Masturbation

[Mickey]

Hi,
Im not sure I get how this relates to masturbation?

I suppose the more accurate term would be “spilling or wasting seed”. Read the article–it is quite good.

 

[jbuck919]

I was in a substance abuse rehab program some years ago–I will openly admit that to you. I mean, what have I got to lose? And I might even be doing some help. The counselor pointed out that everyone is addicted to sex. Let me say that again: everyone is addicted to sex. The point is not to become obsessed by it.

Was that a Catholic thougth? Of course not. Celibacy and chaststy outside the context of matrimony is still the official Catholic teaching. Am I going to speak against it here? Of course not. But if God only let into heaven those who have been able to overcome the human hunger for sex, which is as strong as the hunger for food, and strictly enforced the kinds of rules that caused Origen to castrate himself, then heaven is indeed a very empty place.

 

[HailMary]

If you have been masturbating for 10 years of your life, it may take 10 years of constant work and confession to stop.

My advice? Go to Our Lady. She will clean you up. You may consider (but choose wisely) Total Consecration to Her.

 

[Vigis]

When I am about to give into such a sin I usually pray, engrave my findernails or some sharp object into my hand, or just flat out say no to myself and overcome it. I admit though that I have given in to such a sin when I have done one or many of these things. I would usually then pefrom self flagellation and that would make me think twice about giving into the sin when the temptation comes around again. God speed.

 

[wanner47]

Or a group of individuals.

And who decides which group is right? They can’t all be right, can they?

You would also have to accept that someone murdering you is acceptable then, and make sure you don’t tick anyone off at the same time. Could you live knowing that you may be on the revieving of a murder??

Why would I have to accept that? In my judgement, it’s all right for ME to murder, but it’s not all right for anyone else to murder. That’s what my conscience tells me. Who are you to tell me I’m wrong, if I can decide for myself what is right and what is wrong?

In a word, no. Nobody would think that preventing murder by the rule of law is oppressive.

I do [hypothetically]. And since I decide for myself what is right and what is wrong, who are you to tell me I’m wrong?

No, it is upholding everybody elses’ right not to be murdered.

But that same law is oppressing MY right to murder, because I think murder is right and I get to decide for myself what is right and what is wrong. Who are you to tell me that murder is wrong? You’re basing your belief that murder is wrong on an old and outdated moral code that was made my old men hundreds and hundreds of years ago.

They are elected by the people, it’s called democracy. Who elected the church???

Jesus; and after he ascended, the ones He entrusted His Church to.

That depends if you could live under anarchy or not.

If right and wrong is subjective, why is it wrong for everyone to follow their own moral code? And if anarchy results, well, at least everyone gets to follow their own beliefs without being repressed.

No it is not, laws can be modified to suit. Can sin?

But modified to suit whom? The laws that are modified to suit you might not suit me, and vice versa. How do we decide who gets to have the laws modified in their favor and who doesn’t? Either way, someone is being repressed.

The laws are in place to stop the minority of criminals and to protect the majority that are law abiding.

Who are you to decide who is a criminal or not? If I murder because I sincerely believe it is the right thing to do, why does that make me a criminal? I’m just following my own subjective belief system, and my own subjective beliefs of right and wrong.

If you follow the law you benefit from its protection.

That doesn’t stop me from being repressed. [Same concept with sin, though - if you follow God’s laws, you benefit spiritually.]

I took that for granted.

Well, you never know. It’s always wise to have a disclaimer!

 

[R_McGeddon]

And who decides which group is right? They can’t all be right, can they?

The group would be elected, I said this in my previous post.

Why would I have to accept that?
In my judgement, it’s all right for ME to murder, but it’s not all right for anyone else to murder. That’s what my conscience tells me.

You just would, if your conscience tells you it’s alright for you to murder, what makes you think that others won’t behave in the same way?

Who are you to tell me I’m wrong, if I can decide for myself what is right and what is wrong

You would be wrong if it was only you that decided that murder was right while everybody else thought the opposite.

I do [hypothetically]. And since I decide for myself what is right and what is wrong, who are you to tell me I’m wrong?

If you do then you must be prepared for others that think the same way.

But that same law is oppressing MY right to murder

You don’t have the right to murder.

because I think murder is right and I get to decide for myself what is right and what is wrong.

If you thought murder was right, your judgement would need calling into question.

Who are you to tell me that murder is wrong?

Someone that knows society functions better where murder is forbidden by law.

You’re basing your belief that murder is wrong on an old and outdated moral code that was made my old men hundreds and hundreds of years ago.

