Why is homosexuality wrong?

[kyle91]

I´m catholic, I go to church every sunday, and I pray with my family everyday. I really believe in God. But the thing is, that I feel attracted to men, and in the bible it says it´s wrong. I´ve researched and found that there are animals that have homosexual orientation, so this means it is something that hapens in nature, why then would it be wrong if I act on my feelings, will God hate me if I do? Will I go to hell? I really don´t want to go to hell, but I don´t understand why is it that wrong, if I would not be harming anyone else by being with another man

 

[styrgwillidar]

Well, I’m hoping other Catholics who are homosexual or have same sex attraction can help guide you.

But, consider a catholic wha has been abandoned by their spouse. The Church teaches that if their marriage was valid, even if abandonend they must stay single and celibate.

They can make many of the arguments you do, they’re still attracted to people. They are still lonely, they don’t see it as hurting anyone, yet they must conform to the Church’s teaching out of respect for the sacrament of marriage.

I know this doesn’t really answer your question. But realize it’s not about the urgings or desires we have, it’s about the actions we take.

 

[EasterJoy]

It is typical for animals to eat their own young when they’re stressed, there are animals in which the male takes care of gestational duties, there are many species in which males fight in order to maintain harems of females, and so on, so let’s not even go there for an example. There is very little that cannot be found in the rest of the animal kingdom.

Secondly, no matter what your temptation is, no matter what your sin is, God isn’t going to hate you. God saw how we had fallen into sin, not knowing the difference between right and left, and God loved us, and that is why the Son of God became a man. So do not let anyone tell you that God does not love you or understand everything about you, whether difficult or easy.

Having said that, we cannot feel that just because we have feelings that occur in nature and in other people that we can use those feelings as a moral compass. Think about that. Without feelings, would there be adultery? Does doing the right thing always feel good when you’re trying to decide whether or not you want to do it? No, it’s sometimes easy, but sometimes doing the right thing feels very counter to our inclinations.

This is what the Catechism teaches about homosexuality within the context of chastity. It’s from the chapter on the 6th commandment. Consider what it has to say:

Chastity and homosexuality

**2357 **Homosexuality refers to relations between men or between women who experience an exclusive or predominant sexual attraction toward persons of the same sex. It has taken a great variety of forms through the centuries and in different cultures. Its psychological genesis remains largely unexplained. Basing itself on Sacred Scripture, which presents homosexual acts as acts of grave depravity,140 tradition has always declared that "homosexual acts are intrinsically disordered."141 They are contrary to the natural law. They close the sexual act to the gift of life. They do not proceed from a genuine affective and sexual complementarity. Under no circumstances can they be approved.

**2358 **The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. This inclination, which is objectively disordered, constitutes for most of them a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God’s will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord’s Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition.

**2359 **Homosexual persons are called to chastity. By the virtues of self-mastery that teach them inner freedom, at times by the support of disinterested friendship, by prayer and sacramental grace, they can and should gradually and resolutely approach Christian perfection.

 

[kyle91]

It is typical for animals to eat their own young when they’re stressed, there are animals in which the male takes care of gestational duties, there are many species in which males fight in order to maintain harems of females, and so on, so let’s not even go there for an example. There is very little that cannot be found in the rest of the animal kingdom.

Secondly, no matter what your temptation is, no matter what your sin is, God isn’t going to hate you. God saw how we had fallen into sin, not knowing the difference between right and left, and God loved us, and that is why the Son of God became a man. So do not let anyone tell you that God does not love you or understand everything about you, whether difficult or easy.

Having said that, we cannot feel that just because we have feelings that occur in nature and in other people that we can use those feelings as a moral compass. Think about that. Without feelings, would there be adultery? Does doing the right thing always feel good when you’re trying to decide whether or not you want to do it? No, it’s sometimes easy, but sometimes doing the right thing feels very counter to our inclinations.

