distance between us.

I really think that hugging and kissing can be done among family members at any time. So I find it odd that they carry on with one another while ignoring their fellow worshipers.

My parish also hold hands during the Our Father. I really dislike that practice. It makes me nervous and I can’t concentrate on the prayer. All I’m thinking of is how quickly I can drop the hand of the stranger near me. I don’t think of fellow parishioners as being beneath me. I just don’t want to hold hands.
 
pnewton said:
:confused: What is meant by “familiar and worldly” I wonder? Is the intent just to make up some* new* gesture no one uses so it is* totally* non-secular?

If so, I would like to see a splaying of the middle and ring finger into a V.
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How about we take a lesson from parochial school on this?

Shake hands left, right, front back. Not spouses, sisters, or great aunts, or your bestie. Smile at little Suzie across the way, if you must. Nod, maybe.

And seriously, what’s to stop anyone here from making eye contact, placing one’s palm on one’s chest, and making a little bow while saying, “Peace be with you?”

We do it during flu season. Why not just keep doing it?

With all the examples of gladhanding and hugs, there is (anecdotally) no standard that is already in place.

Sr. Florence, my 4th grade teacher, would also add, “don’t forget to walk single file to receive Communion…no line hopping! File back to your pews. Mind your manners. Say your prayers, floss your teeth, and it’s really not that tough to make it easy for yourself!”
 
Miserissima said:
Sr. Florence, my 4th grade teacher, would also add, “don’t forget to walk single file to receive Communion…no line hopping! File back to your pews. Mind your manners. Say your prayers, floss your teeth, and it’s really not that tough to make it easy for yourself!”
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Is this a sergeant or sister?
 
During the sign of peace, should a person leave his pew, walk across the aisle, and shake hands with people in some of the pews opposite him?​
 
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