Marriage with an atheist

  • Thread starter Thread starter shanishani7
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We are not promised that God has a perfect spouse picked out for us. That is romantic Hallmark card stuff, but, it denies free will.

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That’s not entirely true since we have the free will to marry them or not and vice versa.
 
Some couples are so united, they really have a zero percent chance of divorce. Have you ever been blessed to meet such a couple?
 
In fact, the couples that I know who seem this way on the outside have all ended up divorced.

The couples who are open with their friends about struggles, who are not ashamed to be imperfect, they last forever.
 
TheLittleLady said:
In fact, the couples that I know who seem this way on the outside have all ended up divorced.
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Yes… It was important for me that both me and my husband are ok with discussing our problems outside with friends or professionals. I once experienced the opposite in a former relationship and it was horrible, it’s often pressure. Close friends of us married some months after us and we are often talking about personal issues. Once she told me that this was the reason she wanted us to stay in their house before the wedding day, because it calmed them and they could talk openly.
 
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So I guess you don’t know anybody who’s been married for many years whose marriages you believe will certainly last? Do you all have parents that are together? Is there no confidence in a solid Catholic marriage amongst CAF members?
 
This is not the topic we are referring to. You painted an image of couples that seem so united on the outside that they would never divorce. Of course there are couples who have life long marriages. But here you were simply told that those couples in fact aren’t the ones who never have visible troubles.
 
Of course I know long marriages, my own has lasted decades. My adult son has no divorced grandparents.

What I am saying is that of the couples I have known, the couples who appear “perfect” do not last. The couples who do last are honest with friends and family that there have been hard times, that they have each made mistakes and they have simply stayed married. As several couples who have been married 50 years have told me, the way to stay married is to not every consider divorce an option. Many of them have had rough times, some have had separations, in the end they make it through.

Perfect in the outside is never what it seems.

ETA This does not mean that lasting couples share every fight and every wrinkle with the world either. They have a deep respect for their spouse’s privacy. They do not participate in “let’s all sit around and gripe about our husbands/wives” sessions that can be so popular.

At the same time, they will sit down and talk with a young couple in crisis and share their own struggles in order to help them see that marriage is a journey, not a vacation. The thought that perfect couples never disagree is simply a lie.

And these solid marriages run the gamut from natural marriages between two non believers to marriages between two Catholics.
 
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In that case, the OP has nothing to fear. However, my personal belief is that unity of religion is very important.
 
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