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lewlo
Guest
I like that one too!
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tjmonica
Guest
Hello All,
Today is the day. Has anyone decided which prayer? I could go for any of them. (Many thanks to everyone who took the time to print out prayers!)
BTW, Other than Retrovaille (which my husband walked out on) does anyone know how to get help for hurting marraiges from the Catholic Church? It has been a big disappointment to me that parish priests don’t feel qualified to help in these matters. I did try to get counseling through Catholic Charities but they referred me to a feminist nun who advised me (within the first ten minutes of our first session) that my husband didn’t love me and that I needed to move on. Also, they referred my husband to anger management classes after which he became 100 times worse. Has anyone else had that experience?
Oh, Sparkle, I just wanted to let you know that a novena was a prayer that you say for nine days straight. If you already knew that, please forgive me. I never want to assume that a new Catholic knows all the lingo yet. Welcome home! I hope you find peace and comfort here in the Church.
Monica
Today is the day. Has anyone decided which prayer? I could go for any of them. (Many thanks to everyone who took the time to print out prayers!)
BTW, Other than Retrovaille (which my husband walked out on) does anyone know how to get help for hurting marraiges from the Catholic Church? It has been a big disappointment to me that parish priests don’t feel qualified to help in these matters. I did try to get counseling through Catholic Charities but they referred me to a feminist nun who advised me (within the first ten minutes of our first session) that my husband didn’t love me and that I needed to move on. Also, they referred my husband to anger management classes after which he became 100 times worse. Has anyone else had that experience?
Oh, Sparkle, I just wanted to let you know that a novena was a prayer that you say for nine days straight. If you already knew that, please forgive me. I never want to assume that a new Catholic knows all the lingo yet. Welcome home! I hope you find peace and comfort here in the Church.
Monica
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lewlo
Guest
I started out the day with the prayer Sparkle found. I will close with it as well. I have been praying for God to lead us to be the wives he wants us to be. (As well as conversion of husbands hearts, sorry, couldn’t help it) It’s 12:30 and I’m hungry, but mostly tired.
St. Rita, come to my aid!
Faithful loving wife and mother,
Humble, prayerful widow and nun,
Because of my need, answer my call.
St. Rita, come to my aid!
Beautiful rose born
from the Savior’s thorns,
Lead me far from anger and hate;
Guide my heart on peaceful paths
with charity to all.
St. Rita, come to my aid!
Helper, healer, holy friend
Hear my petition (make request).
To Christ take this prayer,
For He is my Lord, my God, my
All.
St. Rita, come to my aid!
Faithful loving wife and mother,
Humble, prayerful widow and nun,
Because of my need, answer my call.
St. Rita, come to my aid!
Beautiful rose born
from the Savior’s thorns,
Lead me far from anger and hate;
Guide my heart on peaceful paths
with charity to all.
St. Rita, come to my aid!
Helper, healer, holy friend
Hear my petition (make request).
To Christ take this prayer,
For He is my Lord, my God, my
All.
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sparkle
Guest
Hi Lewlo:
I’ve been fasting so far----well had a little nip of Scotch–is this allowed?
Anyway–have the prayer of St. Rita in my purse and am planning on fasting and praying all day and night for the conversion of our spouses!!
God Bless You in Your Life~ Isn’t it strange how we know so little about each other–what city and state we all live in yet we can converse and our hearts can be one? I find it utterly amazing!
I’ve been fasting so far----well had a little nip of Scotch–is this allowed?
Anyway–have the prayer of St. Rita in my purse and am planning on fasting and praying all day and night for the conversion of our spouses!!
God Bless You in Your Life~ Isn’t it strange how we know so little about each other–what city and state we all live in yet we can converse and our hearts can be one? I find it utterly amazing!
R
Romick
Guest
Well, I had a bad start, but decided to make my fast from noon today to noon tomorrow. I will pray that I can do that. If not I’ll try the next day and the next until I get it right!!
It is amazing, Sparkle, how little we know about each other’s demographics and yet know our hearts. We are all suffering in our marriages - me because my husband walked out - and you and others because your husbands are absent while still physically there. How sad when Christ instituted this Sacrament so that we could build beautiful unions and produce families. And we, or our spouses, have ignored the special graces He gave us.
