R
RepetantCatholic
Guest
I hope I get some support here and I don’t know if this is the right place to post this. I’m in my thirties and I’m disabled so I stopped working at the age of thirty. I gave up porn at twenty-seven, been celibate since then only rarely masturbating. In my teen years I would attend mass driving myself to church. In college I would go to a local church weekly.
The illness I developed started in my early twenties. Nonetheless, I was able to work until thirty before it was determined by Psychiatrists and a Therapist it was best I go on Disability. I’m celibate and won’t get married because I have an inheritable illness and I wouldn’t want to pass that down.
Now, no one can ever know until death how they stand with God. But since 27 I have been praying the Rosary and last year discovered Divine Office. So, in general but not always I will pray the Rosary and participate in an Divine Office group, both online. I’ve read parts of the Old Testament, all the Gospels, most of the Epistles. But Currently I’m going back and reading the Bible with more mature eyes. From about 21-27 I did some things I regret but nothing major and I have already confessed these sins.
So, I feel I was chastised by developing this illness but it is to my benefit as I’ve grown more loving and compassionate since then. And if God wants growth, then I’ve done it and I’m doing it.
But here is what occurred to me. There is a local Radio Station with a show called the John and Ken show. Now, I’ll listen to anything as I’m a moderate. But these are really, really far-right and both are atheists. One of them, John, is chauvinistic and harasses the news girl Deborah Marks. It’s totally sleezy and borders on creepy the way he regards her. I cringe even listening to it. I’m obviously sure she can sue for harassment.
So, now that I’m older I’ve come to acknowledge and accept there is a Hell. I don’t know who goes to it or how many end up there. But in listening to this show, I realize, “these guys are probably going to hell.” They believe in Social Darwinism and are atheistic and on top of that have sleezy behaviors towards women. So, these guys might be going to Hell.
It’s shocking to write that. I don’t condemn people and I know for certain there is a God, it’s just it took my late thirties to accept there is a Hell. If you are a younger Catholic or a less experienced Catholic down the road of Catholicism you will have to one day accept there is a Hell and Satan. I was a naive happy go lucky Catholic before. Back then I thought Hell didn’t exist and everyone can be saved. So, in that acknowledgement of Hell comes the acknowledgment that people will go to it. And when you are fully aware of it, it will shock you when you realize someone like a celebrity or someone famous or someone with musical and artistic talents or the most gorgeous looks or the greatest intellect may end up there.
Thanks for reading. If this is not the write place to post this, please move it to the right place. I had to shorten, but I wanted to get everyone’s take on this.
The illness I developed started in my early twenties. Nonetheless, I was able to work until thirty before it was determined by Psychiatrists and a Therapist it was best I go on Disability. I’m celibate and won’t get married because I have an inheritable illness and I wouldn’t want to pass that down.
Now, no one can ever know until death how they stand with God. But since 27 I have been praying the Rosary and last year discovered Divine Office. So, in general but not always I will pray the Rosary and participate in an Divine Office group, both online. I’ve read parts of the Old Testament, all the Gospels, most of the Epistles. But Currently I’m going back and reading the Bible with more mature eyes. From about 21-27 I did some things I regret but nothing major and I have already confessed these sins.
So, I feel I was chastised by developing this illness but it is to my benefit as I’ve grown more loving and compassionate since then. And if God wants growth, then I’ve done it and I’m doing it.
But here is what occurred to me. There is a local Radio Station with a show called the John and Ken show. Now, I’ll listen to anything as I’m a moderate. But these are really, really far-right and both are atheists. One of them, John, is chauvinistic and harasses the news girl Deborah Marks. It’s totally sleezy and borders on creepy the way he regards her. I cringe even listening to it. I’m obviously sure she can sue for harassment.
So, now that I’m older I’ve come to acknowledge and accept there is a Hell. I don’t know who goes to it or how many end up there. But in listening to this show, I realize, “these guys are probably going to hell.” They believe in Social Darwinism and are atheistic and on top of that have sleezy behaviors towards women. So, these guys might be going to Hell.
It’s shocking to write that. I don’t condemn people and I know for certain there is a God, it’s just it took my late thirties to accept there is a Hell. If you are a younger Catholic or a less experienced Catholic down the road of Catholicism you will have to one day accept there is a Hell and Satan. I was a naive happy go lucky Catholic before. Back then I thought Hell didn’t exist and everyone can be saved. So, in that acknowledgement of Hell comes the acknowledgment that people will go to it. And when you are fully aware of it, it will shock you when you realize someone like a celebrity or someone famous or someone with musical and artistic talents or the most gorgeous looks or the greatest intellect may end up there.
Thanks for reading. If this is not the write place to post this, please move it to the right place. I had to shorten, but I wanted to get everyone’s take on this.
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