AlanFromWichita said:
I’ve heard others say the man should have final authority.
Clearly those who have said they don’t know who makes more money doens’t do the taxes!
I do the taxes in my home, and the bills, and make the investment decisions, and make most purchasing decisions, decide on the insurance we’ll have…blah, blah, blah. I tend to agree that men should “wear the pants,” but depending on what exactly you mean by that, not all men are willing or able to wear the pants, regardless of how much they make. I would love for my husband to take more responsibility for the stuff I currently do, but there are two problems with that - I like control and he likes not doing all that **** that I just mentioned! Besides, I like my bills being paid on time.
But in all seriousness, I think men should be a major part of the decisionmaking process and household-running activities. I just wish I could get my husband to get that life insurance policy I’ve been after him to get…
In my house, it has nothing to do with salaries, either. I was making almost nothing when we maried because I was in college, and I still did all the things I mentioned. I guess to me, wearing the pants has very little to do with salary and a lot to do with who wants to do the things that need to be done, and need to be done well, regardless of whether or not they want to. It has to do with making the right desisions for the family based on everyone. And neither of us has “veto power”, although to this point, we haven’t had any decisions to make that we didn’t agree on. I guess because I’m just so convincing!
On a related topic, in two earner families, whose career is important enough to uproot the family and move out of town even if to the detriment of the others’ career? What is the basis of that – the one with most future $ earning potential? Current salary? Ability to be promoted? The one who has strongest emotional attachment to job? Who cares, if I like the new city better maybe I’ll move on that basis? Is it good to move kids to new schools in new towns?
Neither- we love it where we are and would look for new jobs before we moved, although once our baby comes I will stop working.
