Must we forgive the unrepentant?

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Only if you wish to be forgiven as well. If you don’t care if you are forgiven for your many faults, then hey do as you wish. Remember we all have been unrepentant (or not quickly repentant) sinners ourselves.
Well, that’s a nice sanctimonious statement (and it happens to be what I have always believed) but the point here is that some very prominent Catholic apologists on Catholic Answers Live live have recently stated the opposite. What we need is to hear the BASIS for your point of view that they are wrong - from logic, Scripture, or documents of the Magisterium.

Peace.
 
Well, that’s a nice sanctimonious statement (and it happens to be what I have always believed) but the point here is that some very prominent Catholic apologists on Catholic Answers Live live have recently stated the opposite. What we need is to hear the BASIS for your point of view that they are wrong - from logic, Scripture, or documents of the Magisterium.

Peace.
I honestly think after reading this and that, that they are not using language in the same way the Church at large uses it.
I understand 100% what they are trying to say, but what they said last night does not coincide with how the Church seems to say it. It’s hard to find anything other than the mandate that we are to forgive no matter the disposition of the offender. And again, I think the problem is the confusion between forgiveness, and absolution, and a “free pass”, or tolerance of evil.

The idea the apologist presented as such:
“we cannot be expected to do what God does not do…” is a non-starter.
We cannot do anything God does in this area.
Justice doesn’t belong to us, absolution doesn’t belong to us, we do not justify one another, expiation and justification are the Lord’s power at work.

So, the statement doesn’t even apply to the question. It is clear though, that even though we cannot do the things God does through Christ, we are called to emulate him.

I think what the apologists are trying to express is a statement against cheap grace, or presumption, the idea that repentance is not needed to participate in God’s grace. This is a common erroneous idea now, that God simply gives us a pardon and doesn’t ask for a response. But that’s not the question we are dealing with here, and wasn’t the question they were asked on the radio last night.

Romano Guardiini has an excellent chapter in “The Lord” on this very issue. I think you can read it at googlebooks. He would not agree with what the apologists are saying (or the way they are saying it).
 
But Akin seemed to me to say that we are not even required offer forgiveness to the unrepentant. That’s an entirely different statement that I find hard to get a handle on.

Peace.
I struggle with this too, if we don’t forgive, this seems to imply we remain angry, and that would mean, we cannot love them as we love ourselves.
 
… God does not forgive the unrepentant.

What is the correct Catholic position? Can anyone shed more light on this?

Thanks.
God does forgive the unrepentant; He did so from the cross. The blessings of forgiveness are for the one who forgives.

When one commits an evil act against another, two souls are in the breach. The salvation of the transgressed is to forgive; the salvation of the transgressor is to repent.
 
God does forgive the unrepentant; He did so from the cross. The blessings of forgiveness are for the one who forgives.
I believe forgiveness for the unrepentant is offered, but it is not effected unless they repent.
*In effect, to become reconciled with God presupposes and includes detaching oneself consciously and with determination from the sin into which one has fallen. It presupposes and includes, therefore, doing penance in the fullest sense of the term: repenting… *(JPII, Reconciliatio et Paenitentia #13)
Not all is forgiven or Christ would not have said this:
*If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.” *(Jn 20:23)
Repentance is a requirement of forgiveness.*If another disciple sins, you must rebuke the offender, and if there is repentance, you must forgive. *(Lk 17:3)
We are required to forgive…if there is repentance.

Ender
 
(Lk 17:3)
[/INDENT]We are required to forgive…if there is repentance.

Ender

CCC #2862 The fifth petition begs God’s mercy for our offences, mercy which can penetrate our hearts only if we have learned to forgive our enemies, with the example and help of Christ.

Which act of forgiveness requires the greater charity: to forgive the unrepentant or to forgive the repentant? I think the former. One who repents, it seems to me, is no longer my enemy.

