A Modesty Question For Women- Skirts

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Actually, the stinkiest city where I’ve ever spent time is Washington, DC.
There are a whole lot of young-ish people there who for whatever reason don’t think they need to do laundry or use deodorant.
My hobby for years used to be running around to see bands in various cities and one would often be standing in some club with a lot of other people within a foot of you…DC was always, always the smelliest place to see a show. I had to move to another part of the venue more than once.
 
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NevermoreLenore said:
Men are not shamed the way women are about their bodies or dress. If a man wears shorts…meh, bad judgment. If a woman has a skirt that touches the top of the knee or clothes that others decide are too clingy, it’s a complete and utter moral failing.
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This is not necessarily true. The difference is, when men dress immodestly, people will often think they are homosexual or dressing like a homosexual.

The “shaming” is simply different. Most straight young men (esp. back when I was in high school in the early 1990s) would never want to be called a gay based on what they were wearing.
 
Tis_Bearself said:
My hobby for years used to be running around to see bands in various cities and one would often be standing in some club with a lot of other people within a foot of you…DC was always, always the smelliest place to see a show. I had to move to another part of the venue more than once
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The 930 Club does smell like a foot. I saw the Pogues there, and while I was thrilled to see Shane MacGowans corpse stagger on stage…the venue did not smell like lavender.
 
scousekiwi said:
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NevermoreLenore:
Men are not shamed the way women are about their bodies or dress.
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The fact that this is true does not mean that it is right.
NevermoreLenore said:
If a woman has a skirt that touches the top of the knee or clothes that others decide are too clingy, it’s a complete and utter moral failing.
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This is ridiculous.

Some examples of “complete and utter moral failing”:

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HRH The Duchess of Cambridge

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Brigitte Macron, First Lady of France

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HM The Queen of Spain

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Sanna Marin, Prime Minister of Finland

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The Rt Hon. Jacinda Ardern, MP, Prime Minister of New Zealand
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I think all of these are very modest except for The Crown Princess of Sweden and the Prime Minister of New Zealand.

I don’t think they are dressed immodestly, but I would not consider tight pencil skirts & “blouse skirts” to be modest dress.
 
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My husband and I were at the Pogues reunion show some years back. We were up in the balcony. He was not much of a music head and did not appreciate the Pogues. He was more the Steely Dan sort.

The Black Cat was aromatic on many occasions.
 
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And dont forget to wear a slip with a dress. People dont realize how the sun passes through.

Modesty shorts under tennis or short uniforms.

For myself i love that i have nice undergarments.
 
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Tis_Bearself said:
Actually, the stinkiest city where I’ve ever spent time is Washington, DC.
There are a whole lot of young-ish people there who for whatever reason don’t think they need to do laundry or use deodorant.
My hobby for years used to be running around to see bands in various cities and one would often be standing in some club with a lot of other people within a foot of you…DC was always, always the smelliest place to see a show. I had to move to another part of the venue more than once.
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RolandThompsonGunner said:
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Tis_Bearself:
My hobby for years used to be running around to see bands in various cities and one would often be standing in some club with a lot of other people within a foot of you…DC was always, always the smelliest place to see a show. I had to move to another part of the venue more than once
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The 930 Club does smell like a foot. I saw the Pogues there, and while I was thrilled to see Shane MacGowans corpse stagger on stage…the venue did not smell like lavender.
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Funny you should mention DC, I lived there for almost a decade. With the possible exception of NYC, Toronto, London, and arguably Paris, I can’t imagine a more culturally diverse area — people come there from positively everywhere, and they bring their attitudes and habits with them, among these being hygiene. That said, there seemed to be some broad general agreement, and particularly offensive cases were few and far between. In the corporate world I worked in, when the odd office worker would have “distinctive” hygiene, it was usually just whispered behind their back, and in one case I’m pretty sure of, the inadvertent offender was gently spoken to about it behind closed doors with her supervisor.