To the one who posted about having trouble with the church giving help, I had the identical situation with a liberal nun - she told me to get my wedding band off or people would be making fun of me! Then a priest told me I could date even though I am still fully married! My priest told me to pretend my husband is dead! All we are asking of them is to encourage us in ways to endure in our vows to God, not intimacy advice, but some of them don’t seem to realize that. I have often thought I should start (and someone may already have) a movement to preserve marriage within the church! The Pope is very much pro-marriage and anti-divorce and annulment (to the extremes they are given out now.)
Sorry, I got on a tangent here. But you get the idea. Well, I have to try to get some work done so I don’t try to eat!
God bless.
It is amazing, Sparkle, how little we know about each other’s demographics and yet know our hearts. We are all suffering in our marriages - me because my husband walked out - and you and others because your husbands are absent while still physically there. How sad when Christ instituted this Sacrament so that we could build beautiful unions and produce families. And we, or our spouses, have ignored the special graces He gave us.
To the one who posted about having trouble with the church giving help, I had the identical situation with a liberal nun - she told me to get my wedding band off or people would be making fun of me! Then a priest told me I could date even though I am still fully married! My priest told me to pretend my husband is dead! All we are asking of them is to encourage us in ways to endure in our vows to God, not intimacy advice, but some of them don’t seem to realize that. I have often thought I should start (and someone may already have) a movement to preserve marriage within the church! The Pope is very much pro-marriage and anti-divorce and annulment (to the extremes they are given out now.)
Sorry, I got on a tangent here. But you get the idea. Well, I have to try to get some work done so I don’t try to eat!
God bless.
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lewlo
Guest
Romick, I just wanted to empathize with you, fasting can be difficult.
I wanted to clarify that when I fast I don’t do it for 24 hours. I fast all day and close the day with a simple and small meal. For instance, tonight I had a small salad, less dressing than usual and no “extras,” a serving of potatoes and three bites of meat. I drank water. My goal when fasting is to become uncomfortable or even in pain, so that I am reminded to stop and say a prayer. Sometimes I offer up my (very) small suffering. There have been days when I’m fasting and I’ve eaten a couple of grapes or something like that, but nothing enough to be considered a snack. The reason is that I get so tired when I don’t eat and usually can’t take a nap because I’m so busy with the kids and house, etc.
Anyway, hang in there!
I wanted to clarify that when I fast I don’t do it for 24 hours. I fast all day and close the day with a simple and small meal. For instance, tonight I had a small salad, less dressing than usual and no “extras,” a serving of potatoes and three bites of meat. I drank water. My goal when fasting is to become uncomfortable or even in pain, so that I am reminded to stop and say a prayer. Sometimes I offer up my (very) small suffering. There have been days when I’m fasting and I’ve eaten a couple of grapes or something like that, but nothing enough to be considered a snack. The reason is that I get so tired when I don’t eat and usually can’t take a nap because I’m so busy with the kids and house, etc.
Anyway, hang in there!
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tjmonica
Guest
Romick had a great idea. I think either a prayer and/or activist movement to help the Church help save marraiges is badly needed. My Protestant friends are incredulous that I can’t just go to my Church and have them solve my problems. There is something ironic in the fact that they bad-mouth Catholicism, but think highly enough of the Church that they think if you are in enough trouble, you can always turn to her for help. Didn’t it used to actually be that way?
Sparkle, I loved the Saint Rita prayer. With all of us praying for each other as well as ourselves, we are bound to build up our strength and our faith and (hopefully) our families.
It’s great to have a place where I don’t feel criticized for staying married. Thanks everyone.
Monica
Sparkle, I loved the Saint Rita prayer. With all of us praying for each other as well as ourselves, we are bound to build up our strength and our faith and (hopefully) our families.
It’s great to have a place where I don’t feel criticized for staying married. Thanks everyone.
Monica
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sharonvanecek
Guest
Glory to God and thanks to St Rita for her intercessions. I fasted on fish and water yesterday. I prayed to St. Rita and am thanking her today. I feel more blessed in praying for your marriages than I did in just praying for my own. I feel much closer to Jesus suffering on the cross. The weight of my load has gotten so heavy lately that I ask him to carry me now ( like in footprints in the sand). The first 2 yrs after my husband left us to live in Europe, I was so energetic in putting myself in His hands, working 7 days per wk and still trying to be there for the kids, but this past 6 mos I am struggling not to be defeated and depressed. I feel like I just can’t do it anymore and that it can’t possibly be the will of the Lord for us to be living like this. We need to remember that whatever happens is His will and He has heard our prayers and He loves us more than any person can love us.