Sacramental forgiveness (Reconciliation with God and Church) has special requirements only for the transgressor who desires to be forgiven and regain friendship with God and community. There are no special requirements for the transgressed to forgive immediately and unconditionally.
 
I think God and the Church have set a model for forgiveness for us to follow. And repentance is key, though we forget it often. But you cannot walk into a confessional and say I’m not sorry and receive forgiveness. You just cant.
Psychologically speaking many times it is beneficial to us to forgive the unrepentant.
HOWEVER we must be careful with this type of theology because it can be very protestant. Our faith expands on binding and loosing and forgiveness. It is a sacrament so we focus on it and much is made of it. This is a subject we know a lot about as Catholics which is why it confounds me about the theology expressed on the boards with this subject.
So, lets look at this theologically. An innocent victim, a child, is sexually abused by an adult. The adult, then is not repentant, vows to do it again any time he gets the chance. Does this child have a moral obligation to forgive. Is the crime committed against the child then binding on the morality of the innocent? Many protestants say yes.
The famous Duggars (whom I have always liked) have a theology led by a man named Goddard. And it deals with abuse in a most disgusting and protestant manner that I think should be discussed here.
Here are a couple of handouts that the Goddard group uses with sexual abuse victims
recoveringgrace.org/media/Counseling_Sexual_Abuse-540x700.jpeg
You can see question 1 and 2 set up the idea that abuse of the body is the least important type of abuse. Question 4 blames the victim. Question 10 sets up the moral obligation of the victim to forgive the offender.
Then we have this
recoveringgrace.org/media/Lessons_From_Moral_Failures_in_a_Family1.pdf
Again, blaming the victim.

As Catholics we should be especially attentive to this type of situation given our scandals. And our theology should reflect that. The title of this thread is MUST we forgive the unrepentant. The answer is that many times it is healthier to do so, but no, you do not have to. Imagine a theology and God that holds a command to the innocent to be bound by a moral action (forgivenss) be the simple fact that they have been abused! Too outlandish? Too extreme an example? No, because this extreme is carried out in some protestant theology and in reality some Catholic theology too. God sets the process of forgiveness clearly in the way salvation history is set up. He shows that because sin against another damages the relationship of the people involved that repentance is a reciprocal part of that healing.
Lets not forget that Matthew points this out well in Chapter 5
…24leave your offering there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and present your offering. 25"Make friends quickly with your opponent at law while you are with him on the way, so that your opponent may not hand you over to the judge, and the judge to the officer, and you be thrown into prison. 26"Truly I say to you, you will not come out of there until you have paid up the last cent.
Clearly this shows that repentance and reconciliation is needed for forgiveness. Because God is clear here, without a setteling and repair of the relationship of the harmed parties there would be no forgiveness. It binds the offender to ask for mercy and the offended to be merciful. That is forgivenss.
Forgiveness without repentance is permission.!!!
 
I think God and the Church have set a model for forgiveness for us to follow. And repentance is key, though we forget it often. But you cannot walk into a confessional and say I’m not sorry and receive forgiveness. You just cant.
Psychologically speaking many times it is beneficial to us to forgive the unrepentant.
HOWEVER we must be careful with this type of theology because it can be very protestant. Our faith expands on binding and loosing and forgiveness. It is a sacrament so we focus on it and much is made of it. This is a subject we know a lot about as Catholics which is why it confounds me about the theology expressed on the boards with this subject.
So, lets look at this theologically. An innocent victim, a child, is sexually abused by an adult. The adult, then is not repentant, vows to do it again any time he gets the chance. Does this child have a moral obligation to forgive. Is the crime committed against the child then binding on the morality of the innocent? Many protestants say yes.
The famous Duggars (whom I have always liked) have a theology led by a man named Goddard. And it deals with abuse in a most disgusting and protestant manner that I think should be discussed here.
Here are a couple of handouts that the Goddard group uses with sexual abuse victims
recoveringgrace.org/media/Counseling_Sexual_Abuse-540x700.jpeg
You can see question 1 and 2 set up the idea that abuse of the body is the least important type of abuse. Question 4 blames the victim. Question 10 sets up the moral obligation of the victim to forgive the offender.
Then we have this
recoveringgrace.org/media/Lessons_From_Moral_Failures_in_a_Family1.pdf
Again, blaming the victim.