This is what the Catechism teaches about homosexuality within the context of chastity. It’s from the chapter on the 6th commandment. Consider what it has to say:

Chastity and homosexuality

**2357 **Homosexuality refers to relations between men or between women who experience an exclusive or predominant sexual attraction toward persons of the same sex. It has taken a great variety of forms through the centuries and in different cultures. Its psychological genesis remains largely unexplained. Basing itself on Sacred Scripture, which presents homosexual acts as acts of grave depravity,140 tradition has always declared that "homosexual acts are intrinsically disordered."141 They are contrary to the natural law. They close the sexual act to the gift of life. They do not proceed from a genuine affective and sexual complementarity. Under no circumstances can they be approved.

**2358 **The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. This inclination, which is objectively disordered, constitutes for most of them a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God’s will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord’s Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition.

**2359 **Homosexual persons are called to chastity. By the virtues of self-mastery that teach them inner freedom, at times by the support of disinterested friendship, by prayer and sacramental grace, they can and should gradually and resolutely approach Christian perfection.

I had heard this before, its just that I don´t get it, I mean eating a child is clearly wrong, because you´re affecting someone else, adultery is the same thing, but homosexuality only affects those who willingly consent, why should this be wrong? Another thing I don´t understand is why di Jesus never talk about it. I just feel so sad that I´m going to have to be alone for the rest of my life

 

[Em_in_FL]

I had heard this before, its just that I don´t get it, I mean eating a child is clearly wrong, because you´re affecting someone else, adultery is the same thing, but homosexuality only affects those who willingly consent, why should this be wrong? Another thing I don´t understand is why di Jesus never talk about it. I just feel so sad that I´m going to have to be alone for the rest of my life

Because sex is designed (by God) to be both unitive and procreative. You can’t separate those two aspects. He gets a say in “how sex should be done” because it involves the CREATION of eternal SOULS…
God did say “Be fruitful and multiply”…

 

[Joe_5859]

I had heard this before, its just that I don´t get it, I mean eating a child is clearly wrong, because you´re affecting someone else, adultery is the same thing, but homosexuality only affects those who willingly consent, why should this be wrong? Another thing I don´t understand is why di Jesus never talk about it. I just feel so sad that I´m going to have to be alone for the rest of my life

All sin has both personal and social consequences, even if it is committed in privacy. That’s just the nature of being all part of one human family. What effects one part effects the rest.

Indeed, if this were not true, then we could not benefit from Jesus’s death and Resurrection. This intimate union of the human family is what makes it possible for us all to be raised in Christ.

It’s not always easy to see the broader consequences of our personal sins, but they are there.

Let’s look at another example see what I’m getting at: the sin of masturbation. Someone can do it in the privacy of their own home. No one else appears to be immediately impacted by it. So what’s the harm?

Well, I know a lot of guys who can tell you first hand the damage it does. It trains a guy to view women as objects of gratification rather than people to be loved. That’s going to color all their interactions with women. Everyone always asks why so many guys are such selfish jerks. Well, there’s a big part of it right there.

This has implications all throughout the person’s life. It makes it more difficult for the guy to bond with his wife and be selfless. And so on and so forth.

Even personal, private sin has social consequences.

We cannot go against God’s plan and expect there to be no consequences, even if we cannot see it right away.

I won’t pretend to tell you that it’s easy to do. You have a heavy cross to carry. We all have our crosses. But we cannot lighten our load by pretending the cross is no cross at all. It might seem freeing at first, but it is not going to lead to genuine joy and fulfillment. That can only come from God and from doing His Will.

You are in my prayers. Please pray for me, too.

 

[gxensen]

Just because it’s natural does not mean that it’s okay.

I mean, masturbation is a very natural thing, and it has many health benefits, but we must refrain from committing such act because it is a sin of lust…etc…

So, even if in the future scientists find a “gay gene,” or some other evidence that having same-sex attraction is natural, that will not all of sudden make it “okay.”

Anyway, it is wrong because it is an act of lust and closes us off to what sex is for: procreation under the blessing of marriage, between a male and a female; what God intended sex to be for.

Now, you have to keep in mind that existing as a person who has same-sex attraction is not a sin. The problem is when you act on your inclinations.

I’ll send you a message, if you like…I’ve been researching the subject quite extensively, in the past couple months (Homosexuality and Catholicism)

I’ll keep you in my prayers.

