Would you want emergency contraception if you or yours were raped?

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homeschoolhelen:
This subject is a little close to my heart for a variety of reasons. I myself am a rape victim, but I didn’t get pregnant. I was afraid I was and was very naive about everything when it happened. I was 18 when it happened and 23 when I finally told my family about it. I remember waiting and waiting to see if I was pregnant and if I was, I was going to just be forced to tell my family what happened sooner. The thought of abortion, never crossed my mind. Honestly. Because I was raised pro-life no matter what the circumstances. This rape put my life into a tale spin of bad decisions etc., but again I ended up not being pregnant.

Looking back, I am 39, married with four children, I realize that everyone that has commented is on a journey to understand this situation. In the end there is one common denominator. God. Life comes from God. Contraception, morning after pills, abortions are all ways to stop life from God. God doesn’t make mistakes. We do. We feel we can say no to God. Every single child that is sent here has a reason in this life. Maybe it is to be adopted by a family that can’t have their own children. No matter what, babies conceived by violence deserve to be born and loved, they are blessings just the same, but maybe for someone else or maybe for the mother carrying that baby!
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God bless you for overcoming and sharing your conviction.

I am sure he is smiling at you and your family now.
 
Island Oak:
I know this is starting to veer off the original thread topic–but where does the issue of consent ever enter into a discussion of rape? At what point after being either abducted, beaten, tied up, pinned down or threatened with a weapon do you have an option not to “submit?” At the core of its commonly understood meaning, rape involves sexual contact that is unwanted and forced upon one by another without consent.
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Has it entered the discussion? I agree with you. By definition, it requires a lack of consent.
 
Well, now the various links have me confused.

What I thought I heard:

Normal church teaching on contraception does not apply because a RAPE can never be either properly unitive or procreative (note I said properly).

Therefore a spermicide that had no effect on a zygote would be considered acceptable.

It sounded like the hefty dose BC pill would be OK, IF a blood test showed the woman had NOT ovulated within the last 72 hours.

However, the more recent link seems to indicate that this method might actually CAUSE ovulation, which could then lead to a pregnancy that would abort since the uterine lining would be unsuitable. Did I understand this correctly? This would cause both pregnancy AND abortion!

I wonder if a dose of spermicide and a heavy dose of something like Sudafed (to halt production of fertile mucus) would be effective?
 
Absolutely not.

I would never intentionally injur or kill an unborn child regardless of the circumstances that surrounded the conception of the child.

I would either carry the child to term and raise the chid myself (if my husband were amenable) or I would carry the child to term and place them in an adoptive home.

I would never even think about killing the child.
 
Your adding more to the trama if you use contraception. Especially, if a life was beginning.

If you found out you were pregnant from the rape. The baby will be the key to your healing.
Good always come out from bad events(especially when you work with God). The child will be the good that came out of the evil of rape. So when you remember the depressing event, you’ll have the child (the bright side of the problem) to ease the emotional hurt. Losing the baby (purposely) will give you a sense of loss, and will only add to the tragedy and the emotional pain of the rape.

Keep this in mind: God works in mysterious ways and things happen for a reason.
 
Ask a woman who’s been raped about “submitting”. There’s no “submitting” involved.

Your body is being violated against your will and God doesn’t deem the rape victim to be at fault.
 
sorry crusader don’t see how a child conceived of such a violent act could be a key to healing, it would only add to the emotional and spiritual harm already done, to say other wise is to be very niave to say the least
 
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WhiteDove:
I was reading the other thread and was interested what you would choose if you were raped. If you’re a guy, what would you want for your wife or daughter???
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I would have the child and either give it up for adoption or keep it. I have seen too many success stories related to this issue to think that I could not bear, with the help of God, to get through this type of trauma. Often it is the positive nature of giving life that has helped to heal these women.

The only thing that is hard for me, in what you have presented with this poll, is if my daughter were raped what would I do. My first reaction to this would be to take her to a hospital and have whatever needs to be done to ensure that she does not conceive. That is, of course, if we are able to promptly get her treatment. I cannot even bear the thought of this scenario inflicted on my own child. Forgive me if my answer conflicts with our beliefs.
 