PS Fasting is something I am terrible at.
Lewlo’s advice is the best I have ever heard.
PS Fasting is something I am terrible at.
Lewlo’s advice is the best I have ever heard.
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sharonvanecek
Guest
Yeah, I like that idea, even though I am a terribly faster, I will do it on the 12 th for this cause, by the way: I want to share with you advice given to me by Fr Corapi, which keeps me going on in this arid marriage. Love is a decision. In marriage we are called to bring our spouses and children and selves to heaven. This is our duty. The struggle and the suffering have merit. We must be faithful and not give up ever. This will save our soul. Even if it kills us, or we die in the process, we must strive to bring them to Jesus. In a way we are saints giving everything up toward that goal and we may be martyrs. I am willing to do that. Sometimes it means saying nothing, just praying. Protecting my children from his actions is also part of my duty, such as pornography, I take them away, tell him to turn it off or I leave the house with the kids. It is very hard. I did not want my marriage to be like this. Sometimes I regret marrying him, but I know that I am here now and God is using me here. It would be wrong for me to abandon my vocation. Where would divorce get us, more hurts on top of the already hurt and he would go off sinning all the more, maybe I would sin in ways I had not in the marriage and then we have sin upon sin and no one saved. Love, Sharon
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AnnieD
Guest
I agree 100 Percent. You ladies deserve so much more out of life. You deserve Respect and Love and Kindness. Wish there was something I could do to help. Being treated that way for a long enough time, does a real job on self esteem, and makes it harder to do something for yourself. You are in my prayers.
Hugs,
Annie
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sparkle
Guest
Hi Friends:
I have been praying the prayer to St. Rita alot. Carry it in my purse. Fasting, I’m going to do again this week, tomorrow I think. When I fast, it’s nothing for 24 hours except water or fruit juice. It really clears the head, and body, mind and spirit. If I even have one nibble of anything–I feel like for me, I broke the fast and have to start over.
I also like someone’s idea in the Spirituality Thread about putting a rosary under our spouses pillow and praying for them as we fall asleep. WOW!!! I’ll try it tonite!!! It’s under “Love the Rosary–is it Normal”? A great thread BTW!------
God Bless You Ladies—let’s talk soon.
I have been praying the prayer to St. Rita alot. Carry it in my purse. Fasting, I’m going to do again this week, tomorrow I think. When I fast, it’s nothing for 24 hours except water or fruit juice. It really clears the head, and body, mind and spirit. If I even have one nibble of anything–I feel like for me, I broke the fast and have to start over.
I also like someone’s idea in the Spirituality Thread about putting a rosary under our spouses pillow and praying for them as we fall asleep. WOW!!! I’ll try it tonite!!! It’s under “Love the Rosary–is it Normal”? A great thread BTW!------
God Bless You Ladies—let’s talk soon.
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tjmonica
Guest
Sparkle,
The more I pray the prayer to St. Rita that you found, the more I love it.
How are things going, everyone?
Love, Monica
The more I pray the prayer to St. Rita that you found, the more I love it.
How are things going, everyone?
Love, Monica
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lewlo
Guest
More hurting marriages around me. A Christian friend crying the other night that her marriage was in trouble. I think I will fast again this Friday.
My husband came up behind me and hugged me yesterday and said softly that he was “sorry I give you such a hard time sometimes.” It’s a direct result of your prayers and I am thankful. I try not to get too hopeful,though. Peace is shortlived at my house. Once when my husband was going through an especially verbally and (slightly) physically abusive time, some friends and family members were really praying for him. It absolutely helped. But I think he needs a 24-hr prayer chain . *
On the bright side, things aren’t that bad now!*
My husband came up behind me and hugged me yesterday and said softly that he was “sorry I give you such a hard time sometimes.” It’s a direct result of your prayers and I am thankful. I try not to get too hopeful,though. Peace is shortlived at my house. Once when my husband was going through an especially verbally and (slightly) physically abusive time, some friends and family members were really praying for him. It absolutely helped. But I think he needs a 24-hr prayer chain
. *On the bright side, things aren’t that bad now!*
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Cathy
Guest
I just saw this thread for the first time tonight, and I feel as if I’ve found some kindred spirits. Before I finished reading the entire thread, I prayed a Rosary for all of you. I’m grateful for the advice on prayer and relating to a non-believing husband. I need this advice as well. God bless you and your families, Sparkle, and all.