 

[EasterJoy]

I had heard this before, its just that I don´t get it, I mean eating a child is clearly wrong, because you´re affecting someone else, adultery is the same thing, but homosexuality only affects those who willingly consent, why should this be wrong? Another thing I don´t understand is why di Jesus never talk about it. I just feel so sad that I´m going to have to be alone for the rest of my life

Do you think you’re going to have to be alone? No. You’re just not going to be having sex with another man. There is a big difference. If not having a sex life were to automatically mean you are “alone,” then you are sharing the lot of Our Lord and Our Lady, and many others who do not or cannot marry. You’re also sharing the lot of married people whose spouses cannot have sex.

When you say that homosexual acts only affect those who willingly consent to engage in them, you’re assuming your body is your own. This is not true. Your body belongs to God. Your whole self belongs to God, and is meant to be used in obedience to how God made the human body to function.

Think about this: your mind also belongs to God. Does it not matter what you do with your mind, even though no one can see your thoughts? Can you think any thought you want and yet believe you harm no one? Can you and another person use any kinds of words you want with each other, no matter how degrading, as long as you two consent? Even if you were to harm only yourself, do you believe this is of no concern to God? To the Body of Christ, of which you are a member? So whether or not we hand our bodies or our minds over to lust and passions that are not in the service of God makes a great deal of difference, as much as we try to use human “wisdom” to rationalize otherwise.

Consider this, too: Some people have a great deal of trouble containing their tempers, because of hormones and the temperament that nature has given them. Yet this same combination of hormone and temperament gives them some of their most unique gifts, too. They may have gifts of leadership that people with mild temperaments to not have. That does not excuse the fiery-tempered from seeking self-mastery over their temperaments, but it also does not mean that the way their personalities are some kind of “mistake” that serves no purpose. Who knows? Some of your greatest gifts may have the same biological basis as your attraction for men or your lack of attraction for the opposite sex. So let’s not think your temptation is a trial and nothing more. It is possible, but it also possible that you have been given a difficult gift that is nevertheless a great gift. Even the necessity that you remain unmarried may be a great gift, to you and others. You don’t know. All you know is that self-mastery in chastity forbids the use of your body that you propose, even for the purpose of companionship. That does not forbid companionship, though. Do not give up on that. Do try to get over the prevailing falsehood that companionship without sex is inferior to companionship that has it. While sex is an integral part of the companionship between spouses who may become parents, it is not part of every great relationship of companionship that there can be. That is a lie, and belief in that lie keeps many people from living chaste lives, including many misguided Christians.

Hang in there, OK?

 

[Edward_H]

Plainly, it’s not an act of love.

Love is pursuing someone’s greatest good. Practicing homosexuality is an act of mutual selfishness.

A better, more revealing, question is why are there so many redundant threads on this subject? Seems a few people want a world built to their making and will complain and whine as if it will change some thing.

 

[gxensen]

Do try to get over the prevailing falsehood that companionship without sex is inferior to companionship that has it. While sex is an integral part of the companionship between spouses who may become parents,** it is not part of every great relationship of companionship that there can be**. That is a lie, and belief in that lie keeps many people from living chaste lives, including many misguided Christians.

Hang in there, OK?

Exactly

It’s one of the mud balls of disinformation which the gay agenda (and to an extent liberalism too) tends to throw at us, that “sex is needed in a healthy romantic relationship.”

 

[DebChris]

St. Paul refers to the sexual sins as sins against the self.
You are right in that the person you hurt by sinning sexually is yourself.
The two great commandments are “Love God with all your heart, mind, and strength,” and “Love your neighbor as yourself.”
In order to love your neighbor, you must first love yourself. If you love yourself, you will not do something that will bring harm to your self, to your body.
Your body is also the temple of the Holy Spirit. So sexual acts outside the conjugal act between man and woman within the bonds of marriage is sacrilege against the Holy Spirit.
God is a loving God. When we do sin, and bring that sin to the Sacrament of Reconciliation, it can be forgiven.
The inclination to sin will not keep a person from heaven. Persisting in the sin is another story.
Work toward mastery over the sin. Depend on God, through whom all things are possible, to help you. We are the branches on the vine which is Christ.

