Have you ever felt embarrassed to confess a sin to a priest?

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baltobetsy said:
What good is an impersonal confession?
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What good is a confession unless we put God at the centre?
Do we confess our sin because we have offended ourselves or because we have offended God?

Paraphrasing St John of the Cross: Forgetful of self, I went out and met God.
 
That only happened to me once.
i was soo embarrassed to tell my sin:eek:
 
KEVIN_WILCOX said:
Batfink

Presumption is also a sin.
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I realise that, and although it is at times in the past a sin I have been guilty of it wasn’t what I was refering to earlier. What I meant by turning back to God after having sinned was running to meet Him in confession and then rejoicing that I had been forgiven, not committing the sin in the first place with the presumption of forgiveness. I’m sorry if I didn’t express myself very well; I do understand the gravity of presumption, I was just referencing trying to let go and move on from the past after the Sacrament of Reconciliation.
 
Batfink

“The greatest of all evils is not to be tempted, because there are then grounds for believing that the devil looks upon us as his property” (St John Vianney)

“This foul, wretched lump called sin is none other than yourself and though you do not consider it in detail, you understand now that it is part and parcel of your very being and something that separates you from God.
The contemplative work of love by itself will eventually heal you of all the roots of sin. Fast as much as you like, watch far into the night, rise long before dawn, discipline your body, and if it were permitted – which it is not – put out your eyes, tear out your tongue, plug up your ears and nose, and cut off your limbs; yes, chastise your body with every discipline and you would still gain nothing. The desire and tendency toward sin would remain in your heart” (Anonymous, The Cloud of Unknowing)
 
Since I have a regular confessor, and (like I suppose most people do,) I struggle with the same old, same old crummy sins repeatedly, it not only is painful to confess these because they offend God, but I also feel very sheepish about the repetitive nature of them. Intellectually, it does make sense ( you’re going to sin where your weakest tendency lies, and that doesn’t change, it’s part of your temperament.) But I am still left with the self-denigration–“how could I be such an idiot?” feeling.
 
odile53 said:
Since I have a regular confessor, and (like I suppose most people do,) I struggle with the same old, same old crummy sins repeatedly, it not only is painful to confess these because they offend God, but I also feel very sheepish about the repetitive nature of them. Intellectually, it does make sense ( you’re going to sin where your weakest tendency lies, and that doesn’t change, it’s part of your temperament.) But I am still left with the self-denigration–“how could I be such an idiot?” feeling.
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Same old sins. As though Jesus were to complain “I’ve been hanging on this cross for a while now, can I have another one, a new one?”

Sins have many names, when really there’s only one “My way, not Thy way.”

“There is one sort of temperance for those of good conduct and another for those inclined to particular weaknesses. Among the former any kind of bodily stirring evokes an immediate urge to restraint, while among the latter there is no relief or relaxation from such stirrings until the very day they die. The former strive always for peace of mind, while the latter try to appease God by their contrition” (St John Climacus, c.509-649)
 
I’ve felt embarrassed before and during Confession. I think it’s worse to deliberately cover up something, though, so it’s best to just ‘get it out’ and say it. The priest is there to pray with us for God’s forgiveness. If we are too afraid, our sin problems may fester and be worse later on. I find it helped me to write little notes before Confession (and get rid of them afterward).
 
lampstand, exactly what the practice was of the early monks. Examination of conscience; it helps arrive at determining a root cause, or a major sin from which the smaller ones, like air-borne seed, take wing, lodge, take root and start to grow.

I find I get a little self-conscious in the Confessional, don’t know exactly where to start. But like thread in a tapestry when I get hold of a loose thread, and start to pull, the whole bundle starts to unravel. Up until then it was like holding my breath, as I go on, breathing becomes easier until it becomes a sigh of relief.

And it’s a lot easier when the screen’s in place; breaking down feelings of self-consciousness.
 
Impersonal Confession is waaay (100%) better than not confessing at all, and most of all, it works.

I confess that way weekly.
And, the priest doesn’t object. And Jesus forgives me for my sins.

And I do not hide anything, it’s complete.

Hiding sins in confession is considered sacrilege, and the confession is considered nullified

Read:

Venerable Louis of Granada - Memorial of Christian Life
saintsworks.net/books/Ven.%20Louis%20of%20Granada%20-%20A%20Memorial%20of%20a%20Christian%20Life.pdf

Parts about confession, it’s good:thumbsup:

Trust in God’s mercy though, or you can fall to despair, and it’s a temptation

Read also the Diary of St. Faustina Kowalska - Divine Mercy in my soul, it’s available online

saintsbooks.net/
 
mariafransisca1 said:
Impersonal Confession is waaay (100%) better than not confessing at all, and most of all, it works.

I confess that way weekly.
And, the priest doesn’t object. And Jesus forgives me for my sins.

And I do not hide anything, it’s complete.
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Maybe I misunderstood you. Are you saying that you actually accuse yourself of breaking every one of the commandments using the words in the earlier post every week? It seems to me that doing that is a very good way of hiding your real sins among a bunch of generalizations.

On the other hand, if you only confess what you’ve actually done, using that kind of description, it’s not quite so bad.

