My sister is having an abortion

[freiabereinsam]

Time is against you, OP, and it is running fast. I urge you to man up and try being strict. While I cannot guarantee that it will work (it might even backfire), I am convinced that it is your only–and last!–chance. It is clear that your soft side is not persuading her. If you are reluctant to do so, remember that a life (sister’s child) and a soul (sister) are on the line.

 

[ffg]

Unfortunately, that’s not always the case. If it were, there wouldn’t be so many estranged families, abusive families, and people who have had falling outs over far less.

My family loves unconditionally, but I could never presume that a perfect stranger is as lucky as I am.

Giving advice based on exceptions to a norm as foundational is detrimental.

Not presuming a stranger is in your situation is one thing, giving advice that is contrary to the foundation of society is another.

The family for what it is, is a much better bet in any case, than assuming the family are terrorists. This is exactly what PP docs and ‘nurses’ say - ‘your parents will hate you for this, you better abort’.

This is never a truth, even with sinful parents. - It is a sales pitch though.

 

[BlueEyedLady]

Giving advice based on exceptions to a norm as foundational is detrimental.

Not presuming a stranger is in your situation is one thing, giving advice that is contrary to the foundation of society is another.

The family for what it is, is a much better bet in any case, than assuming the family are terrorists. This is exactly what PP docs and ‘nurses’ say - ‘your parents will hate you for this, you better abort’.

This is never a truth, even with sinful parents. - It is a sales pitch though.

It is not uncommon for parents to turn their backs on their children for any number of reasons. The OP knows his family better than you do, and unfortunately, he is sure that they mean what they say when they say they would be done with his sister if she got pregnant.

It is wrong to presume that he does not know his family, that he is wrong, and that their hearts will open up. There really is no reason to believe that that is the case.

 

[tobbias88]

There are hundreds - nay thousands - of couples looking for white babies ( which I guess hers will be).
She never needs to see it. She can leave it in the hospital, leave it in an orphanage. But she doesn’t have to kill it. If she does she will regret this until the day she dies. A mother never forgets altho she may pretend it is ‘all over’. It is never all over until she faces her child at the Throne of God and it asks:
‘Mummy why did you not let me live? Did I do something wrong? I have waited for you in Paradise but now you must leave us for all eternity…’
Life is so short - this woman will be dead in a few short years…50…60 at most. Was it worth it? Could she kill her pet kitten? Then how can she kill her baby? Pray for the child but pray that this wretched woman will avoid eternal damnation.

 

[aloe]

Prayers to you for the life of your niece or nephew. Their very life literally hangs in the balance. I think a letter is a great idea. Keep communication lines open. And feel free to print off literature on any site that really hits home to add to your letter.

 

[SpidersfromMars]

Woops, double post

 

[SpidersfromMars]

There are hundreds - nay thousands - of couples looking for white babies ( which I guess hers will be).
She never needs to see it. She can leave it in the hospital, leave it in an orphanage. But she doesn’t have to kill it. If she does she will regret this until the day she dies. A mother never forgets altho she may pretend it is ‘all over’. It is never all over until she faces her child at the Throne of God and it asks:
‘Mummy why did you not let me live? Did I do something wrong? I have waited for you in Paradise but now you must leave us for all eternity…’
Life is so short - this woman will be dead in a few short years…50…60 at most. Was it worth it? Could she kill her pet kitten? Then how can she kill her baby? Pray for the child but pray that this wretched woman will avoid eternal damnation.

What if it’s not a white baby? Takes two to make a baby and we don’t know anything about the father’s background. Unfortunately ethnic children have lower adoption rates, so let’s keep that in mind when claiming there’s a multitude of adopters standing by.

I think many people would consider killing a kitten worse because it’s conscious and aware. Many argue that because a small embryo/fetus is not conscious and aware of its impending mortality, it doesn’t matter. “You don’t remember anything before you’re born, you wouldn’t have known if you’d died in the womb.” Something along those lines

 

[bben15]

Long story short… my sister, who is 21, unmarried and with no job got pregnant. She told me and asked for my support, which I readily gave as I love my sister. At first she was thinking of keeping the baby, but now she’s set on having an abortion. She thinks that she won’t be able to give the child a proper start in life, and also, the father wants nothing to do with the child. My sister is sure that she wants an abortion - she has talked to crisis pregnancy counsellors and everything. The date for the abortion is next week.