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cainem:
sorry crusader don’t see how a child conceived of such a violent act could be a key to healing, it would only add to the emotional and spiritual harm already done, to say other wise is to be very niave to say the least
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You need to go to web-sites and read the testimonies of women who have given birth after rape and their own personal stories. I would have thought the same as you until I saw for myself how these people really feel about these children. They themselves will tell you that giving life gave them hope and healed them.

Remember the baby concieved through rape is not the criminal. A rapist does not receive the “death penalty” for this crime. Why should an innocent child?

btw–Many people walking the earth today were conceived in this manner. Don’t you think you do them an injustice to assume that they were not worthy of life because of their unfortunate conception? I am sure that they do not want to think they they were any burden or heartache for their mother. It is the “rape” that harms the woman. Not the innocent child caught up in the trauma.
 
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cove:
You need to go to web-sites and read the testimonies of women who have given birth after rape and their own personal stories. I would have thought the same as you until I saw for myself how these people really feel about these children. They themselves will tell you that giving life gave them hope and healed them.
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This can be true, and when it occurs it is a powerful testimony to life and courage. However, I agree that Crusader’s comments were simplistic and naive. I worked for five years at a shelter where quite a few of the women had children from rape. Yes, they rejected abortion when it would have been a much more economic and socially acceptable choice, and they did so for strong moral reasons.

Many attested that having a child helped them move on from the trauma of the rape. However, none of them would deny that the choice was excruciating, and that seeing daily the features of their rapist in their child’s face was a haunting trial. When those children were being obstinate, naughty or exasperating, it could be extremely hard for the mothers to love them because of how they were conceived.

While affirming life, we need to be careful not to blithely refer to children of rape as the “bright side of the problem.” The children are instrinsically good and innocent of crime, of course. But for many of the mothers I knew, it was a long time before they could see those children as a “bright side.” It wasn’t at all obvious, as some of the posts seem to imply.
 
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maendem:
This can be true, and when it occurs it is a powerful testimony to life and courage. However, I agree that Crusader’s comments were simplistic and naive. I worked for five years at a shelter where quite a few of the women had children from rape. Yes, they rejected abortion when it would have been a much more economic and socially acceptable choice, and they did so for strong moral reasons.

Many attested that having a child helped them move on from the trauma of the rape. However, none of them would deny that the choice was excruciating, and that seeing daily the features of their rapist in their child’s face was a haunting trial. When those children were being obstinate, naughty or exasperating, it could be extremely hard for the mothers to love them because of how they were conceived.

While affirming life, we need to be careful not to blithely refer to children of rape as the “bright side of the problem.” The children are instrinsically good and innocent of crime, of course. But for many of the mothers I knew, it was a long time before they could see those children as a “bright side.” It wasn’t at all obvious, as some of the posts seem to imply.
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I saw a story once about a family who kept the child. I say family because this woman was married with children when she was raped and her husband and children also had to come to this very hard reality and acceptance. The woman was white and the child she had was obviously of mixed race. Could you imagine how easy it was for her to see her attacker in her child? This entire family was incredible. Her husband admitted that in the beginning he had wanted her to have an abortion. But, he was very much supportive of her decision to have the child. It was not easy for him but he came to so love this little girl that he accepted her as his own child.

Certainly we are all faced with daily trials and challenges especially where children are concerned. I do not for a moment think that these women and children are not faced with their own special daily trials. That is why it is so important for us to keep up the positive attitude and let them know we all understand and support them.
 
To the best of my knowledge, because the true rape victim is a true innocent, so long as conception has not occurred contraception but not abortion is a perfectly valid response to rape – otherwise it generates maddening philosophical contradictions.
 
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homeschoolhelen:
. Life comes from God… . Every single child that is sent here has a reason in this life. Maybe it is to be adopted by a family that can’t have their own children. No matter what, babies conceived by violence deserve to be born and loved, they are blessings just the same, but maybe for someone else or maybe for the mother carrying that baby!
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Absolutely agree, homeschoolhelen. My adopted son’s birthmom was 14 when he was born. I’m so glad she chose life for him, he’s a special blessing to all our family.
Everyone says “rapist” like that’s a concept totally foreign to all the rest of us. What if we substituted “sinner?” Everybody’s father is a sinner, yet we don’t get all excited about that and reject all children. I believe rapists are people (not always men) who were abused as children and remain a little insane, but surely that sin doesn’t run in families.
Adoption might be the best choice, but no one should feel guilty or worth less than others because their birth resulted from rape.
 