My knowledge that murder is wrong is based on a sound moral code that was in place long before the church came into existence.

Jesus; and after he ascended, the ones He entrusted His Church to.

One person setting up a church with twelve followers is not an elected organisation, besides the story of the son of God pre-dates the Jesus and christianity version by centuries. Jesus is just a regurgitated myth.

If right and wrong is subjective, why is it wrong for everyone to follow their own moral code? And if anarchy results, well, at least everyone gets to follow their own beliefs without being repressed.

You think everyone living their life exactly as they see fit, would not infringe on others in any way?

But modified to suit whom? The laws that are modified to suit you might not suit me, and vice versa. How do we decide who gets to have the laws modified in their favor and who doesn’t? Either way, someone is being repressed.

To suit society as a whole. People who think murder is ok must be repressed.

Who are you to decide who is a criminal or not? If I murder because I sincerely believe it is the right thing to do, why does that make me a criminal? I’m just following my own subjective belief system, and my own subjective beliefs of right and wrong.

Laws, not individuals, decide who is a criminal.

That doesn’t stop me from being repressed. [Same concept with sin, though - if you follow God’s laws, you benefit spiritually.]

I know, but as I’ve said, people must be repressed if they think murder is ok.

Well, you never know. It’s always wise to have a disclaimer!

 

[fmagill]

Hi. I have always been committed to waiting until marriage for sex, but I have struggled enormously with masturbation. I also, maybe in an attempt to justify my habit, seriously considered becoming a Protestant a few months ago. However, the more and more I learned, the more and more I realized that the Catholic Church is the “True Church,” if you will. Anyway, I have gone to Confession and talked to my priest about this and what he said was fascinating; he told me to first and foremost get it to the point where the masturbation doesn’t control me. Then suggested I exercise, eat properly, and get good rest. That struck me as interesting, because the only one of the those three things I do is exercise; I play football. But because of a tremendous amount of schoolwork I get 4-6 hours of sleep a night Mon-Fri. My eating habits are also less than stellar. So what he said really encouraged me; does anyone here have any other suggestions? How can I overcome this? My first instinct was just to stop–cold turkey, if you will; I last just a week, and then I couldn’t take it any longer. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Dear Brother in Christ:

Hang in there, take all the great advice you’ve received about looking to prayer, especially invoking the intercession of Our Lady and St. Michael, taking care of your body, and building up your self control, and keep talking to that priest, both in personal counseling and the Sacrament of Reconciliation.

I fell deeply into this particular sin as a young man, and was a slave to the habit for more than 35 years. To this day I struggle with it, but when I fall, I go to confession (BEFORE receiving the Eucharist!) and try my best not to fall again. Gradually, I am overcoming it. Think of Jesus carrying the Cross, how he fell and got up again and again and again. Following Him is not easy, but nothing worthwhile is easy–like getting in shape to play football, for example. But just as in football, hard work will be rewarded.

In addition to the Rosary and the Chaplet of the Divine Mercy and the other excellent prayers suggested in this thread, try this short “mini-exorcism” when you are feeling temptation: “Begone, Satan and his minions, you have no power here. By the power of the Lord Jesus Christ, I bind you to His Cross.” Then make the Sign of the Cross and say “Amen.” You may be as amazed as I was at how well this works.

Don’t be distracted by the posts that question whether this is a sin: the Catholic Church has always taught this, as did all the other Christian traditions until only recently. It does not have to be proscribed in Sacred Scripture to be a sin, whether Old or New Testament. It is part of Sacred Tradition and the “sense of the faithful”, both of which our Church recognizes as valid revelation of the Word of God. Above all, don’t be fooled by those who attempt to blame celibacy and chastity for pedophilia and other sexual crimes. Human nature is what it is, and that’s why we need Jesus and His Church to help us. To lay the blame for the criminal acts of fallen human beings on the very virtues that could prevent those acts is totally absurd.

When you defeat this temptation, you will be a better man, and a better husband, as one of the others already noted in this thread. Our society will continue to confront you daily with temptations of the flesh, but with Our Lord’s help you can and will prevail. Some day your wife and kids will also be the beneficiaries of your virtue, as will all your Brothers and Sisters in Christ, because mortal sin harms us all. Persevere in faith and love. I’ll pray for you, and ask you to pray for me, to be delivered from this sin.

Pax vobiscum.

 

[JimmyV]

Try the web site “True Knights” it has excellent information and practical, daily spiritual exercises you can use.