As I said, I love and adore my sister, and I want to support her in everything she does. But I’m also pro-life, which my sister knows.

What do I do? Is there anything I can do? What should I say to my sister? I’m at a loss as to what to say because on one hand, I want to support her and love her, and on the other hand, I don’t want her to do anything which she might regret.

Remind her that if she has an abortion, she is excommunicated. Adoption, not abortion.

 

[TK421]

Hail Mary, full of grace.
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou amongst women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God,
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.

 

[SpidersfromMars]

Remind her that if she has an abortion, she is excommunicated. Adoption, not abortion.

The sister’s not Catholic so unfortunately that wouldn’t mean much to her.

 

[bben15]

The sister’s not Catholic so unfortunately that wouldn’t mean much to her.

That is unfortunate. I guess all we can do is pray.

 

[Cojuanco]

The most illogical thing to do, as taught today by your local public school system.

Parents and family love unconditionally, even when their emotions are shock, awe or anger.

Emotions change and soon will be filled with joy of new life.

Uh, you did read the part about how they would likely support the abortion? I would not tell them.

Sometimes it comes down to praying for the mother and the child, and forgiving them. I mean, when all options are exhausted, that’s all you can do.

 

[Evania]

That may be difficult, the OP has already said that his sister thinks he wouldn’t want anything to do with it and the OP also said that he doesn’t know the guy.

Should he try to track him down and talk to him, I want to add that he should be very careful. If he doesn’t know this guy he doesn’t know if he’s abusive, cruel, a potential stalker or harasser, etc. He could very well be putting his sister in harm’s way if there’s a reason that she doesn’t want the father to know and he goes behind her back to tell him. Caution is advised here.

Dear BlueEyedLady,

I sincerely mean no disrespect, and you have shared some really great advice. All of us are trying to get the OP to see things from another perspective and time is of the essence.
Let’s not argue against each other’s posts, ideas, and insights. We all would love to see this little one saved and we’re all offering advice with that goal in sight.

Let’s all merely state our advice and let the OP decide for themselves what advice to prayerfully take to heart or discard, as only they know what would apply to their situation.

 

[JMatthewA]

Long story short… my sister, who is 21, unmarried and with no job got pregnant. She told me and asked for my support, which I readily gave as I love my sister. At first she was thinking of keeping the baby, but now she’s set on having an abortion. She thinks that she won’t be able to give the child a proper start in life, and also, the father wants nothing to do with the child. My sister is sure that she wants an abortion - she has talked to crisis pregnancy counsellors and everything. The date for the abortion is next week.

As I said, I love and adore my sister, and I want to support her in everything she does. But I’m also pro-life, which my sister knows.

What do I do? Is there anything I can do? What should I say to my sister? I’m at a loss as to what to say because on one hand, I want to support her and love her, and on the other hand, I don’t want her to do anything which she might regret.

Is she religious enough to care that Catholic Church universal law excommunicates people who have abortions? Church law also excommunicates people who directly support by money or moral support or driving them to the abortion clinic someone who has an abortion if the women actually goes through with the abortion. People that are sincerely sorry that they have murdered the baby can easily return to the Catholic Church after talking to a priest since most priests have been given the power to remove excommunication from their bishop IF the person is sorry.

For more info see ewtn.com/expert/answers/abortio2.htm

 

[CaliLobo]

Long story short… my sister, who is 21, unmarried and with no job got pregnant. She told me and asked for my support, which I readily gave as I love my sister. At first she was thinking of keeping the baby, but now she’s set on having an abortion. She thinks that she won’t be able to give the child a proper start in life, and also, the father wants nothing to do with the child. My sister is sure that she wants an abortion - she has talked to crisis pregnancy counsellors and everything. The date for the abortion is next week.

As I said, I love and adore my sister, and I want to support her in everything she does. But I’m also pro-life, which my sister knows.

What do I do? Is there anything I can do? What should I say to my sister? I’m at a loss as to what to say because on one hand, I want to support her and love her, and on the other hand, I don’t want her to do anything which she might regret.

