P
psr13
Guest
I do not wear makeup. I feel that we should be happy with what God gave us. I do not find makeup to be necessary or appropriate. My husband feels the same way.
No offense taken. This has more to do with the appeal of selling the product, more like if you found the product or service to be attractive, if you believe in it, you have the drive to circulate it or the idea, you must be just as good or attractive as the product and therefore want to sell it that way. I can understand this concept for advertising or marketing.I never wear makeup. I do work in a professional environment (defence engineering) but don’t have time/can’t be bothered/couldn’t justify the expense, and I refuse to, in about equal parts.
I can’t cope with this idea that a woman must paint her face as part of professional grooming and I’d be prepared to lose/leave a job over it. I have no problem with dress codes, nor with the need to look immaculate in some occupations. The difference to me is that we all have to dress and tidy our hair, so variations in the way we do that to suit our job is reasonable, but my face is me and I think it’s unacceptable to suggest a female employee must paint/change/alter hers to be considered “professional”. (This is not aimed at you, OLHope, I know you’re stating a general expectation.)
The exceptions to that are performing arts and modelling where make up is a part of bringing out features and expressions on camera and on stage, but in those cases it applies to both genders and achieves a specific purpose.
It also bothers me a little when people talk of women who can “get away” with not wearing make-up, as if there is some defined benchmark for a woman’s appearance rating that she must apologise for falling short of.
IMO some occupational make-up is self-defeating. When I had long hair and wore it up, it had to be a style I knew would stay up securely all day without three maintenance trips to the ladies room to re-fasten it. I feel the same about make-up - if it needs maintenance, forget it. Maybe the airline stewardesses look great when they first get to work but by halfway through their shift makeup usually looks tired and oily and my reaction is “yuck”, not, “isn’t that make-up the finishing touch to a nice professional appearance.” I’d rather see a clean face.
I am probably over-sensitive as my mother spent her whole life apologising to the rest of the world for everything including her appearance, and I had to put a conscious wall up against her projecting the same attitudes onto me.
All that said, I have no issues whatsoever with other women wearing makeup. If it makes any woman feel happier, more confident, more feminine or she just plain likes to do it, then I’m all for it and it’s a good thing. It’s attempts to make it a requirement or inferences that a woman is ungroomed or unprofessional till she paints her face that I object to.
Wow, I sometimes wish my wife would be youwhen my oldest daughter (a very modest young woman) was seventeen, she mentioned that she wasn’t sure she wanted bunches of kids. why? because moms with so many kids look so worried and worn out.
she was talking about me.
since then, I’ve worn makeup almost every day for the last 5 years. if i go out, i wear make-up. i’m out of the house a lot. i’m 46.
when i look at pics of me in my 30’s i cringe. my hair was long and unkept, my clothes sloppy (i was thinking Bohemian, but they were really just sloppy) my face was blotchy, half pale, half red, and i had dark circles under my eyes. i showered every day, but i looked like i was dragged down the street by a tractor.
no wonder back then, with 5 or 6 or 7 kids in tow, people (including rude strangers) felt like they had permission to make suggestions about my lack of sleep/ family size/ eating habits/ etc. “Oh honey, when is it time for you…?” i didn’t know it, but perhaps i was a negative witness for Catholic marriage and openness to life. worse still, maybe i was becoming a negative witness to my own kids, especially daughters.
Saint Paul said, “when you are in Rome…”
well, i’m not in Rome, but here in un-Rome, well-groomed women:
keep their hair neat (I cut mine quite short)
wear decent clothes (now i buy the best i can find at salvation army, not the most funky bohemian styles)
groom their nails (i stopped biting mine and wear a clear gloss every day)
wear make-up if necessary (and it’s necessary for me if i don’t want to look exhausted and harried.)
folks seem to perceive me as happier/ better adjusted/ less harried/ now with ten kids than back when i had half as many. that good impression makes me a more positive witness for Catholic motherhood. smiling helps a lot, too.
what make-up do i wear? a lot. i start every day with a skin care routine-- cleanser and moisture. i wear a some concealer, a light foundation, mascara, blush, lip gloss and a cream colored shadow to lighten my old-looking eye lids.
i didn’t know how to put makeup on, so i learned from a Mary Kay consultant. when one of my sisters watched me put my make-up on, she was amazed that i wore so many products and they were so invisible. they simply make me look better, not made-up. (the mascara looks like make-up.)
coffee/ shower/ hair/ make-up and more coffee takes me 20- 25 minutes. i always have the company of several kids while i’m at it. i’m never alone.
i wear earrings every day too.
and many days i wear a natural scent called “Holy Water” which is misnamed. it is precisely the beautiful scent of a baptized baby.
my husband absolutely prefers this look.