As Catholics we should be especially attentive to this type of situation given our scandals. And our theology should reflect that. The title of this thread is MUST we forgive the unrepentant. The answer is that many times it is healthier to do so, but no, you do not have to. Imagine a theology and God that holds a command to the innocent to be bound by a moral action (forgivenss) be the simple fact that they have been abused! Too outlandish? Too extreme an example? No, because this extreme is carried out in some protestant theology and in reality some Catholic theology too. God sets the process of forgiveness clearly in the way salvation history is set up. He shows that because sin against another damages the relationship of the people involved that repentance is a reciprocal part of that healing.
Lets not forget that Matthew points this out well in Chapter 5

Clearly this shows that repentance and reconciliation is needed for forgiveness. Because God is clear here, without a setteling and repair of the relationship of the harmed parties there would be no forgiveness. It binds the offender to ask for mercy and the offended to be merciful. That is forgivenss.
Forgiveness without repentance is permission.!!!
From Michelle Arnold
*
All we can know is that God requires us to forgive others as a condition of being forgiven our own sins (Matt. 6:12). He will forgive us in equal measure to the measure of forgiveness we give to others (Matt. 7:1–2). If he forgives us, we cannot be stingy with the forgiveness we grant others (Matt. 18:23–25).
In short, it is our duty as Christians to forgive to the fullest extent possible, and to trust God that he will apply that forgiveness to souls as he sees fit. If our forgiveness cannot help an impenitent person, perhaps God will use the graces merited by that forgiveness to soften another person’s hardened heart.
Forgiving in no way condones anyone’s behavior. I think in your theology is more protestant than many of us here. I was baffled by your comment that my thoughts on this issue were not Catholic as I learned this type of total forgiveness through my Catholic faith.

I don’t believe anyone here said anything about a victim taking on the sin of an abuser or that a victim in any way is responsible for their abuse. No one here said anything about forgiveness being permission.

God does not call us to keep people who harmed us in our lives. He does not tell us we need to allow ourselves be victimized over & over. God tells us we must love all, even those who harm us. Sometimes we just need to love them from a distance.

We can not know the hearts of people who have harmed us, we can’t know if they are repentant, we can only love, even the most unlovable people.

I’ve copied part of the answer Michelle Arnold gave. Read it carefully to fully understand. Bitterness/resentment/vengeance/hate and so on do nothing but put distance between ourselves and God. Our bitterness/resentment/vengeance/hate does nothing for the unrepentant, they don’t care how we may feel. But when we love them we feel better and we can get closer to God.
 
“Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us”

Forgiveness is ALWAYS something we MUST work through in order to find peace in our own souls. A deep peaceful sense of Forgiveness is not immediate. It can take a lot of time to truly feel as if we have forgiven someone. However, we are NOT bound to reconcile with people who will continue to abuse us. Many people have wrongly equated forgiveness with reconciliation. This is not accurate. We are not morally required to continue allowing ourselves to be abused.
 
Thanks again to all.

Think of it in a criminal context, involving a pardon for a crime. It seems there are two possibilities:

a) The governor simply pardons [forgives] the criminal without any conditions. The unilateral action of the governor accomplishes the pardon. The criminal simply walks out of prison. There is no requirement that he admit his wrongdoing, express remorse, or promise to avoid a life of crime in the future. It seems the only justification for this type of pardon would be that the man was innocent of the crime, or that he had been sentenced to too harsh of a punishment. That does not sound like the Catholic view of God’s forgiveness to me.