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Lance
Guest
To all you ladies out there:
There are only 3 reasons to end a marriage. They are the 3 ‘A’s’, Abuse, addiction and adultry. I am not saying you should get a divorce, I am just saying if your spouse is doing one of the 3 ‘A’s’ **and will not seek help ** get out of the relationship. Go live with a family member or friend, go to a shelter if you have to. Get counseling, talk to you priest, he can help. Most of you are smart and can support youselves and your family and will be happier without the person who is pulling you down. Once he sees that you can make it without him he is much more likely to seek help and begin to change. Again I am in no way advising you to go against the teaching of the Church. If you end up in a civil divorce you can still live a life acceptable to God and His Church but before you go that far try everything else but do not continue to put up with the actions of the one who is controling you. And if you are wondering yes, I am a man.
There are only 3 reasons to end a marriage. They are the 3 ‘A’s’, Abuse, addiction and adultry. I am not saying you should get a divorce, I am just saying if your spouse is doing one of the 3 ‘A’s’ **and will not seek help ** get out of the relationship. Go live with a family member or friend, go to a shelter if you have to. Get counseling, talk to you priest, he can help. Most of you are smart and can support youselves and your family and will be happier without the person who is pulling you down. Once he sees that you can make it without him he is much more likely to seek help and begin to change. Again I am in no way advising you to go against the teaching of the Church. If you end up in a civil divorce you can still live a life acceptable to God and His Church but before you go that far try everything else but do not continue to put up with the actions of the one who is controling you. And if you are wondering yes, I am a man.
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Pinklady
Guest
Well, if you subscribe to the teachings of the Church and you’re validly married to this lout, you’re stuck.
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shannin
Guest
Friends:
Iand I just need some encouragement today. I prayed my FIRST Rosary today after Mass–wow what power in it! I know somewhere on this Forum are numeous threads about this and that–but thought I’d start a new one for any women Friends out there who have similar woes, on this day, week, whatever. Maybe we can encourage each other today.
Dear Sister
I’d like to start a spiritual bouquet this Advent season with some of the women here, where we could pray for each other & offer encouragement. If you or anyone else is interested, please e-mail me. I’ve never done one before, but I pray often.
Shannin
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sparkle
Guest
Hi Lance!
YES, I totally agree with your “3 A’s”----I think this too! Do you think porn addiction qualifies for “addiction”? I do. Counseling for this one–and the counselor said he needs a 12 step group. He went once. Pray he’ll go again! Thx for the imput!
Ladies:
Hello all! Yes–let’s be a support for one another on this one! Let’s perhaps pick a day to pray the Rosary together and fast once in a while–fasting’s a hard one but weekly Rosary would be great --for the conversion of hubbies–and for us—to be patient and endure and be the wives God calls US to be. How about Fridays for this?
Any thoughts?
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Ana
Guest
I just read this entire thread … WHEW!!
I found the encouragment, charity and fellowship just beautiful. There is truly a wonderful bunch of people here. A true example of a willingness to carry eachothers burdens and edify one another. I am too late to join the fast and I would have had to take Monica’s route (sometimes eating extra is more of a fast for me). A spiritual bouquet sounds wonderful, but I don’t know how to do one.
Sparkle, you are blessed to have such wonderful support. BTW, welcome to the Church and I think you will find the Rosary to be a powerful tool on your journey.
I found the encouragment, charity and fellowship just beautiful. There is truly a wonderful bunch of people here. A true example of a willingness to carry eachothers burdens and edify one another. I am too late to join the fast and I would have had to take Monica’s route (sometimes eating extra is more of a fast for me). A spiritual bouquet sounds wonderful, but I don’t know how to do one.
Sparkle, you are blessed to have such wonderful support. BTW, welcome to the Church and I think you will find the Rosary to be a powerful tool on your journey.
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sparkle
Guest
God Bless YOU Ana!!! And thank you so much for your encouragement! Yes, the Rosary I’m finding to be just awesome!!! God Bless You today in your life and in your journey whatever that may be~~~~
We women have got to stick together huh? And try to BE the women God has called us to be, don’t you think so? One friend on this thread said: Life does not guarantee our happiness, that is not promised, but no matter what, God does call us to be faithful anyway…and that is what we all must be. It’s most hard sometimes, but I believe it don’t you? And we’ve got to try~~~
Have a blessed day friend~~
Luv,
Sparkle
“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”
Phillipians 4:13 *
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