Older? Catholic? Looking for a husband or wife?

[ElyseTaylor]

I agree. And I feel you on the suicidal thoughts…but God wants us to give this suffering to him in expiation of sins.

But I agree with you if would Really help if there was Some kind of ministry for us. We tend to get lost in the crowd and forgotten about until we can join the ranks of the married people. And plenty of people want to ask why like it’s your own fault, but being Catholic there aren’t a lot of local options. Especially not without a little help. But it can be embarrassing to get the word out that you would like assistance. I am right there with you!!

I tried a catholic dating website, but I got so overwhelmed by multiple messages fired off back to back before I could even Read them that it really creeped me out. That kind of behavior is super common among narcissists with low self-esteem (pushing for attention, pushing boundaries right off the bat) and there weren’t any men nearby I would have been interested in. I’m certainly not expecting to meet my soulmate down the street like a lot of people seem to think…but across the country makes it hard because most other people, like I said, would rather evaluate those closest to them first. I would rather get it right! No matter where you’re from! Makes me think maybe I should go on a mission trip or something…?

 

[ElyseTaylor]

Amen to that! I know too many couple who regret not waiting on the one God had for them…sometimes I feel jealousy from married couples because I’m still “free” to do what I want with my time. I guess the grass really is greener on the other side because I’m thinking “I can’t believe you have been blessed with a spouse and kids just like you wanted…and now you’re sitting here judging me while also being jealous?!”

 

[Bataar]

I agree. And I feel you on the suicidal thoughts…but God wants us to give this suffering to him in expiation of sins.

But I agree with you if would Really help if there was Some kind of ministry for us. We tend to get lost in the crowd and forgotten about until we can join the ranks of the married people. And plenty of people want to ask why like it’s your own fault, but being Catholic there aren’t a lot of local options. Especially not without a little help. But it can be embarrassing to get the word out that you would like assistance. I am right there with you!!

I tried a catholic dating website, but I got so overwhelmed by multiple messages fired off back to back before I could even Read them that it really creeped me out. That kind of behavior is super common among narcissists with low self-esteem (pushing for attention, pushing boundaries right off the bat) and there weren’t any men nearby I would have been interested in. I’m certainly not expecting to meet my soulmate down the street like a lot of people seem to think…but across the country makes it hard because most other people, like I said, would rather evaluate those closest to them first. I would rather get it right! No matter where you’re from! Makes me think maybe I should go on a mission trip or something…?

Again, I know the feeling. I tried a Catholic dating site around here for a couple of years and no results. There were so few people on it and even fewer that accepted critical church teachings that I eventually gave up with it. I’d check it every month or so and the pool never seemed to grow. The Seattle area is not a good place to meet Catholics. Thanks to the tech sector here, it’s not even a good place to meet women at all. I just read an article about this and they claim that for every 100 single women, there are 145 single men. I need to move.

 

[Elf01]

ElyseTaylor:

I agree. And I feel you on the suicidal thoughts…but God wants us to give this suffering to him in expiation of sins.

But I agree with you if would Really help if there was Some kind of ministry for us. We tend to get lost in the crowd and forgotten about until we can join the ranks of the married people. And plenty of people want to ask why like it’s your own fault, but being Catholic there aren’t a lot of local options. Especially not without a little help. But it can be embarrassing to get the word out that you would like assistance. I am right there with you!!

I tried a catholic dating website, but I got so overwhelmed by multiple messages fired off back to back before I could even Read them that it really creeped me out. That kind of behavior is super common among narcissists with low self-esteem (pushing for attention, pushing boundaries right off the bat) and there weren’t any men nearby I would have been interested in. I’m certainly not expecting to meet my soulmate down the street like a lot of people seem to think…but across the country makes it hard because most other people, like I said, would rather evaluate those closest to them first. I would rather get it right! No matter where you’re from! Makes me think maybe I should go on a mission trip or something…?

Again, I know the feeling. I tried a Catholic dating site around here for a couple of years and no results. There were so few people on it and even fewer that accepted critical church teachings that I eventually gave up with it. I’d check it every month or so and the pool never seemed to grow. The Seattle area is not a good place to meet Catholics. Thanks to the tech sector here, it’s not even a good place to meet women at all. I just read an article about this and they claim that for every 100 single women, there are 145 single men. I need to move.

I am so tempted to try my hand at matchmaking, but I’ve had about as much luck as you two in the dating department.

I’ve joked that if God is calling me to marriage he will have to have my future spouse knock at my door and say I’m here to marry Elf.