 

[bzkoss236]

I’ve seen really strong companionship between many individuals and some with animals, but surely you wouldn’t see that person having sex with an animal (not that it doesn’t happen, but a healthy companionship would not). And if that animal is hurt, the human companion can feel devastated. And the opposite can be true too, if the human is hurt, the animal can appear to be devastated too.

Also, what about friends? Would you not have friends? Not having a sexual relationship doesn’t mean you’ll be alone. Just look at Jesus himself. He had many friends, but he didn’t have a sexual relationship with anyone. Would you say that Jesus was alone?

And if you still say that it isn’t fair, it is.

Any sex outside of marriage is wrong. And because of the function that marriage fulfills, a union of two men or two women cannot be a marriage, and any sex had would be outside of marriage, and thus sinful. You wouldn’t hear a zoologist complain that it isn’t fair he can’t become a medical doctor. He has had biology. I’m sure he understands the human body, and humans are mammals, right? But a zoologist isn’t a medical doctor, and people know that. They aren’t the same thing, and you can’t pretend that they are.

I hope this helps.

Also, having a same-sex attraction, while disordered, is not evil in itself. So you won’t go to hell just for being attracted to the same gender. It is in the thoughts and actions where the sin can arise. If you have sexual thoughts or act out sexually, that would be sinful. But the same can be said for a heterosexual. It’s not sinful that they are attracted to the opposite sex, but if they have sexual thoughts about or act out sexually with someone they are not married to, it is sinful.

 

[centurionguard]

All I can say is that I’m definitively not homophobic or am I homosexual.
However; it would seem the moment I declare I’m against homosexual sexual practices I’m already labelled as homophobic. What gives?

 

[Iron_Donkey]

I had heard this before, its just that I don´t get it, I mean eating a child is clearly wrong, because you´re affecting someone else, adultery is the same thing, but homosexuality only affects those who willingly consent, why should this be wrong? Another thing I don´t understand is why di Jesus never talk about it. I just feel so sad that I´m going to have to be alone for the rest of my life

There have been many good answers to the general question, but just to quickly address these two points:

1. Jesus never talked about it explicitly because there wasn’t much need for Him to. Everyone knew it was wrong. Paul did explicitly address the issue, but even then he didn’t dwell on it just because there wasn’t much point. It’d have been like a spending ages talking about why murder is wrong. We can’t expect Jesus to have, in scripture, addressed every issue that would ever come up in our society explicitly. He didn’t explicitly address human cloning either. But from what we know He did say, and from what His apostles said, and from what His Church has always taught, we can know His will.
2. Whether it only effects those involved or not (and I would argue not) doesn’t really matter. It would be wrong for a homeless person with no family or friends to commit suicide as well, even if no one else in the world would notice - no effect on anyone else. But all actions do affect at least ourselves, and actions which take just us further from how we are supposed to be (even if they affect no one else, which is unlikely) are wrong. No man is an island, sort of thing.

 

[Balcerhouse]

I was told by my RCIA teacher that we as humans are always married. We’re in one of three states. We’re married to God, the Church, or a person that God has chosen for us to be married to. As single people we’re married to God and are required to stay true to that commitment.
You said that you love God and I don’t doubt that because this has caused such a difficulty for you. The bible says that love doesn’t “vaunt” itself. It’s not self-assertive in other words. Think of it this way, the bible also says that God wont put on us anymore than He knows we can handle. You really have what I imagine will be a hard road ahead. But God has faith in you that you can proceed and come out a great success. I’ll be praying for you.

 

[bzkoss236]

All I can say is that I’m definitively not homophobic or am I homosexual.
However; it would seem the moment I declare I’m against homosexual sexual practices I’m already labelled as homophobic. What gives?

I know, right?!

Homophobia, by definition, would be a fear of homosexuals. While there may be some, I seriously doubt that most people who are against homosexual acts are actually scared of homosexuals.

