Would you move to another country for someone?

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As the title says, would you move to another country for someone? What are some of the things you would consider in making that decision? Thank you.
 
I’m assuming you mean for the purpose of marriage? I moved to Brooklyn to be with my husband, and a lot of people would say that’s like another country compared to Pennsylvania. Moving to an actual other country would be such a huge decision. Here’s why I moved to be with him instead of the other way around:
  • Not only does he make more money at his career, but mine is much more mobile than his.
  • Both of us were living very close to our parents, but his are much older, so it made more sense for us to be nearer to his family.
  • He already owned a house with a very reasonable mortgage which would basically be impossible to obtain in today’s market. I was living in an apartment.
I would not have made this move if I did not feel in the core of my being that God wanted us to be together. Moving to another country, however, there’s lots more than this to consider. Are you very close to your family? How often would you expect to see them if you moved away? (I’m a 2 hour drive from my family and see them may be once a month, sometimes every 2 months.) How well do you know this person? I don’t know if I could make that move if I did not have much time to develop a very solid in-person relationship with the person. It really is a big risk to do this. I’ve heard of people doing this and it working out wonderfully, and I’ve heard of people doing this and it blowing up in their face. One thing that was a slight struggle for me was basically finding my own way here. I left my parish community, my friends, hobbies, shopping places, job, etc… to be with him. For a while it kind of felt like I was his guest just following him around.
 
It really doesn’t matter what I would do, does it?

In addition to all of the general prerequisites such as the person being a Catholic, us getting along, etc, I think some things to consider in such a decision are:
  • Do I have the temperament for living in a foreign culture with little or no family support
  • Do I have the temperament to handle unfamiliar every day situations: transportation, laws, currency, shopping, etc, in a foreign country
  • Do I have any food issues (i.e. special diet) that would be difficult in this country or health issues (how does health care work in this country)
  • Is this long term or short term
  • Do I speak the language or does the other person speak my language fluently
  • Is this a culture I can live in
  • Is this a political climate I can live in
  • Is this a geographic climate (i.e. temperature, weather, days of sunshine) I can live in
  • What are my employment options and laws
  • How will I make friends
  • What are the ramifications for children (citizenship, etc)
  • Is this person willing to reverse course and live in my country if I am unhappy? Can they emmigrate and get a job easiliy?
That is for starters
 
Would it change things if I said the country in question is Canada?
 
Would it change things if I said the country in question is Canada?
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I moved there for my parents!

And I survived… kind of.😛

However, I would change my forum name from “allseasons” to “wintertires” if you do move:D
 
AllSeasons, since you don’t list your location on your profile, I don’t know from where you’d be moving. But, if you’re an American I imagine there would practically be no culture shock if you moved to any of the British Canadian territories, so that would probably make the transition fairly easy.

1ke posed some very good questions you need to ask yourself. Speaking for myself, it would depend mainly on two things:

How long I have been going out with the person (I wouldn’t move for someone I had only been seeing for 4 months!)

How long we would be living in the country and whether or not there were plans to return to the US. For something like a temporary job assignment (2-3 years), I would look forward to the experience of living in another country. But, eventually I would want to move back home.
triumphguy said:
However, I would change my forum name from “allseasons” to “wintertires” if you do move:D
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😃
 
AllSeasons said:
As the title says, would you move to another country for someone? What are some of the things you would consider in making that decision? Thank you.
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Countries mean nothing, really. The pope isn’t a citizen of the USA, the UK or Canada or Ireland or any other English speaking country, and he seems to get by just fine. Only persons matter. All else falls away and does not last. God is a person (three, actually). And our fellow humans are persons.

Just don’t move to any location where you and your family will be in danger, unless, for some reason, you are willing to accept that risk.
 
If the someone was my husband, then yes, if he insisted.
If the somewhere was somewhere I’d move by myself, then all the better to know someone there.
If the someone was not at least a fiance, then not unless it was somewhere I’d manage to want to live in by myself, because I’d not want a load of resentment if that is exactly what happened. It wouldn’t have to be somewhere I’d have thought to move by myself, just somewhere I’d be OK with finding myself without a significant other.

In other words, this is very personal decision. Also, don’t co-habitate.
 
I can’t imagine moving anywhere for a relationship unless I was already considering relocation there.

Relationships, these days, are so unstable that one stands an excellent chance of ending up alone in a place one never wanted to be. YMMV.

ICXC NIKA
 
Wait, I thought that Canada is the 51st state!?
Just kidding 😃 But to us foreigners differences between the US and Canada are not exactly visible.

I’ve been an expat for 10 years and am used to culture shocks so my take on things is a bit different. I say go for it, it’s not like moving to a completely different culture at the other side of the globe where you would have to adjust to everything basically. Would this move be permanent? How difficult would it be to get home and how often could you visit? Would your family and friends be able to visit you often? These are some of the things to consider.
 
If I didn’t have kids and grand kids here, I’d move to Italy in a heartbeat!
 
Only persons matter[/COLOR:
. All else falls away and does not last. God is a person (three, actually). And our fellow humans are persons.

Just don’t move to any location where you and your family will be in danger, unless, for some reason, you are willing to accept that risk.
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Only if it were for my husband after marriage. (not before) Together with Christ anything is possible. As it says above, persons matter. Luckily the C Church is universal. It would be difficult for me to move somewhere where my faith was not tolerated.
 
AllSeasons said:
As the title says, would you move to another country for someone? What are some of the things you would consider in making that decision? Thank you.
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I would never do this unless I was married to the person. And it would be a joint decision, and if either of us said, “No,” then the answer would have to be “No.”

Factors would be how far we would be from family, how much money he was going to make, how easy it would be to travel to family, what the climate is, what the cost of living is, what language is spoken, what is the culture like. Is it a good fit for us and for how long will we be there? We are beyond the stage of having small children but if we had young kids, their needs would probably rate the highest on the scale of considerations.
 
I have moved often, and I have lived in several countries. I would move for my husband without question. We moved to another country the day after our wedding. There are some places we would both prefer to the one where we live now, but moving six children is expensive.

For me, places are not important when compared to my family, especially my husband.
 
I would move for a fiance so we can plan the wedding and get married. I feel like if the relationship is serious and leading to marriage, then of course, it’s no question.
 
It would all depend on the situation for me. My friend did but the situation was right for her. She had spent an entire academic year in Ireland when she was an undergrad, met a wonderful man three months before she came home, and they just “clicked.” It was tough for her to leave him and they spent an entire year apart while she finished her degree here in America. She then got an internship back in Ireland and I think they got engaged about 6 months after she moved back. They’ve been happily married for 3 years and she is really happy there. And, I should mention, they’re both really strong Catholics.

I really doubt I could personally do it because I am really close to my family, but I don’t think anyone can make such a judgment call unless they’re in that situation.
 
I certainly would NOT move to a foriegn country for someone else, there is no guarantee it will work out.
 
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