“Wives should ask yourselves whether you are not forgetting a little about your appearance… Your duty is and always will be to take as good care of your appearance as you did before you were married and it is a duty of justice because you belong to your husband… husbands… have the obligation to show the same affection as a young man who has just fallen in love. It would be a bad sign if you smile ironically as you hear this; it would mean that your love has turned into cold indifference.” Jose Maria Escriva,*** Christ is Passing By***
as others have mentioned, it ***could ***be expensive. but for several years i’ve been selling MaryKay-- not a huge business, just enough to sell products to all my family and friends at a good discount, then i get my products for free. i place 4 big orders a year. my gal pals and sisters know when it’s time to order, know they’ll be saving 25% and they love that. and i get my stuff for free.
Excellent post! :clapping: I too went through a “frumpy” stage in adjusting to stay-at-home motherhood. I also cringe at some old pictures of me from back then. The world judges based on appearance and most women want to be attractive. It may be a bad witness to our faith and motherhood when formerly pulled-together, attractive women turn frumpy as soon as they have children.when my oldest daughter (a very modest young woman) was seventeen, she mentioned that she wasn’t sure she wanted bunches of kids. why? because moms with so many kids look so worried and worn out.
she was talking about me.
since then, I’ve worn makeup almost every day for the last 5 years. if i go out, i wear make-up. i’m out of the house a lot. i’m 46.
when i look at pics of me in my 30’s i cringe. my hair was long and unkept, my clothes sloppy (i was thinking Bohemian, but they were really just sloppy) my face was blotchy, half pale, half red, and i had dark circles under my eyes. i showered every day, but i looked like i was dragged down the street by a tractor.
no wonder back then, with 5 or 6 or 7 kids in tow, people (including rude strangers) felt like they had permission to make suggestions about my lack of sleep/ family size/ eating habits/ etc. “Oh honey, when is it time for you…?” i didn’t know it, but perhaps i was a negative witness for Catholic marriage and openness to life. worse still, maybe i was becoming a negative witness to my own kids, especially daughters. …
“Wives should ask yourselves whether you are not forgetting a little about your appearance… Your duty is and always will be to take as good care of your appearance as you did before you were married and it is a duty of justice because you belong to your husband… husbands… have the obligation to show the same affection as a young man who has just fallen in love. It would be a bad sign if you smile ironically as you hear this; it would mean that your love has turned into cold indifference.” Jose Maria Escriva,*** Christ is Passing By***
…
I’m with you- it takes me that long just to get the first cup of coffee ready.Sarabande, I am absolutely in awe. You can do all that in 15-20 minutes? :bowdown:
It takes me longer than that just to get out of bed and remember how to turn on the shower!
:bowdown::bowdown::bowdown:
Same here. I was also in the group of women who would never, under any circumstances, leave the house without makeup on. But I found that my appearance and wanting to have the world “like” me in that way caused me more harm than looking “pretty” did.I do not wear makeup. I feel that we should be happy with what God gave us. I do not find makeup to be necessary or appropriate. My husband feels the same way.
Sarabande, I am absolutely in awe. You can do all that in 15-20 minutes? :bowdown:
It takes me longer than that just to get out of bed and remember how to turn on the shower!
:bowdown::bowdown::bowdown:
You really make an excellent point with your post and I never thought of it that way, until I read your post. Then it reminded me of how when I was a teen, I’d look at mothers with lots of kids and felt sorry for them because they just seemed so harried, depressed and tired. They probably weren’t even like that in reality, but their outward appearance made it seem so. I never equated it with the mothers just not taking care of themselves. I thought their children made them that way and it made me think how depressing it must be. I now understand that isn’t always the case and that I think most of the parents who have a lot of kids lovingly choose and accept it. I now wonder if those mothers did take just a little time to groom themselves, if they would have produced a different reaction from my teenaged self and from other teenaged girls.when my oldest daughter (a very modest young woman) was seventeen, she mentioned that she wasn’t sure she wanted bunches of kids. why? because moms with so many kids look so worried and worn out.
she was talking about me.
since then, I’ve worn makeup almost every day for the last 5 years. if i go out, i wear make-up. i’m out of the house a lot. i’m 46
…
no wonder back then, with 5 or 6 or 7 kids in tow, people (including rude strangers) felt like they had permission to make suggestions about my lack of sleep/ family size/ eating habits/ etc. “Oh honey, when is it time for you…?” i didn’t know it, but perhaps i was a negative witness for Catholic marriage and openness to life. worse still, maybe i was becoming a negative witness to my own kids, especially daughters.
:aok:I generally do not wear make-up.
Much to the relief to the ladies I have dated.