I would not want anyone in my family to use emergency birth control- it would risk a child being killed, when the person involved survived the rape.

I would suggest that in this situation that people pray- it’s that simple. Tell God that you are afraid and that you really do not want to have a Child because of what happened, but that you know that should you be pregnant, that you are carrying someone who, like the rest of us, is made in the image and likeness of God, and ask God for the strength to go on through a very difficult time.

Life begins at conception (i.e. fertilization) and from the moment of conception, that child is a human being made in the image and likeness of God. Who knows? Maybe with this attitude a person could find healing and a sense of peace about the whole thing.
 
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m134e5:
I would not want anyone in my family to use emergency birth control- it would risk a child being killed, when the person involved survived the rape.

I would suggest that in this situation that people pray- it’s that simple. Tell God that you are afraid and that you really do not want to have a Child because of what happened, but that you know that should you be pregnant, that you are carrying someone who, like the rest of us, is made in the image and likeness of God, and ask God for the strength to go on through a very difficult time.

Life begins at conception (i.e. fertilization) and from the moment of conception, that child is a human being made in the image and likeness of God. Who knows? Maybe with this attitude a person could find healing and a sense of peace about the whole thing.
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lets be realistic the rapists child would tear your family apart, most men i know would be so destroyed with anger and hatred of the rapist not sinner after all he has done more than steal a cookie, to love the child, and then if the wife was to try and raise the child she may very well end up single because of it, perhaps as we have to love the sinner would the rapist get visitation rights invites to childs birthday party etc.
 
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cainem:
lets be realistic the rapists child would tear your family apart, most men i know would be so destroyed with anger and hatred of the rapist not sinner after all he has done more than steal a cookie, to love the child, and then if the wife was to try and raise the child she may very well end up single because of it, perhaps as we have to love the sinner would the rapist get visitation rights invites to childs birthday party etc.
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Loving the sinner doesn’t mean we turn our brains into mush.
It means praying for his salvation, which we are enjoined to do for our enemies anyway.
Your point is correct that most men would have a hard time handling this, so adoption would be a better choice in that case.
I still maintain that rape is a sin like murder, theft (think the devastation done by Enron in people’s lives), and should not be in a category by itself.
 
m134e5 said:
I would not want anyone in my family to use emergency birth control- it would risk a child being killed, when the person involved survived the rape.

I would suggest that in this situation that people pray- it’s that simple. Tell God that you are afraid and that you really do not want to have a Child because of what happened, but that you know that should you be pregnant, that you are carrying someone who, like the rest of us, is made in the image and likeness of God, and ask God for the strength to go on through a very difficult time.

Life begins at conception (i.e. fertilization) and from the moment of conception, that child is a human being made in the image and likeness of God. Who knows? Maybe with this attitude a person could find healing and a sense of peace about the whole thing.
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Oh, sheesh! Come on! That’s ridiculous! 30 minutes after your 13 year old is viciously raped by a knife-wielding schizophrenic wild man, you’re not going to be telling the hospital staff, “HURRY! HURRY! FLUSH HER OUT! BEFORE THERE IS ANY REASONABLE RISK OF CONCEPTION!”

You’re going to make an absurd balance, in favor of the *ridiculously-small *risk that a sperm might have made it up into the Fallopian Tubes in 30 minutes, and force your child to wait and see if she is going to bear the baby of a screaming homocidal rapist???

Give me a break! Doing that, REALLY, would be sinful!!!
 
Does anyone know what the Church teaches about this “flushing”…how long does it take for conception to happen in a situation like this…to where flushing would constitute an abortion, and if it hasn’t happened yet, is it moral to “flush” the sperm/egg/whatever flushing flushes out?(please someone fill me in)

Sorry everyone, but I look to a moral authority(Christ speaking through his Church) to guide my life, not my own opinions…if I used my own opinions, I might as well reason that a partial birth abortion is just fine, because that is exactly the same murder as a partial birth abortion.

Do you think people who get abortions want the baby just because they weren’t raped. Its a fine line…and once you allow the destruction of one fetus, you might as well allow it all.
 
Also, BibleReader, it says in the BIBLE, “before I formed you in the womb, I knew you”

It doesn’t say, “Before I formed you in the womb, as long as you were not a child of a rapist, I knew you; so go ahead and be thrown in the trash if you were”
 
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