-OR-

b) The governor merely offers to pardon the criminal. The offer of pardon is conditioned on the criminal signing a confession, expressing remorse, and promising to do his best to avoid future crime. Unless and until the criminal takes the affirmative action of doing these things, there is no pardon. He remains in prison. So, he has not in fact been pardoned. He has only received an offer, with conditions.

Scenario b) is how I have always understood God’s forgiveness [or “pardon”] to work in Catholic theology. Perhaps I have been wrong, but it seems to be pretty basic “Catholicism 101” to me. That’s how the sacrament of Reconciliation works. There is no forgiveness / pardon / absolution / salvation without contrition and repentance of mortal sin.

Now, what does that mean for us in relation to our fellow man? Must we forgive him even if he is unrepentant? Must our offer forgiveness be unilateral and unconditional like “scenario a)” or can it be bilateral and conditional like “scenario b)”? Are we in fact being asked to be more merciful than God?

I guess I will just keep trying to forgive all offenses willingly, from my heart, and let God take it from there. But I do find this to be a serious intellectual conundrum.
 
Just to be clear, you are taking the position as a Catholic cleric that an innocent abuts person MUST forgive an I repeater abuser? Really!?
 
Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.

Yes this is clear. So let’s examine what this says.
“Forgive us our trespasses”. Here we ask God to forgive us. Our sins have damaged our relationship with God. We ask forgiveness. Step one asking step two repenting. As has already been established we must repent or God will not forgive. We cannot walk into the confessional and not be sorry and not ask for forgiveness and still be forgiven.
“As we forgive those who trespass against us.” This asks us to mirror gods mercy. To have an abundance of it.
So let’s still use sexual abuse if a minor here.
What is the victim asking? To be forgiven of trespasses. What is the condition? Repentance and asking.
So we are praying that God forgives us like we forgive others. We are not praying that God forgives our unrepented abuse of the innocent like we forgive unrepented abuse of the innocent.
Sin is really just a relationship destroyer. We are called to be in relationship with God and with our fellow man. Relationship is a reciprocal entity. We do something and the other party (God or man) does something in return. Sin destroys that. Forgiveness restores it! So to forgive an unrepentant does not restore relationship because the unrepentant are it reciprocating in the relationship…

So yes, God, forgive my trespasses in the same way I show justice and mercy.
This becomes even clearer if we substitute specific sins for trespasses.
Forgive my striking my brother as I forgive him for striking me. Relationship restored.
But now try this
I’m not asking for you or governess God because that jerk deserved it and I’ll do it again the next time I See him. Judge us the same.

Now try this and you will see the error of the Goddard baptist view.
“Forgive the innocent for tempting me and causing me to do what I did which was justified.”

The proper parallel in the Lord’s Prayer for the sin of sexual abuse or other sins would be this.
“Forgive my molesting as I have forgiven my molester”. This implies repentance sorrow and mercy.
 
Sorry, I phone…

I think you are confusing non forgiveness with harboring ill will. A thirst for justice is not harboring ill will a refusal to forgive an unrepentant and asking God to judge them is not ill will.

Someone abused by say an unrepentant Catholic priest does not have a moral obligation to “forgive” them, they only have the obligation to be judged by the same standard.
I think what is getting lost here is the absolute necessity for repentance when we sin. That is the precursor to forgiveness which restores relationship. We cannot restore relationship with God without it so how could we restore relationship with eachother without it.

One more time.
A sin happens. In this case sexual abuse of an innocent. Relationship is destroyed between God and man AND man and man. To be forgiven the sinner must repent and ask for forgiveness. They must at least have remorse. Or God will not forgive. IF the abuser or any sinner really, asks for forgiveness and repents. A Christian is OBLIGATED to extend forgiveness and mercy. Just the same way God does. If they do not, then it is not right to expect God to show them mercy when they sin. BUT the obligation to restore relationship is not there without the relation or reciprocal part is not met. So with an unrepentant sinner the victim is NOT obligated to forgive because they are not being asked to…
 
Thanks again to all.

