Not dating thread

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Also not dating.

I’m seriously considering the Priesthood though :newidea: (At least for the last two weeks I’ve started discerning). I’m not sure if that counts.

EDIT:
I would also like to add that I can’t find a single girl who’s looking for a devout Catholic male. As cliche as it seems, they just don’t seem to exist in real life. All of the solid Catholic girls I know seem to be dating outside the church…
Awesome! I’ll keep you in my prayers as you discern the religious vocation - that’s great news!!

That’s too bad - it is so ironic that the guys post about not finding any solid Catholic girls and the girls post about not being able to find any solid Catholic guys šŸ™‚ You’d think everyone would run into each other! šŸ˜›
 
I think some of the best relationships happen when you aren’t actively dating or seeking them out. I know that for my personal experience, I was not dating. I honestly expected to have a single life, but I will admit that I wanted more. I wanted to be a wife, I wanted to be a mom, but I was resigned to the idea that it might not be in store for me. I wasn’t even looking. I met a great man totally by chance, and the rest is history.

I love being married. I love love love being a mom and being a wife. But sometimes, when its been a particularly long and trying day, I secretly miss having the bed to myself and sleeping on the diagonal. šŸ˜‰ šŸ‘

Keep your heart and your mind open to the Spirit that moves us. Doing this is all that matters. The rest will fall into place as it should.
 
I think some of the best relationships happen when you aren’t actively dating or seeking them out. I know that for my personal experience, I was not dating. I honestly expected to have a single life, but I will admit that I wanted more. I wanted to be a wife, I wanted to be a mom, but I was resigned to the idea that it might not be in store for me. I wasn’t even looking. I met a great man totally by chance, and the rest is history.

I love being married. I love love love being a mom and being a wife. But sometimes, when its been a particularly long and trying day, *I secretly miss having the bed to myself and sleeping on the diagonal. *šŸ˜‰ šŸ‘

Keep your heart and your mind open to the Spirit that moves us. Doing this is all that matters. The rest will fall into place as it should.
Too funny! I think we all feel that way at one point or another. šŸ˜›

Neither of my teens is dating and I am not rushing them to start. I think the advice about moving forward with your own life and not pining or dating whoever out of habit or desperation is spot on.

Most people talk about meeting their spouse in the course of their normal life - at school, at work, at church. Among my old married friends, I don’t know anyone who met their spouse at a bar, club, or blind date. Among the more recently marrieds I know, none has met their spouse through online dating sites (or bars or clubs).

And of course, being single is not a curse. šŸ˜‰ Even if you never take the step of being formally consecrated as a lay single, there is still grace available to the single person.
 
You can add me to the list:D I’ve quit dating – at least the on-line scene. I know there are success stories with online dating, but that just doesn’t seem to be the case with most people I know (it also could be that I’m not in a huge metropolitan area so the pool in my area is smaller – read non-existent). Plus I’m through with long-distance relationships period. I get tired of meeting someone I think might have potential and then they drop off the face of the earth.

God’s going to have to bring him into my path the good old-fashioned way 😃
 
I want in my head to get married, but I’m beginning to wonder if I only want it because it’s the proper thing, socially speaking. I’m very happy, though, despite going through the hardest time of my life this year with family/personal issues and LOADs of growing up. šŸ™‚
Sometimes I feel the same
 
I gave up dating so that I could focus more on my relationship with the Lord. Dating just seemed so artificial to me and laden with spiritual traps. After about a year, I met a man at Church who became my friend, courted briefly, became engaged and married. All within 9 months. And once we’ve been married another 10 months following that, our first child will have been born.

Everything in God’s time. Which can be fast or slow!
Congrats šŸ‘
 
The dating game is a recipe for male humiliation; I gave it up years ago.

ICXC NIKA
 
The dating game is a recipe for male humiliation; I gave it up years ago.

ICXC NIKA
Is it evil that this post made me break out into a little chuckle? :o I don’t know why it did. Yeah dating can be harder on the guys, I know that’s true.
 
In antiquity, I should have given up dating before I started. However, God has graced us all with the ability to learn from our mistakes in life, and gain virtue from those experiences. After reading up a bit on JPII’s TOB as well as a few Christian/Catholic dating books, I decided to kick the habit.

I refrained from dating unintentionally the last semester of my junior year of high school, and my entire senior year of high school. The ā€œrevelationā€ happened midway through my freshman year in college, and I’m currently a sophomore & have yet to go on a ā€œdateā€.

I find that the majority of people who’ve inquired about the decision have been shocked & bewildered by the idea of NOT dating in todays society. However, as many as there are that are confused by the idea, there are an equal amount of people who respect the decision & are in favor of it.

With that being said, vocationally speaking, now that I feel I have begun to understand God’s will for my life, I am currently pondering whether or not it is contemptuous to continue to abstain from dating. If we are made aware of our vocational calling in accordance to God’s will, is it self-centered of us not to pursue what God has called us to do?
 
