Most priests know far more about marriage than most married people do

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Edward_H said:
Gooiest? My confidence in you has just leaped by 400%!!
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We once spent 4 years living on a Jesuit college campus. I’ve heard a lot of Jesuit homilies.

Some Jesuits are great, but (again), they vary a lot, just as diocesan priests do.
 
No need to use male and female notions here; we’re above such paternalistic diminitions of humanoids.
 
I hope you two really hit it off in the Confessional. Maybe you should hear his Confession since he’s, as you put it, a “buttercup.”
 
Ask Him what God would think of his complaint.

That tends to toughen up even softies.
 
Xantippe said:
Right.

And presumably says more (and in more detail) to a brother or male friend than to his confessor.

I used the female example because it was the one I was most certain of the accuracy of, but if it’s also true that men confide in their brothers and male friends more than they confide in their confessor, then that supports my point as well.

I suspect that there’s minimal overlap between confidences to friends and siblings and confessions. It may be relating to the same issues, but it’s likely to be a different aspect of the problem. Also (based on confession line observations), there just isn’t time to go into a lot of depth in a typical confession. People are obviously mostly giving just the executive summary.
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The seal of confession and the discretion of priests, however, leads people to unearth things about themselves to priests that they would never tell anyone else in a million years. People tell their friends and families more things about themselves, but when it comes to the things people most fear being judged about or remembering against them and their character, a priest can be both far more easier to trust and yet also far more approachable.

I will say, however, that the older priests who pray a great deal know the most about what makes people tick and how to talk to them in a way that will soften the hardened or blinded heart or dejected heart. They have learned (probably the hard way) to let the Holy Spirit do all the heavy lifting, I suppose.
 
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Looks like you’re not quite ready for the Pepsi Challenge, soldier. 🍼
 
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Some things are caught, not taught. It’s hard to describe a taste accurately unless you have eaten the food. It is a mixture of education and experience.

God bless.
 
Eating and tasting…and the self gift involved in both Holy Orders and Holy Matrimony are very different.

You used a terrible comparison.
 
What do you want me to say then?

Priests do not marry nor they raise family. They have no real life practical experience.

You can be a football coach without being a player yourself, but it is better if you are.

There are many aspects of married life, which are just hearsay to a priest.

I don’t know but I know many priests who admit they do not have the knowledge of a married man to really teach on the dynamic of marriage.

It does not mean that they cannot give advice. And their spiritual (name removed by moderator)ut about the Sacrament itself is indeed very valuable.

In a marriage program, priests are very much an important part of the team. However, practical marriage topics are done by married lay people.

God bless.
 
That’s utter nonsense. Do you mean to say that priests were raised in test tubes, only had friends who were raised in test tubes?

I stand by my initial point that married people if they’re lucky know about exactly one marriage, their own.
 
Have you attended a marriage program?

Like Marriage Renewal Seminar or Marriage Enrichment Experience or Healing and Transformation in marriage?

These are some of the treasures about marriage life. Tell me if a priest can do all the topics in the module?
 
There’s also the question of parenting.

As we all know, parents don’t really want to hear parenting advice from non-parents.

Granted, non-parents can have experience and insights, but it’s very different from living with children all the time.
 
You make a good point about the fact that you don’t have to be married to know about marriage.

A priest’s perspective can be helpful for the reasons you layed out, just as an unmarried counselor’s perspective can be helpful.

Married people can also learn quite a lot from other married people who have been married longer.
 
And their parents, as priests do; and married friends; and if they are sincere about growing their sacrament journeying with other like minded couples to enrich their relationship. Or as I read your statement the couple travels alone in their relationship not learning how great it is destined to be.
 
If priests know so much about marriage, why do they have married lay people teaching all of the classes? Check any diocesan Pre-Cana calendar and it’s almost all lay people teaching.
 
Any person can sling PowerPoint charts. Don’t need a ring on one’s finger.

And being affiliated with such programs doesn’t mean one can help other persons grow in holiness which is the key to living marriage well.
 
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Apparently, lay people do the work constantly and with good results.
 
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