 

[Carlan]

I´m catholic, I go to church every sunday, and I pray with my family everyday. I really believe in God. But the thing is, that I feel attracted to men, and in the bible it says it´s wrong. I´ve researched and found that there are animals that have homosexual orientation, so this means it is something that hapens in nature, why then would it be wrong if I act on my feelings, will God hate me if I do? Will I go to hell? I really don´t want to go to hell, but I don´t understand why is it that wrong, if I would not be harming anyone else by being with another man

Dear Kyle, so much heart felt council for you here , I would just like to offer again what the teaching authority of the Church says.

Chastity and homosexuality.

2357 Homosexuality refers to relations between men or between women who experience an exclusive or predominant sexual attraction toward persons of the same sex. It has taken a great variety of forms through the centuries and in different cultures. Its psychological genesis remains largely unexplained. Basing itself on Sacred Scripture, which presents homosexual acts as acts of grave depravity,140 tradition has always declared that "homosexual acts are intrinsically disordered."141 They are contrary to the natural law. They close the sexual act to the gift of life. They do not proceed from a genuine affective and sexual complementarity. Under no circumstances can they be approved.

2358 The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. This inclination, which is objectively disordered, constitutes for most of them a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God’s will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord’s Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition.

2359 Homosexual persons are called to chastity. By the virtues of self-mastery that teach them inner freedom, at times by the support of disinterested friendship, by prayer and sacramental grace, they can and should gradually and resolutely approach Christian perfection.

Always remember in your struggle with temptation,

" I can do all things in Him who strengthens me"
Peace,Carlan

 

[Spoken4]

I’m an addict. I’ve been away from my drug of choice (cocaine) for 24 years now. So I understand what a “strong attraction” can be, and how hard it can be to stay away from it if it’s in front of me all the time.

That was why I had to distance myself from the people I hung with, who were into cocaine in any form. At first, I thought that if I just stayed clear of those certain people, I would be okay. But it wasn’t that simple! See, I still went to night clubs, and I soon found other sources of cocaine at that night club. Soon enough, I was using again-- but now I had a different source. I realized that I had done away with a tiny part of my problem, but the main issue was still there. I was using coke. So, I quit going to night clubs because I wanted to stay clean of cocaine. I kept my drinking at home. But before long, I realized that my problem was more tightly woven than that! I had associated drinking with using coke, and after a couple of cocktails, I found myself longing for a couple of lines.

No, it was going to take more than “just not using coke” to really care for this issue. I had to make a lifestyle change! For me, alcohol wasn’t the problem-- it was the cocaine. But there were many triggers (certain people, certain kinds of places, alcohol) that would have led me right back to that addiction!

Am I still an addict? Yes, I am. Addiction is not really “curable”, but it can be managed. For me, it was about finding positive and healthy friends; it was about avoiding places and situations that could lead to falling back into the trap.

Having an addiction is not a sin. Even drinking alcohol in moderation is not a sin. By ‘moderation’, I mean not to the point of causing drunkenness or leading to behaviors that are sinful or dangerous to others or yourself.

By the same token, having an attraction to others of the same sex is not in itself a sin. We don’t have full control over what we “like”. But we DO have control over our behaviors! A person who is not an alcoholic can then drink a glass of wine and enjoy it without sin because they can stop with that one glass, before the alcohol destroys their inhibitions. The alcoholic or addict must stay away from the “trigger”, even if s/he thinks that the consequences can be avoided. You don’t know when the trigger will activate. A person with homosexual tendencies can socialize (such as playing sports or praying) with members of their same sex, but cannot “date” them. Thus, one-on-one interaction with the same sex should best be avoided until one is strong enough to avoid the trigger in the first place.

A priest may find a certain female member of the congregation to be quite lovely and attractive, but he’s taken a vow of chastity and celibacy, and he cannot approach her and ask her on a date. He’s still a male and he may still have certain “urges”, but that priest must still pray and remain celibate. If he allows his mind to wander and begins having lustful or impure thoughts about that pretty girl, he must still confess them-- just like the rest of us.

 

[spes_salvi]

Hi kyle. I also have a same-sex attraction. I can understand the weight of the cross we bear. Sometimes, I still feel upset about it, but I also know that my love for God should prevail so that I must avoid displeasing him by committing sin. At times like these, I pray to God to give me the strength and joy to keep going in life. Our popular culture often hails sex as the greatest source of happiness, but this isn’t true. There’s more to life than sex. Those who engage in sex in sinful ways and disregarding its true meaning may experience momentary pleasure, but end up hurting themselves and others and with a huge void which no amount of pleasure could fill.