I tried online dating for a little while, and it just felt…wrong. I felt more like a commodity, or product, for the gals to just peruse over than anything else. I’m sure a bunch of gals have felt the same way.
 
I gave up dating after a really bad marraige. I figured I don’t know how to pick one, and anyway I was very determined to be happy being alone. That would be my whole aim. God would have knock me over and make it quite plain this was His will for me to marry again, if it even ever was. But I would assume not! Particularly now, with my child still in high school. After that, maybe convent life would be God’s call. And I did become quite content alone. And I felt quite well, too. Though last year, quite unexpectedly, God called me to a healing for spiritual wholeness.

It was immediately after that I think I must have taken a nap in the woods and that bumbling Puck must have come along and mistakenly put his potion in my eyes and when I awoke I saw this man and became completely and totally stuck forever. Yes, it worked something just like that! It must be what happened! It was instant and complete! And above all, not in my plans!

I tried not taking communion that first week, because I was ashamed of my obsessing, particularly when God had just done a great work in me, and I had not had made time to confess it. But at Mass, where I expected to feel the brunt of God’s dissatisfaction for my ungrateful ways, He instead filled me with His love, His peace, and His affirming comfort.

That was almost a year ago. Everything changed. We are both seeking annulments that should go through. And meanwhile we are both working towards doing practical things to merge our lives when that does happen. (One might argue I should not presume, however, its sort of like when you are expecting. Best to just expect a healthy baby, and deal with ā€œelseā€ when that happens, if it does, with the grace of God).

I never knew it was possible to so much enjoy the company of another. We think every single thing each other says is extremely interesting! And really, its just regular stuff. To us, its like lifeblood. It really feels a match made in Heaven.

So I really recommend Not Dating. šŸ™‚
 
I decided not to date when I realized that relationships with guys at this point in my life (senior in higschool) could really mess with my emotions and disconnect me from fully listening to God at this pivitol point in my life, vocation-wise.

Waiting on His timing - still not completly sure He’s calling me to marriage - though I do feel a tendency towards that particlur vocation. Keeping all of you guys and gals in my prayers - would you do the same for me?

Thanks so much and God bless you all,

Chloe M.
 
Marriage is a vocation, so it is going to be hard work (not that I know, right now I am in the season of seperation, trying to discern God’s will for my life as a senior in higschool). But nothing that comes easy is usually worth the effort. ** The beauty of marriage is that, from a girl’s perspective, you take a man’s flawed heart in your hands, and you let him see all the flaws in yours, and as a couple you work with God to guide each other’s souls to Heaven.
**
Easy task? No. Worth it? Yes! 😃
I wanted to say, I love the way you put that. With that much understanding of the responsibility of marriage, when you do find that special man, you two are going to have a wonderful union. All the best! (You are wise to stop looking as a senior in HS - in no way are you ready for that kind of search.)
 
I honestly feel I’ll give up dating for at least one year. I’ll focus on knowing people and making friends instead.

For years I’ve thought that marriage was my vocation. Now I’m beginning to doubt it.
 
I tend to limit my dating choices to real life ones, since I’ve failed many times in online dating.
 
I tried online dating for a little while, and it just felt…wrong. I felt more like a commodity, or product, for the gals to just peruse over than anything else. I’m sure a bunch of gals have felt the same way.
Yes it goes both ways. It seems like a lot of people just want to dabble or window shop. That’s fine but when someone just disappears without a goodbye or farewell that causes some hurt feelings. I never took it seriously but some really do.
 
SIngleness can be a blessing whether for a period of time or for a life time if that is what you are called to do. I didn’t date until college and didn’t date a whole lot until I met my husband. I dated maybe a total of three years of my life. Well, I guess that isn’t entirely true since I still date my husband. By the by, I really don’t like how some in this thread are bashing marriage. It may not be right for you, but don’t mock what is other people’s calling from God or say it isn’t worth the challenge that devalues my husband and I’s marriage which is very important to me and is a sacrament.
 
I want marriage but I’m not going to do it via online. I’ve had enough of that. The biggest problem with online dating, is that you spend so much time conversing online that you feel they are a really great match, then you meet them and you are back at square one…but you already know stuff about each other so there really isn’t much to talk about.

Frankly I really don’t understand how these ā€œsuccessful online marriagesā€ came into being.

I haven’t dated in awhile and that’s frankly because my schedule and cash flow makes it difficult to do so. I might date again, just cause I do enjoy having someone else’s company, and it’s good to do stuff with other people.
 
I want marriage but I’m not going to do it via online. I’ve had enough of that. The biggest problem with online dating, is that you spend so much time conversing online that you feel they are a really great match, then you meet them and you are back at square one…but you already know stuff about each other so there really isn’t much to talk about.

Frankly I really don’t understand how these ā€œsuccessful online marriagesā€ came into being.
^Story of my life. :3
 
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