I was never much for clubs or live music, though my wife and I did go to Blues Alley one time, and there was of course that glorious concert with Leonard Cohen at GWU Lisner Auditorium. Neither time did I notice bad hygiene. (At Leonard’s concert, that would have been the last thing on my mind.)

And in response to the inevitable question, when I visited Paris in 2010, I didn’t notice anything particularly offensive. The Métro was actually very pleasant, live music in the trains.
 
Margaret_Ann said:
IIRC, St. Padre Pio would not hear the confessions of women whose dresses/skirts were not at least 8 inches below the knee.
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Did he peek out of the confessional, ruler in hand? 🤔 Trying to picture how that worked, haha.
 
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Personally, I think the length of the dress of HRH the Duchess of Brabant is as short as I would feel comfortable going (I’m 5’2" by the way). My rule of thumb is 2" above the knee is modest. Miniskirts are to be avoided.
On a side note, I’m into Japanese street fashion, and it’s quite disheartening to see that all the skirts are so short. Makes shopping very hard, but oh well. Any effort required for the defense of virtue is effort worth taking.
 
scousekiwi said:
How often is your wife “soaking wet”? If you are worried about her skirt clinging to her legs or becoming see-through in the rain (a rather silly concern to entertain in my opinion), a more positive solution would be to give her an umbrella or a raincoat. I would add that a short skirt is something that she would presumably wear in the summer, so this concern would depend upon the climate where you live. I am from England, so we expect rain during the summer; people who live in Las Vegas, on the other hand, hardly see any rain all year.
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childinthefaith:
If my wife went out like that, she’d have some explaining to do when she got home, and I don’t care if she only walked down our street and back.
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I think if I ever told my wife that she had some explaining to do, she would probably book me a room at the Travelodge until I came to my senses.
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“100 lbs soaking wet” = a country people way of saying
people are heavier when wet, therefore, she probly weighs more like 95-98 dry.

. . . .

If I told her I had an issue with something she wore, we would discuss it and come to an agreement before she wore it. And, if it made ME uncomfortable, odds are she has more than enough class to not wear it.

Modesty sometimes seems a lost art nowadays. I’m just trying to save trouble.
See, if I take my wife somewhere and she is inappropriately dressed, then some dummy makes an inappropriate comment about how good she looks (and I already know she does), he’s going to get told to shut his trap and walk. . . .
 
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childinthefaith said:
So, her dressing appropriately simply keeps me out of county jail for the night, and saves us both bail money. Ya feel me on that?
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🤦‍♀️

The Church teaches that we should have the self-control to avoid these kinds of violent confrontations, so if a man said something inappropriate about your wife, you should be stepping away from it with your wife and if necessary calling security or the police to handle any harassment issue. Not getting into an altercation with the guy - and then somehow blaming your wife for your own lack of self-control.

Also, it would be prudent to pick places to go that attract polite men, not the kinds of men who are going to be eyeing and making untoward remarks about other men’s wives or girlfriends, regardless of what the woman might be wearing.
 
Jealousy + immaturity is definitely not a winning combination. I feel sorry for your wife. Sounds like you are comfortable blaming her for your shortcomings. Not saying you are, but that is how you are presenting yourself through your posts.
 
I think @childinthefaith is being a bit over the top with the bro-y bravado, but it is always odd when men seem to get shamed for saying they’d stand up for their wives if someone started making rude comments.

Like, I agree with the basic sentiment that you defend your wife. I just think he’s overestimating the extent a normal skirt is going to provoke a lot of wolf whistles and catcalls in normal life. Assuming we’re not talking about booty shorts and a shirt so small her breasts are spilling out, it’s not really going to be an issue, and 99.9% of women are going to have no interest going out like that anyway.
 
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The poster suggested the situation could become dangerous, with the outcome being a night in jail. That is shameful, and is not an appropriate defense.
 
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