Think of it in a criminal context, involving a pardon for a crime. It seems there are two possibilities:

a) The governor simply pardons [forgives] the criminal without any conditions. The unilateral action of the governor accomplishes the pardon. The criminal simply walks out of prison. There is no requirement that he admit his wrongdoing, express remorse, or promise to avoid a life of crime in the future. It seems the only justification for this type of pardon would be that the man was innocent of the crime, or that he had been sentenced to too harsh of a punishment. That does not sound like the Catholic view of God’s forgiveness to me.

-OR-

b) The governor merely offers to pardon the criminal. The offer of pardon is conditioned on the criminal signing a confession, expressing remorse, and promising to do his best to avoid future crime. Unless and until the criminal takes the affirmative action of doing these things, there is no pardon. He remains in prison. So, he has not in fact been pardoned. He has only received an offer, with conditions.

Scenario b) is how I have always understood God’s forgiveness [or “pardon”] to work in Catholic theology. Perhaps I have been wrong, but it seems to be pretty basic “Catholicism 101” to me. That’s how the sacrament of Reconciliation works. There is no forgiveness / pardon / absolution / salvation without contrition and repentance of mortal sin.

Now, what does that mean for us in relation to our fellow man? Must we forgive him even if he is unrepentant? Must our offer forgiveness be unilateral and unconditional like “scenario a)” or can it be bilateral and conditional like “scenario b)”? Are we in fact being asked to be more merciful than God?

I guess I will just keep trying to forgive all offenses willingly, from my heart, and let God take it from there. But I do find this to be a serious intellectual conundrum.
Ah yes your two scenarios are perfect! A judge would not be just with the first but with the second the judge would be merciful.

Some are arguing that well, yes, God is the judge and we do not have that power so in our lives we must just open the doors of the jail to all regardless of sorrow or responsibility because our justice and mercy could never be as perfect as God’s and in a way that is true, it can’t be as perfect as God. But we are called to model it. To follow the outline of mercy and justice that God has given us. It permeates our church. Neverending mercy, and perfect justice. That is the entirety of the idea of reconciliation. The model is clear, repentance is key.
 
Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.

Yes this is clear. So let’s examine what this says.
“Forgive us our trespasses”. Here we ask God to forgive us. Our sins have damaged our relationship with God. We ask forgiveness. Step one asking step two repenting. As has already been established we must repent or God will not forgive. We cannot walk into the confessional and not be sorry and not ask for forgiveness and still be forgiven.
“As we forgive those who trespass against us.” This asks us to mirror gods mercy. To have an abundance of it.
So let’s still use sexual abuse if a minor here.
What is the victim asking? To be forgiven of trespasses. What is the condition? Repentance and asking.
So we are praying that God forgives us like we forgive others. We are not praying that God forgives our unrepented abuse of the innocent like we forgive unrepented abuse of the innocent.
Sin is really just a relationship destroyer. We are called to be in relationship with God and with our fellow man. Relationship is a reciprocal entity. We do something and the other party (God or man) does something in return. Sin destroys that. Forgiveness restores it! So to forgive an unrepentant does not restore relationship because the unrepentant are it reciprocating in the relationship…

So yes, God, forgive my trespasses in the same way I show justice and mercy.
This becomes even clearer if we substitute specific sins for trespasses.
Forgive my striking my brother as I forgive him for striking me. Relationship restored.
But now try this
I’m not asking for you or governess God because that jerk deserved it and I’ll do it again the next time I See him. Judge us the same.

Now try this and you will see the error of the Goddard baptist view.
“Forgive the innocent for tempting me and causing me to do what I did which was justified.”

The proper parallel in the Lord’s Prayer for the sin of sexual abuse or other sins would be this.
“Forgive my molesting as I have forgiven my molester”. This implies repentance sorrow and mercy.
I’m at a loss as to why you are having so much difficulty with this. Forgiveness is not the same thing as giving someone a free pass. What I believe is hanging you up is the idea that a victim of sexual abuse can or should forgive the person who abused them and that somehow the victim bears responsibility of the abuse. That is in no way what is being said.