Still, confessing impersonally removes a good deal of intimacy from the confession and also the chance to receive good advice from the priest. No matter how painful and embarrassing, I would still want to be more candid.
 
KEVIN_WILCOX said:
**
And it’s a lot easier when the screen’s in place; breaking down feelings of self-consciousness.**

I find it depends. If it’s a priest I don’t know, then yes, the screen helps. So if I’m on holiday and go to confession, I would prefer it to remain anonymous. However, usually I know the priest and then I much prefer to look him straight in the eyes and say “I did this…”, none of this impersonal stuff,for me!

I know the priest knows it’s me anyway, so rather than have to go through a false process of explaining my family situation, life background etc so he could give me appropriate advice when he clearly already knew that stuff, I go to face-to-face confession and we just get straight down to business - he knows me, I know him, I’ll get over the embarrassment and just recognise that he’s hearing the confession in place of God.

The more embarrassing it is, the more I’d rather look im in the eye and say it properly, partly so I can avoid that whole “Bless me Father, I have [mumble mumble very fast and quiet mumble]” thing I was prone to. 🤷
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I recently heard in a talk about confession some people’s tendancies to try and slip big sins in with a few little sins, something like this:

I slapped my sister, I stole some candy, [quickly] I stabbed my brother, and didn’t clean my room. LOL! So true!
 
TheMc said:
I recently heard in a talk about confession some people’s tendancies to try and slip big sins in with a few little sins, something like this:

I slapped my sister, I stole some candy, [quickly] I stabbed my brother, and didn’t clean my room. LOL! So true!
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Lol, yeah, I’ve considered doing that! [N.B. I have never considered stabbing my brother, should he read this, except maybe once when I found out he’d eaten all the biscuits and left the empty packet in the cupboard!]
 
Batfink said:
Lol, yeah, I’ve considered doing that! [N.B. I have never considered stabbing my brother, should he read this, except maybe once when I found out he’d eaten all the biscuits and left the empty packet in the cupboard
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!]

ROFL!!
 
Telling my sins is always difficult. None of them are sources of pride!! But it really does help me to be more humble, to tell someone I look up to and admire about my failings. It also helps me focus for the next weeks to work harder not to sin. I don’t want to come into confession with no improvement of any kind and it keeps me thinking daily about what I need to do. Daily examinations of conscience help me grow spiritually also. Sometimes just seeing my confessor helps me remember why I’m here on earth and what I don’t want to be like. I love confession because it is difficult. It’s more than worth the difficulty, I think.
 
Confession does not equate to spiritual direction, it may be part of it. Usually they are compatible not synonymous.

Seeing a psychiatrist for diagnosis and medication is usually not the same as seeing a clinical psychologist.
It may be within the psychiatrist’s training and ability to work with a patient, however the fields are different.
 
Face-to-face confession isn’t unfortunate at all. I remember the days before we could go face-to-face, and I think it was a good move on the part of the church to allow us to confess either way.

It is very difficult for me to go face-to-face to the priest I trust most, and, of course, that is just the priest I should be seeing. I could go behind the screen, but I realized that to confess without a screen would be a way to show God all my love and repentance. I have a great deal of respect for this priest and realized I didn’t want him to know certain things about me. (Prior to that I would confess to priests I didn’t know.)

I realized that this was a way to humble myself. and that is what I did.

Since then I have realized the benefits. This priest now knows me, he knows my darkest struggles, and he can then suggest a penance that better helps me realize what I have done. He can give me advice that helps me to grow and to at least lessen my habitual sins. He could do this anyway to some degree, but he knows me now and it makes his advice and penance much better.

We didn’t even have confessionals until around the 16th century (I think.) I have heard through a priest that at one time in Church history mentoring was a part of confession. Though mentoring can be done with a screen, it is so much more effective if you know who you are talking to.
 
I had my first confession a week ago with a French priest and I told him everything including of my gay tendencies and sexual sins… I wasn’t embrassed as I made an appointment to meet him. I prefer telling such stuffs to a western priests instead of an asian.

Going back to confession very soon…SAME sins to confess again
 
Incomplete said:
Face-to-face confession isn’t unfortunate at all. I remember the days before we could go face-to-face, and I think it was a good move on the part of the church to allow us to confess either way.

It is very difficult for me to go face-to-face to the priest I trust most, and, of course, that is just the priest I should be seeing. I could go behind the screen, but I realized that to confess without a screen would be a way to show God all my love and repentance. I have a great deal of respect for this priest and realized I didn’t want him to know certain things about me. (Prior to that I would confess to priests I didn’t know.)

I realized that this was a way to humble myself. and that is what I did.

Since then I have realized the benefits. This priest now knows me, he knows my darkest struggles, and he can then suggest a penance that better helps me realize what I have done. He can give me advice that helps me to grow and to at least lessen my habitual sins. He could do this anyway to some degree, but he knows me now and it makes his advice and penance much better.

We didn’t even have confessionals until around the 16th century (I think.) I have heard through a priest that at one time in Church history mentoring was a part of confession. Though mentoring can be done with a screen, it is so much more effective if you know who you are talking to.
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Ageed. I feel pretty bad about purposely avoiding my priest in confession recently…
 
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