But first, it’s important to address your objections.

#1 Animals demonstrate homosexual behavior. Therefore, homosexual behavior is natural and is not wrong.

Natural can mean two things: 1) something that exists in nature and 2) somethng that works to promote the good and normal order of things; to work well according to one’s “nature”. These two meanings should not be equated. Stuff that exist in nature do not necessarily mean it’s good, normal, or according to one’s nature. Illness, for example, exists in nature. Humans and animals suffer from disease. But we know that illness is contrary to one’s normal functions and health. It is not “natural” in this sense, because something is not supposed to be. Something is wrong.

In a similar manner, homosexuality doesn’t automatically become right because it exists in nature or observed in animals. In the final analysis, its morality is judged according to the right natural order of things. First, we note the function of one’s reproductive organs. The male and female organs are meant to be complementary and to function for procreation. Second, the male and female person are also complementary in terms of other aspects (their psyche, personality etc.) as if they are designed in marriage to build up one another in his/her own respect. Homosexuality runs contrary to this natural order and complementarity.

The existence of “wrong” things in nature is explained by our doctrine of Original sin. Because of the fall of mankind, nature does not work as perfectly as it was first ordained to be. We experience death and illness. People experience tendencies and attraction that lead us to commit sin (attraction to women who is not your wife; attraction to persons of the same-sex, to name a few). This attraction, although disordered, doesn’t constitute sin by itself unless one consents to it.

This is part of the struggle that God expects all of us to bear for him. But we have with us the hope that he gives us enough help and grace to avoid sin, fight temptation, and to strive to live in holiness. Even if we fall out of weakness, God gives us a fresh chance to continue fighting by forgiving us in Confession.

 

[Carlan]

Hi kyle. I also have a same-sex attraction. I can understand the weight of the cross we bear. Sometimes, I still feel upset about it, but I also know that my love for God should prevail so that I must avoid displeasing him by committing sin. At times like these, I pray to God to give me the strength and joy to keep going in life. Our popular culture often hails sex as the greatest source of happiness, but this isn’t true. There’s more to life than sex. Those who engage in sex in sinful ways and disregarding its true meaning may experience momentary pleasure, but end up hurting themselves and others and with a huge void which no amount of pleasure could fill.

But first, it’s important to address your objections.

#1 Animals demonstrate homosexual behavior. Therefore, homosexual behavior is natural and is not wrong.

Natural can mean two things: 1) something that exists in nature and 2) somethng that works to promote the good and normal order of things; to work well according to one’s “nature”. These two meanings should not be equated. Stuff that exist in nature do not necessarily mean it’s good, normal, or according to one’s nature. Illness, for example, exists in nature. Humans and animals suffer from disease. But we know that illness is contrary to one’s normal functions and health. It is not “natural” in this sense, because something is not supposed to be. Something is wrong.

In a similar manner, homosexuality doesn’t automatically become right because it exists in nature or observed in animals. In the final analysis, its morality is judged according to the right natural order of things. First, we note the function of one’s reproductive organs. The male and female organs are meant to be complementary and to function for procreation. Second, the male and female person are also complementary in terms of other aspects (their psyche, personality etc.) as if they are designed in marriage to build up one another in his/her own respect. Homosexuality runs contrary to this natural order and complementarity.

The existence of “wrong” things in nature is explained by our doctrine of Original sin. Because of the fall of mankind, nature does not work as perfectly as it was first ordained to be. We experience death and illness. People experience tendencies and attraction that lead us to commit sin (attraction to women who is not your wife; attraction to persons of the same-sex, to name a few). This attraction, although disordered, doesn’t constitute sin by itself unless one consents to it.

This is part of the struggle that God expects all of us to bear for him. But we have with us the hope that he gives us enough help and grace to avoid sin, fight temptation, and to strive to live in holiness. Even if we fall out of weakness, God gives us a fresh chance to continue fighting by forgiving us in Confession.

Peace, Carlan