 

[Mikel12]

Pray to God always. Sometimes its not easy, but the best way to achieve something or overcome such a habbit is to keep on trying to avoid it. With prayer, you will overcome.

What a forum? Where have I been all my life? Its nice that I have found good catholics who will help me discuss so many things about our church.

 

[wanner47]

The group would be elected, I said this in my previous post.

I think you’re missing the point of my little exercise.

My point is: it can be argued that most countries use the concept of law to repress citizens. The majority gets to dictate how the minority live, instead of everyone doing whatever the heck they want. You agree that this is necessary, or anarchy would result.

It’s the same thing with God’s laws. The Pope and cardinals make laws, not to repress its citizens, but to make life better for everyone. If there were no laws, if God said, “Do whatever you want,” anarchy would result. That’s why the Israelites needed the Ten Commandments in the first place.

Sin is what happens when we disobey those laws. It’s not a tool used to oppress; it’s a natural consequence incurred by the individual.

 

[BrooklynBoy200]

Do you have to go to confession after masturbation? It’s not something that is very comfortable to talk about…

 

[Scottgun]

Do you have to go to confession after masturbation? It’s not something that is very comfortable to talk about…

One ought to. One might have diminished culpability, making it not a mortal sin, but because it is a grave wrong, one should certainly go. Don’t worry, the priest has heard it all many times.

 

[BrooklynBoy200]

One ought to. One might have diminished culpability, making it not a mortal sin, but because it is a grave wrong, one should certainly go. Don’t worry, the priest has heard it all many times.

What is diminished culpability? I don’t mean to sound stupid. Thanks.

 

[NotWorthy]

What is diminished culpability? I don’t mean to sound stupid. Thanks.

If you are addicted to masturbation, then each incidence of masturbation isn’t as bad a sin, as if you weren’t addicted and still doing it.

 

[BrooklynBoy200]

If you are addicted to masturbation, then each incidence of masturbation isn’t as bad a sin, as if you weren’t addicted and still doing it.

Okay thankyou. It is still a sin though right?

 

[Scottgun]

Okay thankyou. It is still a sin though right?

Yep. Your ignorance as to is gravity and the force of habit likely (and bear in mind I have no authority to declare that) reduced how much you were at fault.

BUT. You have just been instructed as to its gravity, and therefore are more responsible if you continue to commit the act. I will pray for you, and give a note of encouragement that you can conquer the habit and no longer be at the mercy of the impulse. To twist the Nike motto: Just don’t do it!

 

[BrooklynBoy200]

i’m sorry if i am being repetitive with my questions, but i want to be sure of this. If you masturbate, ask God for forgiveness in your own prayer without going to confession, then die, will you go to Hell? I didn’t have much Catholic teaching growing up so this might seem like common sense to you guys.
And thankyou Scottgun for the encouragement

 

[DARichards]

I think that this is a problem that all men have dealt with at one time of their life or another. For me, I didn’t find relief until I converted to the Catholic Church. Frequent Mass, monthly Confession, and frequent prayer have been the keys to keeping away from the tempations. Also limiting the quantity of television and internet has helped.

You must remember, you don’t ever get rid of a bad habit, you just simply replace it with a new one:thumbsup: As far as your question on going to hell if you masturbate and don’t go to confession, I think that much of the result of that question is unanswerable. In this proposed situation if you were to be smashed by a falling piano after the act, and you were let’s say on your way to confession, or if you had a true repentance of your sin, we would just trust in the Divine Mercy of our Lord. If on the other hand you had no repentance, or no sorrow for your sin and were in complete rebellion, that would put you in a much more culpable situation.

 

[NotWorthy]

i’m sorry if i am being repetitive with my questions, but i want to be sure of this. If you masturbate, ask God for forgiveness in your own prayer without going to confession, then die, will you go to Hell? I didn’t have much Catholic teaching growing up so this might seem like common sense to you guys.
And thankyou Scottgun for the encouragement

No one on this thread can authoritatively tell you yes or no on this question. The Church teaches that Christ can forgive you directly if you do a perfect act of contrition, but I’m not sure how easy that is. Why don’t you go to confession and KNOW that you are forgiven???

 

[BrownR]

Just out of curiosity… How many single Catholic men on here, who are not in an active sexual relationship, can honestly say that they “have a handle” so to speak on masturbation? I’ve seen several posts by men claiming to be free from the sin of masturbation, but I’m curious as to whether they are single or married. I would imagine that it would be much easier for a married man… I’ve just always been under the impression that this is an issue that all Catholic men struggle with and that all priests hear in confession on a regular basis. Am I wrong?