Let’s take a 10 year girl who is molested by Uncle Creepy for two years. She is finally able to disclose this to her parents and they take appropriate action. Parents and child are Catholic and after sometime spent in prayer/counseling/spiritual direction…they are able to forgive Uncle Creepy.

Parents and little girl in no way excuse what Uncle Creepy did. They in no way allow him access to this little girl or any other child within their power to do so. They don’t keep his behavior to be a secret from others who need protection from him. They allow the law to take it’s course for Uncle Creepy. Parents & little girl do not take on blame for what Uncle Creepy did. They do not feel the need to tell Uncle Creepy they forgive him. They cut all ties with Uncle Creepy and have zero plans to being in the same space as him. They leave the judgement of Uncle Creepy to God.

God will judge parents and little girl according to their lives and He will judge Uncle Creepy according to his. Parents and little girl’s judgement is not dependent on Uncle Creepy’s repentance or lack thereof.
 
Deacon - I’d like your take on the analysis I set forth below. Thanks.

Think of it in a criminal context, involving a pardon for a crime. It seems there are two possibilities:

a) The governor simply pardons [forgives] the criminal without any conditions. The unilateral action of the governor accomplishes the pardon. The criminal simply walks out of prison. There is no requirement that he admit his wrongdoing, express remorse, or promise to avoid a life of crime in the future. It seems the only justification for this type of pardon would be that the man was innocent of the crime, or that he had been sentenced to too harsh of a punishment. That does not sound like the Catholic view of God’s forgiveness to me.

-OR-

b) The governor merely offers to pardon the criminal. The offer of pardon is conditioned on the criminal signing a confession, expressing remorse, and promising to do his best to avoid future crime. Unless and until the criminal takes the affirmative action of doing these things, there is no pardon. He remains in prison. So, he has not in fact been pardoned. He has only received an offer, with conditions.

Scenario b) is how I have always understood God’s forgiveness [or “pardon”] to work in Catholic theology. Perhaps I have been wrong, but it seems to be pretty basic “Catholicism 101” to me. That’s how the sacrament of Reconciliation works. There is no forgiveness / pardon / absolution / salvation without contrition and repentance of mortal sin.

Now, what does that mean for us in relation to our fellow man? Must we forgive him even if he is unrepentant? Must our offer forgiveness be unilateral and unconditional like “scenario a)” or can it be bilateral and conditional like “scenario b)”? Are we in fact being asked to be more merciful than God?

I guess I will just keep trying to forgive all offenses willingly, from my heart, and let God take it from there. But I do find this to be a serious intellectual conundrum.
 
Sorry, I phone…

I think you are confusing non forgiveness with harboring ill will. A thirst for justice is not harboring ill will a refusal to forgive an unrepentant and asking God to judge them is not ill will.

Someone abused by say an unrepentant Catholic priest does not have a moral obligation to “forgive” them, they only have the obligation to be judged by the same standard.
I think what is getting lost here is the absolute necessity for repentance when we sin. That is the precursor to forgiveness which restores relationship. We cannot restore relationship with God without it so how could we restore relationship with eachother without it.

One more time.
A sin happens. In this case sexual abuse of an innocent. Relationship is destroyed between God and man AND man and man. To be forgiven the sinner must repent and ask for forgiveness. They must at least have remorse. Or God will not forgive. IF the abuser or any sinner really, asks for forgiveness and repents. A Christian is OBLIGATED to extend forgiveness and mercy. Just the same way God does. If they do not, then it is not right to expect God to show them mercy when they sin. BUT the obligation to restore relationship is not there without the relation or reciprocal part is not met. So with an unrepentant sinner the victim is NOT obligated to forgive because they are not being asked to…
This is not Catholic theology at all. Restoration of a relationship with fellow man is not a requirement for forgiveness.
 
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