 

[DeniseNY]

I’m 40 years old and single. I have no reasonable hope of ever finding a good wife. This is depressing. The feeling of loneliness is terrible. The temptation of suicide is there at times but so far it’s not strong. It would be nice of the church offered something

I would encourage you to seek counseling.

 

[Zzyzx_Road]

I’m 40 years old and single. I have no reasonable hope of ever finding a good wife. This is depressing. The feeling of loneliness is terrible. The temptation of suicide is there at times but so far it’s not strong. It would be nice of the church offered something . Every ministry is geared toward youth or married families. My relationship with the church is going to Mass on Sunday. I don’t know the name of a single other person at the church because there’s nothing else for me to do or participate in.

Stop looking in the mirror. Really.

Every ministry? Surely you can be a Eucharistic Minister. No, that’s not a singles thing but it does get you into the community at Mass and it does force you to focus on other people and what you’re doing for them instead of spending the entire Mass feeling down on yourself. Maybe that focus on others will inspire you to find other actions/activities.

 

[Fraevo63]

I’m 55, male, unmarried and would love to get married if anyone’s interested.

 

[fin]

That’s okay, even if you are single you can still try to help introduce other people. I am single too, and if I can help other singles by suggesting events, or arranging meetings, I like doing that.

 

[tuscany]

Why don’t some of you men and women here posting and looking to meet someone, start private messaging each other? There are folks from differing countries that have met here on CAF and started private messaging, fell in love and have married and are happy. You never know…

 

[Fraevo63]

@tuscany

How can I know if someone is okay with being messaged? I am, by the way, okay with it.

 

[tuscany]

@tuscany

How can I know if someone is okay with being messaged? I am, by the way, okay with it.

O.K. Ladies, Fraevo63 is definitely interested in getting to know some of you, so any of you interested in private messaging him, he said he is fine with you contacting him. SO DO IT !

Tuscany’s Introduction Service…
“Where- we- get- singles- to- take- a- chance- by- doing- something- totally- different- than- they- normally- would- since- what- they- have- been- doing- sure- isn’t- working…”

 

[tuscany]

Ooops, I forgot to add…
Any others interested in meeting other like minded singles, do exactly what Fraevo63 did, and SAY that you are O.K. with getting a personal message. Take a chance and introduce yourself to one another and ask if they would be interested in personal messaging. DO IT !!

Tuscany’s Introduction Service…
“Where- we- get- singles- to- take- a- chance- by- doing- something- totally- different- than- they- normally- would- since- what- they- have- been- doing- sure- isn’t- working…”

 

[Fraevo63]

@tuscany Your experiment here thus far hasn’t worked, but it was/is a noble effort. I would like to think that somewhere out there is a unmarried, Catholic Christian woman in her 50’s for me and I for her… sigh…

 

[Irishmom2]

First things first, Fraevo.
Becoming Catholic may change things in your life in ways you can’t imagine.
Be hopeful and positive.
And be at peace.

 

[Elf01]

Ooops, I forgot to add…
Any others interested in meeting other like minded singles, do exactly what Fraevo63 did, and SAY that you are O.K. with getting a personal message. Take a chance and introduce yourself to one another and ask if they would be interested in personal messaging. DO IT !!

I believe that has resulted in at least one CAF marriage.

 

[tuscany]

Well, darn. I read CAF posts all the time from lonely women looking for nice CATHOLIC men, and here I find one for them and … (I couldn’t find crickets… ).

 

[ElyseTaylor]

I’m 37 living in the Seattle area, ideally looking for someone younger than my stepfather who was born in 1966.

 

[Elf01]

I’m 37 living in the Seattle area, ideally looking for someone younger than my stepfather who was born in 1966.

OK I have to do this, I think you and @Bataar should exchange PMs and see how you get on.

If it results in a marriage I want an invite, and an intro to my future spouse.

 

[ElyseTaylor]

What’s funny about your comment is that even though there may be more men I should feel more hopeful about my chances, however, because it is the liberal techie NW everyone I see in dating sites are all in their 30s, but are “not sure what they’re looking for” and atheist (or a moralistic agnostic at best, most of the time) so it seems like there just aren’t any options for me…

 

[Norseman82]

I know too many couple who regret not waiting on the one God had for them

We need to ditch the false notion that God has one and only one spouse picked out for us since before the beginning of time. Karl Keating had an article on this called “The non-existant Prince Charming”. It used to be in the article archives, but no longer is. You may be able to find it by googling it.