No, I don’t think she believes that. I did clarify that with her, but she basically replied “but still”
I think basically it’s the “a loving master to a slave is still a master”…not that the husband is a master…but the ‘head’ and the wife being the heart (what does that even mean lol, it always sounds like something someone says to make the wife feel important…like “here’s a participation trophy”? Anyway i digress). I can kind of relate to her, so I can feel the frustration radiating off her. I didn’t know she would be so affected…she’s so little!
I think the main thing for her to be given to understand is that this dynamic is in place every time you have a committee of two or even when a larger group has to make a decision. In the end, someone has to decide. No matter who you are, you have to submit to someone. When someone has to submit to you, you are not in a place to “lord it over them.” You are in a place of responsibility. If anyone ought to be in the position to say, “hey, who elected me for that?!?” it is probably the men.
The thing to impress upon her is that for Christians “the dynamic” is in Mark 10:35-25
*Then James and John, the sons of Zebedee, came to him and said to him, “Teacher, we want you to do for us whatever we ask of you.” He replied, “What do you wish [me] to do for you?” They answered him, “Grant that in your glory we may sit one at your right and the other at your left.” Jesus said to them, “You do not know what you are asking. Can you drink the cup that I drink or be baptized with the baptism with which I am baptized?” They said to him, “We can.” Jesus said to them, “The cup that I drink, you will drink, and with the baptism with which I am baptized, you will be baptized; but to sit at my right or at my left is not mine to give but is for those for whom it has been prepared.” When the ten heard this, they became indignant at James and John.
Jesus summoned them and said to them,p “You know that those who are recognized as rulers over the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones make their authority over them felt. But it shall not be so among you. Rather, whoever wishes to be great among you will be your servant; whoever wishes to be first among you will be the slave of all. For the Son of Man did not come to be served but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many.” *
St. John is identified as the “beloved disciple” in this passage:
When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple there whom he loved, he said to his mother, “Woman, behold, your son.” Then he said to the disciple, “Behold, your mother.” And from that hour the disciple took her into his home. John 19:26-27
Other than John, who was given a particular role from his place risking his life at the foot of the Cross, every other one of the Twelve–every one of those looking for a place to be important–was martyred. Every one of them endured a cruel death because of the place of “leadership” they had accepted.
Every Christian has to practice submission. Even the Christian given a place of authority has to submit to the demands of that position of authority. The higher one goes, the more one will be expected to make an account of their stewardship of the responsibility he or she received.
I do not know why the husband was given the position of leadership in a Christian home. Perhaps it is because the male who acts according to the natural order will be dominating. Christ intends that there be no domination in a Christian home, so there is a wisdom in giving the male the place that will elevate the natural tendency to dominate into a supernatural and Christlike leadership of self-sacrificial service.
Whatever the case, Christian leadership is nothing to resent. It is a position to be accepted with a certain amount of trepidation. A woman ought to choose her husband as someone who will rule their domestic church together as a king and queen who both submit themselves to Christ as the ultimate Emperor of their lives. If you read Ephesians 5, that is clearly what is meant by the submission of a Christian wife to her husband.
[This is what I mean by being able to offer an account:
*Then Peter said, “Lord, is this parable meant for us or for everyone?” And the Lord replied, “Who, then, is the faithful and prudent steward whom the master will put in charge of his servants to distribute [the] food allowance at the proper time? Blessed is that servant whom his master on arrival finds doing so. Truly, I say to you, he will put him in charge of all his property.
But if that servant says to himself, ‘My master is delayed in coming,’* and begins to beat the menservants and the maidservants, to eat and drink and get drunk, then that servant’s master will come on an unexpected day and at an unknown hour and will punish him severely and assign him a place with the unfaithful…Much will be required of the person entrusted with much, and still more will be demanded of the person entrusted with more. Luke 12:41-46, 48b]
I do feel annoyed bc it always has been up to me to teach her stuff. About religion, school, etc. I’m trying to figure things out for myself!
I have the easy part in this whole thing. 