I have Christlike compassion for your sister and that is why I support her decision. It must have been a difficult decision to come down with.

No woman should have to suffer through the pain of an unwanted pregnancy, and the burden of supporting a baby that she cannot support.

No one should meddle with a woman’s uterus. No one. Not any government or church.

 

[Evania]

I have Christlike compassion for your sister and that is why I support her decision. It must have been a difficult decision to come down with.

No woman should have to suffer through the pain of an unwanted pregnancy, and the burden of supporting a baby that she cannot support.

No one should meddle with a woman’s uterus. No one. Not any government or church.

That should include the abortion practitioner too, no?

How can you say you’re “Christ-like” and yet sanction the killing of another human being?

 

[CaliLobo]

That should include the abortion practitioner too, no?

How can you say you’re “Christ-like” and yet sanction the killing of another human being?

The abortion practitioner isn’t needing compassion in this situation.

God has killed many people in the OT. There are times when killing is sanctioned. The Bible says you shall not “murder”, not “kill”. Furthermore, the Bible might say that God knew us since we were in the womb, but what does that have to do with abortion??

Christ would have compassion for women. He would not women to suffer through unwanted pregnancy. It is evil to force women to go through unwanted pregnancies.

Women are smart enough to make their own reproductive health choices. The government and the church do not need to step in.

 

[His_angel]

The abortion practitioner isn’t needing compassion in this situation.

God has killed many people in the OT. There are times when killing is sanctioned. The Bible says you shall not “murder”, not “kill”. Furthermore, the Bible might say that God knew us since we were in the womb, but what does that have to do with abortion??

Christ would have compassion for women. He would not women to suffer through unwanted pregnancy. It is evil to force women to go through unwanted pregnancies.

Women are smart enough to make their own reproductive health choices. The government and the church do not need to step in.

To murder is to kill the innocent. I cannot think of anything more innocent than an unborn child.

Many women suffer depression after the birth of their child, some have committed infanticide. While we should be compassionate, their actions are not acceptable or moral because of the compassion. Neither is an abortion. Her reproductive choice was to have sex, maybe with contraception. She can not undo a child.

Jesus told the woman caught in adultery to go and sin no more. Not ‘go and sin all you want.’

If we allow everyone to do as they please, without regard to other people, there is anarchy.

And frankly abortion isn’t even a religious discussion. It’s biological. It’s a life, it’s human. That’s all. It grows, maintains homeostasis, takes in nutrients, expels waste, has a heartbeat and brain activity. It is not subhuman, or a blotch.

 

[Evania]

The abortion practitioner isn’t needing compassion in this situation.

God has killed many people in the OT. There are times when killing is sanctioned. The Bible says you shall not “murder”, not “kill”. Furthermore, the Bible might say that God knew us since we were in the womb, but what does that have to do with abortion??

Christ would have compassion for women. He would not women to suffer through unwanted pregnancy. It is evil to force women to go through unwanted pregnancies.

Women are smart enough to make their own reproductive health choices. The government and the church do not need to step in.

You said that “no one should meddle in a woman’s uterus.” I believe that your advice should apply to abortion practitioner’s with their instruments of death.
Certainly, Christ had compassion on women. You say that Christ wouldn’t want women to “suffer” through an unwanted pregnancy. Please back up your claim and show me where in the Bible He stated this sentiment. Thank you in advance.

While you’re at it, could you also kindly show us the verse where he randomly sends out children that He didn’t intend to be born? Thank you again.

I absolutely agree with you that a woman is smart enough to make her own reproductive choices. I’m assuming that most smart women know how pregnancies happen, so I absolutely agree that they should exercise God’s plan in regards to exercising restraint so an innocent party doesn’t have to be killed. After all, a woman’s “right” to engage in illicit sexual relations is somehow more important than an already existing human being’s right to live, right?

 

[Hicup]

Oddly enough, my sister is religious. Not in the sense that she follows the church’s teachings completely (for example, she is pro gay marriage), but she DOES try to say a prayer every day. Also, a few days ago she commented sadly to me in regards to the abortion, “I guess this means I’ll never be welcome in a church again.” So maybe the idea of her being excommunicated will have an effect on her, but again maybe not.